Uncharted Territory
by Lady Carlton
Summary: Always used to be the one to take the lead and get into action, Steve suddenly finds himself having to deal with something completely new to his life - to stand on the sidelines. Steve/OC - R&R - COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Still not sure how long this will be. It can be a short story, with some drama going on, possibly a lot of whump, but it can also be something a little longer and with all that and maybe more... But, for now, let's wait and see.

**Not A/U, but we'll take a trip to Steve's past before we get to the the part the Five-0 Task Force is created.**

**Disclaimer:** _Do not own anything H50 related; I do own London though, and whatever OC you might find here..._

_Feedback is highly appreciated!  
><em>

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><p><em>"Rise high out of this whole scene; look down and separate yourself from your worst dream"<em>

_~Alissa Moreno - Far From Here~_

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><p><em>Honestly, never in my life I thought I'd stand where I am - being the one left behind, be sidelined. Standing tall while hoping, praying, begging for her to be safe because I really can't even consider what the other possibility is.<em>

_As a military guy, I was prepared for so many situations, but this... I'm a complete stranger to this. And I hate the feeling._

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><p>"What? You're serious? You cannot be serious. This has to be a joke, and a very stupid one, London..."<p>

Steve shouted while pacing back and forth in his living room after he heard that dreadful news. He knew she wasn't joking, but he expected that he was just having one hell of a nightmare and he would wake up any time soon and it would be nothing but an awful memory._ Oh God, my head is about to explode._

Shutting his eyes closed and rubbing his temple, Steve wished for all that to stop. Just stop. But it never happened. Steve didn't wake up from his nightmare. If anything, it only became worse when she handed him that goddamned letter.

Steve's eyes ran through its lines and, by the time he finished it, he felt like there was a hand inside his chest that was squeezing his heart hard and trying to rip it off his chest.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, trying to hold the tears and the sobs that were starting to build inside.

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><p>Steve and London met when he was in the Navy and she was still a medical student, finishing her residency in Hawaii, at the Hawaii Medical Center.<p>

It was an ordinary day in her life at the hospital and she finally had an hour off when her pager went nuts. A 911 call that made her forget about her break and run as fast as she could to the front door, barely stopping to wear the gown that a nurse was handing her, to wait for the ambulance. There was a shooting at a bank, five victims one had just a few bruises, but the rest of them were barely alive by the time they got to the hospital.

London Alexander, the tall brunette with Asian features, was on her way to become a cardio surgeon the day she put her eyes on Steve McGarrett for the first time. Of course that, by that time, she had no idea who he was or how he would get into her life and make it turn a hundred and eighty degrees in the future - hell, she didn't even know if he would make through the night!

"Male, 28, shot on the chest, left shoulder and lower abdomen, lost conscious about a minute ago, BP 7/5 and dropping.."

London had just finished wearing her blue gloves when she reached the gurney. She was paying extra attention to what the paramedic was saying and she was the first to notice and react when the monitor's irregular beeping turned into a constant and scary long beep that would go on forever.

"He's crashing!" London shouted as she jumped on the gurney and started doing CPR while two other residents were running with them into the hospital. The man she was trying desperately to save was so incredibly pale; one didn't have to be a doctor to realize he had lost a lot of blood. "Page Dr. Weiss. We need an OR. STAT!"

There was a rush inside the hospital, but it was quite organized so London didn't even bother looking around to see if they were actually doing what she said. She was more worried about the guy she was currently on top of, fighting for his life.

"C'mon... Hang in there, buddy... Don't you die on me," she hissed through her teeth, not stopping the CPR for a second. "C'MON!"

Like someone decided to answer her prayers, the flat line accused a peak. And then another. And another. They were weak at first and with a huge gap in between, but after a while it was a somewhat better, they had rhythm and his heart was pumping on its own so she stopped the massage and started checking the patient, trying to see what was his overall condition. To her trained eyes, the gunshot on his chest was incredibly close to his heart, but she couldn't tell for sure if it hit the muscle without cutting him open.

She had just checked the abdomen wound - it didn't seem that bad, at least not compared to the one in the middle of his chest - and was on her way to check the shoulder when she felt a movement.

"We have eyes," someone said, as if London didn't have noticed it.

"Hey, sir. Sir. My name is Doctor London Alexander and you're at the Hawaii Medical Center." London managed to keep her voice steady, low and calm. She'd been trained for that, so it was quite easy. "Can you tell me your name, sir?"

The man beneath her tried to move; he didn't seem to understand what was going on, but, before London could do anything or get any answers, his eyes went shut again and there was a significant change in the monitor beeping.

"Where the hell is Dr. Weiss?" she asked when they got to the third floor, where the OR was waiting. He needed surgery to remove the bullets and fix internal damages, and needed it fast.

"They paged him, but didn't have answer," said a nurse that was right behind her.

"Well, page him again!" London demanded as soon as she entered the small room where she would scrub in. She had little time to get ready - only the time to the Anesthetist work. "This man needs surgery and he needs it now, so page him until he answers it!"

.

A long minute passed after London finished scrubbing in and was waiting by the now unconscious patient.

"For God's sake, where is Dr. Weiss?" she shouted at the nurse by the intercom.

"They can't find him, Dr. Alexander," she announced weakly.

_"Damn.. Where the hell is that idiot?"_ Her brain was working nonstopping. She wasn't an attendant yet, she was just a resident and she needed an attendant to be there with her during an operation. But that man wouldn't make it until the cardio attendant answered his goddamned pager and decided to show up. If she knew him enough - and she did - he should be in an on call room, and that was the furthest she allowed her mind to wander. "Page Dr. Colben. 911."

Dr. James Colben wasn't a cardio surgeon - he was a general surgeon but London would take whatever she could. She would not let that man die on her watch.

Then the pressure started dropping again and she decided she just couldn't wait. She would deal with the consequences later.

"Scalpel," she said, reaching out to the nurse directly in front of her and noticed when she hesitated. "Look, if we don't do something right now, this man will die. But he's my patient and I won't let that happen without at least trying to give him a chance to fight for his life, so, give me that scalpel or get of my OR!"

London's words were incredibly cold and even threatening so the nurse handed her the silvery knife while everyone's eyes on the resident. London took a deep breath and nodded shortly to everyone in that room.

"Okay everyone, let's save a life," she said to everyone calmly, then looking one last time to the man's face, she whispered: "Stay with me." Adding a_ "please"_ in her head, she made the first cut on his chest.

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><p>"What were you thinking? Huh? <strong>What. The hell. Were you. Thinking!<strong> You arrogant child! Are you that much stupid?"

After four hours of surgery, that's what she got. An attending yelling at her because she didn't wait for him to operate. And she would cope with the yelling and his hurt ego, especially because they were now at the Chief of Surgery room, but when she offended her, London didn't care if the man was an attending who could easily get her out of every single case that happened to appear after that or if he was the Pope. She would not accept that quietly.

"You listen to me, you evil little creature. I paged you a million times! I had a man whom was shot, three times, and one shot was close to his heart. Actually, it hit it, but I was able to fix it before it would get him killed! And you were nowhere to be found. So, if I had waited for your royalty to show up, that man would be in the morgue right now, and not in a bed, RECOVERING!"

London's voice went a bit louder by the end, but she didn't regret it. She was sure she just got herself a time on the penalty box for God knows how long, but she saved a life, and that was the best feeling ever.

Not even the deadly glare of Dr. David Weiss would get that victory from her. And when he was about to say something to her, the Chief intervene and it made her grin inwardly.

"Alright, that's enough! Both of you. That's enough." London and Weiss were looking at the Chief now, waiting for what he would do about that. "Doctor Weiss, I'd like to ask you to pay attention to your page. When it rings, you _answer it_. I don't care if you're using the toilet. Someone pages you, **you answer it**. Immediately."

"Sir, I was-" Dr. Weiss was about to say what London would define as some stupid and lame excuse, but Chief Pryce didn't let him go any further.

"I don't want to hear anything about it. Just do what I said. And Doctor Alexander," he turned to look at London and she nodded. "You're suspended from the OR for the next ten days."

"What?" London's jaw dropped open. She was what? That was unfair! She had saved that man's life! If she had waited for that lazy ass, the man that she now knew as Steven McGarrett would be dead. Ten days out of the OR was so not fair.

"That's my final word, Dr. Alexander. And you'll take care of your patient during that time."

He could not be serious. Ten days out of the OR and ten days watching over a patient? She had nothing against checking on patients but was that really necessary?

"That's it. You can go now... Go!"

Dr. Weiss was the first to follow the Chief's order. With a preposterous smile on his ugly face, he walked past London and out of the door with a pose of an agonizing chicken, London thought to herself. That man was a huge pain in her ass, and she couldn't wait for the moment when she could fly solo, without his cranky face to glare at her.

She was already on her way out when the Chief called her one more time. "London," he said and when she turned to face him, Chief Pryce was smiling at her. "Great work."

A huge smile appeared on her face after that; muttering a "thank you, Sir.", London walked out of the Chief's room to the 502 room, where her special assignment was. He was unconscious but recovering. And thanks to London, Steven J. McGarrett would survive.

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><p>It's been two days since London was suspended from the OR. Two very long days, but, to her surprise, it wasn't the lack of cutting and stitching that was getting on her nerves. Her patient, Steve, still had not waked up.<p>

It was near 11:00 PM when she stopped by the nurse station and asked Claire if something had changed.

"Nothing, Dr. Alexander. He's still unconscious..."

Without noticing it, London tightened the grip around the pen that she had on her hands. He should have had waked up already...

"Okay, thanks Claire. I have to check on a patient. Page me if something changes, alright?"

The nurse just nodded. London would ask her that every time she stopped by, and, since yesterday, she had said yes to that request easily over ten times. And over ten times, not a single thing changed.

.

London was just checking an old man that would have a coronary artery bypass surgery the next day - which she wouldn't be able to be part of because she was still grounded.

"That's it, Mr. Franks. Everything's cool. Now, you just need to rest because tomorrow you will feel brand new," she said softly and with a smile on her face. The man was eighty three years old and London knew better than to add more stress to the situation. A surgery on someone that old is always risky, so she had to make sure he would rest as much as possible, and that he'd be the less stressed possible.

"Will you be there with me?" he asked with a tired voice as he reached for her hand.

"Unfortunately I won't, Mr. Franks. I have to take care of a patient, but I assure you, you'll be well taken care of. You won't even need me there!"

"Oh, that's crap," the old man said unhappy and it made London squeeze his hand softly while this small smile played the corner of her lips. She was about to say something when her pager went off.

"Excuse me, Mr. Franks," she apologized and reached for the small object in her coat pocket. It was from the nurse station in front of Steve's room. 911. _Hell..._

Apologizing with the elderly patient, London walked out of his room quite calmly, but when she was out of his sight, she rushed to the room 502, but stopping before she reached it - she found Claire in the middle of the hallway.

"Claire, talk to me. What happened?" London asked urgent, already pulling her hair up on a ponytail and grabbing the alcohol gel she kept in her pocket in case she needed immediate sterilization.

"He's up, London."

London didn't seem to register the words at first, so she blurted an "_excuse me_?" while her brows twisted in a frown.

"The patient from room 502 woke up. I paged 911 because I thought..." Claire's words were cut when London started to walk again to the room. "Well," the nurse whispered to herself. "That is one very committed doctor, that's for sure."

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	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you everyone who has reviewed, alerted and favorited this story. I very much appreciate it!**

**A/N:** _I noticed that some people (I should say everyone) are wondering what the hell is Steve doing in Hawaii. I'll get to that in the near future._

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><p>Steve woke up feeling like he'd been hit by an asteroid or something like it. His entire body was hurting, his head was pounding and his when he inhaled deeply, the air went burning down his chest.<p>

He opened his eyes and the brightness on the room he was currently at made him shut them as fast as he could.

_"Where the hell am I?"_ Steve thought, and his unspoken question was soon answered when he looked at the door and saw a nurse walking in.

He was at a hospital, and when he noticed the whole lot of bandages wrapping his body, he also realized why he was feeling that awful.

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><p>London stopped at the station just to get the patient's chart. It was supposed to be in the room but, because she was checking it constantly, she just left it out there.<p>

When Steve didn't wake up after the surgery like it was expected, London started to panic slowly. What if she had screwed up? No. That was impossible. She was perfect. But then, why he didn't wake up? Crap...

Now, all those doubts would be gone. She walked into the room where a nurse was just finishing changing his medication.

"Hi there," she said glancing at the sleepy man, lying on the bed, over the chart. "Nice to see you finally decided to join the party. Not that there is an actual party happening here, but anyways."

Steve squinted while looking at the woman standing next to his bed. He couldn't see her perfectly, his view was blurry so the only way he could tell it was a woman was because of the voice. She had a soft and pretty voice.

"Whe-"

He tried to speak but his throat was super dry and it itched so the next thing he knew was he was coughing his lungs out.

"Hang on," she said putting the chart down and reaching for a glass of water that the nurse had taken with her, obviously aware that he'd need it soon. "Here, drink it. It's just water," she offered him a straw so he could ease the dryness of his throat that hadn't been used in quite a long time.

Steve felt awkward drinking water from a straw and while someone hold the cup for him, but that thought vanished from his head the moment the liquid made its way down his throat - the sensation was awful and he couldn't describe it, but it made him want to spit it out. Of course he didn't do it because it would be too embarrassing, so, trying his best to not let the woman see his face twisting, Steve took a few small sips of what she had said it was just water - it tasted pretty bad in his opinion.

He cleared his throat and, and only attempted to speak again when he was convinced that he was able to do that with some dignity.

"What... What happened?" Steve asked; his voice sounded husky and a little unsteady, but he didn't waste much time thinking about that; instead, he locked his eyes on the doctor.

She had dropped the chart and turned her full attention to the man in front of her. Steve looked a little groggy and a somewhat weak, but that was all thanks to the surgery, blood loss, and all the drama he went through. "There was a shooting at a bank, Sir.," she said calmly, but very seriously. London made a pause and waited for any reaction, but he just kept his eyes on her, so, taking a deep breath, she continued: "You, sir., was hit. Three times. One bullet to the shoulder, lower abdomen and one was quite close to the heart. Don't worry, we managed to fix it all," she added quickly when his hands flew to his torso. "Although, we'll keep you here a few more days because there were some complications..."

"What complications?" Steve asked startled.

"Your blood loss was quite severe, and you went into cardiac arrest two times. Once as soon as you arrived at the hospital, and one on the table during surgery, and you've been out for a while now so, for precaution, you'll stay here for a few more days."

"Wait," he asked, trying to sit, but it made his body burn in pain so he stopped immediately. "A while? How long I've been here?"

"Two days," she said; then, checking her watch, she added: "almost three."

"Damn," he hissed through his teeth while throwing his head back and sinking on the bed. Steve remained quiet for a moment - he was a little shocked with all that. "Will I be able to go back on duty?" he asked eventually; concern was starting to grow on Steve really fast, geometric progression proportions.

"I just requested some exams and tests for you, so we'll get back on that later," she said cautiously.

Leaning against the pillow with his eyes were closed, Steve let out a groan, startling the doctor.

"Sir, are you alright?" she asked, grabbing the stethoscope as fast as it was possible not even waiting for his answer.

"Yeah... Everything's fine," he said quite firmly, but that didn't stop her from checking his heart rate. "Just... I return in one piece from Iraq, a war zone, to end up in a hospital because of an ass trying to rob a bank in Hawaii. Unbelievable," Steve said with a nervous chuckle while leaning back on the bed. Then he turned to face the woman who was by his side. "I'm sorry, for the ass comment..."

London couldn't avoid a small smile. He was a military - she should have known... "It's okay. Keeping things between us, he was an ass, not to say something worst. But I wouldn't call your misfortune unbelievable," she said softly, while putting the object back around her neck. "I'd call it a perfect timing."

"Perfect timing?" Steve asked with a frown; he was shifting on the bed, trying to find a position a little more comfortable, but he stopped when he heard those words. "How so?"

"Being a doctor, I can tell that if you suffered injures like those in Iraq, your chances of survival wouldn't be that good," she said seriously, causing Steve to take a deep breath. "Anyways, if you need anything, press this button," she showed him a small device with a single red button on it, "and someone will come to check on you pretty fast."

London was already on her way out when she heard a "wait". Stopping by the door, she turned to look at him.

"Yes?"

"You didn't tell me your name," he said simply.

"I'm Doctor London Alexander. And you should rest, Mr. McGarrett."

.

It's been a while since the doctor left the room, leaving Steve alone with his thoughts, but her voice was still echoing in his mind when a nurse walked into the room with another doctor to take him for a few exams.

_London Alexander._

The name wouldn't let go of Steve's head. Or her face for that matter. He had a feeling he knew that woman somehow, but didn't remember where he'd seen her. He was still thinking about that when a nurse came into his room and gave him something that made him fall asleep before he could count to ten.

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><p>When Steve woke up the next day, he remembered why he knew Doctor London Alexander. Because he'd seen her before.<p>

"It was you... You were the girl on top of me," he blurted when the familiar face walked into his room.

"Excuse me?" London said squinting and then she went checking his chart and medication. "Let's recheck the painkillers," she whispered to herself but Steve heard it.

"What? No!" He suddenly understood her reaction. "No. I mean... That's not..." Steve rubbed his face, trying to get rid of the sleep and the embarrassment he just caused himself. "I had a feeling I knew you. I knew you. You were the one who was there when I got here... If that makes sense."

"It does," London replied, smiling in amusement. "I mean, sort of. Yes, it was me. I didn't think you'd remember that." She remembered he was on and off and not most people remember it; the brain usually blocks those memories.

"How could I not? You practically saved my life," Steve said sitting straight while London checked his stitches.

"I'm pretty sure I saved your life," she said grabbing the stethoscope to check his heart. "Twice," London added with a half smile.

"Twice? Wow… Guess I owe you a lot," Steve said looking at her. He was still a little dizzy because of the bunch of medications he was taking, but he could see her - and she was smiling. That was a beautiful view.

"No, you don't," she said while listening to his quite strong heartbeats. He was great, and that made her smile grow bigger. "It's my job, so it's not like I'll hold it against you. Would you lean forward for me, please?" Steve obeyed and London checked his lungs. "Take a deep breath... Okay, again... Good."

London put the stethoscope down and walked to the end of the bed. "I have news for you, Mr. McGarrett. I got your results and they're good. You're healing fine, everything is alright."

"So, when can I leave?"

"Not that fast," London said with a half smile that caused him to smile back. "Like I said last night, you'll have to stay here for a while, just for precaution."

"And I'll be able to - go back?" Steve asked a little nervous and London couldn't blame him; she knew what he was talking about. He wanted to know if his career was safe or if it was over.

"If you do as we say, and allow your body a full recovery," she said with a lot of emphasis on those words to make sure that Steve would get the message, and then she continued a bit softer: "I can't see why not."

Steve closed his eyes and allowed an inner celebration. "That's good, thanks," he said opening his eyes so he could look at London.

"Don't mention it. I have something else for you," London said, but before Steve could ask what was it, she walked to the door and nodded at someone outside.

When the person she was talking to appeared by the door, Steve held his breath unconsciously.

"Dad," Steve whispered; his eyes locked on the man that had just entered his room. Even though he was in Hawaii, he was staying at the base and haven't seen his father yet.

"Hey, Steven..."

London knew she was in the middle of something very personal for both men, so she just walked out of the room, giving them the privacy they needed.

"Doctor Alexander, visit time is over," Claire whispered when she stopped at the nurse station right in front of Steve's room.

"I know, just... give them a moment," London said simply while turning her attention to the very small amount of work she had.

. . .


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you everyone who's taking some time to read this story, whether you review it or not._

**Disclaimer:** _Own nothing but my OCs and the plot..._

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><p>It was 3:27 AM when London finally got home. Her shift ended at 1 AM, but, since Dr. Weiss wasn't making things any easier for her, she had to do rounds and check on his patients - and there were plenty.<p>

But London didn't really mind staying late; medicine was her passion and she truly liked helping people, so it wasn't exactly a punishment for her to stay a little longer. What felt like a blow to her head was to wake up before 6 AM, on her day off, to the sound of her cell phone.

"Hello," she answered, not even bothering trying to hide her sleepy voice.

"London, you might want to come to the hospital. Right now."

It was Claire. She was not only a nurse, but also a close friend. When London came to Hawaii to finish her studies and become a surgeon, Claire was one of the nicest people with her.

"And why would I want that, Claire? It is my day off," London replied half asleep.

"We have a situation with one of your patients," she said cautiously. "Mr. McGarrett."

Hearing that made London forget the fact that she hadn't had a decent sleep in almost fifty seven hours. She was highly alert and up in no time.

"On my way," she said urgent.

London got to the hospital less than ten minutes later. Her apartment wasn't a block away and it was early so she got there quite fast. She literally ran into the building and almost ran over Claire who happened to be on the ER.

"Walk with me, Clair. Tell me what happened," London said, pulling her hair up on a ponytail and walking fast to get to the elevators.

"Well, we gave Mr. McGarrett his usual medication so he could sleep, but, somehow, he woke up before it was expected and got out of bed by himself... We didn't notice it at first, until we heard this loud noise coming from his room..." Claire's speech was interrupted when the doors went open and they left, heading towards the nurse station where London just took some time to grab a pair of gloves. "And when we got there, he was-"

"Bleeding." London finished Claire's sentence shortly before she walked into the room 502. There were two nurses in there; McGarrett was back on the bed, all the wires glued back on his torso but his gown was still stained with blood. With some _'excuse me'_s and _'thank you'_s, London took her place by his bed.

"Mr. McGarrett, would you like to explain to me what happened?" she said wearing the gloves she had taken. Even though he was trying to hide it, London could see he was in a lot of pain. She asked for some morphine to the closest nurse, but didn't wait to see him running out of the room.

"Nothing, I was just-" his voice broke and he shut his eyes closed when she put a small amount of pressure on his abdomen. She'd have to redo some stitches on that area, but her main concern, his chest, and his shoulder seemed to be fine. "I was just trying to get to the bathroom," Steve hissed while London continued her inspection.

"Well, thanks to your little enterprise, I'll have to make new sutures," London told him before turning to the two remaining nurses. "Bring me a suture kit with lidocaine 2%, please? Thank you."

Claire and the woman named Laura turned their backs to London and walked out of the room to get what she needed in the exact same moment when nurse Eric returned with the small bottle containing the while liquid that would make the pain go away.

Now that the adrenaline wasn't no longer filling her veins, London tried to hold back a yawn but that worked just as fine as trying to hold smoke in her hands.

"I'm sorry," Steve said and it made London stop what she was doing to look at him with this confused look in her eyes; She was just finishing removing the old stitches and was about to start cleaning it to avoid an infection.

"What for?" she asked, her brows furrowed.

"Keeping you from sleeping," he said apologetically. "You seem very tired..."

"Don't worry about that," London replied calmly. Claire and Laura had returned with the sewing kit and the lidocaine; reaching out to what she needed, she thanked both women and said they could go. Shifting her eyes back to his abdomen, London applied some of the anesthetic before working with the needle. "Just don't do it again and we're good."

"I'll try to," Steve said, but London didn't quite believe him; she knew enough of military people to buy that.

"You better," London whispered while finishing her work. She then reached for clean bandages to cover it. "Or next time I won't be that gentle."

Discarding the gloves and all the used material, London turned her back to Steve and walked to the door. She was looking for a resident but didn't find any and she needed a CT scan.

"Mr. McGarrett, don't even think about getting of this bed," London said from the door, even though he had morphine in his system. "Doctor's order," she added before leaving the room.

.

"Doctor Alexander, I thought today was your day off."

Chief Pryce spotted her when he was walking by the CT room and noticed she was wearing scrubs.

"It is, Sir.," she said quickly glancing at him and then, shifting her eyes back to the screen, paying attention to the scan. "I just needed to check on a patient, that's all."

Chief Pryce frowned. "Someone else could have done that, Doctor Alexander."

"Probably, Sir. But I'm already here so..."

That wasn't actually something that would raise a red flag on his radar. Doctor Alexander was one of those doctors that spend most part of her time, even her free time, in that hospital. The Chief of Surgery had lost count of how many times he had to almost kick her out so she could get some proper rest. She was committed to the job and that's why he knew she would have a brilliant career.

"Alright, just make sure I don't find you here again," he said turning his back to her.

"Can't promise you anything, Chief," London replied, making Chief Pryce to smile inwardly. She was, in all ways, a better doctor than the cardio surgeon he had in that hospital, and, now that she was finishing her residency, he had hopes to keep her as an attendant of Hawaii Medical Center.

.

To London's delight, Steve's CT was good. No damages on the inside. That made her smile and celebrate on the inside.

"Everything's fine, Mr. McGarrett," she said once they were back to his room. "Luckily, you just messed with the exterior, but don't push it. If you want to get back to the fun, you need to sit tight and rest. Do you copy?"

Steve chuckled with that last sentence. "Copy that, ma'am. I'll behave."

"You better," she replied as serious as she could get, and that wasn't too serious. London was tired and starting to get cranky, but she knew better than to blame it on the patient, even though it was entirely his fault that she was there and not in her house, sleeping like a baby in her bed. Also, that patient was different. He reminded London of some things she was trying to forget, but, surprisingly enough, she didn't mind. "Otherwise I'll make sure you get into an OR next time," she added with a gentle small smile. "Now, seriously. You need to rest, Mr. McGarrett."

"Only if you stop calling me Mr. McGarrett," Steve replied with a half smile on his face. That made London remember about the doctor-patient rule; not that something was happening because it wasn't... At least that's what she told herself at that moment.

"Rest," she said, willingly ignoring Steve's last words and walking out of the room when Claire came with his medication.

About fifteen minutes later, London was back to her apartment and ready to do the one thing she wanted the most: crawl into bed and sleep sixteen hours straight, until she had to go get ready to back to the hospital again.

London never knew if she fell asleep before or after her head touched the pillow, but the image of Steve McGarrett smiling at her was the last thing in her mind before she passed out in her king sized bed.

* * *

><p>"No, seriously. Are you really a surgeon or you just said that to impress me?"<p>

London just glanced at Steve with the corner of her eyes.

"You got me. I'm just trying to impress you. It's not like I have something better to do with my life..." London replied sarcastically and quite humorous while checking his stitches for the hundredth time.

It's been seven days since his surgery and they were pretty good. She ordered another round of tests and exams, and if the results continued to get better, he'd be out pretty soon.

Steve chuckled with her reply. "Don't get me wrong, Doctor. But, surgeons aren't... busy people?"

"Are you calling me lazy, Mr. McGarrett?" she asked faking an offended tone. During those four days, they became pretty close, almost like friends or something like it. "If I was you, I'd choose my next words very carefully."

"I never said that," Steve replied throwing his hands in the air. "It's just... I noticed you're always around here, and I'm pretty sure it's not your job to check the sutures... Aren't you supposed to be cutting people? Saving their lives?"

"Well," she said taking her gloves off. "I'd do that if I could..."

Steve noticed she was being evasive, and he probably shouldn't ask his next question but he did it anyways. "And why can't you?"

"Because I'm suspended," she admitted. "And that means I can't get into an OR, so I'm doing what I can, which is taking care of my patients."

There was something in London's voice that made Steve frown. "Okay. I know this is none of my business, but, why are you suspended?"

London sighed heavily. Even though she was always nice and gentle with all the patients, she never talked about things that were private. Never. At least until now.

"I didn't follow the protocol," she said calmly.

"Did you kill someone?" Steve asked; his voice was considerably lower.

"What? NO!" London looked at him; indignity written all over her face. "No, I did not kill anyone... on the other hand. I saved a life," she said, shifting her eyes down to the chart. Her work there was done and she had to check on a few other patients before her shift was over – and she wanted to get out of that situation as soon as possible. "And now I have to go. You. Rest."

Those were her last words before she walked out of the room rather quickly.

Steve considered her words for a while when he reached what he thought it was the only rational conclusion: something happened the day he got to that hospital and it caused her that punishment. What Steve didn't know was what it was. She said she broke protocol but saved a life. Something wasn't fitting...

.

London finished her round that night and was just filling some paperwork, with no rush at all because she was on call that night, when she heard a beep and knew that some patient had just pressed the little button of the remote attached to bed. With a quick glance at the board that was connected to those buttons, she noticed that room 502 had its light on.

She quickly dropped her pen and made her way to McGarrett's room.

"Something's wrong?" London asked politely, already pulling a pair of gloves from her lab coat pocket.

"You tell me," Steve replied with this serious expression.

London frowned to that. What in the world was happening? "Excuse me?" she said confused a few seconds later. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Why are you suspended from surgery?"

Steve's sudden question surprised London a lot and her mouth went slightly open whole her eyes were squinting at him. "I'm sorry, but, I don't think that's something that we sh-"

"I'm fairly certain it's because of me," Steve said, cutting her defensive reply. He wanted to know; he needed to know if something had happened and if he would be able to go back to work. "Something happened during my surgery?"

"No, sir." She said a little coldly. "Nothing happened." London knew she was being quite harsh, but that was personal. And he really didn't need to know.

"So, why?"

London took a deep breath. She knew that they could go on with that forever - maybe he'd even call the Chief.

"Look, made a decision and, in some ways, it was wrong. It was the right thing to do, but I did it the wrong way..." She could not believe she was doing that, telling a patient about her work. That wasn't right... But then again, what he could do? _Sue her?_ Well, that was a possibility. _Sue the hospital?_ Damn, that was also a possibility... London ran a hand through her face. She was so screwed.

"Will you quit stalling and tell me what was it?" Steve insisted when he noticed her hesitation.

When London raised her eyes to meet Steve's once again, he didn't know how to read him. There was worry, maybe some concern, but he also seem pretty angry and that made her flinch. That's why she needed to keep some distance with the patients. She had become too close to that Steve McGarrett and that could just result in the end of her career, before it really started.

"Alright," she said with a sigh. She would have to deal with the consequences of her acts. "As you wish." London stood by the end of his bed and locked her eyes on his. "The day you arrived, Mr. McGarrett, you was barely holding. The combination of blood loss and the gunshot wounds aggravated your condition so you needed surgery immediately, so, we got you into the OR but the surgeon was - busy... I'm a resident; I can't operate without an attendant to supervise, and, like I just said, he wasn't there. So, ignored the protocol and stepped in. I performed a surgery, but, according to the book, I should have waited."

Steve heard that quietly, and even after London stopped talking, he remained silent for a minute or so.

"So, what you said is... You're not allowed to do surgeries because you made my surgery?"

London inhaled deeply. There they go... "Yes."

"And you shouldn't have done it?" Steve asked. The look in his face was completely blank.

"Not without an attendant."

"But you did it anyways."

That wasn't exactly a question, but London confirmed his statement. "Yes, I did."

Steve went silent for what London thought it was an eternity; eventually, she forced herself to look somewhere else because it was torturing to look at that quiet figure in front of her.

"You choose to save my life over following protocol."

The way that Steve said those words made London glance at him. They were soft, and that was unexpected.

"I'm a surgeon. Even though I can't operate on my own, I couldn't just sit and watch you die... That would be unacceptable."

Steve's eyes suddenly eased and London felt her heart skipping a beat. "I guess I should say I'm sorry you're suspended because of me, but I'm not sorry at all... You saved my life."

London knew it was her job. Saving lives, that's what she chose to do for a living and she didn't pride herself because of that. Of course she liked to be able to give someone a chance, a new chance in life, but it's not like that made her larger than life. Just because she chose to be a surgeon, doesn't mean that she was better than anyone. She was still a human, just a woman. But when Steve said those words, and the way he said it, it made her blush.

The way he said that, it was like she had done something huge when, in fact, she just did what she could to try to give that man a second chance. And she succeeded.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to thank you enough, but thanks," Steve said sincerely. "And if there's anything that I can do, anything, just tell me."

"Oh, it's all good," London replied with a shy smile. Somehow, his words were affecting her so much that even her heart rate was starting to increase. "Like I said, I'm not holding that against you, Mr. McGarrett." London was already on her way out of his room when she stopped by the door. "But there's something," she said turning to face him one more time.

Steve had his eyes locked on the Asian woman standing by the door. "What is it?"

"If you go back to Iraq, do me a favor and try not to get yourself killed," she said seriously; then, she turned her back to Steve and walked almost blindly to the closest on call room she could find and that was empty.

London allowed her body to just fall on the mattress. This time, her conversation with Steve McGarrett had triggered some painful memories. Thinking about Iraq made her think about war zones, which made her think about how many people lost their lives and, eventually, made her think about her personal losses. London Alexander had lost close one to situations like that, and, even though Steve wasn't exactly close, she realized that she wouldn't like to learn that the man she just saved was reported KIA.

. . .


	4. Chapter 4

_Thank you everyone who's taking some time to read this story, whether you review it or not. Mahalo!_

**A/N:**_ I am going through their past because I find it seriously odd to just jump into a relationship, so, things here are still from a while ago._

**Disclaimer:** _Own nothing but my OCs and the plot..._

* * *

><p>"Alright, Mr. McGarrett, you're good to go," announced Dr. Pryce, whom Steve had only seen a couple of times before.<p>

"Finally!" Steve exclaimed thrilled. After nine days hospitalized, he was finally getting away from what he considered to be torture. It was awful to be lying in bed 24/7. Well, for the most part of the time, Steve hated that, but there were moments he actually felt a little less miserable. "But... Where's London - I mean, Doctor Alexander?"

"Doctor Alexander is in Maui," informed Dr. Pryce; he also noticed traces of disappointment on McGarrett's face and he wondered how close those two were. "She asked me to give you this," Pryce said, handing him an envelope.

"Thank you, sir.," Steve said a little frustrated, taking what the doctor was giving him.

"You're welcome." Dr Pryce was halfway outside his room and Steve was still contemplating the envelope when he turned to watch the man on the bed. "Just... You're here, alive. Thanks to the skills of a brilliant surgeon. Make sure you'll honor it just as much as the uniform, Lieutenant McGarrett."

"Wait. How do you...?" Steve frowned. He wasn't in a military hospital and he doubted that they knew his rank there.

"I served in the Navy when I was younger, I can tell when I have a military guy in hospital," Dr. Pryce explained and Steve's eyes widened with surprise. "Remember what I said, Lieutenant. And good luck."

Steve watched as Dr. Pryce turned his back to him once again and, this time, walked away. He kept staring the empty space until Nurse Claire, who was just passing by, noticed that and returned to check on Steve.

"Are you alright, Mr. McGarrett?" she asked quietly as she walked through the door.

"Yes," he said blinking a couple of times and shifting his gaze to the woman in front of him. "Yes, I'm fine. Great."

"Okay then. Do you need something?"

"No, thank you. I'm good," he said giving her a half smile. "Oh. Wait, uh - my clothes?"

"About that," Claire said, and Steve noticed she was a little embarrassed about that. "When you came here, we didn't have much time to undress you properly... There was too much blood and-"

"They were cut," Steve finished. That was great. He would need some clothes if he wanted to leave that hospital. He was just thinking about calling his father when Claire spoke again.

"Yes. But here," she said, reaching for a small bag that was lying on the armchair. Steve took it with a dubious expression. "Open it," Claire encouraged him and he did it, but without dropping the frown.

There were a T-Shirt, a pair of jeans, even sneakers. It all seemed to be his size and brand new; there weren't any price tags but they were most definitely not used.

"Since we had to throw your outfit away, Doctor Alexander made sure you'd have some decent clothes to wear once you were discharged," Claire said with a smile and Steve's jaw dropped slightly open. "Take care, Mr. McGarrett."

Claire was just leaving when Steve finally recovered his ability to speak.

"Wait... Why Doctor Alexander is in Maui?"

"She had to collect some organs to a transplant," the nurse explained. "And she won't be back for the next four hours..."

Steve nodded. "Alright, thank you... Thanks."

"You're welcome." Claire was already out of the room, but returned to tell him one last thing. "She'll be here tomorrow. Until 9 PM." With a small smile she let Steve alone with his clothes and his unread message.

.

He had already changed into his new clothes and was about to walk out of the hospital when he took the envelope that Dr. Pryce gave him, from London.

There was a small note and, judging by the handwriting, it was written in a hurry. It says:

_"Good luck wherever you go to, and try to be safe. Sorry I wasn't there.  
>Take care, Steven.<br>London."_

Steve read those simple lines more than just once when he got to his place at the base. He had an appointment with a doctor from the Navy the next day to check when he would be able to be deployed again, but he would find a way to stop at the Hawaii Medical Center.

* * *

><p>"Where are the CT scans I asked for Mrs. Phelps?" London asked one of the nurses for the fifth time.<p>

"They'll be ready in five minutes, Doctor Alexander," she answered calmly. "I just spoke to the technician; he's rushing it for you."

"Thanks Gina," she said taking a deep breath.

London wasn't exactly cheerful when her shift started Friday morning. It was her tenth and final day in the penalty box, but she wished Chief Pryce could just give her a break and let her get into the OR.

Surgery was like a therapy for her, and when she was able to scrub in and get into an OR in Maui the day before, that was good. Actually, it was a little bit bittersweet because she heard just moments before that McGarrett would be discharged - and she wouldn't be there.

London tried to take Steve off of her head ever since she returned to Oahu and learned that he wasn't there anymore. He was a patient and it was quite obvious that, sooner or later, he'd be gone. And that time has come and now she needed to focus on her job.

By 7 PM, London didn't have anything to do; no rounds, no more patients, not even paperwork... She was almost wishing for someone to call the Hospital reporting an accident or something, but she wiped that idea off just as soon as it came - she was a doctor and needed to think about the welfare of the people and not her own.

She was just about to get into an on call room to rest until someone require her assistance when she heard someone calling her name.

"Doctor Alexander." It was Chief Pryce. "I've been looking for you."

"Something's wrong, sir.?"

"No," he said calmly. "But someone's waiting for you at the reception."

London frowned. She wasn't expecting any visits or whatever it was. "Who is it?"

"One of your patients."

Oh crap. A patient? That was not acceptable. She never lost any patients in her life! London didn't even ask which patient it was, she just ran to the reception as fast as she could.

Thankfully, there was a resident standing by the reception counter.

"Nick! Nick, have you seen my patient?"

Nicholas Larsson was probably her best friend in that hospital, along with Claire. He and London started their residency together and now they were almost finishing it; she intended to be a cardio while he was aiming for neuro surgery.

"Wait a minute. Doctor Alexander lost a patient? Where is the press?" he said in a playful tone, making London slightly punch his arm.

"This is not a joke, Nicholas! It's not funny. I did not lose a patient... I just... I don't know what happened," London said sighing, and then, resting her elbows on the counter, she held her head with her hands.

"Relax, Alex..."

Nick was probably the only person who called her Alex. He rarely called her London because he said it was a bit odd, but she didn't mind anymore, she was used to that, after all, they dated for about two years while they were in Med. School.

"Sure, like I could magically do that," London ranted before raising her head once again and straightening her posture. That was it. She didn't have time to complain - it was time to be a doctor and find her patient. "Excuse me," she said to one of the women that were working at the reception. "I'm Doctor Alexander. Chief Pryce told me one of my patients is here?"

"Sure. He's right there." The woman pointed to the area with lots of armchairs, arranged side by side. There were lots of people there. "Mr. McGarrett."

"Who?" London's question was completely automatic and involuntary. She heard the woman perfectly, she was just not expecting that.

Then, she turned to look at the place the woman pointed and found him quite fast; it shouldn't have made her feel that good, but it did. Forgetting about Nick, London walked towards Steve. He had his back to where she was standing so he didn't see her coming.

"A little over twenty four hours and you already returned?" London said when she stopped behind him. "Are you trying to set a record or something?"

Steve stood up the moment he heard that familiar voice, and found himself looking at the woman that was once his doctor, London Alexander, with her dark hair, dark eyes, pale skin and a beautiful smile.

"Hey. No. No, I'm not," Steve said, smiling back at her. "I just wanted to thank you."

"What for?" London asked, tilting her head a little to her right. Steve thought that was really cute.

"The clothes," he said, walking around the chairs and standing in front of her. "Otherwise I'd have to leave with that hospital gown..."

"Oh. That. Yeah, walking out on that gown would be pretty weird... But since I was the one to throw your clothes away, I felt it was only fair enough if I replaced them, so, you really don't have to thank me," London said. Her hands were buried on the pockets of her lab coat, and when she felt her pager, she remembered where she was. "I'm sorry, uh- something's wrong? Are you feeling something unusual, any pain?"

Steve frowned a little. "What? No, I'm good."

"You sure?" Londo asked. They were in a hospital and London's thoughts jumped to the one reason people went to hospitals - medical care.

"Yeah," Steve said reassuringly. "Actually, I had an appointment with a Navy doctor today so he could tell when I'd be able to go back on duty and he said that I was well taken care of. He said, and I quote _'whoever did your surgery knew perfectly well what it had to be done, and did it beautifully'_."

London smiled shyly. She didn't know how to take that compliment; she did what she had to do, what she learned to do.

"Well, thank you, I am very flattered," she said still smiling, but she was still confused with his presence there. "Look, don't get this the wrong way, you are a ray of sunshine, but, what are you doing here?"

"I got your message from Dr. Pryce and I thought I should stop by and say hi since you weren't here yesterday," Steve said casually and it made the small smile on London's face grow a bit. Actually, she was struggling to not smile so much and her cheeks were starting to hurt.

"How considerate," she replied looking at the man in front of her. "I really appreciate your gesture…"

"Right. So, I know you're working and I'm sort of taking your time, but, just…" Steve made a pause and he felt a knot in his stomach. He thought about that moment so many times, more than he was willing to admit and he felt a bit nervous. "Would you join me for dinner?" he asked after a few seconds. Nervousness and dinner invitations weren't exactly his thing, but then again, things between them two weren't exactly normal; a SEAL ending up in the hospital because he was in the middle of an assault and a surgeon who had to play nurse for ten days, that was pretty out of the ordinary, so he decided to go for it.

London's eyes widened as her jaw dropped slightly open in astonishment. Dinner with Steve sounded incredibly appealing, after all, he wasn't her patient anymore, she knew he was a good company and, truth be told, he was damn hot.

It took her a few seconds to process that and, in the mean time, Steve was waiting – and waiting was something he really disliked.

"I uh- I appreciate your offer," she managed to speak after a while, after going through her schedule mentally. "But I'm a bit busy this week so…"

"How about tonight?" Steve asked simply and London almost choked. She checked her watch and noticed it was 7:36 pm. "I know you're not on call," he said casually, and London just looked at him. _How on Earth he knew that?_ Then her unspoken question was answered; "Claire told me."

Obviously.

"I would love to have dinner with you, but I still have some time to spend here-"

London was so caught up with her conversation with Steve that she didn't notice when the room emptied a little and Chief Pryce stood right behind her, by the reception counter, in the exact same spot she was moments ago with Nick Larsson.

"Doctor Alexander," he called her loudly before she could finish what she was telling Steve. London turned incredibly fast to look at her boss, and, muttering an '_excuse me_', she walked to where the Chief was standing.

"Yes, sir.?"

"You can go," he said simply, making London once again get surprised. That was the day to surprises.

"But my shift only ends at nine, sir…"

Chief Pryce looked from London to Steve then back to London. "Go," he repeated himself and it sounded almost like an order; then, his voice eased a bit. "God knows you need some distraction," he said with a small smile.

London felt embarrassed. It was awkward to have your boss to tell you to "have some distraction", especially when someone just asked her out.

"Alright… I'll stay an extra hour tomorrow, I promise," London said. On the inside, she was smiling like a toddler.

"London, you have more extra hours than this whole hospital staff put together," Chief Pryce said with a roll of his eyes. "I see you tomorrow, when you're cleared to get back on the OR."

This time, London couldn't help. The smile she opened was so huge and she would jump up and down if it wasn't for Steve. She could feel his eyes on her back the whole time.

"Thanks Chief," she whispered happily, and right after he muttered a "You're welcome" in response, she turned her back to him and walked back to where Steve was still standing. Judging by the amused look in his face, he knew what happened during that conversation between her and Dr. Pryce.

"Can you wait twenty minutes?" London asked Steve; she could feel her cheeks slightly blushing and she cursed herself for that.

"I was planning on waiting full ninety minutes," he admitted, making the light pink in London's cheek turn into red.

"I'll be right out," she said after turning her back to Steve and walking towards the locker room. For the first time in centuries, London was a little nervous over something that wasn't surgery, and not the least bit related to work.

. . .


	5. Chapter 5

_Mahalo to everyone who's taking some time to read this story. You are all so incredibly nice. _

**Disclaimer:** _Own nothing but my OCs and the plot..._

**Feedback is highly appreciated!**

* * *

><p>Dinner with Steve proved to be something else. For a military guy, London found herself having a great time and smiling like never before.<p>

They were walking down the beach after they had a nice dinner at a small yet very nice restaurant that Steve knew, and he got to see a side of London that no one ever saw before. She was nothing like the friendly but serious doctor he used to see at the hospital. She seemed to be free and genuinely happy; unlike the content face she always had at the hospital, which Steve knew it was some sort of job requirement, now London had this permanent smile on her face and this one was the real deal.

"I have to admit," she said, bringing Steve back from his thoughts. "I wasn't expecting to have such a great time tonight."

Even though it was dark, Steve could see her perfectly, walking by his side, and the sparkle in her eyes combined with her white smile were even more beautiful than the view of the beach at night.

"Oh, so you thought I was a boring person?" Steve asked faking a hurtful tone. "I am devastated."

He couldn't help but smile; truth was, he didn't expect to have that nice time either. He knew her from the hospital and, even though they got a somewhat closer, that was her work place, she was doing her job and things could be completely different once they were out of there.

And it was different. Better than the two of them were expecting. Nothing felt forced or too awkward, like first dates were - not that they were out on a date; according to some silent yet mutual agreement, they were just hanging out.

"No!" London exclaimed, taking a step to the right and bumping on Steve gently. "That is not what I said!"

"You just said you didn't expect to have fun with me!" Steve said still keeping the act like he was hurt but truthfully, he was enjoying that a lot.

"I'm sorry, let me rephrase that," London said brushing a strand of hair from her face. "I didn't expect to have such nice time hanging out with a military guy."

Steve looked at her, an eyebrow cocked. "I'm assuming that you dated some military guys in the past..."

London almost laughed, but she managed to hold that back. "I did actually. But it's not like I'm the kind of woman who's always after the uniform, because _I am not_." She put such emphasis on those last three words and the look she addressed to Steve just made him smile. "It was more like, how can I say it... I grew up in this world so, it just happened - naturally."

"What do you mean you grew up in this world?" Steve asked genuinely curious.

"I was a military brat," London said with a shrug.

"Wait... a military brat?" Steve said coming to a halt and making London stop with him. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, sir," London said with a smile before sitting on the sand. Steve followed her shortly. "Lived in many different places like a nomad, but, ultimately, I got to spend a big part of my life in Fort Benning."

"Fort Benning? So, you have family in the Army?"

"That is correct. But, to be more precise, my entire family served in the Army," London said staring at the ocean. "My father followed his father's steps and joined the Army. My mother served as well. As expected, my two older brothers chose to continue with the family business and joined the Army too."

"Rangers?" Steve asked looking at London who was now looking back at him. He knew that Fort Benning was the headquarters to the Ranger Training Brigade.

"Well... One of my brothers is a Ranger," she said with a smile.

"Interesting." Being a Navy SEAL himself, Steve was well aware of what it takes to join the Special Operation Forces and, obviously, London wasn't the only talented person in the family. He also respected her not saying everything; in the military, some information is classified and he understood that perfectly. "So, you chose to be a doctor? How did that happen?"

"I wanted to help people. And, even though in the Army we get to do it, I just didn't see myself as part of that," London admitted shyly. "I respect the military and it'll always be a part of me, but... me being a part of the military? I don't know. I never saw that..."

Steve just watched London as she spoke and even though he wasn't exactly a master in the art of reading people's emotions, he could tell there was something else behind that. But he didn't feel like asking about that; they were sort of getting to know each other and prying into her life like that didn't sound appropriate.

"I don't think I need to ask why you chose this life," she said simply while trying to keep her hair out of her face. "It runs in the family too, right?"

"That is correct," Steve said with a short nod. "My father served in the Navy as well before joining HPD."

London knew that she wouldn't get much from Steve about his family, so she decided to just leave it to that. Not everyone have the perfect family and the only reason she knew that was due to personal experience. Maybe someday she would get to know more about that, but today she would just stop talking about that. "So, what do you like to do when you're not deployed?

Steve just gave her a half smile and London found herself smiling back at him. What was it about that Steve McGarrett that she just didn't seem to get tired of?

They spend over an hour talking about all sorts of things, none of those bringing them close to any subjects that were either too personal or too private.

London lost track of time sitting there with Steve. A random thought crossed her mind; turns out Chief Pryce wasn't all wrong and she really could use some distraction.

Chief Pryce. When he crossed her mind, London suddenly remembered to check what time it was, and to her surprise it was late. Like 2am late.

"Holy crap!"

London went from carefree to startled in no time and that caused Steve to sit straight.

"What's wrong?" he asked curiously.

"It's late and I really need to go." London was already standing up followed by Steve who was starting to get a little concerned with the drastic change in her behavior. "My shift starts at 7am and I'm on call tomorrow - today, whatever. I'm sorry..."

"It's okay. There's nothing to be sorry about," Steve said reassuringly. "Come on, I'll drive you home."

London gave him a weak smile. She was really having a lot of fun with Steve and she even considered for a split second to call in sick, but that wouldn't be professional, so she just allowed Steve to drive her back to her apartment.

"Thank you," she said when he killed the engine of his car in front of her building. "This evening was really great."

"I completely agree," Steve replied softly.

Their eyes met and for a moment, none of them said a word.

"Good night, Steven," she said, flashing him a smile.

"Good night, London."

London was about to step out of his truck when she stopped. Then, doing something that was completely unlike her; she turned fairly quickly and placed a soft kiss on his lips. Judging by his expression, he wasn't waiting for that. London then smiled at him and muttering a "_sweet dreams_", she jumped out of his car and walked towards her apartment.

To London, fall asleep that night was quite impossible.

.

All the way back to the base where Steve was still staying, he couldn't stop thinking about three things.

First, how he went from the serious and reserved Navy SEAL to something that he could only tag as "teenager", because he hadn't done things like that since he was fourteen or so. Go to her work place? Ask her out? That carefree behavior was nothing like him. But then again, London was nothing like anyone he met before.

Second, how natural and easy things seemed to happen between them. It was like they instantly clicked and that was something he never experienced before; not with women at least.

And then, the third thing: the kiss. That was so unexpected yet so amazing that Steve had a bit of a hard time wondering if that really happened or he was imagining it. Because, even though he thought about kissing her the entire night, he didn't expect for her to do that.

So, there he was, lying in his bed at almost three in the morning, awake and happy.

When he was informed he would go back to the US, Steve's first reaction wasn't exactly cheerful. He didn't want to leave his men in Iraq and go back. He knew he'd go back at some point, but he rather have stayed and helped them instead of going back; by the time he got to Pearl, he was mad. And when he went to the First Hawaiian Bank to just check his account and the two men announced the assault, he felt angry. There was a war happening and those idiots were robbing people from his Island? Hell, that was infuriating. And when he got shot, he felt even more outraged. How was that possible? To get shot in _Hawaii_? His life was seriously messed up.

But then, something happened. London happened and, right now, even though it was quite selfish and slightly crazy, he was glad that it all happened; otherwise, he would never have met London. And, even though he knew her for a week or so, he wouldn't like to imagine what would be, going through life without meeting that woman.

To Steve, fall asleep that night was quite impossible.

* * *

><p>London's weekend was so incredibly busy. She was on call Saturday and cleared to get into the OR, which was good because the hospital was crazy that day and because she missed that a lot. It was also great because she could keep her mind busy and not wondering what on Earth Steve was thinking about the way their Friday night ended. And as for her Sunday, she slept pretty much the entire day since she had the night shift.<p>

Night shift on Sundays were like witnessing hell breaking lose, first row, meaning London barely had time to breathe.

She was feeling and probably looking like a zombie by the time she got to her apartment the next Monday, at 9am. London's plans for that Monday were: shower and bed. Nothing else. She didn't have to go back to the hospital until Tuesday morning so she would spend the rest of her day in her cozy and comfortable bed. And she had managed to fulfill her "to-do list" and was sleeping like a baby when she heard her phone ringing.

_'Who the hell was the lost soul who would call at this freaking time?'_ was the first thought that occurred to London, even though it was almost 3pm.

"Alexander," she answered it half asleep, half awake. Her voice was husky and not particularly friendly, but it changed drastically when she heard that familiar voice she missed the whole weekend.

_"Hello, stranger."_

"Steve, hi. How are you doing?" Rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands in an attempt to send the haze of sleepiness away.

_"I'm good, thanks. How about you?"_

"Great," she said, forcing herself to sit on her bed.

_"You sure? Respectfully, you don't sound exactly great..."_

London couldn't hold back a chuckle. She sounded that awful? Then she noticed that that was a rhetorical question. "Busy weekend at the hospital, but yes, I'm sure. So, what's up?"

What's up? That was worth a double face palm. But she was still sleepy so she tried to forget that.

_"Not much, I was just wondering if you'll have a day-off any time soon."_

London's brain started to work fast. Day-off wasn't exactly part of her schedule for that week, especially now that she was cleared to operate again.

"Uh- I really don't know... I think maybe next week. Maybe." That was one huge maybe.

_"Okay... Maybe then we could do something?"_

"Sure..." London bit her lower lip. She had a very few dates ever since her first residency, and she never made it to the second. She needed to focus on her career and that's also one of the reasons why she broke up with Nick. London's major priority was her career; anything else was a high second place in her list. But something happened and now she was really looking forward to spend more time with that man. "Are you busy now?" London asked suddenly and felt her heart rate increase significantly.

_"Not really."_

"Well, I'm off until tomorrow and haven't eaten anything the whole day, so, maybe you would like to join me for, uh- breakfast... even though it's almost time for dinner?"

London was a little too nervous, but she relaxed when Steve laughed on the other side.

_"Breakfast for dinner. Yeah, I'd like that."_

"Cool," she said jumping out of bed and running to the bathroom. "You know where I live. Apartment 502, I'll let the doorman know you're coming."

_"502. That was my room in the hospital,"_ Steve observed and London agreed; quite a coincidence. _"I'll be there in twenty."_

Twenty minutes? Well, her place was clean and not messy, but her appearance, on the other hand... "Alright. I'll be waiting."

When London hang up, she stayed a minute just looking at her reflection on the mirror. She looked just the same, but what she had just done, was nothing like her.

.

Just a little over twenty minutes later, London heard a knock on her door.

"Who is it?" she yelled from the kitchen, getting an "It's Steve" not so loud in response.

"It's open!" she said. London heard the door opening and closing and just seconds later, Steve appeared by the door.

"Hey. Sorry my lack of politeness. I'm sort of busy..."

London was making pancakes and it made Steve smirk while leaning against the wall. It's not always that he got to see a cardio surgeon wearing sweatpants, tank top and cooking breakfast at 3:30pm.

"Don't worry," he said clearly amused. "It's all good."

London glanced at him and frowned. She didn't quite get why he was smiling. "What?"

"Nothing... Can I help?" Steve offered politely as he put a box on her island.

"No, thanks... What's that?" London asked indicating the box she just noticed.

"Dessert," he answered. "Or whatever we have after breakfast..."

London looked at Steve; her face was blank.

"You didn't bring that because you thought I'd burn everything, did you?"

Steve wanted to laugh at her comment, but he didn't. She was holding a spoon in a dangerous way. "No, I didn't. I promise."

London just stared at Steve for a while, but then her expression eased. "Alright. So, would you like some blueberry pancakes?"

"Sure," he said with a half smile.

"Great. I'm just finishing here, would you please take these to the table?" London told Steve, indicating some glasses, plates and cutlery that were lying on the island.

"Sure," Steve said and he did as London asked.

Right after he finished, she appeared with a plate with her blueberry pancakes.

"Okay, breakfast is ready," she announced with a cheerful voice and big smile and Steve found that hilarious giving the time. "Would you have a seat, please?"

Once again, Steve obeyed and sat while she served him.

"Enjoy," London said with a smile as she sat by his side.

.

Turns out, London's skills in the kitchen were pretty great. Of course they were just eating pancakes, but they were delicious.

Just like the other night when they went out for dinner, London and Steve had a nice "breakfast".

"You can go watch some TV," she said while finishing doing the dishes. "I'll be right there."

"Sure you don't want my help?"

"No, it's all good. Go."

.

London's living room was a very neat place. It was painted with some sort of pale yellow, there were two sofas, a coffee table in the center, a flat TV hanging on the wall with stereo sound, a shelf with decorative items and photos amongst other things.

It was the photos that draw Steve's attention. Most of them showed men and a woman wearing uniform, standing in front of the American flag - those were probably London's family - but there were a couple of different photos. In one of them, Steve could see London in the middle of two other men that, judging by the similarities between them, he assumed they were her brothers.

"That was when I got into Medical School," she said from somewhere behind Steve. "This picture; it was taken shortly before I left to college." With short steps, she stood by Steve's side. "It was also one of the rare times that we were all together." With her entire family in the Army and London being a surgeon, it was pretty hard for them to make a family reunion or something like it and she felt sad about that.

Even though she was trying to hide, Steve noticed the subtle sadness in her voice. Being part of that world, he knew how tough it could be for the soldier's family.

"Sorry to hear that," he said softly. There wasn't much he could say and he felt a little uncomfortable.

"It's okay. They chose to do that and as long as they're happy, then I'm happy." London gave him a genuine smile that warmed Steve on the inside.

"These are your parents, right?" Steve pointed to the photos of a woman with Asian traces, maybe Japanese, and a man with dark hair and green eyes and, even through a photo, he seemed to be pretty tough, just like any other military men.

"Yes. Major General Matthew Alexander and Lieutenant Colonel Linda Nakamura, United States Army."

Major General and Lieutenant Colonel. That was quite impressive Steve thought to himself. But when he turned to look at London, she had this sad expression that couldn't go unnoticed and he had an idea why she was feeling like that.

"Hey," Steve said placing a hand on her back. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm great," she said, forcing a smile that, even though it was beautiful, it didn't reach her eyes. If anything, Steve noticed they were a little bit wet, like she was holding back some tears. "So, do you like football?"

"I love football," he said, pushing his thoughts and theories aside for a while. He could get back to that later, now, she needed to eat. "Why do you ask?"

"It's Monday Night Football," she announced cheerfully while grabbing the remote and turning the TV on.

"Seriously? You like football?" Steve asked a little shocked.

"I have two brothers," she said, faking an annoyed tone while falling on the sofa. "I grew up blocking, tossing and throwing. NFL was almost sacred."

Steve chuckled and nodded. He did not see that coming, but it was nice. He sat by her side while she changed channels until she found ESPN.

"Hey, I'd like that dessert now if you don't mind," London said turning to look at Steve.

"Sure. I'll get it," he said standing up and walking to her kitchen.

MNF haven't started yet when Steve returned with the mysterious box. "Here," he said handing her some pastries that she had never seen before.

"What are those?" she asked taking one in her hands and taking a bite. London barely heard the answer. "Holy crap these are delicious."

"Pretty good, isn't it?"

"Pretty good?" she said taking one more bite of whatever that was. "This is the best thing I ever tasted in my life."

"I'd agree with you, but I've tried better things," Steve said sitting back on the sofa.

"Seriously?" London sat straight, looking at Steve. "What on Earth can be better than this?"

Steve glanced at the woman in front of him and the curious look in her eyes was so amusing and the way she was sitting on her heels waiting for his answer were more than he could take. Leaning forward, Steve cupped her face with his hands and pulled her for a kiss.

. . .


	6. Chapter 6

_Thanks everyone who has favorited, alerted and special thank you to those who has reviewed this story. Mahalo sailors!  
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**Disclaimer:** _Own nothing but my OCs and the plot - very sad, I know.  
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* * *

><p>It was Tuesday and Steve hasn't heard a word from London since Monday and, honestly, that was something he was not expecting.<p>

They kissed. True. He made the first move. That was also true. But it's not like things got awkward afterwards; if anything, they had a great time watching the Patriots winning another game against the Jets...

.

"Told ya. Totally predictable, dude," she said when the game was over and Steve couldn't not laugh. London Alexander should be the most exquisite and unique woman he ever met - and he met a far few.

"Why are you smirking?" she asked curiously when she turned to look at him. During part of the match, when she wasn't yelling at the TV for something that the dumb, corrupted, blind referee didn't see, she was leaning against his chest watching - not so peacefully - the game.

"Nothing," he said simply. "I'm just... Mesmerized with your commitment and passion towards the game. I can say that the Patriots have one huge fan."

"Oh, nah. I'm not a Patriots fan," she said with a shrug causing Steve to arch his eyebrows.

"Are you sure?" he asked astonished. "Because I was willing to bet anything that you were just a little excited with them."

London chuckled. "Yes, I am sure. I'm not a Patriots fan. I like them, of course, but that's just because my dad and one of my brothers are crazy about them. I'm a Cowboys fan."

"Really? I think it should be interesting to watch a Dallas game with you. I'm wondering if the TV would survive that," Steve said playfully. There was a moment when the referee said the Patriots committed a foul that didn't actually happen and London almost threw the remote at the screen.

"Well, if it happens while I'm out of work then you're invited to come watch it with _moi_," she said with a smile that brightened Steve's life.

"Well, I'm already accepting your invitation," he replied giving her a peck on the lips.

"Cool! I'm looking forward to that," London said cheerfully, but it dropped significantly when she remembered she had to work next morning, 6am.

"Alright then, it's a date - even though we don't actually know the date," Steve said while he stood up. He noticed the change in her expression quickly and knew she needed to get some sleep because she needed to be at the hospital early. "I'll let you rest now," he said while taking small steps to the door. "Have fun saving some lives."

"Have fun doing whatever you do, but take it easy," she said a little too bossy. "Do not push it. Doctor's orders."

"Yes, ma'am," Steve gave her the military hand salute; London responded doing just the same and they both smiled. "Good night," he said softly.

"'night," she replied and leaned to kiss him once again before he walked away.

.

Steve had no idea where that was going. He knew that, as soon as he was declared fit to work, he'd be deployed somewhere, while London would stay in Hawaii, or maybe, she'd go somewhere else to work as a surgeon.

So, when she never spoke to him after that, he was a little bit clueless about what to expect. Odds weren't exactly in his favor, but he still wanted to see her - soon.

* * *

><p>It was approximately 9pm when London checked her watch for the zillionth time. It was Thursday and she still didn't have a chance to talk to Steve.<p>

He called her a few times but whend she couldn't answer it, she was unconscious on her be, at her place. Actually, she just went home to have some hours of sleep then go back straight to the hospital. She was again having one of those weeks at work. Well, there was work but, if London was honest with herself, she would admit that she was also a bit nervous to face Steve, especially after three days of nothing.

But, since her shift was about to end, London was considering whether or not to call Steve. She had just gotten into the locker room, ready to change into normal clothes when a second year resident literally ran through the doors.

"Doctor Alexander!"

"What's going on?" she asked startled, even though she could practically foresee what was gonna happen next because her pager had just went off.

"Car accident. Chief said we need you."

Forgetting everything she was thinking about, London put her phone back into her pocket and ran towards the Emergency Room.

"What do we get?" she asked Chief Pryce and Dr. Nathan Craig, the Trauma surgeon, while wearing the gown Claire handed her and a pair of gloves. The ambulance hadn't arrived yet but it was now a matter of seconds. She could hear the siren and even see the lights.

"There was a car accident involving a car and a truck. Two ambulances are bringing three victims. Since Dr. Weiss isn't here, we need you, Dr. Alexander."

London just nodded. Car vs. truck didn't sound good anytime, but she was ready and focused by the time the first ambulance arrived.

"Male. Middle fifties. Severe trauma to the head, and chest..." The paramedic was still talking about the victim when the second ambulance arrived.

"Dr. Alexander, you handle that," ordered Dr. Craig. "And page Callen!"

"You heard that, Claire," she told the nurse and, just as fast, Claire did that.

Dr. Josh Callen was the neuro attendant. Obviously they'd need a neuro guy because that victim was in bad shape.

"BP is dropping and he's crashing!"

Once again, London found herself jumping on the gurney and starting CPR while two residents took them to a trauma room.

"Claire, where is Callen?" The nurse had just gotten into the room and she didn't have a cheerful expression. "Claire?"

"Dr. Callen is in surgery right now," she told her. "Dr. Larsson is on his way."

"Okay, thank you."

After about two minutes doing CPR, they had a pulse and she could get off the gurney and start examining the patient.

Starting with the chest, first thing London noticed was this huge and deep cut in his chest.

"How did he get this?" asked the resident that ran into the locker room to get her into that case.

"Windshield glass," the paramedic answered. "The car he was driving hit the truck, flipped and landed upside down."

"I need a bag of O negative now!" London ordered. The pulse was getting weaker and weaker and she hasn't even found where it was coming from. He had too many injuries and she was trying to set a plan in her head. Thankfully, Nick ran through the doors at that exact moment.

"Hey, sorry. I was just checking on a patient. What do we get?"

The paramedic explained everything again while London was still busy with the incredible amount of injures he had.

"I need a CT scan. I can't tell the extension of the damage without a view," Nick said shortly after she found out the injury on his chest. "What's the patient's history?"

"We don't know. We're still trying to find out who he is," a resident said.

"Well, then work faster!" Nick shouted and the poor guy ran out of the room, trying to find out if someone knew anything about that guy.

"Crap, his pupils aren't equal. London, we need to get him a CT scan," Nick said exactly when she found where he was bleeding from - there was a small hole in the vena cava.

"Damn! Someone get the portable CT!" London shouted. "You need to be fast," she told Nick. "His vena cava is damaged, meaning we need to get him to the OR damn fast," she told Nick and he nodded.

"Doctor... Doctor Alexander."

"Yes, Claire?" London replied, she was not looking at the Nurse who was standing by the victim's side, cleaning his face.

"You need to see this," she said weakly, and that caused London to look at her, then down to the man. She knew him.

London's world stop for what seemed to be an eternity and she went numb. That was not possible.

.

"Alex? ALEX!" Nick's screams brought her back from her trance and she looked at him; her face wasn't showing any signs of emotions whatsoever. "Do you know this man?" he asked startled.

"Yes," she whispered weakly.

"Well then, who the hell is he?" Nick asked, he was getting a little desperate.

London looked at the man who was lying unconscious on the gurney. She remembered him; she would never forget that face.

"His name... Is John McGarrett," she said finally. The man she was now responsible for was Steve McGarrett's father.

.

"Alex... Do I need to ask someone else to take your place?"

She blinked a couple of times before looking at Nick who was, just like the other resident and Claire, staring at her.

"No. No, that won't be necessary," she said shortly after the intercom rang.

"Doctor Alexander... Alright we're on our way," she said and hang up.

"The CT is set on the OR 5," London announced. "Let's get going, and Claire," she spoke to the woman in a low tone so she was the only one to hear it. "Find out who the other patients are and page Dr. Callen again."

Claire nodded and London rushed to the elevator. "C'mon... Hurry!"

.

London managed to get Mr. McGarrett stable so he could have an image of his brain but he still needed surgery.

By the time he got the CT scan results, Nick noticed London was a lot more startled than the usual.

"Alex..."

"DON'T even think about it," London said quite harshly. She knew she was being a bitch but she just couldn't deal with that right now, not when she had John McGarrett on an OR with his vena cava this close to explode.

Claire walked on the OR that exact same moment and London turned to look at her so fast that it could have hurt her spine.

"So?"

"Paul Newman and Jim Gable," she said and, even though no one knew what on Earth she was talking about, but London knew and she took a deep breath. She was damn relieved. She couldn't possibly wonder what she'd do if Steve was back into that hospital.

"Great," she muttered for herself the same time when the monitors started to go crazy. "Goddamn, he's going into anaphylactic shock! A bag of O negative up now!" London shouted and one of the nurses rushed to do what she was asking. "I need to cut him open. Claire, where's Dr. Callen?"

London willingly ignored Nick who was staring at her, not believing her words.

"He's still operating," she said apologetically.

_Damn!_

"You have my cell phone, call Steve."

Claire nodded and walked out of the room again to make the phone call.

After Claire left the room, London turned to look at Nick Larsson, who was still looking at her with this huge amount of unspoken questions written all over his face, which she knew how to read quite well. "It's not like I don't trust you, Nick. But this guy is the father of a friend of mine and I really don't want to deliver any bad news today."

Nick nodded. It took him a while but he finally realized why she was that startled. McGarrett was the name the woman at the reception desk told her when she was looking for the missing patient.

"Okay... Scalpel," she demanded feeling a little too nervous but she pushed that feeling aside. There was no time for that.

When her hands closed around the thin knife, London said a quick prayer in her head. She could not lose that patient.

* * *

><p>Steve had just returned from a short run and was in the shower when his phone first rang. He wasn't supposed to run, but he needed to do something or he would go crazy.<p>

By the time he left, there were three missing calls and all from the same number - London's. A part of him smiled inwardly when he saw that and he was about to call her back when he saw her name on the screen, indicating an incoming call.

"Hey there."

_"Mr. McGarrett?"_

That was not London's voice. "This is Steve," his voice wasn't that friendly anymore. "Who am I speaking with?"

_"Mr. McGarrett, this is Claire Jennings, I'm a nurse at the Hawaii Medical Center,"_ she said and Steve remembered her. She was the nurse who was always with London at the hospital, she also gave him the clothes and told him when he could find London at the hospital. But her tone of voice wasn't as nice as he remembered. She sounded worried and Steve was starting to worry as well.

"What happened, Claire?"

_"Sir., you should come to the hospital..."_

"Why? Something happened to London?" That was the first thing that popped in his head, after all, she was calling from London's phone and that was never a good thing.

_"She's fine. She's in surgery now bu-"_

"Surgery? What happened? Why she's in surgery?" Steve was already putting his cargo pants and taking the first T-Shirt he could find in his drawer so he could rush to the hospital.

_"No, sir. That's not it. Doctor Alexander is operating on a patient,"_ Claire explained and Steve slowed. Why would she call to tell him that London is working?

"Then why..." Steve was just about to ask why that call was about when Claire spoke again.

_"It's about your father, sir. Mr. John McGarrett."_

Steve's mind went numb and he went speechless. When he heard those words, it was like his world was slowly collapsing.

. . .


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:**_ Mahalo to everyone who's taking some time to read this story. Also, I highly appreciate feedback or constructive critique, so feel free to leave a comment or send me a PM! It's always nice to know what your thoughts are :)  
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* * *

><p>Steve stormed through the doors of the Hawaii Medical Center not twenty minutes after he got the phone call from Claire.<p>

"Where is my father? I'm looking for John McGarrett; I know he's a patient here." Steve could barely keep his voice low and he was not calm in any single way.

"Sir., please just ca-"

"DO NOT ask me to calm down, lady. I got a call telling me to come to this hospital because my father was here and I want to know where the hell he is!"

Even though Steve knew he was yelling at the wrong person, he just could not hold it anymore. It was his father, and he was somewhere in that hospital. He didn't know where because when Claire said that the call was about John McGarrett, he just said he was on his way and that was it. He didn't wait for further information and now he was freaking out.

"Sir. If you please have a seat, I'll find someone to come and talk to you about your father, okay?"

Steve ran his fingers through his short hair. That was a nightmare.

He was pacing on the waiting room or whatever the name of that place was when he decided to call London. Maybe she was already out of surgery, maybe Claire would answer it, in any case, he needed to talk to someone. Not knowing was incredibly awful.

* * *

><p>Claire was just standing next to the intercom when it rang. She didn't wait for a second ring and was about to answer it when London's cell phone rang. She checked the caller ID and saw it was Steve McGarrett.<p>

Crap. She wanted to answer the cell phone but the intercom was priority. "OR 5, Nurse Jennings... Yes... Okay, thank you."

"Doctor Alexander," Claire called her softly, trying to startle her the minimal possible.

"Yes, Jennings," she replied, completely focused on her work.

"It was from the reception. Mr. McGarrett is here," she announced and that made London stop for just a second and check the monitors. Everything was still alright.

"I need you to go talk to him, Claire. Tell him he's being operated, currently stable and as soon as possible someone will talk to him. Go." London told Claire, who responded with a simple "yes, ma'am" and left the OR.

London glanced at everyone at the room before focusing again on what she was doing, which was repairing the damages caused by the accident.

* * *

><p>Steve practically ran towards Claire when she walked out of the swinging doors on the third floor.<p>

The woman at the reception said someone would talk to him and asked him to go to the third floor he knew his father was having surgery. London spoke about the third floor a few times and he knew it had some ORs.

"How is he? How's my father?" he asked Claire before she could say a word.

"Mr. McGarrett, please, have a seat."

"I rather stand," he said simply and waited for her answer.

"Alright," she said, not exactly happy, but she knew that he wouldn't do what she said. If only it was London to do that and not her... "Your father was involved in a car accident and was brought here. He's having surgery now and his status is currently stable."

Steve ran his finger through his hair and rubbed his face with one hand. That was one huge and awful nightmare.

"London is with him, right?" he asked after a few seconds.

"Yes. Doctor Alexander is one of the doctors in the OR," Claire informed and watched his eyes went wide open.

"One of the doctors? How many doctors are there?" Steve was getting more and more nervous by the second.

"There's a team there, Mr. McGarrett. And as soon as possible, someone will come and talk to you, I promise. And now I gotta go back." Claire had said everything she had to say.

"No, wait... Is he gonna be okay?"

Claire looked at the man in front of her and she could practically feel the onslaught of emotions coming from him.

"They're doing the best they can, Mr. McGarrett," she said, trying to sound as confident as it was possible. "I gotta go, but like I said, someone will come to talk to you as soon as possible."

Claire smiled at him reassuringly but that didn't work well to Steve and he just let his body fall on one of those god-forsaken chairs. All he could do now was wait, and pray that everything would be fine.

* * *

><p>"Doctor, you might want to do something." Nick Larsson's calm voice was getting on London's nerves.<p>

"Goddammit, Doctor Larsson, what do you think I'm doing!"

Since the neuro guy got stuck in the longest brain surgery in the history of mankind - at least in London's opinion - Nick Larsson was the one who was operating on John McGarrett's brain. Turns out there was a clot in his brain. Actually, there were two, and even though London wanted to have Dr. Callen to be doing that procedure, what she had was Nick.

And now, along with having Dr. Nicholas Larsson doing a surgery on John McGarrett's brain, she also had to deal with the heart monitor that was going nuts.

As soon as she finished repairing just the vena cava, which was approximately three quarters of all the repairs she had to do, the aorta decided to tear and now, the surgery went from complicated to MacGyver style. That was absolutely terrific.

London managed to fix that quickly, but his heart was giving in.

"Don't do that, sir.," London was talking straight to the man on the table. "Not now, not today... C'mon..."

"Doctor Alexander..."

Nick was just finishing removing the second clot when the heart monitor went flat line.

"I saw that!" London shouted at him. "Turn the clock on and start CPR." A resident did as she said while the anesthetics guy turned the clock that would count the time the patient's heart was out - and London hated that so much. "Bring me the paddles," she ordered and a nurse was already with them around. "Charge 10. Everyone clear. Now."

The heart monitor showed a peak but that was just result of the shock she just gave on his heart.

"Start CPR and charge 20." London waited a few seconds to see if something changed. Nothing. "Everyone clear. Now." Another shock, another peak, another flat line to follow.

"Start CPR and I want one cc of adrenaline," she ordered and Claire was the one to bring the syringe.

"Doctor, what about Steve? Someone was supposed to update him three minutes ago."

Three minutes? London checked the watch and two minutes were gone and the time was running faster than she had ever seen.

"Not now, Claire," she told the nurse who just nodded and took a step back.

"Stop CPR," she ordered and then emptied the content of the syringe on his heart and still nothing. _Damn you, John McGarrett!_ "Charge 20 again. Everyone clear. Now."

Another shock. Another peak. Another excruciating moment hearing the constant beep coming from the heart monitor.

* * *

><p>Six long hours later, London Alexander, Nick Larsson and the entire team left OR 5. They were exhausted. Completely drained, craving for a bed but there was something else to do.<p>

London and Nick stood outside the doors that granted access to the waiting room. There was one lonely figure in there, and he was sleeping.

Checking the watch that was hanging on the wall, directly in front of where the two doctors were standing, London learned it was a little past three in the morning, meaning that Steve was there for about six hours, just as much as she stood in that OR. Unconsciously, London let out a sigh.

"You want me to tell him?" Nick offered kindly, but London immediately declined that shaking her head negatively.

"No. You can go have some rest," she said looking at Nick who looked like a mess. "I'll do it."

"Wait," Nick said holding her by the wrist. "Here, let me just..." He brushed a strand of her hair away from her face. "Okay, that didn't do much difference but anyways... You were amazing in there, Alex," he said placing a kiss on her cheek. "See you later."

"You were great too, Nick... Bye."

London watched as the figure of Nick Larsson walked away, and then, she took a deep breath and walked into the cold room.

.

"Steve..."

London had just sat by his side and reached out to touch him when he woke up startled. "My father, how is he?" She didn't have time to answer his question because Steve was now aware of who was there, and he saw it was not Claire. "London, thank God!" Honestly, if it was Claire once again, even though he was very fond of that nurse, he'd go crazy. "How is he?"

"We just finished his surgery," she said calmly, but that wasn't much of a comfort to Steve. "Steve, I have to tell you that your father's surgery was a little complicated. He went into cardiac arrest on the table... He was gone for a little over two minutes but we managed to bring him back. Now, we'll have to keep him on observation and sedated for the next days because we also had to operate on his brain, but it all went well. If you want to see him, I can take you to the ICU but, like I said, he's sedated."

Steve heard every single word that London said but it took him a while to process all the information and London respected that silence.

She could see in his eyes he was in turmoil. It was definitely a lot to take and, even though she didn't like to tell him all that, London was quite glad she wasn't giving him the "we-did-everything-we-could" speech. That would be one hell of a lot worse.

"I'd like to see him," Steve said finally.

"Alright," she said in agreement. "Let me just check if he's already in the room and I'll take you there."

London didn't like to leave Steve alone, but she had to go check if John McGarrett was already in the room.

.

Steve lost count of how many times someone came to that room to tell him the same old thing. His father was stable; the doctors were doing everything they could, same thing ever since he got there. And, even though he strongly disliked that rehearsed speech, he disliked even more when they walked out, leaving him alone with his thoughts. That was terrible.

And when London walked off, he felt his heart getting smaller in his chest, but he didn't feel angry, this time, he was happy to know that she saved his father. The feeling of his heart being squeezed was just because she left and he didn't even thank her.

About five minutes later, London returned. Steve was pacing all over the room when he heard the sound of the door opening.

"C'mon," she said with her always so soft voice. "Let's go see your father."

Steve went over the door where she was standing, holding it open for him to pass, but he didn't. He stopped right in front of her.

"London I-" Steve's voice failed and London could swear she knew what was coming but didn't interrupt him; she'd seen that many times before to know he needed to do that. "Thank you." Steve's eyes found London's and he just looked at her.

London held his gaze for a while; even though he was a tough man, she could see in his eyes he was a little scared. She didn't blame him or thought less of him for that matter. It's always hard when you get a phone call telling someone you care about got hurt.

"You're welcome," she said with a gentle smile. "Now come on. Visit time is officially over but I pulled some strings and I'll sneak you in," she added with a perky smile, making a ghost of a smile play with Steve's lips for the first time that day.

.

Even though he was with London, Steve couldn't get into the ICU room where his father was. He could see through the window though, and what he saw was quite badly. There were bandages in his head, torso, so many machines connected to his body - not the view he'd like to see to be honest.

The two of them stood there for over ten minutes and, when she looked at Steve, London noticed he wasn't going anywhere.

_"Just like his father,"_ she thought to herself.

When Steve was the one who needed medical assistance, John McGarrett stood in that hospital until his son woke up. He just went home for about a couple of hours everyday, but, other than that, he could always be found at the cafeteria, waiting room, somewhere around. And when she looked at Steve, London knew he was about to do just the same.

"Steve... I know you won't like it but, you need to go home," she said softly and waited for what she knew he'd say.

"I'm not going anywhere."

Like father, like son.

"Steve..."

"I am not going anywhere," he repeated his words a little bit louder and with a tone that didn't inspire any replies. But London couldn't accept that.

"Listen to me," she said turning him to face her. "You need to go home and rest. You need to do it and that's the doctor speaking." London had to be tough, even though that meant they'd have one hell of an argument.

"You're really telling me to leave my father alone? He's my father, London!"

"I know that." London did her best to remain calm even though, as she expected, Steve wasn't taking that very good. "But, honestly, what can you do here?" She waited a second but Steve just stared at her. "See? Nothing. So go. I'll be here and I'll keep both eyes on him. If something happens, I'll call you first thing," she said a little more gently. "Go home, have some rest. You need it."

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose. He knew London was right; he couldn't do much staying there but it didn't felt right to leave his own father alone. Especially when they rarely spend time together.

"Here," she said fishing for something in the pocket of her scrubs. London took a key out of her keychain and handed it to Steve. "It's the key to my apartment," she explained when he just looked at that blankly. "You can stay there; it's less than a block away so you can be here in no time. Take it and go. Now."

London was pretty damn serious and Steve really needed some rest, so he took the key she was offering him without a word; he couldn't think of anything to say.

"Go!" She said kindly. "I'll be here to keep you posted."

Steve looked at her and nodded. He knew he could trust her, after all, she was practically the reason he was there. He opened his mouth to say something but he didn't.

London noticed he was having quite a hard time with that so she just ushered him out of the ward. At that time, that ward was practically dead empty; there were a couple of nurses working the graveyard shift but they were doing something else, thanks to London.

Steve had taken about three steps away from that when he stopped, turned around to look back at her.

London flashed him a smile and, with a wave of her head, she told him to keep walking.

"I promise I got this, Steve... I promise."

Steve didn't hear that because she never spoke those words out loud.

. . .


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:**_ Mahalo to everyone who's reading this. Feedback and/or constructive critique are always very welcome, so feel free to leave a comment or send me a PM! It's always nice to know what your thoughts are _:)

* * *

><p>The following days were very stressful for London. Having another McGarrett as a patient was unnerving and she found herself sleeping at the hospital quite often, even though "sleeping" wasn't an accurate term; she would lie down, close her eyes, allow her mind to relax but not completely - she was always alert.<p>

John McGarrett's surgery went well. She was sure about her work and, according to Doctor Callen, Nick Larsson did great. But she would not be able to rest until he woke up.

The entire hospital could see London was incredibly committed to the welfare that patient, and Chief Pryce noticed that too.

* * *

><p>About three days after John McGarrett's surgery, he was walking through the hospital when he noticed two figures standing in front of an ICU room. McGarrett's room. Even though it was late and the place was relatively dark, Pryce didn't have to look harder to know who those two were; London and Steve.<p>

Checking his watch, he noticed it was past 1 in the morning and visit time was long over. Still, he walked away; he would talk to Doctor Alexander the next day.

.

When London was called to the Chief Office, she had no idea what to expect. She'd done everything she needed to do so that came out as a little surprise. Just a little.

"Doctor Alexander, how is your patient doing?"

She was standing in front of Chief Pryce and she could tell there was something in his eyes and posture that she couldn't say what it was - it looked like disapproval but she couldn't figure out why.

"What patient, sir.?" London had at least three patients at that time.

"Mr. McGarrett," he said looking deep in her eyes.

"He's okay. Stable, according to the last exam, he's healing fine," she explained still a little confused. He knew all that stuff, why was he asking?

"Sure, sure..." Chief Pryce gave her a short nod. "So, would you like to explain why his son was here last night, at 1am, if Mr. McGarrett is alright?"

London swallowed hard. She was so screwed. That would be what? The second time she broke the rules in less than a month? That should be her new record.

"I'm waiting, Doctor Alexander..."

"I'm aware of the fact that it was against the rules to allow Mr. McGarrett's son to see him after visit time..."

"Then why you allowed it, Doctor?"

"Because..." London's voice failed for a brief moment and Chief Pryce didn't let it pass.

"Doctor Alexander, should I reconsider your status as McGarrett's doctor because you have a personal relationship with his son?"

London's jaw dropped open just a little when she heard those words. "Sir., with all due respect, Steve and I are friends and our friendship is not interfering on my work as a doctor."

That was true. Every single part of London's speech was true. The only time London spent with Steve was while he was at the hospital and during the entire time, she was very professional, no one could tell they had a couple of dates – except for the Chief, of course.

"That still doesn't answer my question," Chief Pryce said seriously.

London took a deep breath; she knew why she was doing that and, truth was, even though it has a little to do with Steve, it was mainly because of something else.

"Chief, you were in the Navy, correct?" London asked bluntly.

"Yes, I was, but tha-"

"Then you know this world," London continued, willingly ignoring Chief's words and his astonished face. "You know what it's like and you know that the police work isn't that much different. It takes a lot from a person, but that's okay because they all agreed to it. The reason why I allowed Mr. McGarrett's son to see his father at that time was because he had his duties to fulfill earlier that day, not to mention that Mr. McGarrett is here because he was doing his job. So, I take full responsibility for my acts. I took him to see his father at such late time and I'd do it again; it has nothing to do with the fact that Steve and I are friends. I'd do that even if it was for a complete stranger, because there's nothing worse than having someone you care about being hurt; especially when they're doing their jobs."

London blurted all that without actually pausing for breathing. She knew she had probably crossed the line once again, but she couldn't help it. Even if it wasn't John McGarrett lying on that bed, that case hit too close to home.

Chief Pryce heard her outburst and, judging by the passionate tone she used, he knew that there was more to that than she was saying.

"I think you should take a break, Doctor Alexander," he said when he though she was a little calmer.

"I'm fine, Chief," she said simply.

"London..."

"Is that everything? Because I have to get back to work. I have rounds to do and I'm already late," she interrupted him quite bluntly, but she had enough and didn't need more.

Chief Pryce sighed. London was one goddamned stubborn human being and, even though he was her boss, she wouldn't take that order anytime. He knew that God himself could appear in that hospital, telling her to have a small break, she still wouldn't listen, because it wasn't like London; she didn't like to show weakness. "Alright, you can go," he said waving towards the door. "Just, don't do that again."

London just looked at him before walking out of his office without saying a word. He knew she would do that again if necessary; he just wished that her attitudes didn't result in her being fired or worse.

.

That day, London finished her work and, after talking to the nurses that had taken the night shift, she went home.

Actually, London didn't go straight home. She went for a walk; that day was particularly tough and she really needed some time to clear her mind and unwind. If Steve was still at her place or not, she didn't know. But then again, it was late when she finally got to her place and she didn't go anywhere farther than her living room and kitchen.

London got herself a glass of scotch and let her body fall on the largest sofa. She kept the room immerse in darkness because she really couldn't stand going through all that again. Not again. The talk with the Chief brought back some painful memories and she just didn't want to deal with that again, so, taking one long sip of her drink, she switched from sit to lie down on the couch.

The only things that were on in that room were London's phone and pager, and those were the only things her brain was set to recognize so when someone entered the room, London didn't notice, but she almost jumped out of her skin when a familiar voice spoke right next to her.

"I owe you an apology," Steve said and London sat bolt upright.

"HOLY-" She took her hand to her chest to find her heart pounding beneath her shirt. When she finally worked past the shock, London raised her eyes to look at the man, sitting on her coffee table. "What are you talking about?"

"I heard I cause you a little trouble... at the hospital," Steve said simply and, even though they were sitting in the dark, the light coming from the grass doors of her balcony lightened London's face just enough so Steve could see her shutting her eyes closed.

"How did you... It was Claire, wasn't she?" London looked at Steve; even though she was hidding it, he could see she wasn't happy. "I'm gonna kick her ass tomorrow..."

"Actually, it was Doctor Pryce..." Steve waited for London's reaction, but she just sat there, looking at him blankly. "He told me that you two talked and..." London raised a hand, indicating that she had heard enough. "I'm sorry if I caused you trouble; I didn't me-"

"Stop talking. Please, just... stop," London took the glass that still had a considerable amount of the amber liquid and emptied. Then, she sat back on the couch, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You don't need to apologize," she said after a few seconds, looking at him. London couldn't perfectly see him, but she had his image in her mind so that wasn't really much of a problem. "I don't want you to apologize for something that it's not your fault. I did that. Me. Not you. So don't. Please. Don't."

Steve stayed there, just watching her for about a minute before he left the coffee table to sit by her side. Neither said a word for what they thought it was a long time, until London ended that loud silence.

"I'm not sorry," she said, her eyes fixed on the glass of the door that she just noticed, had raindrops on it. At some point, it started raining. "I don't regret it not even for a second because... because I've been there... things were different, the situation was different, the outcome I can assure you that was different, but I know what it's like to be the one standing on the sideline, without anything, without a word... I know what it's like."

London's words were as steady and firm as jelly. She had no clue why she was doing the exact thing she was avoiding the whole day - reviving ghosts. Because that's what she was doing. Even though she spent the whole day trying to suppress those memories that were haunting her, right now, she was bringing them all back to life. And she was desperately trying to not break down.

Steve wasn't exactly sure what to do. He could feel her body trembling by his side, he could see the onslaught of emotions hitting her hard and making her so vulnerable, but at the same time, she was forcing herself to keep all that at bay and at that moment, that very moment when he could see she was trying to suck it up, he remembered Chief Pryce's words...

_"London Alexander is a great woman. She's tough, brilliant, independent and very strong. But just like everyone, she has her weaknesses. Problem is, she's too proud and too stubborn to let it show. I don't know what's going on with you two and, honestly, I don't want to know. Whatever it is, keep it to yourselves because we really don't need more drama over here. But there's something, and it's distracting her a lot. And I don't know what happens, but she's more receptive with you, Lieutenant. While you were here, I got to see a different side of her. She laughed genuinely and, even though she still spent almost her entire day in this hospital, she was changed. And that's why I'm talking to you. She's better with you, but, lately, something's wrong. Something is not right and I can't make her talk about it... And if she doesn't say, no one can help her. I can't talk to her, Lieutenant... but maybe you can."_

By that time, Steve thought Chief Pryce was overreacting. He didn't get why he was telling him all those things, why he was telling him to talk to her - talk about what? But now, seeing her like that, completely distraught, he knew he was right. Something was really bothering her. But then, Steve wasn't sure what to say. Or do for that matter. But when he saw how she had shut her eyes and was breathing in and out more quickly than the normal, he took her hand on his.

"Do you wanna talk?" he asked poorly, yet, that was the best thing he could think of. "I'm here if you need it..."

"Can we just- not talk? Just for five minutes, can we just stay here, in silence?" asked London tiredly. She was so not in the mood for anything at the moment.

"Sure," Steve agreed. "We can do it."

"Good..."

For over ten minutes, they stood on that sofa, hearing the sound of the thin rain falling outside and watching the raindrops slid down the glass.

At some point, London rested her head on Steve's shoulder so, now, he couldn't say if she was sleeping or not. Just when he thought she was asleep, he heard her soft voice; it was so low that it was like she was whispering.

"Do you remember when I told you that my whole family was in the Army?" she asked while her thumb brushed Steve's hand.

"Yes," he replied simply; his voice matched hers and it was also very low.

"My mother... she is not anymore," she whispered, even before she could continue what she was talking, Steve knew what would be her next words: "She died in combat..."

Hearing her soft and angelical voice saying those words made Steve feel his heart tightening in his chest. He knew that people died during conflicts, but when she said that, that her mother was killed in action, Steve lost his ability to react for a brief moment.

London tried to keep her breathing under control. That's why she let Steve see his dad at such late time; John was hurt while doing his job and that reminded her of her past. Of course that, unlike her mom, Steve's father would survive, but still, it triggered emotions inside her she tried to keep bottled for so long.

"I'm sorry," Steve whispered in her ear while sliding one arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer to him.

London didn't say a word; instead, she just snuggled up to Steve. After almost a week apart, having him so close was so good, calming and his presence alone already made her feel so much better.

The two of them stayed on that couch, holding onto each other for a long time. Moving didn't seem to be an option for any of them - Steve didn't want to let go of London and she didn't even consider that possibility - so they just sat there until, eventually, they fell asleep on each other's arms.

* * *

><p>After seven days in the ICU, London and Nick, along with Dr. Callen and Chief Pryce, decided it wasn't necessary to keep John McGarrett sedated.<p>

They suspended all the sedatives and strong medications; now, all they could do was wait for him to wake up so they could run some exams and test and, eventually, move him to normal room, out of the ICU ward.

.

London was on the OR, doing a Coronary Artery Bypass surgery, this time, assisted by Doctor Callen, when the intercom rang. She ignored that when no one spoke to her; she had someone's life depending on her and she didn't have room for other things other than that surgery in her head. And even afterwards, when she had closed the patient and her job was done, she still had this whole lot of nothingness in her brain.

"Doctor Alexander..."

London was just ditching the mask, gloves and gown and was just cleaning her hands and washing her face when she turned to face the nurse that had called her. "Yes?"

"Doctor Larsson called to inform you that your patient, Mr. John McGarrett, woke up."

A rush of adrenaline took over her body once again. "When?"

"About an hour ago," she replied calmly. "But you were in surgery and he said I should only tell you when you were done."

"Thanks, Laura." Grabbing a couple of paper towels, she ran as fast as she could out of the OR. John McGarrett was awake, and she could only think of one thing now; better yet, one person – Steve.

. . .


	9. Chapter 9

_Thank you to everyone who's still with me. New chapter and I hope you enjoy! Feel encouraged to leave a comment or send a message _:)_  
><em>

* * *

><p>When London got to the nurse station at the ICU ward, she found out that Steve was already in the hospital.<p>

He was waiting for his father to return to his room when he saw London talking to one of the nurses that were working.

"Hey," Steve said when he stood by her side.

"Heey," she replied cheerfully. "I didn't know you were here..."

"Someone called saying that my father woke up."

"Yeah," she said taking the chart that the nurse was handing her; Steve's father had quite a few exams to do, now she needed to find out where he was. Turning to the nurse, she asked her to page Doctor Larsson and find out where he was. "I just heard it myself," she looking back at Steve. "I was a bit busy..."

"Right..."

"Doctor Alexander?" The nurse called her softly; she had someone on the phone. "Doctor Larsson is on his way to get a CT."

"Thank you, Lena," she flashed a smile to the young nurse before turning her attention once again to the man standing by her side. "I'm gonna see how's everything."

"Sure. Okay."

Smiling at Steve, London walked past him, rushing her way to the second floor where, according to the information she just got, Doctor Larsson had taken Mr. McGarrett.

.

"Hey! Look who's here!" Nick greeted London with quite an enthusiasm when she walked through the doors and stood right behind him. "Glad you finally joined us."

"I was a bit busy," she said looking at the screen where images of John's brain were showing. "How's everything so far?"

"Good," Nick said pulling a chair so she could sit. "All results were clean; CT's are perfect until now."

"Good.." There was a relieve showing in her voice and Nick didn't miss that.

"What was that?" he asked squinting at her.

"What was what?" London asked flatly.

"Did you just sigh?" Nick turned to look at London but she had her eyes locked on the screen.

"No, I didn't." Yes, she did. "Can you focus?"

Cocking an eyebrow, Nick glanced at her every now and then, watching her every move. He knew her enough to know she was hiding something...

* * *

><p>"Mr. McGarrett, I think you'll be pleased to know that your tests and exams were all clean," Nick announced when he walked into John McGarrett's room. He had been taken back there after an hours running all sorts of tests and exams. "That means your progress is significantly good."<p>

"Significantly good is a good thing, right?" John asked with this funny look in his eyes.

"It's a great thing," London explained with a small smile. "It means the surgery went well, and your recovering is just as great."

John gave her a half smile and she couldn't not notice that Steve inherited his father's eyes and smile. She was just thinking about that when Steve walked into the room.

"Hey, you're here," he said looking first at London, then acknowledging Nick's presence there as well. "So, how's my father doing?"

London opened her mouth to answer to that question when her pager went off. Changing the words she'd say to an "excuse me", she checked her pager and noticed it was a 911 from the ER.

"I have to answer this," she said apologetically looking at everyone. "Would you care to explain it again, Doctor Larsson?"

"No problem," he said and muttering a _thank you_ and a couple of _I'm sorry_'s, London rushed out of the room, on her way to the ER.

"Looks like someone's in trouble," John said after a few seconds while everyone was still staring at the door.

"It's been a busy day," Nick said turning his attention back to John and his son. "And Doctor Alexander is being very required, as always."

"Doctor Alexander... She was the doctor who operated on you," he said, talking to Steve.

Nick glanced at the two men talking. He knew what they were talking about and John was right. London was indeed the surgeon responsible for that man standing by his father's bed.

"Yes, that was her," Steve said nodding in agreement.

"She's also the one who did your surgery, sir.," Nick said and John turned his attention to him. "Doctor Alexander is most likely the main responsible for you being here today," he said a little softer. He knew no one had explained Mr. McGarrett senior what happened during his surgery. And he was hoping that London was the one to tell him all that, but he was there and she was not, so...

"What do you mean?" John asked, shifting on his bed.

Taking a deep breath, Nick Larsson explained everything that happened ever since he was brought into the Hawaii Medical Center until today, when he woke up.

* * *

><p>London spent the rest of that day and night working her ass off. When she was paged earlier, she knew something big happened - she just didn't expect for something like that.<p>

There was an accident. Two school bus, full of children were involved in an accident. They divers were taking the kids from school, back to their houses when one of them lost its break and hit the other right in the middle, then fell down. So many kids injured and she found herself scheduled to do about four surgeries in a row so far.

London didn't have room for any other thoughts in her head except for those children, so, by the time they had it all fixed, no more victims or anything, the only thing she could think of was getting a hot shower and passing out on the first soft thing she could find; it could be a bed, a sofa, even a fluffy rug, she didn't mind. She just needed to close her eyes and sleep. That was all. So much that London didn't even consider the possibility of stopping by to check on Steve's father. She was drained.

.

When London woke up the next day, she felt a bit better. After ten full hours of sleep, it was supposed she'd feel brand new, but she'd be taking double shift, not to mention she would have to stay at the ER that night.

It was 5:30pm when she got out of bed. Her shift would start at 6pm and she wouldn't leave that place until midnight of the next day. But, when she remembered that her patient, Mr. John McGarrett was awake and he was healing just fine, London felt a lot lighter.

* * *

><p>It took her about three days for London finally find Mr. McGarrett senior awake or free. Every other day she stopped by, he was either sleeping or having some friends visiting him and she never felt like disturbing him. It wasn't like she had something urgent, on the other hand, there was nothing urgent about him. Apparently, Steve's strength was also thanks to his father.<p>

"Hello," London said cheerfully when she entered his room. "How are you doing today?"

It was around 6am and Steve wasn't there.

"Great," he replied, his enthusiasm matched London's and it made her smile. "How about you?"

"Oh, I'm brilliant," she said taking his chart and checking on his progress. It says Dr. Larsson had requested some scans for that day so they could evaluate when he would be able to be discharged. "And how was your night? Did you sleep well, sir.?" Putting it back on its place, London turned her attention to the patient.

"It was good, thanks for asking," he said kindly. "How about yours?"

Taking her stethoscope, London starting her usual procedure. Listening to his heart first, then, lungs.

"Busy," she answered when she finished with his heart. He had strong heartbeats and no unusual sound. That was great news. "I've been working ever since yesterday so my night was quite interesting," she said with a smile. "Could you, please, lean forward for me? Thank you."

"I'm guessing that your boyfriend doesn't like your job that much, does he?" he said when London placed the cold instrument on his back.

"Would you take a deep breath for me... I don't really have a boyfriend," she answered, feeling a little bit sad while voicing that. It was true though. Ever since the other night when she fell asleep on Steve's arms on her couch, London rarely meet John's son. She was always busy and he had his father and he was also working with Naval Intelligence at Pearl, so they didn't have much time together. She didn't even heard from Steve himself he was working; the only reason she knew he was Naval Intelligence was because one night she slipped his name while talking to one of her brothers, and, the next day, he called her, giving her full background on Lieutenant Steven J. McGarrett.

London yelled at Hunter, her brother, for doing that, but she calmed down afterwards. Especially when she knew he was working at Pearl and not at some other place.

"How on Earth someone like you doesn't have a boyfriend?" John said, turning to look at her when she moved from his left to his right lung.

"I have a tight schedule; it's pretty hard to find someone willing to accept that... Can you take another deep breath for me, please? Thank you."

"If I'm allowed to speak freely, it's everyone's loss," he said and London smiled amused. It was just as easy to talk to John as it was with Steve.

His lungs were clean. Everything was completely normal, nothing unusual, but London wrote on his chart, requesting a chest scan. She wanted to see how her work was doing. Even though she didn't think there would be anything wrong, she didn't want to take any chances.

"Mr. McGarrett, you have some exams scheduled for today, so I'll see you later, in the mean time, rest."

London was still standing by his bed when a voice coming from the door made her turn her attention from John to his son.

"Rest. You love saying that, don't you?" Steve said with a defiant look in his eyes. It was the first time in about two days that she got to see him again, and that made her smile. Big.

"And you love not respecting that, don't you?" she replied, just as defiantly as Steve. There weren't any hints of tension in that room. On the contrary, there mood there was pretty light.

"What can I say, I'm not very fond of boundaries." He finally left his place by the door and stood by his father, directly in front of London.

"Please, be a better patient than your son and behave? I'll go crazy if I have to deal with that again," London said looking at John. He had been looking from Steve to London then back to Steve but neither noticed that.

"I'll try my best," he said half smiling. London shook her head negatively when she noticed the two McGarretts were half smiling at her. "So, I was told you saved our lives," John spoke after a few seconds when London had taken a step towards the door. "Steve's and mine..."

London stopped. She knew someone would tell him about his surgery sooner or later. "I guess one could say so," she replied shyly. She wasn't the kind of doctor who would keep scores. It wasn't like her.

"I guess you're like, our guardian angel or something," he said and it made London blush.

"I think I'm something," she said softly. "I think I was just the right person, at the right place, in the right time. Most definitely I am not an angel but I'm glad I was there and could help."

Like always, her pager went off and she had to excuse herself out.

"She's a good girl," John said after she left.

"Crushing on the doctor, dad?" Steve asked as humorous as his serious nature allowed.

"Oh, I wouldn't stand a chance," John said waving that comment off. "Especially when I'm competing with my own son."

Steve cocked an eyebrow at his father, but he didn't argue with that. Maybe he should because what came next sort of left him speechless.

"I knew it," John said leaning back on his bed and closing his eyes, leaving a quiet Steve, with his eyebrows arched, standing by his bed.

.

London had just left McGarrett's room when she saw Nick Larsson, and, judging by his fast steps, he was paged as well.

"So," he said when they got to the elevator. "Steve McGarrett, huh..."

London frowned while glancing at him. "What?"

"C'mon... You know what," he said amused when the elevator's door went open. "You're different and now I know why..."

"Let's go, we've got work to do," she said hurrying to the ER.

"I knew it," Nick whispered while following her lead.

* * *

><p>Seventeen teen days after his surgery, John McGarrett was discharged from the Hawaii Medical Center. And then, about three days later, London got a phone call from Steve.<p>

_"London?"_

"Oh well, hello there stranger," she said rather cheerfully. It was her day off so she wasn't doing anything, and that phone call was probably the best thing that happened to her in a very long while. Due to their busy days, they hardly have some free time, and that made London notice how badly she missed him. "How are you doing?"

_"Great, how about you?"_

"Fantastic, thank you very much." She knew that Steve couldn't see her, but she felt silly when she noticed the huge smile on her face.

_"So, what are the chances of you being available tonight?"_

London was a bit surprised with that question; the last time they spoke, it was a rather short and a bit odd talk because she was at the hospital and he was working, so she was a little unused to that side of Steve - lately, she saw him a lot like her own family, all strict and serious, just like any other military guy.

"I'd say the chances are fairly good," she replied nervously, starting to pace around her apartment. London had no clue why she was that restless, but she couldn't help. "Why do you ask?"

_"Well, it's Sunday and Cowboys vs. Bears will be on..."_ Steve said wandering and London smile grew bigger - he didn't forget. _"It won't be exactly a date since I'm now at my father's house and he'll make some steaks, but we could watch it together... What do you think?"_

It took her a moment to get a grip on her emotions. London was beyond happy; she never felt like that, but she was thrilled. "I think that's a great idea," she said after a while.

_"Great,"_ Steve said and she could feel the relieve in his voice. _"That's... really nice. I'll pick you up at five, is that okay with you?"_

London checked her inseparable watch and learned it was 4:03pm. She'd have about an hour to get ready, it should be enough. "Sure!"

_"Okay. See you later..."_

"Bye."

As soon as she hung up, London took just a moment to inhale deeply, and then she ran to the shower.

.

About forty minutes later, London was ready. She was wearing a white tank top with a blue star in the middle, in honor to her team, a pair of jeans and flats. Normally she's put her Cowboys uniform and a pair of shorts but that didn't seem appropriate, after all, according to Steve, his father would be there.

It surprised her now nervous she was when she checked her watch and saw it was 4:57pm. She never get that nervous. Not even if she had to perform a heart transplant and the victim was borderline. Yet, she felt butterflies and, when she heard her phone beeping, her stomach just disappeared.

It was a text from Steve. It says "I'm already here."

There it was. Taking a deep breath to calm down, London grabbed her purse and walked out of her place. The elevator ride wasn't exactly relaxing, but when she stepped out of the building and found Steve leaning against the dark sedan she already knew, she felt her body relax and her lips opened into a small smile as she moved towards him.

"You look great," he said sliding his hands around her wais and pulling her close. It was like no time had passed and it was just yesterday when he was at her place, watching the NFL.

"Thanks," she replied with a childlike smile. "You're not bad yourself."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Steve said leaning to place a soft kiss on her lips.

The way he just held her and kissed her was so natural that London tossed her purse into his car through the window, cupped his face with her hands and pulled him into a real kiss.

She had him pressed against his car, her body practically glued to his as their tongues were exploring each others mouth avidly. It was like they knew one another since always; their moved in synchrony, their bodies seemed to fit, they had chemistry.

Eventually, they pulled apart, their lungs grasping for air.

"I think we should go," London said taking a small step backwards and her whole body and mind protested. "I mean... We don't want to worry your father."

"Right," Steve said and London noticed he was as unhappy as she was. "Let's go," he said opening the door for London, then running around his car to jump behind the steering wheel.

Turning to look at her, Steve flashed her a killer smile that made her heart skip a beat before he put his car back on the road and on its way to his house. London's mind wandered back to the day where Nick grilled her about Steve. She denied it to him, but she couldn't fool herself - she had a thing for Steve. A huge thing.

.

"Dad! We're here!" Steve announced when he walked inside his place and London felt her cheeks getting warm. It felt so weird to hold hands with Steve while walking into his place. "DAD!"

Steve didn't get any answers from his father. "Please, make yourself at home," he told London shortly after climbing the stairs to look for his father on the first floor.

London let her purse fall on the couch and, when she turned around to have a better look of that house, she noticed a small piece of folded paper lying next to the phone. It had Steve's name written on it.

"Steve! There's something with your name down here," she said a little louder so he could hear it.

He didn't answer right away and that gave her some time to look around. That place was dead empty. His father wasn't there.

"What is it?" he asked while coming downstairs again.

London took the paper and handed him; she didn't read it, but she had a fairly good idea of what was written on it. She took a few steps away from Steve and her eyes landed on the table. It was set. Two places.

"He's gone," Steve said flatly and London turned to look at him.

"What do you mean, he's gone?" she asked cautiously. That was the kind of expression that could easily be interpreted wrongly.

"He left. It says here that he went visiting a friend..."

That took a weight off London's shoulders. She was a doctor so the first thought that occurred to her was that he had gone back to the hospital.

"I think..." London said her hands pointing to something he wasn't seeing. "Maybe your father set us up."

Steve frowned and, with long steps, he stood by her side; his eyes landed on the table and the wine and he couldn't help but chuckle.

"We've being set up..." Steve said through his teeth and it made London laugh quietly. "What are you laughing at?" he asked looking at her curiously.

"I'm sorry, but... It's funny."

"You're enjoying this. You are so enjoying this, aren't you?" he said pulling her closer to him, locking his arms on her back.

"I'm enjoying the fact that your dad did this and you have this funny look on your face," she replied sliding her arms around his neck. "I must say, that is not the kind of reaction I'd expect from, well, someone like you..."

Steve cocked an eyebrow. "What do you mean someone like me?"

London bit her lower lip. That would be awkward... "I mean from a Naval Intelligence guy," she said cautiously. And when she notice his frown was growing bigger, London slid her hands from his neck to his chest. "It is possible that I might have slipped your name while talking to my brother one of these days and he might have wanted to be sure you weren't some sort of bad guy..."

Steve heard that and he was more than just a little surprised. "Your brother ran background check on me?"

"I didn't ask for it!" London said defensively. "I just mentioned you and he did it. I swear I had nothing to do with it."

Steve was still curious about all that. "How exactly my name come out in a conversation between you and your brother?" That was the question that was intriguing him the most.

Now, London was damn nervous. Why on Earth she mentioned that? That was so stupid... "Well, he asked how everything was, I said it was fine. He asked if I was dating, I said no. He inquired me about my ex, I said he was still an ex and then he said I sounded different, like when I was seeing this guy and I told him to drop it, but he wouldn't so eventually, I said I met someone and he was nice and he kept asking and asking so I said your name." London said all that so fast and without stopping to breath that Steve's eyes widened a little but she never noticed it because she was looking anywhere but Steve. She was a little too scared of what would be his reaction. "I'm sorry... I swear I did-"

She was in the middle of her sentence when she felt a finger pressing her lips so she stopped talking. Then, she raised her eyes to meet his. They were so deep blue that she swallowed hard. _Man, he was so mesmerizing..._

"So, you met someone," he said with a half smile and London was a little puzzled. Was he joking? Screwing with her head or what? "And he's nice... And you even talked about him to your brother."

London opened and closed her mouth, but nothing came out of it. She didn't get his reaction, and that was not how she thought it would go...

"That's nice," he said tightening his embrace around London.

"Wait… Aren't you like, mad because my brother went through your entire life thus far?"

Steve grinned. "Honestly, I was at first, but I think I should expect something like that in case someone of your family found out about me… I mean, if I was your brother, or your father, I know I'd run background on whoever you're with."

London felt her heart skipping a beat and she finally smiled. "You're something," she said pressing her body closer to his.

"Something nice, right?" Steve asked perkily.

"No… something better," she said. Her hands went to his neck and she pulled him for a kiss. That man was definitely the best thing she ever had, if she could say such thing.

. . .


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:**_ -ery06 first of all, thank you for being so nice and reviewing! And no, I'm not studying medicine. It was one of my dreams, but that's just it - a dream. Yet, I'm very passionate about it, so that's probably why I'm exploring it a lot. And thanks for your kindness! I very much appreciate it _:)_  
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_Thank you to everyone who's still with me. New chapter and I hope you enjoy! Feel encouraged to leave a comment or send a message _:)_  
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><p>"So," Steve said after they had dinner and were now sitting on his couch, waiting for the game start. "Your ex-boyfriend went through all this again, I mean, he had his background checked by your brother as well?"<p>

London laughed easily and put the glass of wine she had in her hand on his coffee table. "Well, yeah," she said leaning forward and kissing him softly. "I'm the youngest of three children so I guess my brothers are a little overprotective... You're not that special, Lieutenant."

Steve arched an eyebrow and pulled her to him. "Oh really, _Doctor_?"

London smirked at him shortly before she ran her fingers through his hair. "Really," she whispered; her lips were only inches away from Steve's and her breath was tickling his.

"You are a terrible liar. Terrible," he said leaning forward to capture her lips with his and feel London melting on top of him.

Steve's arms traveled all the way up and down her back and he felt like he was dreaming. Her soft skin, the scent of her shampoo mixed with her natural perfume, the sweetness of her tongue playing with his - that was all heavenly. And he could tell it because he'd been to hell or something pretty close to that when he went to Iraq. That woman in his arms, she was his personal piece of Heaven. London was that special.

"So," he said when they had to pull apart, thanks to their protesting lungs. "Your ex... He had your brothers' approval, right? Are they friends?"

London cocked an eyebrow at Steve. "Why the sudden interest regarding my ex?" she asked curiously, while placing her arms on his chest so she could look at him. "He's my EX."

"Yeah, thank God for that," Steve said brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear. "But, your brother still asks about him, so I'm curious..."

London stared at him dubiously; she had no idea where that talk would get them, but she wasn't exactly excited to find out. "Yeah... I think, my family was quite fond of my ex..."

"Was he from the military?" Steve asked and, even though London was still clueless about that, she didn't think he was asking that because he was either jealous or insecure - none of those things fit Steve. She was fairly sure he was just curious, but his curiosity was sort of bothering her.

"No... He was from my class, in medical school," she said with suspicious eyes.

"Oh, college. I should've guessed that..."

Squinting at him, London slid to an empty spot on the couch, not exactly away from Steve, but most definitely not on top of him. "Okay. What's this all about?"

"Nothing," he said sitting straight and close to her. "I was just trying to find out if I'm in trouble or if I'm safe..."

"In trouble or safe concerned what? Is this some sort of code you use at work that I'm most definitely not familiar with?" London asked puzzled. "Because I'm not following."

"Not a code," Steve said, not hiding his amusement. London was so beautiful with that confused expression and sitting on the couch with her legs crossed. "I was just wondering what I'd have to go through in case I ever met someone from your family..."

London's confused look vanished, giving place to a small smile. "And? You think you're safe or screwed?"

"Still pondering." Steve grabbed her by the waist and, with one move, he had her beneath him, with her back on the couch. Then, he kissed her neck and it made London burst into laughter.

"Okay, stop. Stop!" She pushed him a little. "Cherry! Cherries!"

"What the hell is cherry?" Steve asked, looking at London quite confused.

"That's my safe word," she said smirking and Steve raised an eyebrow.

"Safe word? Since when you have a safe word?"

"Since now," London replied with a bright smile on her face and Steve couldn't stop thinking how he got so lucky in his life.

Ever since his mother died, he became a different person. He changed into a serious and strict man and after he joined the Navy, those traits were seriously magnified. And it never ceased to amaze him how that woman always made him forget all the seriousness and just relax. She made a different and sort of forgotten part of him to return and it was so effortless, he had no idea how could do that, he was clueless how such thing was possible.

.

As Steve was already expecting, they didn't watch the game cuddling on the couch. On the contrary. He was a quarterback when he was in High School and he knew that Football could be serious business to some people. London was definitely part of that.

But, even so, they had quite a great time. Every time they cut to commercials or they had a break, she went from wild to soft in no time. Steve found that quite hilarious; it was like he was with two different women.

When the game was over - and, to her delight, her boys won - London turned to face Steve, who was just watching her. Her lips cracked into a smile as she snuggled up to him.

"You think I'm crazy, don't you?"

"Me? Noo... Yes, I do. But I kinda like it," Steve said brushing her cheeks with his thumbs.

"You _kinda_ like it?" she said with a smile. "That's cool... I kinda like it that you kinda like it."

Steve chuckled. How could she do that? He wasn't exactly a smiley guy, but whenever he was around her, he just couldn't help.

"A penny for your thoughts?" London said when she noticed Steve's thoughtful expression. Placing her hands with her finger entwined on his chest, she rested her chin on top of it while looking at him. He looked so gorgeous and it made London wonder how many women were sighing over that man right now.

"I was just thinking about... Time," Steve replied a little elusive. That was something he had been wondering for a while now.

London didn't ask him to elaborate that, she just kept her eyes on Steve's. She had a fairly good idea what he was talking about; she just thought she was the only one with that kind of thought in mind.

It's been a little over a month since she met Steve during that crazy day. At first, she thought Chief Pryce was sort of punishing her, not allowing her on the OR and to keep an eye on her patient. But, when the days passed, London started to forget about the no OR thing and she just focused on the man that caused that to happen, and she liked it; it was like the punishment wasn't that bad. It was incredibly nice to be around Steve and, by the time he was discharged - and she wasn't there - she started to miss him, miss his company. And now, that feeling didn't shrink. Au contraire... She found herself looking forward to the next free time she'd have way more often. Because then she would be able to call him and maybe he would be free as well and they could do something. Together.

But things weren't that easy. Steve was now working again and sometimes, more often than they liked, their schedules didn't match and that was always a huge disappointment on London.

She knew things between them weren't exactly promising. He was a sailor, meaning he would have to leave sooner or later, and then what? Wait?

"Let's not think about that, okay?" she said softly, her hands rubbing his chest.

London didn't want to think about that. She knew she could go through the waiting part, after all, she lived like that practically her entire life. When it wasn't her father, it was her mother and, eventually, her brothers. That waiting was part of her life, she was used to that. But it should be different if it was about Steve, right? I mean, he wasn't her family, he wasn't exactly her boyfriend... but she cared about him a lot, and that changed the whole scenario.

"Alright," Steve said taking her hands in his. London held her breath unconsciously when he did that; she wouldn't admit it out loud, but she felt like her number one priority was starting to lose its strength, and when Steve drove her back to her place, they agreed to make an effort to not wait for another month so they could hang out.

* * *

><p>Two days later, on a gray Tuesday, London and Steve had made plans for lunch, at 1pm. It was just noon when her phone rang while she had finished her rounds and was checking the charts on the nurse station. London thought it could be Steve, but when she checked the caller ID, it was from an unknown number.<p>

"Alexander," she answered it, never stopping her work.

_"Hi... Do I need to book an appointment to talk to you, **Doctor**?"_

London dropped her pen. She didn't recognize the number, but that voice, she would recognize that voice even if they didn't speak for fifty years or more. "Not you, soldier."

_"Good."_

"So, how are you doing?" she asked leaning against the counter; her work was the last thing in her mind. "It's been what? Four months? It's really good to hear from you, Nate."

_"Something like that,"_ he replied simply. _"It's delightful to talk to you again, little sis..."_

London opened a smile. It's been an eternity since she last saw Nathan Alexander, her brother. "So, what's up?" she asked, her voice choked with emotions. "How are you doing?"

_"I'm doing good. A bit tired but I'm good. How about you?"_

"I'm great. Still in Hawaii, finishing my residency. Everything's fine."

"Good... Uh, listen, I got something for you and I was told it was delivered today... I hope you like it."

London frowned. What on Earth he could have for her? Nate was in Afghanistan, and it wasn't like he had time to go out shopping. "What is it?"

_"You'll see when you get home,"_ he said and London could almost see his smiling face. Nate knew that she was the most curious person he ever met and he always liked to tease her.

"I hate you, Nathan," she said playfully. She didn't hate him, she would never hate him. He was her brother and she loved him more than anything in the world.

_"I love you too, Paris."_ London had to hold her breath. Ever since they were kids, Nate called her Paris instead of London. He said, since her parents decided to name her after a city, it should've been Paris, not London.

"I really miss you, Nate..."

_"Miss you too, London. I'm so sorry, but I gotta go. Talk to you soon, okay."_

"kay..."

_"Bye."_

London didn't respond to that, and when Nate ended that phone call, she still held her phone for a couple of seconds. The onslaught of emotions that came crashing on her was only too much.

.

"Chief Pryce?" London knocked on his door and waited for him to take his eyes off of his huge pile of paper. She doubted she'd ever manage to be Chief of anything - too much paperwork, and that wasn't for her.

"Yes?" When he looked up, he saw something he had never seen before. London seemed to be in distress; truly and deeply in distress.

"I'd like to take the rest of the day off, if you don't mind."

That was also something he had never seen before in his life.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, really concerned.

"Everything's fine, sir." That was a lie, but there was no need for her to tell that to her boss. And he knew better than to wait for a real answer.

"Alright. You can go," he said with a nod. "But I'd like to ask you to keep your pager on, just in case."

London nodded shortly before walking away. She would never turn her pager off, even though she really needed some time by herself.

.

Unlike that other night when she needed to unwind so she went for a walk, today, London went straight home. Her thoughts were somewhere else entirely different, but her legs knew the way so they led her to her building.

Just as blindly as she got there, she made to her apartment door. London had her eyes on the floor and, when she walked into her place and leaned against the closed door with her eyes shut, she didn't notice there was someone in there.

"How is it that I was the one in a war zone and you look a hell of a lot worse than me?"

Her eyes snapped open and there he was. Nathan Alexander. Her brother. Standing in the middle of her living room.

London went shocked. Her brain still didn't process that, even though he was there, walking to her direction.

"Wha... How...?"

"Surprise," he said with a smile. "So, you like it?"

Throwing her hands around his neck, London closed the space between the two of them with a hug. "I loved it!" They remained holding onto each other for over a minute when London finally let go of Nate and pushed him a bit father from her so she could look in his eyes. She didn't need to say anything; Nate knew what she had in mind.

"I have a three days leave," he said when her dark eyes fixed on his. "I thought it would be a great idea to visit my sister for a couple of days, after all, she lives in Hawaii, and that's a lot better than Fort Benning."

London smiled big. "Oh, I love how you only remember me because of where I am," she said humorous while walking to her sofa.

Nate smiled at London. "That, and also... I heard from Hunter that you're dating a Navy guy, so I thought I should stop by and meet him," he said and London rolled her eyes.

"Sweet Jesus have mercy... Seriously? My life is now something that you and Hunter talk about when you have time to chat?"

"No... It's something that Hunter, **dad** and I talk about when **we** have time to chat."

"You people need to get a life. All of you," she said faking and annoyed tone. But Nate's words reminded her of her lunch plans and, well, she would have to call Steve...

.

Steve was just leaving the base and on his way to his house when his phone rang. It was London.

"Hey you."

_"Hi there, are you busy?"_

"Not at all, I'm going home now, why?" he asked; he was already in his car, driving quite fast through the streets of Oahu.

_"It's about our lunch,"_ she said and Steve noticed she was a little too nervous.

"What about it? Are you having some MacGyver surgery or something? Because we can do it later if you can't leave at one."

_"No... I'm not having any surgeries, but... Would you mind if I take a rain check on it?"_

Hearing that made Steve frown. "No, I wouldn't," he answered after a brief moment. "But, can I ask why?"

_"My brother is here. Well, one of them... He had a three days leave and came to visit me."_

"Oh. That's great news!" Being in the military, he knew how it should be to both London and her brother. He was a little frustrated for that rain check, but he was happy for her. During the time Steve spend with London, he got to know that she really missed her family and he had a fairly good idea how she was feeling right now.

_"Best news ever,"_ she said cheerfully.

"Okay, so... Have fun! We'll talk later..."

Steve was about to hang up, just waiting for her goodbye, but it didn't come._ "Wait!"_ she said a little louder so Steve's attention was now focused on that phone call. _"Look, you don't have to accept it, but... Would you like to have lunch with us?"_

He went mute for a while his brain was working. London's brother just came from his deployment, and Steve really didn't feel like getting in the middle of something so familiar.

"Well, I'd love to, but I don-" Steve was about to politely decline London's offer when he was interrupted. By a man.

_"C'mon... We insist." _That should be London's brother. Steve was just wondering what to say when London was back. _"Sorry about that, Nate took the phone out of my hand... But so, what do you say?"_

It took him a couple of seconds to reach a settlement. "I'll be there in a few."

_"Really?"_ London said that so surprised that it made Steve and Nate chuckle. _"I mean... Really?"_

"Really. I mean, this is my golden opportunity to see if I'm safe or screwed, how could I decline that? Besides... You insisted."

_"Fair enough," _she replied calmly._ "We'll be waiting... Oh, and prepared to be grilled."_

Steve laughed quietly. "Will do. See you in a few."

London knew his father, Steve had just agreed to meet part of her family - does that mean they were dating?

* * *

><p>As Steve was expecting, lunch with Nathan was a very different experience.<p>

In his 28 years of life, Steve never actually met a girl's family. He had some dates, but things never got that serious, or far. For instance, he didn't go to his prom; his father sent him away when he was fifteen and, finishing school somewhere completely new wasn't exactly easy, especially to someone who lost its mother recently. After finishing School, he enlisted and, while that was a great opportunity to meet women, Steve was more focused on graduating in Annapolis so he could live his life in the Navy.

But now, there he was. Even though Nathan was just her brother - not the eldest, for what's worth it - Steve felt like he was doing quite a good job with interrogating him.

Nathan was Steve's age, and, as they learned throughout that lunch, they had some things in common. Just like Steve, Nathan seemed to be very protective regarding people he cared about; at first sight, Nate seemed to be younger and one could wrongly interpret that as a sign that he wasn't the most serious person in the world, but Steve learned that he was, not only a very serious person, but he was also very strict, mature and he inspired respect just with his posture.

"So, why Navy?" Nate asked, making London roll her eyes as her head fell on her hand.

"Oh, for crying out loud, Nathan. That's enough. Seriously."

Since Steve arrived at her place, Nate didn't stop asking him this awful lot of questions. And he wouldn't stop not even when they were having lunch.

"No, it's okay," Steve said, flashing London a smile. "I choose Navy for the same reason you choose Army. My father was in the Navy, just like my grandfather before him. It was an easy decision."

"Carry out with the family legacy," Nate said simply. "That's honorable."

Steve nodded. Meeting London's brother wasn't that bad.

.

To London's surprise, Nate and Steve sort of clicked. Somehow, after Nate's never ending questions, London watched as Steve and her brother just talked about things like football and differences and similarities between the Navy and the Army - things that, in London's experience, were as neutral as the weather.

"You know what? I had quite a great time," Steve said when he was about to leave. It was already 5pm, meaning he had spent quite a long time at her place.

"Well, I'm glad that someone had some fun," she said a little sarcastically, but she was mostly amused.

Steve smiled. He knew that he and Nate sort of put London aside every now and then, but they really didn't mean to. "I'm sorry," he said pulling London for a hug.

"Nah," she said, waving that off. "It's okay. I invited you, right? And I must admit, at first I thought we'd have an awkward lunch but turns out it was nice. I had a great time too." London cupped Steve's face and pulled him for a kiss.

Their lips had barely touched when they heard Nate clearing his throat somewhere behind them. London glared at him, but Nate just held his child-like smile on his face.

"I gotta go," Steve said, trying not to laugh with London's reaction. "I'm sure that you and your brother have a lot to talk, so... See you later, okay?"

London pouted like a child and that made Steve's laugh show up. "Okay," she said smiling at him and kissing him softly.

"Hey, Steven!" Steve was about to walk away when Nate called him from the inside. Stopping on his tracks, Steve turned to look at him; he was now standing by London's side, holding her by the waist. "You're safe, man..."

Steve frowned; then, looking at London, he saw her blank expression and he knew that, somehow, Nate heard about the "safe or screwed" dilemma.

Smiling at both, he turned his back to the two Alexander's and he heard when Nate let out an _"ouch!"_ and he just knew that London had punched him when her voice followed saying _"what is the matter with you? I'm gonna ship you back to Georgia, so you can enjoy your three days leave in Fort Benning with dad..."_.

. . .


	11. Chapter 11

_Thank you to everyone who's still with me, taking some time to read this story. Hope you all enjoy!_

_ Feel encouraged to tell me what your thoughts are thus far; I'd love if you leave a comment or PM moi _;)_  
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><p>The next day, London decided so she would call the hospital and tell the Chief she wasn't coming; she never did such thing, but she was willing to do it so she could stay with her brother. She thought that Chief Pryce would yell at her from here to Sunday, but when she explained her reasons, he accepted that very nicely to be honest. Nate would go back to Fort Benning that night, so she wanted to spend as much time as she could with him.<p>

If it was possible, London would say that the whole universe was conspiring against her because, in a blink of an eye, she found herself at the Honolulu International Airport, having to say goodbye to her brother.

"I'm already missing you, Nate." London's voice wasn't louder than a whisper and she was holding onto her brother for dear life.

She knew he had to go and she hated saying goodbye, but she wouldn't give him that much of a hard time. London knew why he was doing that, and she respected it so very much. But just because she understood and respected, that never made things any easier. Never.

"Me too, sis..."

Nate pulled London even closer to him and they stood still, like they depended on that embrace to stand tall and survive, like they were each other's support and London found herself struggling to not lose it in front of her brother. She knew that was hard for him as well and she didn't want to make things even worse.

"I love you," she whispered after what could have been a minute or an hour, but, to London, it passed way too fast. She could feel his strong heartbeats on her own skin; his heart was pounding just as much as hers so she knew he was feeling the same.

"You know I love you too."

London pulled Nate apart just a little bit so she could look at him. Unlike London, Nate had these beautiful blue eyes that he inherited from their grandfather. He was the only one between the three siblings with those magnificent eyes. She had to blink a couple of times to avoid a tear to fall from her eyes.

"Look, I know things are tough over there, but... Please, don't wait for another four months to call me, okay?"

When Nate placed a loving kiss on her forehead, London couldn't hold it and a couple of tears fell from her dark onyx eyes.

"I'll do my best, I promise."

London wrapped her arms around his waist as his hands stroked her back. She didn't want to say goodbye. Not again. She wanted to ask him to stay, don't take that plane, but she didn't. Instead, she buried her face on his chest and she let the tears soak his white T-Shirt.

Nate would have a few more hours in Georgia before going back to Afghanistan, but to London, it was like he was going straight to that place. That war zone. And that thought would keep her from sleeping for the next ten days or more, like it always did.

"I need you to come back to me, Nate..." she whispered against his chest, and, even though her voice was barely audible, Nate knew what she was saying. She was his sister and they've been through that before.

Nate didn't say a word for a moment. He knew that that wasn't a promise he could make like that, because he couldn't disappoint her. "I'll try my best, Lon, like I always did for you," he said kissing her hair. Nate noticed his vision was starting to get blurry and his breathing was starting to get heavier and, when something came down his eyes and fell on London's dark hair, he knew he was crying.

Steve offered to drive them to the airport and he suddenly felt weird. Seeing London and Nathan like that, their bodies tangled and the emotions taking over both Alexanders was something that got him speechless. He could only wonder how many times London had to do that, how many times she had to say goodbye and, inevitably, he thought about what he was about to do with her. Steve knew he would have to leave sooner or later; he was working with the Naval Intelligence, but he was a SEAL, and whenever they needed him out there, he would have to go.

Nate's flight was announced through the speakers and London could almost hear the 'crack' coming from her chest, where her heart was supposed to be.

"Take care out there, will you," London said and there was another 'crack' when she had to break the hug. But her hands found Nate's and she entwined her fingers with his and squeezed it hard. She couldn't loose contact with him. "Do it for me..."

"I will, sis. I promise."

Nick brushed a tear that was falling, but when he did that, a few more tears followed and there was this glistening trail on her face. She hated herself for being so weak when she should be strong.

Then, the female voice announced Nate's flight again and London had to bite her lip to avoid another river to flow from her eyes.

"Call me when your plane land in Atlanta," she pleaded looking deep in Nate's blue eyes.

"Yes, ma'am," he said, giving her a standard military hand salute but with a huge smile and, even though London was on the verge of tears, she smiled back. "I'll call as soon as I get to Atlanta, then I'll call back so you and dad can argue over your SEAL boyfriend," Nate said indicating Steve with his eyes.

London slapped him on the arm softly. "Oh, for God's sake, will you stop saying that? Steve is not my boyfriend, we're just... getting to know each other," she said rather calmly, even though she didn't like voicing that. She liked Steve, but if they were together like that, well, she couldn't tell – and she sort of didn't want to ask, afraid what the answer might be. "AND you, Hunter _and dad_ need to get a life. Tell them I said it... And call me. Or I'll sure haunt your ass if you don't," London said and Nate brushed a strand of hair from her face.

"I'm sure you will," he said pulling her for a last hug and he kissed her on the cheeks.

London had to swallow hard to not give in and ask him to stay. "Be safe, Nate"

He pulled her slightly away from him. "Sure thing, miss," Nate said. Then, he turned to Steve, who was standing like a statuesque a few steps behind ever since they got there. "Hey, SEAL!" Nate said a bit louder and Steve walking towards them. "It was nice meeting you."

"It was my pleasure," Steve replied offering Nate a hand. London's brother took it, but he pulled Steve for a hug.

"You know... She likes you," Nate said quietly so London couldn't hear it. "God knows why but she likes you. A lot."

Steve took his words silently as he patted on Nate's back. "Now seriously, you're not screwed. Even though you're a SEAL," Nate added when they pulled apart and Steve smiled.

"I'm glad to hear that, even though you're a Ranger," he said humorously. That clearly broke some of the ice and they shared a moment of laughter.

"You two," Nate said turning to look at London as well. "Behave, alright."

"Have a nice flight," Steve said with a half smile.

Nate nodded, but when he looked at London, the heartbreaking expression he knew perfectly was there, and it hit him hard.

"I'll call you as soon as the plane land, I promise."

Pressing her lips together tightly, London nodded. Her ability to speak was compromised; if she opened her mouth, she wouldn't say anything, she would just cry.

"Love you so much, _Paris_," Nate said cupping her face with his hands and kissing his forehead. London didn't resist and hugged him one last time. She let go fairly quickly because the woman announced the last call to Nate's flight.

"Love you too," she whispered while trying to hold the urge to avoid his departure.

Nate blew a kiss to London shortly before he walked through the doors and disappearing from her view and that was the last it. The last crack on her chest and she felt like her heart was broken to pieces.

Steve was watching London in case she broke up, but it never happened. After Nate went to board on his plane, London just stood there, quiet. She didn't cry endless tears or anything like that - she just became silent.

London had been through that before. She had seen people coming and leaving practically her entire life and she knew how badly it hurt. It was awful. But, this time something was different; Steve was there and, even though she just said goodbye to her brother, there was someone there to hold her if she needed. Turning to look at him, she noticed he was watching her carefully like she was made of glass and was about to break.

"Let's go," she said softly as her hands found his.

Steve noticed the not to subtle hints of sadness in her voice, face and whole body; he didn't take her hand in his, instead, he slid an arm around her waist and, pulling her closer to him, he walked back to where he had parked his car. The view of London with tear in her eyes never left Steve's mind.

.

Steve walked London to her apartment. They barely spoke while he was driving her back and he didn't like that. He was used to the talkative London and the mute version of her wasn't warming him up one bit.

"Thank you for coming with me - us tonight," she said when they stopped in front of her door.

Steve looked at her and he took the keys of her hand and opened the door to her. "You don't need thank me," he said ushering her inside and closing the door. "Because I'm not going anywhere."

London just watched as Steve wrapped an arm around her wais and guided her to her bedroom.

"You need to rest," he said calmly when they walked through the doors and London freezed. She didn't want to rest; she was exhausted and knew she would have to work tomorrow night but she just couldn't sleep. Whenever she closed her eyes, the most horrible thoughts popped on her head and she felt like it was hard to breathe.

Steve noticed that so he brought London closer and closed his arms around her, in a tight embrace. "I can't sleep," she whispered against his chest. "When I close my eyes I see horrible things and, even though I know these are just my imagination, they seem very real."

Steve didn't say anything. He didn't know if there was something he could say to make things just a little bit better, so he just combed her hair with his fingers while placing gentle kisses on the top of her head.

"Would you stay with me?" she asked shyly, looking up to meet his eyes. "Please?"

"You didn't even have to ask," Steve replied, leaning to kiss her soft lips; it tasted slightly salty, like tears.

London didn't even bother changing, she just took Steve by the hand and, kicking her shoes somewhere, she crawled into bed with Steve and she snuggled closer to him, feeling his heartbeats under her fingertips, his breathing caressing her hair as his hands rubbed her arms and back gently. It took her over an hour, but eventually, she gave in to the tiredness. It was about 3pm when London fell asleep; Steve stayed up a little more, just watching her.

* * *

><p>London woke up before 7am with the sound of her phone ringing. She didn't get much sleep that night, but that didn't matter when she heart her ringtone coming from somewhere close to her ear.<p>

Steve woke up instantly when London sat bolt-upright and grabbed her phone; before it could ring three times, she had it practically glued to her ear.

"Hello?"

Rubbing his eyes in an attempt to get rid of the sleepiness that was still clouding his vision, Steve sat by London's side and watched as her face that was twisted with worry softened as she took a deep breath. It was definitely her brother, and he decided to give them some space so, kissing her softly on the cheeks, he got out of bed and walked to the kitchen to get him a glass of water.

Standing in that quiet and empty kitchen, Steve couldn't not think about what he saw last night. Was it right what he was doing to her? Was if fair to put London through all that stress again? God… that was something that he just couldn't stop thinking about...

.

Steve stood there in the kitchen for about three minutes or so and he was willing to stay there for a little longer when London walked in the room.

"There you are," she said kindly; the talk with her brother certainly caused an effect on London's mood. Steve could see she was a little less startled but she was still worried. "Something's bothering you?" she asked cautiously while, on a second thought, she leaned against the doorframe.

Steve wasn't the only one who knew how to read people and London could see something was going on in his head.

"It's nothing," he said waving her question off. "I just thought I should give you some privacy... You know."

London studied him carefully; she knew he wasn't telling everything and, to be honest, she had a few things in mind.

"You sure?" she insisted taking a few steps, closing the space between the two of them. "You seem... Distracted."

Having her so close, at arms reach, made Steve consider all those thoughts again. He wanted to hold her. He could see in her eyes she was more than a little scared, but he couldn't erase from his head the image of her suffering at the airport, and London was so beautiful and lovely and he cared about her so much that, even though he wanted to be with her, he didn't want to cause her pain.

"I was... thinking," Steve started to say something but stopped, making London tilt her head to the right and look at him with curious eyes. _Oh my... She's so beautiful..._

"About...?" London asked taking one very small step forward and invading Steve's personal space.

"About you... me... everything..."

London's eyes widened with surprise. "And is it that awful? Because, judging by the looks on your face, I'd say you're about to puke, pass out or something," she said playfully, trying to lighten the mood that was quite thick.

"No," he said quickly. "It's not awful. No... It's... I don't want to hurt you." Steve's arms closed around her waist as he spoke those words.

"Because you'll leave eventually," London said, more like thinking out loud, but when she raised her eyes, black met blues and she knew that she had nailed it. "I thought we had an agreement and we wouldn't think about it," she said placing both hands in his chest.

"That's a bit hard after last night's events," he said truthfully, making London sigh.

"Look, Steve, from the beginning you came clean about who you are and I sure knew what that meant and I accepted that. So that's it. Stop thinking about it, okay? I'll be just fine," she said cupping his face with her hands and brushing his cheeks with her thumbs. "I know I'll handle it. I always did."

Even though London was smiling at him, Steve didn't feel exactly cheered up. "Exactly," he said taking her hands in his. "You always did. I don't want to add more to that."

"Steve, I choose this," she said raising their hands so it was in front of his eyes. "I know what awaits me. It'll hurt? Sure, most definitely. But I choose it. And I don't regret it, not for a second... Do you?"

Steve had his eyes locked on hers and he watched as her beautiful face twisted with doubt. And it hit him. Hard.

"No, I don't," he said pulling her close since she had taken a step back. "I don't regret anything, I jus-"

"Then don't." London said pressing a finger to his lip. "Stop thinking about it... You're making me suffer in anticipation and it'll make me age faster."

Steve chuckled for the first time as he held her hands with a little more strength. "You still look beautiful to me," he said and she smiled. Shortly before she yawned. "And tired... You should go back to bed," Steve said when London rested her head on his chest.

"No, we should," she said releasing her hands from Steve's so she could pull him into a tight embrace. "You gotta work in a couple of hour; I say we both go back to bed."

London's voice was a mix of sleepiness and seduction that Steve couldn't do anything but smile. "Oh, how can I say no to that offer," he said walking back to her bedroom with London entangled with him. And when they got to her king sized bed, it didn't take over five minutes and London and Steve were sleeping, holding onto each other as if their lives depended on that touch, as peaceful as they could be.

* * *

><p>Apparently, the conversation with London in her kitchen worked. Sort of. Steve never forgot how devastated London was when he took her and Nate to the airport, but he also noticed that she knew how to cope with that.<p>

She was right. She definitely could handle that. But every now and then, especially when he was on his way back home after working at Pearl, he wondered if he wasn't doing the wrong thing, adding more drama to her life... But when she called him and he heard her soft and sweet voice talking to him, those thoughts disappeared.

Nate's visit - and departure - worked like a wake-up call to London. She knew that Steve would be deployed to God knows where at some point and she also knew that, when that happened, they wouldn't have time to talk every day, maybe they'd have to communicate via letters or something like it, they wouldn't even see each other in a very long time (she didn't even want to consider the possibility of never seeing him again)... So, after that, she tried her best and a little further than that to spend as much time with Steve as it was possible, without suffocating him, of course. And Steve did just the same.

When London didn't have to work the night shift, she and Steve would go out, sometimes they stayed at one's place, but they always spend that time together; they even had lunch every now and then, at the hospital cafeteria when she was too busy, or at some restaurant when she had a full hour of break. And when London was stuck at the hospital, working graveyard shift, she would call Steve, or Steve would call her and they did make it work.

So much that, not too long after Nate left, the whole hospital already knew about their relationship and they didn't mind. They were happy.

But, as it was expected, that happiness didn't last long...

Approximately three months after Steve was discharged from the Hawaii Medical Center by Doctor Pryce, he was working, Naval Intelligence, when someone answered the intercom and announced that Lieutenant Steve McGarrett was being called by his Commanding Officer.

That call solely brought up some suspicious red flags to his mind and, when he knocked on the door of his CO's office, walked inside and saw four familiar faces - his SEAL friends -, he knew his time in Hawaii was over.

. . .


	12. Chapter 12

_Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter.__ I'm glad to know you're enjoying this story! New chapter and feel encouraged to leave a comment or PM me when you finish it!  
><em>

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><p>Steve walked out of his CO's office and out of the base about two hours later feeling a ton heavier. He and the other four SEALs had an assignment; they wouldn't go back to Iraq, instead, they would go to Prague, which was the last place where Victor Hesse, an international arms dealer and terrorist with connection with the Japanese mafia, had been sight.<p>

According to the profile they had on Hesse, it should be one long mission; Victor had a brother, Anton, and they were two very elusive criminals with great ability to vanish. During the past year, he had been spotted in Berlin, Dubai, Kyiv and a few other places. Needless to say that, thus far, no one was able to get the Hesse brothers. So, the SEALs were called. And Steve McGarrett was part of the team that had the mission to track them down.

.

Steve was discharged of his duties for the rest of the day; he appreciated that greatly because his head was spinning.

He knew that London would be working until noon and it was just 10:17am but he ignored that fact and went straight to the hospital where he knew she would be working with the Trauma attendant that day. Steve's phone had died and he just hoped she wasn't in an OR.

"Hi. Doctor Alexander, please," he told one of the women at the ER. Steve couldn't tell the difference if she was a nurse or a doctor. "It's important."

The woman didn't ask for identification; just like the entire hospital, she knew who he was, so she just asked him to have a seat that she'd find her.

Steve didn't sit. He waited impatiently while the woman tried to find London in that huge hospital.

.

London was finishing a surgery assisted by Doctor Craig when the intercom rang. She was about to start closing when the nurse who answered it called her name.

"Doctor Alexander, Mr. McGarrett is here," she said, making London look up to find the attendant's calm eyes. "He says it's important."

London didn't say or do anything. She was fully concentrated on her job, but she also knew that Steve wouldn't show up like that if he didn't have a damn good reason to do so. But, looking from Dr. Craig to the patient, London just said a very calm "okay, thanks" as she started to close the patient's abdomen. Dr. Craig and London were in that OR for about seven hours now and she wouldn't walk away, not when they were just closing the guy.

"Nice job, Alexander," Dr. Craig said when she finished her work very beautifully, about three minutes after that phone call. "You were great in there."

"Thank you, sir," she replied with a half smile while washing her hands. Now that she had finished her job, she couldn't stop thinking about Steve.

London was drained by the time the surgery ended; she was operating since three in the morning and that was exhausting but when she heard that Steve was there, she pushed that aside and, just stopping to change her scrubs, London walked as fast as she could to meet with him.

She had just walked into the ER and, to London's surprise, Steve was still wearing his Navy uniform.

"Steve." London placed a hand on Steve's shoulder. He didn't see her coming since he had his back to the door that she had just walked through; he turned rather quickly and London saw in his eyes that something wasn't right. "Hey... What's going on?"

"I know this is not how it works but, uh- I need you to come home with me."

Steve's request was as unexpected as the downright serious and stern tone he used and those things combined made London frown. Real big.

She checked her phone to see what time it was and she still had a little over ninety minutes before her shift ended.

"Could yo-"

London was about to ask him to wait a little, but when she looked up, he was gone. Looking around, she found Steve a few steps away, with Chief Pryce. And, judging by their constant glances, they were talking about her.

She had taken a few steps, intending to join them, but they did the same and they met halfway.

"You can go, Doctor Alexander." Chief Pryce spoke before she could even think about opening her mouth. Looking from the Chief then to Steve, London could just wonder what happened; what they talked about. Her mouth was hanging slightly open but Chief Pryce didn't let her say anything. "Go."

London's eyes fixed on Steve's and she saw urgency.

"Alright," she said still stunned. "I just... wait here," she told Steve before turning on her heels and walking incredibly fast to the locker room.

Changing to her normal clothes in record time, London rushed back to where she left Steve and the Chief, but this time, Steve was alone.

"Hey," she whispered, placing a hand on his back; he was facing the door like he couldn't wait to get out of there.

"Hey, come on, let's go." Taking her hand in his, Steve started walking quite fast outside.

.

The ride to the McGarrett's house was filled with this long and unnerving silence. London tried to ask about his day so far and things that she assumed to be neutral but she only got short answers so, eventually, she gave up and waited; sooner or later, he would talk.

Steve killed the engine of his car on the driveway and, taking just a moment to breathe, he stepped out of the vehicle; London followed him shortly.

The silence didn't fade and they reached the front door with that awkward silence on top of them like this thick blanket. London was starting to panic on the inside when she felt Steve's hand on her waist; she turned to look at him and, before she could ask him what was happening because she was staring to freak out, his lips captured hers on a deep and passionate kiss.

London's mind went blank and every single one of her thoughts vanished. She could never think straight when Steve did that; closing his arms around her waist, pulling her so close that it was almost like they were defying the laws of physics, his marvelous scent numbing her senses as their tongues engaged into a sinful yet irresistible tango. Much like the dance, their kiss was passionate and sensual, dramatic and aggressive but, over all, London could feel the not so subtle hints of sadness, and that's when she pushed him kindly.

They stood there, their arms still keeping them close, their foreheads resting against each other's as they allowed the air to flow into their lungs.

"Steve... What's wrong?" London's voice wasn't louder than a whisper, but, to Steve, it was like she was screaming at the top of her lungs, exactly like his thoughts.

When she saw him running his tongue through his swollen lips, having a little bit of a hard time to speak, London connected the dots.

"You're leaving," she whispered, unconsciously holding her breath after voicing that.

Hearing those words, even though they were coming from her mouth, made London crumble on the inside. She knew it was inevitable but there was always that little and annoying hope that maybe, just maybe...

"Hey, beautiful," Steve said, tipping her head up so he could look in her eyes. They were incredibly dark and deep, more than anything he had ever seen; if anything, it was almost like when Nathan left, but there was something else that Steve couldn't identify. "I'll be ba-"

Before he could finish his sentence, London's lips came crashing on his as her hands locked around his neck.

London didn't want to hear anything anymore. Her brain was still working on the fact that Steve was being deployed and she didn't even know where he was going. She couldn't think about anything that would slightly remind her of the fact that that man was leaving. She couldn't handle that.

Steve didn't push her away either. He needed her close to him for as long as he could have it. Without letting go of London, he fumbled with the keys, trying to open the front door. London noticed that and, taking it from his hands, she just pushed the thin object in the lock and with a quick click, a small pull, and the door went wide open.

"You're good with your hands," Steve said; his lips still pressed against London's.

"So I've been told," she replied while he held her by the waist and walked with her inside. "Wait," she said a little startled as she drew her head farther from Steve's.

Their minds were working on the same level because, before she could say anything, Steve brought her head closer to his and after stealing a kiss from her now very red and swollen lips, he told her no one was home.

London couldn't tell how she felt. There was this conflict of emotions going on in her mind and body - she was furious, sad, turned on, everything at the same time. She wanted to yell at the entire universe for that, she wanted to cry her eyes out every time she remembered what was bound to happen, she wanted Steve.

Her whole world was spinning around, she felt like there was no ground under her feet she noticed that Steve had her in his arms and they were walking fast up the stairs, to Steve's bedroom.

* * *

><p>"When?" London didn't want to talk about his departure - not now, not ever - but there was only one thing she needed to know, and that was it: when.<p>

"Tomorrow morning, six hundred hours," Steve answered weakly.

They were lying in his bed; London resting not exactly peacefully on his chest as Steve's fingers were running up and down her bare back. There were no clothes, no sheets, no nothing between them, but it still wasn't proximity enough.

London glanced at the clock on his nightstand to learn that they had spent the last four hours locked in that room. They were tired, but not as much as they were sad.

"Fifteen hours," she whispered as Steve's fingers ran through her dark hair. To London, that was too soon, but she had seen enough to know she could consider herself lucky. She had seen her brother getting his mission and having only a couple of hours to be at the airport. Of course it was the Army, but still, she knew that, sometimes, they didn't have that much time.

Against their will, London and Steve allowed some little space between them and they finally left his room to have lunch. Neither was hungry, but they had to eat, it was a necessity.

.

London never went back to her house; Steve wouldn't let her and she didn't want to be an inch away from him.

They were sitting quietly in Steve's lanai when John McGarrett returned around 7pm. The first thing he noticed was the quietness. He had seen Steve's car on the driveway but there was nothing inside that would tell someone was there. Until he saw the two figures outside. At first he thought it could be just one, but when he took a couple of steps in that direction, he noticed that it was Steve and London and they were entangled into a tight embrace.

John didn't go there; he already knew about Steve's deployment and he knew they needed that time.

* * *

><p>That night, London had as much sleep as an owl. She had stayed at Steve's place and, regardless of any efforts, she couldn't sleep, not even when she looked at Steve and noticed he was asleep. He seemed a little bit in distress but he still was the most wonderful man she had ever put her eyes on.<p>

London felt a tear running down her cheeks so she brushed that away rather quickly, not wanting to wake him up. He would have to wake up in a few hours and London would allow him to rest for that time. She needed to have some sleep as well since she would work that morning, but she couldn't close her eyes and lose that view.

When Steve's alarm clock rang at 4:45am, he rolled in his bed to find it cold and empty.

"London?" His eyes scanned the room to find her sitting on the armchair that he had in front of his bed.

"Morning sunshine." London was hugging her legs and she seemed tired, but she said those words so softly, lovingly and with a small smile that Steve almost ignored the black marks underneath her beautiful eyes.

"Morning beautiful," he said sitting on the bed. "Come here."

Steve had his arms open and London didn't think twice before leaving the armchair where she had been sitting for the past couple of hours or so and snuggled up to his warm body.

"Did you have any sleep?" he asked softly as he brushed a strand of hair from her face.

"No," she admitted when Steve tipped her head up and she took advantage of that and kissed him full on the lips.

"You just sat there? The whole night?" Steve raised an eyebrow and London felt her heart growing smaller on her chest.

"Not the whole night... Just for a couple of hours."

His blue eyes were locked on hers and when her breathing became heavier and her heart rate started to increase, she knew she was getting closer to the edge in a fast speed.

.

Around 5:30am, London found herself leaving Steve's car, along with Steve himself and John McGarrett. There it was. _Six hundred hours_. It couldn't have come faster.

Struggling to keep her pace steady, just like her breathing and heartbeats, London held onto Steve's hands like it was that grip that was keeping her up and not gravity.

"Come here," Steve said when they stood in front of the huge plane that would take him away; London didn't have the guts to ask where he was going. If his destination was Iraq again, she wouldn't bear it. Her mother died in Iraq a few years back.

He took her a couple of steps away from the crowd. She could see other four men wearing the same uniform and she recognized them by their patch - they were all SEALs.

"Hey, look at me." London didn't do as Steve said so he cupped her face with his hands, forcing her to look at him.

Steve's heart skipped a beat when he saw the turmoil caused by the onslaught on her emotions. She looked so small, tiny and so fragile, the complete opposite of what she normally was and that made Steve hate himself for doing that to her.

London was numbed, like she had put her life on hold so she could get through that. That's how she always managed to live through her numerous goodbyes. She learned that trick after the third time she had to do that.

When she first did it, she was just a little girl, just seven years old, and she saw her father leaving. The following weeks and months were hell for her; her daddy wasn't there and when she saw a bunch of caskets wrapped on an American flag, she lost it. Not even her mother telling her that her daddy wasn't there made her stop crying, and when her father spoke with her on the phone, she still didn't believe he was alive; it was only when she saw him, about nine months later that she stopped mourning.

Her mother's deployment was the second. She left only a few months after her father returned and, again, she crumbled.

When she was to say goodbye for the first time to her older brother, Hunter, London was kind of used to that. Kind of. She was eleven and, even though she cried herself to sleep days, weeks after he left, she learned to manage it. And numbing was her solution. But Steve didn't know it. And when she looked in his eyes and saw how that was hurting him, she slid her arms around his wais and smiled at him. A crooked smile but still a smile.

"I'll be fine, sailor," she whispered before kissing him softly.

Steve brushed her cheeks; unnecessary to say he didn't believe her words right away. She looked in so much distress and it was hitting him hard.

"I'm sorry," he whispered when he let go of her face so he could pull her closer to him.

"If you don't mind, I'm not," London replied calmly. "And I wish you weren't either."

Steve loosened his arms just enough so he could look her in the eyes. He had his eyebrows furrowed while she had this unusual peaceful expression.

"I know what you're thinking," she said softly. "You're hurting me and you're sorry for causing it... But, in my life, I learned that you say you're sorry if you regret something. And if you were in my place, if you could see what I see, if you could feel what I feel, you would know that, even though it hurts, it's still the best thing ever. And I don't regret it not even for a split second." London smiled at him as she ran her fingertips from his temper to his chin. "It is only painful now because it was great. Actually, it was more than great. And, if you don't mind... I'm not sorry for hurting you. I'm sure you thinking _"What a selfish bitch!"_ but, right now, I'm choosing to hold onto the good times, the good memories... So, I'm not sorry, and I wish you weren't."

Steve listened to every single word that she said, feeling a mix of sadness and happiness. He was happy for having her in his arms and would never regret anything that happened between them, but he was miserable because he'd have to leave her... He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay. He wanted to stay with London.

"Then I'm not," Steve said shortly before leaning to kiss her. "And I wouldn't think you're a '_selfish bitch_'. Not now and not ever."

Their lips met and, at some point, the sweetness of his kiss was mixed with something salty. Only when they rested their foreheads together, London noticed she had some tears in her eyes.

Steve brushed them away and tipped her head up so she could look at him. They were lost in each other's eyes for quite a long time until London remembered where they were, and that she wasn't the only one there with Steve. Checking her watch, she noticed it was almost time for him to get on board.

"Here," she said taking her silver necklace out. It had a ring on it; it was a diamond ring that London got from her parents when she turned sixteen. After she got into Medical School, she only wore it around her neck; she had to take it off quite often and, because she didn't want to lose it, she put it on a necklace. "I want you to keep this," she said putting it in his hands and closing it on a fist. He stared at her but, before he could protest, she added: "you can return it to me when we meet again."

With that, London took his free hand in hers and walked back to the small crowd that was standing by the plane and she stopped next to Steve's father.

London took one small step back while Steve and John said their goodbyes silently. Watching them was like watching her own family. Whenever Nathan or Hunter was to be deployed, it was just the same. They would hold their father but no one would actually say a word. London never understood why that ceremony but that's also how she learned to be, so she smiled weakly while looking at Steve and John hugging. She instantly remembered Nate, who had gone to Afghanistan about two months ago. That thought made her mood drop significantly but she held it together; she needed to.

When Steve turned to London again, she watched as he put the necklace on. It was so out of place, a diamond ring with his Navy uniform didn't seem to fit but he held it and she smiled.

"I don't have anything for you, but I'll keep it safe," he said taking one step closer to where she was standing. "Until we meet again."

"I'm sure you will," she said with a smile. "And you don't have to give me anything... I'll hold you in my heart, until I can hold you in my arms."

He was just looking at her, trying to figure out how to say what his whole whole body and soul was screaming when he heard his name being called by his Commanding Officer.

"Good luck, sailor," London said, giving him the standard military hand salute. It was like a habit that she had and she just couldn't help it.

"Thank you, soldier," Steve replied, doing the same gesture and that made her smile as a tear fell, leaving a glowing path where it ran. "I'll miss you."

"I'm already missing you," she admitted.

"London... Uh- I wanted you to know that... I... I-"

"I know," she said placing her right hand on his left cheek. "And in case you haven't noticed yet... Me too."

Steve felt there was something in his chest and it was causing physical pain to his heart. That woman was his personal heaven.

London leaned forward for one last kiss before he was called again. She always knew that day would come but it felt so incredibly wrong, totally unfair... And when he stopped in the middle of the stairs and looked at her, she couldn't hold it anymore - the wall that was holding back her tears tumbled down. And when the door of the airplane closed behind Steve, she found herself crying, copiously yet quietly, while Steve's father guided her back to his car.

. . .


	13. Chapter 13

_Thank you to everyone who's still with me. New chapter is here and I'm ending the whole "background" story, 'trip to the past' thing so I can move forward and into the future. I hope you enjoy and feel encouraged to leave a comment or send a message _:)

_Kisses and hugs to_ **SugarMuffin08** _(On a side note, I highly recommend you all to check her stories - they're awesome)_ _for all the encouragement and kind messages :D hope you like it, babe!_

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><p>If London thought she was getting closer to the edge when she arrived at the airport with Steve and his father, now she had taken that one extra step and found herself on a free fall.<p>

They were together for about three months with lots of gaps in the middle but she had never felt like that before. To say the least, London was deeply, madly in love with Steve - and the feeling that took over her body after seeing him getting into that plane was also something that she had never experienced in her life, even though she had been through that many times before. Steve was gone, and, honestly, part of her left with him.

She was supposed to be at Hawaii Medical Center at 7am. But it was already 6:55am and London was at the McGarrett's place, sitting on the lanai.

.

After Steve got into his plane, John tried to talk to London but it was like she was deaf or mute. She wouldn't say a word or give him any signs that she was hearing him. So, when they got to the car, he waited until she returned from her trance but that took forever so, he decided that leaving her alone wasn't the best choice so he drove back to his place and London made her way to the lanai, where she sat there quietly.

John made some coffee and joined her. He was starting to get seriously concerned when, about ten minutes later, he finally heard her voice.

"I'm sorry," she whispered looking at him. He was sitting on an armchair by her side so he turned to look back at her.

"What for?"

"For being this pathetic human being," she said opening her arms a bit, like she was indicating herself.

"I wouldn't call you that," he replied with a half smile. "You care and that's never pathetic."

"Yeah... But I should be used to it," she blurted with a heavy sigh.

"How so?" John asked with a frown and London found herself talking about her family and her history with goodbyes...

"If it's any consolation," John said after hearing her story. "You never get used to it... You accept it and you deal with it the best you can, but every time you have to face it again, it strikes just the same."

London glanced at John who was calmly sipping from his mug. He was right. But, even though she knew that, it hurt so much to see Steve leave and just the thought of it made her want to curl up and hide, cry, wait until his return. But, looking at his father, ready to go back to work made her remember how she was strong for her brothers and then, London realized she needed to be strong, if not for Steve, for herself. Like always.

Looking at her watch, she noticed it was 7:03am.

"Holy crap, I gotta go," she said standing up in a heartbeat.

"Do you need to be somewhere?" John asked standing up and following her. She seemed to be in a rush.

"Yes. Work."

"I'll give you a ride," he said taking his keys while running to the kitchen to leave his coffee mug in the sink.

"You sure?" she asked already by the door. "I mean, I don't want to cause any more trouble..."

"Yes, I'm sure. It's no trouble, let's go."

London nodded and followed John to Steve's car. Oh, that would be one long ride...

.

"Hey, London." John called when she was about to jump out of the car. "If you ever need anything, you know the number, you know the address..."

The last two months, John got used to having London around; she and Steve were together so he got to see her every now and then. He even considered her like a daughter - not just because she saved his life and Steve's, but also because she was a nice person and she was good to Steve; he knew his son was very reserved and serious but, when he was around her, he was different - and seeing how she was taking Steve's deployment was heart crushing.

"Thank you," she said with the best smile she could give him; it didn't felt good - or real - but it showed she was trying. "I really appreciate it."

"Steve was very lucky to find you, London."

London took a deep breath as her eyes focused on something outside. "No, sir..." she said after a moment. "I was the lucky one."

Before the tears started to run freely again, she muttered a goodbye and left the car, walking as steadily as she could to the hospital.

.

That day, London managed to stay as busy as she could, for as long as she could and even so, her thoughts wandered back to Steve every now and then.

She was a little late by the time she got to the hospital but she stayed late just as well. Not only the twenty minutes to compensate her delay, but full five hours, and she just left at midnight because Chief Pryce literally escorted her out. He even called Nick Larsson to take her back home.

"You're torn up, London," he said when she tried to ditch Nick. "And I know why. McGarrett told me yesterday. Now go home, do whatever you need to do and come back. But I don't want to see you in my hospital tomorrow. If you put a foot here, the security will gently ask you to leave. You need some time and rest. Go. When you're ready, you come back..."

Very much against her will, London got into Nick's car and allowed him to drive her home; it took him about thirty seconds, maybe less and they were already in front of her building.

"Thank you Nick. Even though this was quite unnecessary..."

She had already stepped out of his Porsche when she noticed he was doing just the same, walking around his car and standing by her side.

"That's also very unnecessary," she said when he stood there looking at her.

"I know you, London. And it's not unnecessary." There were only very few occasions when Nick called her London, and it was when he was serious about something, so, London knew that, it wouldn't matter how many arguments she had, he would not give up. "C'mon," he said, placing one hand on the small of her back and walking with her inside.

She didn't want Nick to be there. She didn't want anyone to be there with her. But, when she stepped inside her apartment, all the memories she had with Steve there came back and she thought she couldn't breath.

"It's okay," Nick said taking London in his arms and walking with her to the sofa. "It's okay..."

She just sat there, with Nick holding her; his fingers combing her hair as she cried all the feelings she was trying to hold back inside.

"You love him, don't you?" Nick's words were soft and quiet but London couldn't handle that. Not right now.

"I don't wanna talk about it, Nick..."

_Of course not_, Nick thought to himself as he carried her to her bedroom. Honestly, that answer was better than a yes. He knew she loved him, and she was feeling the loss, even if it's just a temporary loss.

Nick stayed with London that night. He couldn't leave her alone; she was her best friend. And that night, he witnessed something that never in his life he imagined he'd see.

He knew London for about nine years. She was sixteen when she got into Medical School and they were in the same class. Maybe it was because she was that much brilliant but London was nothing like the other girls and Nick admired that a lot. She should be the most hardass woman he had ever met. And still, that night, he saw the tough London Hana Alexander break; he saw his best friend cry herself to sleep while holding onto a T-Shirt that he just knew that belonged to Steve McGarrett.

.

The next few days didn't go any easier.

Steve called about two days after he left so he could tell her that everything was alright. London never asked him where he was, but he assured her that he wasn't in any war zones and that sort of make her feel a little bit better. For a while. When the night fell, London found herself curling up as tears came down her eyes, soaking wet her pillow and sheets. She had to admit, she cared about Steve a lot more than she thought she did.

Eventually, London went back to her old routine: work, home, work, a ride to the groceries, sometimes to the beach, she even paid a few visit to John McGarrett but, over all, that was it. She drowned herself in the hospital and in work so she could keep her mind as busy as it was humanly possible.

London also heard from her two brothers in the next two weeks. Nate had finally been able to call after three weeks of nothing while Hunter was still at his base. She called her father to tell him that everything was okay. It bothered London a lot when the three men asked about Steve; they knew about his deployment and she just didn't feel like talking about it. Thankfully, they respected her privacy when London gave them her standard answer saying he was fine, she was fine.

Truth was, she was not fine. She missed Steve every single time; every hour, every minute, every second of every single one of her days... When she reached for her ring on her necklace and it wasn't there, when she went to bed and the pillow he used still smelled just like him, when she talked to him and she could almost feel his presence there... London missed Steve all the time and she just couldn't bring herself to talk about that without having her eyes getting wet and her voice begin to fail. So she did as she always did - keep it all to herself.

* * *

><p>Almost three months had passed since Steve left. It never got any easier and London doubted it would ever change. She always carried her phone along with the charger; Steve just called her cell because he knew her schedule was more than just a little unpredictable and it could change as fast as the speed of light sometimes. But, despite all challenges, they talked as much as it was possible. Sometimes it was two times in a week, one time she heard of him once and then nothing for about ten days - and she started to panic with the lack of news - but London and Steve tried their best to cope with that, after all, he was on duty and she was now about to end her fifth year of residency - three more weeks and she would finally be a surgeon. Not a resident anymore, an attendant.<p>

At some point, London was even making plans of visiting her family that she hadn't seen in a very long while. Things were alright, as good as it was possible... Until she had an unexpected surprise with very unexpected news. That event made her change everything in her life. Everything she thought it was solid turned out to be just as steady as quicksand. Her beliefs, goals, plans for the future, London saw all that crumbling, breaking, being changed against her will right before her eyes.

Suddenly, London Alexander found herself drifting to a whole new life without her consent. It was so unpredictable but, at the same time, it was her only truth. Her only option...

. . .


	14. Chapter 14

_Mahalo to everyone who's still with me. Feedback and/or constructive critique are always welcome, so feel free to leave a comment or send me a PM! _

* * *

><p>Steve's mission lasted longer than he could ever imagine and still, he could only get to the youngest Hesse - Anton. Anton wasn't exactly his main target but it was just as good. The SEALs knew that, if they had Anton, then Victor would come after him and they would be able to end that case.<p>

Steve McGarrett had also one extra motivation to get to the bottom of that exhaustive long mission - London Alexander.

Unlike his deployment to Iraq, Steve didn't get any leaves on this mission so, it's been over sixty months since the last time he was with London. Five long years.

They spoke every now and then; it wasn't easy for them to sycn their very messed up schedules, the difference of time zones and the fact that it wasn't always that Steve had time for a phone call. The mission he was assigned was complicated and he would be more than glad when he put his hands on Victor Hesse.

And, after going through half the world, Steve couldn't believe where it would all end - Hawaii. He had to stay away for five years, been to six different countries and it would all end in the very same Island where he got that mission in the first place.

If the circumstances were different, he would be glad to be back home. But that wasn't the case. His father was dead, he hadn't finished his mission and London wasn't living there anymore.

* * *

><p>About four months after Steve left Hawaii, he called London. They had speak about five days ago and he knew that London's residency had officially ended yesterday, but, since didn't have time to call her back then, he made sure that he'd have at least five seconds to call her and congratulate her MD degree.<p>

The five seconds was just an exaggeration, but he had no idea that his call would be a very short one. When Steve called, London was about to board on a plane.

"Is this some sort of celebration?" Steve asked when she said she where she was. "Are you going visiting your family?"

_"Actually... I'm moving."_

Moving? That was unexpected.

"I thought you'd stay in Hawaii... Where are you moving to?"

_"North Carolina. I applied to a job and, since it's just a little bit complicated to keep flying here and there, I'm moving... Why? Are you coming back?"_

He wished. "No... Not yet. I was just curious. You never mentioned a job in North Carolina."

_"I didn't say anything before because I didn't know if I'd make it..."_ Steve heard it when the air-hostess's voice announced they were about to take off. _"I am so terribly sorry, but I gotta go."_

"Yeah. Okay, no problem." There actually was a problem. It's been a while since he was gone and, when he learned about London moving, that made him wonder how different things would be when he returned...

Maybe he had let something show and London was great to catch the slightest of all hints, or maybe she felt just the same, the thing is, without him saying a word about that, she said the right words and it made him feel a little bit better.

_"Hey babe, I didn't forget... Let me know when you're back and we'll meet. I promise."_ The way those words came out of her mouth, so softly and sweet, and London calling him 'babe', it was almost like nothing happened between them; no distance, no long days without hearing from each other, no nothing. _"I miss you..."_

The traces of sadness in her voice were totally perceptible, especially when he heard the muffled sob she was definitely trying to hold back. Once again, he found himself closing his hand around the ring she gave to him when he left. The ring that he never took out of his neck, not even for a second.

"I miss you too, beautiful." He struggled to keep at least his voice steady, since his breathings and heart rate were totally messed up.

_"Take care, sailor... Bye."_

Steve could only mutter a _'bye'_ in response and London hang up.

Putting his phone down, Steve took a deep breath. Rubbing his neck, he found himself making this silent prayer, hoping that they could make it through that situation.

.

After the first year passed and his SEAL Team still didn't find the Hesse's, Steve thought things would change between him and London; he figured they would talk less and less and, eventually, they wouldn't talk anymore. But that's not what happened. Maybe someone heard Steve's prayers because after almost four years apart, London and Steve still talked regularly.

_"So, did you find any nice ladies over there... wherever you are?"_

Steve chuckled. They've been through that conversation a couple of times before.

"I'm a man on a mission, woman. I don't have time for dating!"

He always frowned inwardly when that thought crossed his mind. For the most part, he didn't mind not dating - he was working - but, he couldn't ignore that, even though they never ended what they had, four years was a long time. Very long, and, honestly, he wouldn't blame London if she got sick and tired of that and decided to move on.

_"Well, you better not find any."_

Even though London was always playful and she would add a soft laugh after that, in the bottom of her heart, she meant that. If Steve knew that or not, she would never know, but London was really willing to honor her word.

"Right back at ya."

* * *

><p>It's been two months since Steve went back to Hawaii.<p>

He returned to finish his mission as a SEAL and, somehow, he became some sort of cop of the task force that the Governor instated, but he was alright with that. He had a nice team and he trusted them with his life. He had found Victor Hesse but the man managed to escape. Steve didn't gave up on the task of finding the criminal, but, as the leader of the Five-0s, he had to deal with other cases, and he would work on them with the same dedication and commitment as always.

Despite all the lows and bumpy roads, his life turned out to be something that he trully enjoyed. But he could never forget her.

The Five-0s had just ended a case and Steve was in his office, going through some paperwork. Actually, he had finished that about five minutes ago and he was just sitting there.

Danny had finished his share of bureaucratic work as well and couldn't not notice Steve's odd behavior. His partner was sitting in his office, quietly, but that's not what made Danny frown inwardly - he knew Steve was a serious, quiet and reserved man. What caught his attention was his expression.

Steve had his eyes locked on something he had in his hands and Danny could swear the SuperSEAL was a little upset.

"Hey, you okay?"

Steve rose his eyes from whatever it was that he was holding to find Danny on his door. For the first time in history, Danny had knocked.

"Yeah, I'm good."

The blonde detective knew that Steve was lying; not only his tone accused it, but also the way he answered that a bit too fast and how he saw a glimpse of sadness in his eyes shortly before he hid it behind his mask.

"That was lousy," Danny said walking into Steve's office and standing in front of him. "What's bothering you?"

Steve shifted his glance to the top of his desk. He should have seen this coming because that was just like Danny. Danny Williams and his detective training.

"It's nothing," Steve said with a shrug, but his eyes sold him when he looked to his hand and he saw the necklace he had been holding; his hand turned into fist was hiding the ring.

"Oh, really?" Danny raised an eyebrow. "If it's nothing then, can I ask what is it that you're holding so tightly, like it'll disappear if you let go?" he asked pointing to the thin silvery piece of the necklace that was escaping from Steve's grip.

Steve didn't answer right away and that's when Danny knew something wasn't right.

"C'mon," he said sitting on the chair in front of his desk. "Talk to me. Maybe I can help."

"No one can help, Danny."

The way Steve said those words made Danny straighten on the chair. He sounded so sure and so certain, but it wasn't just that - he also sounded defeated.

"Well, tell me and we'll see if there's something we can do."

Steve looked at the short man in front of him. It's been only two months but they've been through a lot together, as partners and as a team, and Steve knew he could trust him. He knew that, if there was something, anything that Danny could do, he would. But, in this case, there was nothing. Steve himself tried everything and nothing came out of that...

"Steve, you've been doing this practically every single day since we met. Before we leave, you will sit there and you'll take whatever it is that you keep in this drawer and you'll stare at it. It's not nothing. So, tell me what's wrong. We work together and we're a team. We'll help you, man. We all will."

Steve knew that Danny wouldn't give up until he knew what he was holding. He didn't want to discuss that; he never did, but he knew it was the only way to make Danny stop. So he opened his hand and, hesitating a bit, he showed Danny the ring on the necklace.

"Woah..." Danny's eyes widened as he took the jewelry in his hands. So many things had crossed his mind when he saw the necklace. He thought it could be a locket, or some pendant, maybe a cross but a ring? A fancy diamond ring? That was unexpected. "Does this mean what I think it means?"

"I got this five years ago, before I left to find Hesse..."

"So... You were engaged?"

"No, I wasn't. I got this from a - friend..." Steve didn't like voicing that - friend - but, he couldn't make himself say girlfriend. "And I haven't heard from her in a while."

Danny heard that and noticed that there was more to that than Steve was willing to share.

"Why don't you call her?" he asked casually, not aiming to meddle in his private life that much.

"I tried," Steve admitted. "I've been trying to reach her since before I came back to Hawaii but I can't."

That was new. Steve couldn't find a girl? He could track anyone in any corner of the world and he couldn't find one woman?

"I can try if you want to. Two heads must work better than one, especially when one is yours," Danny played and Steve chuckled. He was glad to have someone like Danny. His blonde partner was nothing like London but he knew how to make him smile every now and then, and it was good.

"Thanks, man. I appreciate it..."

Steve went back to his place that day feeling not so good. When he woke up that Wednesday and remembered the date, he knew his day wouldn't be easy, but his talk with Danny made the memories returned a lot more vividly.

It was November 24th, 2010 and it's been over a year since he last spoke with London. After that, nothing. The past three months he had been waiting for her to call, but that never happened... Steve didn't know where she was or how she was, and he had a feeling that something wasn't right...

* * *

><p><em>August, 24th 2009<em>

Steve and his men were in Vladivostok, Russia. It was around 9pm, local time and they were going through the intel they had on Anton Hesse and they were working to come up with the best action plan and strategy when he was pulled from it by his Commanding Officer who was calling him for a video call.

"Yes, sir?"

Giving his CO the standard hand salute, Steve thought the man had some new information on the whereabouts of Victor or Anton, but instead, he just told him to hold on because there was someone wanting to speak with him.

_"Hello, stranger." _Steve's jaw dropped slightly open when he saw London smiling at him. God, it's been forever since he last spoke with her, and even longer since the last time he saw that smile. _"How are you doing, sailor?"_

"Well, hi there," he said after a moment when his mind stopped working. He was shocked. "I am good. I'm good, how are you?"

_"Better now,"_ she replied and he felt his heart tighten in his chest. London looked a bit different, but he couldn't focus on what was that because she was right there, with his favorite smile on her face. She had a face for a smile and, my God, she should have the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. _"Hey, are you people hiding in a cave or something? You're not as tanned as I remember..."_

"You know... Things here are kinda crazy and I couldn't book an hour to make that artificial tan that'll make me look like a carrot, but I'll do that soon, I promise."

He was joking. That should be the first time he made a joke in centuries. Unconsciously, Steve's thoughts drifted back to when he and London shared laughs and jokes and they would even go for a walk on the beach at night. Those seem like someone else's memories, of memories from another life...

_"Sure, you do that,"_ London replied and her laugh brought him back to reality. _"So, uh- are you like - super busy?"_

"Not really." That wasn't exactly true, but he knew the men he was working with enough to trust they could be a few minutes alone. "Why?"

_"Well, I needed to talk to you..."_ Those words made Steve's heart sank. That didn't sound good. Especially when he realized that, if it was 9pm in Russia, then it should be midnight in North Carolina.. _"Please, just... wipe that odd look off of your face. I don't know what just crossed your mind but I guarantee, that's not it."_

Her words caught him with his guard slightly down. "Okay. What is it?" Steve said casually, he had his game face on now and seemed quite calm, not exactly relaxed, but he was pretty sure he didn't have an odd look. But he did notice London getting a bit nervous to say whatever she had to tell him.

_"I'm gonna be away for a few months; six to twelve to be more precise. There's this group of doctors, I'm on it, and we'll do some work abroad. I just wanted to talk to you before I leave... I'm sorry if I'm bothering or disturbing you, by the way. I called dad and he arranged this video call with your superiors, because, well, I don't know when we'll talk again. I'll have my phone but we're mainly going to help people who really need it and things might get a little unpredictable, we might have to go to somewhere where my phone won't work so... I just wanted to tell you - and see you."_

Steve heard that thoughtfully. What she told him wasn't as bad as what he had imagined, but still, it wasn't exactly the definition of great news. "You are not bothering nor disturbing me. I'm really glad to talk and see you again - say thanks to your father for me, okay?" London smiled and Steve felt bad when he spoke his next words. "And I understand. I mean, it's your job. You'll help people and that's what you always dreamed of, right? I guess - we'll talk in six to twelve months then..."

London didn't respond to that, it wasn't really necessary. Even through a laptop screen, Steve could tell she was sad. It was like saying another goodbye and without the hello in between.

"So... When?"

The ghost of a smile played with London's lips when she heard the simple question she made Steve a while ago.

_"In about... Five hours,"_ she announced blankly. Her voice lacked any emotions and Steve found that a little bit unusual; then realized why._ "I should get going now,"_ London said biting her lower lip, gesture that Steve recognized as her attempt to show braveness - unnecessary, because he knew how tough she was. _"I need to be up in a few..."_

"Okay." Steve's agreement wasn't cheerful at all. "Alright..."

_"Hey, Steve... Take care will ya? And, please, be safe."_ London was now fighting to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. Her voice was slightly shaky but that was the best she could do.

"You too," he replied seriously. He could see her fight to not break and he managed to maintain his attitude and help her with that. As a SEAL, he had that down to a science.

_"I miss you, babe,"_ she whispered and reached out as if to touch him. Steve did the same.

"I miss you too, beautiful."

He watched as a single tear fell from her left eye and it made its way down her cheek to die on the corner of her mouth. London had the most beautiful sad smile plastered on her face. A smile that could tell a story and it reminded him of everything that they meant and represented for each other. A smile that reminded him of everything they have lived together.

Steve could still see London smiling at him, even when the screen went dark and their video call was disconnected. Steve burned that image in his memory. It was sad and beautiful, lovely and heartbreaking; it was the image of the consequences of those four years. And, even though sometimes their phone calls gave him the impression that they sliding back to friends, he knew that she never forgot or stopped thinking about him and he fell for her all over again.

.

London disconnected the video call in the right time. Seconds later, she couldn't hold the tears back anymore.

It's been one hell of a fight the last four years. Not only because Steve was on the other side of the globe - now she knew he was in Russia - but because she had to put up with a lot.

London should've had come clean with Steve a very long time ago. To be more precise, something around four years ago. But she didn't. And tonight, she did just the same. Instead of telling him the truth, she painted it colorful and told him a sugar coated version of it. She was indeed going abroad with a group of doctors, but that wasn't everything. And that's why she said their unuttered goodbye that early. Because, if Steve asked any further information, she wouldn't have an answer. She wouldn't lie, but she couldn't tell him the truth. So, she chose the easy way out and now there she was. Her heart weighting a ton and her conscience not much lighter.

She didn't have any sleep that night. At 4am she was up and ready, and at 4:30am she was already by the airplane. Her brother and father by her side.

It surprised her when she was told her dad there. London thought he wouldn't make it to North Carolina. But there he was.

"Hey... I want you to take care, alright? Be safe," Hunter said softly as he pulled her for a hug.

"I will, Hunt." London held him for dear life. They stick together the past four years and he helped her through a lot. Saying goodbye was never easy. Not when she was the one to leave everyone behind.

"Did you tell him?" Hunter asked quietly on her ear after a minute or so, making London sigh. She knew he was asking about Steve. Hunter never met the SEAL, but he knew all about him. And he even spoke with him once over the phone, accidentally, of course. He and London had the same cell phone, identical so, by mistake, he took hers instead of his. It was awkward, not to mention that London went crazy at him.

"No, I didn't," she admitted weakly. "I couldn't."

Hunter loosened the embrace and glanced at her; she felt like he was staring into her soul. "London..."

"Do not _London_ me," she said a little annoyed. "He has enough to worry about. He's been on this job for four years. What good would it do if I told him?"

"Would you like to be left in the dark?"

"That is not the point, Hunter... I would only add unnecessary drama to his life and I can't do it. Please. Try to understand."

He did. He didn't exactly agree, but he definitely understood. That was London, she would always think about others before herself.

"I do," he said pulling her close again and kissing her forehead.

"Don't tell him," she asked resting her head on his shoulder. "I know you wouldn't just call him out of the blue but please, don't tell him. Unless I..."

"I won't," he said quickly, not allowing her to end that sentence. "And you won't. You hear me. You'll tell him yourself once you're back."

London and Hunter pulled apart and held each other's glance for a minute. His words made both feel their hearts skip a beat.

"Alright," she whispered, her eyes glistening with emotion.

"Alright," Hunter agreed holding her hands in his. "Also, you'll be the one who'll handle the ass kicking thing that'll come with the truth, sis."

"Well, thank you. That's very nice of you, Hunter. What a great brother you are..."

They shared a moment of laughter. She would sure miss that... Then London turned to look at her father, one hand still holding her brother's. It's been a while since she last saw her own dad and, now that they were together again, she was about to leave and it hit her hard.

"Thank you for being here, dad." Her voice wasn't louder than a whisper and it was choked with emotions. Unspoken emotions.

"I wouldn't miss it for a thing," he said and London had to blink more than just a couple of times to keep a tear from falling. "Be safe, sweetheart."

London felt a tear falling down her cheeks but she brushed it off. "Will be, dad." There was so much she wanted to tell him but she didn't. That's not how it works in her family.

He pulled her for a tight embrace and London felt her heart stopping for a moment. God, that was hard.

Hunter joined them after a minute and the three Alexander's stood there. That was her solid rock. Those two men were her safe ground. London just wished Steve was there too..

They pulled apart when someone brought her back to reality.

"Captain Alexander."

The man called and London looked at her brother and her dad.

"That's me," she said in a shaky whisper. Against all odds, London joined the service.

Approximately three months after Steve was deployed on his mission, London was working at the Hawaii Medical Center when she got a visit from Hunter. She just needed to put her eyes on him to know something was so deeply wrong. He was worn out, and it looked like he hadn't had any sleep in the past three days or so. When he closed his arms around her, she knew, and she didn't even have to read the letter that he handed her moments later at her apartment. She read a letter exactly like that years ago, only the name was different. This time, instead of reading "Lieutenant Colonel Linda Nakamura", her eyes read "Major Nathan Alexander". Her brother was dead. KIA.

Reading those three letters again made London Alexander, MD became US Army Captain Alexander, member of the 541st Medical Detachment, one of four Airborne Forward Surgical Teams of the United States Army assigned to the 44th Medical Brigade, in Fort Bragg, North Carolina.

As usual, Hunter and her father gave her the standard hand salute, and London returned it.

"Good luck, soldier." Her brother and dad said that in unison and London felt a smile tugging at her lips.

"Thank you, Major General," she said looking at her father, then, turning to look at her brother, she added: "Major."

It was her first time on that situation, on that side and, suddenly, London realized how hard it was to say anything. It could be the last thing they could ever tell their loved ones - and that was hell.

"Dad... Hunt..." London felt a lump on her throat just by saying their names. Being the one to leave was even worse than being the one left behind.

"We know, London," Hunter said when he noticed she couldn't go any further.

"We love you too, sweetheart." That was her father, and London had to face World War III inside her. She wanted to cry; the Army taught her to not let it show but it was significantly different when it comes from your family.

"See you guys later," she said as she collected her duffel bag from the ground.

Hunter and her brother pulled London for a last hug and, after kissing her on the cheeks, they let her go.

As she climbed the ramp to get on the plane, London found herself reaching for the necklace around her neck. But it wasn't there and her fingers touched her dogtags. She instantly found herself thinking about Steve. What if she never had a chance to see him again? What if they never speak again? She never told him how important he was. She never told him she loved him... London closed her eyes to avoid the tears to come down her face when the plane took off. She was on her way to Iraq, and Steve didn't know a thing about it...

. . .


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N:** I'm not entirely sure of this chapter but then again, I couldn't think of a way to make it better. Sorry if it looks disjointed.  
><em>

_Mahalo to everyone who's still with me, especially to those who reviewed my last chapter; I'd love to know what you think about this one. Feel encouraged to leave a comment or send a message._

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><p>A few days went by ever since Steve told Danny about London and he didn't hear a word from his partner regarding that matter yet. Danny never said anything and, truth be told, Steve never mentioned her again.<p>

He had a feeling that something was odd but he never thought something was that much wrong. How could it be, right? London was doctor, a brilliant surgeon and, according to what she told him the last time they spoke, she would help people abroad. She could be anywhere as far as he knew but she should be alright.

At least that's what he had in mind until Danny show up in his office, about two weeks after the day he found Steve with the necklace in his hands.

"Do you have a minute?" Danny didn't bother knocking this time, or waiting for an answer for that matter. He just walked in and sat on the chair in front of Steve's desk.

"Sure, come on in. Oh and please, have a seat," Steve said sarcastically but not harshly. Danny didn't register that, and if he did, he chose to ignore it completely.

"So, about your _friend_, London, I did some research and all I learned was that she finished surgical residency in Hawaii, at the Hawaii Medical Center and then, shortly after that, she moved to North Carolina. She was offered an opportunity - according to her colleagues, a **major** opportunity to stay here but she didn't even consider it. But then again, with what she had to go through, I sympathize with her..."

Steve frowned. He never did any research of any kind on London. He never felt the need, and, even though he knew that she had gone to North Carolina, he had no idea what Danny meant by "_what she had to go through_".

"Sympathize? What are you talking about, Danny?"

"I'm talking about her brother," Danny replied a bit impatiently. "You know, the one who died before she finished her residency."

Steve's mind went blank for a while. London's brother died? Who? And how come she never mentioned such thing?

"You... didn't know, did you?" Danny said after a moment when Steve didn't do or say anything.

"No," Steve said emotionless in response. "I didn't know... What's his name?"

"Nathan Alexander." That name echoed in Steve's ears and brain and remained there. Nate died. Why London never mentioned it? It's been five years now and she never said anything about that? Maybe she didn't want to go through the pain of talking about that but still, Steve didn't understand.

That piece of information made Steve follow Danny's steps and try to find her. It's been half a decade since he died but he couldn't stop thinking about her and the sadness that she felt when she said goodbye to him. That weird sensation he had been having for the past three months was back and on full mode.

Danny watched as his partner went from silent to agitated. His hands reached his phone in record time and, before he could open his mouth, Steve had already called someone.

"What are you doing?" he asked a little concerned. He knew Steve just enough to know when he was doing something impulsive - and that's exactly what was happening.

"I'm gonna find her," he replied simply, before he speak to whoever it was on the phone. "Cage, this is Steve. I need that favor now."

"Cage? Who's Cage?" Danny whispered, trying to understand what on Earth Steve was planning but the tall man behind the desk just shushed him with his hand.

"I'm trying to find a friend but I'm not having any luck. Her name's London Alexander, she's a doctor, a surgeon and the last time I heard from her she was in North Carolina... I don't know which hospital or city she is... Yes. Can you find her?... Okay. Call me."

Steve had just disconnected the phone call and Danny was already all over him with questions. "Will you tell me who the hell is Cage and why did you call this person?"

Steve inhaled deeply. He was expecting that reaction from Danny. "Shane Cage is a friend. We worked together when I was a SEAL and he owes me a favor or two… I need to find her, Danny."

Danny's hands twitched and Steve knew he wanted to say something. "What is it?"

"Look, don't get me wrong, I find it lovely that you actually have feelings for someone and that it's different than the usual Rambo thing you have going on, I really do. But, why now? I mean, you never mentioned her before and suddenly you're calling your ninja friends and the whole cavalry to find her?"

Actually, Steve was starting to get content with the lack of words from London. The last time he spoke with her was in August, 2009 and she said she would be back in about a year... It was December, 2010.

He considered that maybe she had moved on, maybe she was still abroad doing medical service, maybe, maybe... So many maybes had crossed Steve's mind over the past sixteen months that he was honestly starting to believe that, whatever remains of his relationship with London that could have endured the four long years away, had vanished throughout that fifth year.

But, even though he was inclined to accept that fact, he couldn't erase the memories that were filling his house and he couldn't not think about her and her words whenever he saw her necklace. It was inevitable. London was inevitable, just like that odd feeling he had been having for the past three months. It wouldn't go away and now he had a damn good reason to believe he was right.

"Because, Danny, I got a feeling..."

"You have a feeling, obviously... And what is this feeling?"

"I don't know. Something is not right but I can't tell what exactly, and I just can't shake it off."

"So you're using your privileged sources of information to find her... Alright then. I hope they can find her."

Steve looked at Danny and raised an eyebrow dubiously. "Seriously, that's all? No rantings about how I'm not supposed to do it because I'm using government resources for personal purposes and that's highly unethical?"

"Nope," Danny said standing up. "I mean, I'll be a mess if the government or anyone find out what you're doing, but, other than that, I'm all for it."

"Really? Can I ask why?"

"Because I need to meet this woman. I need to know who is the person that's capable of making a heart grow in that," Danny said pointing to Steve's chest and it made him smile inwardly. Instinctively, he put his hand above his heart. London never made a heart grow, but she gave him a second chance. Thanks to the finest work of her magic hands, there wasn't a scar to remind him of that, but he would never forget it.

"Thanks, Danny."

"Yeah. Don't mention it." Danny stopped by the door and, before he could walk away, he turned to face Steve, who had this unusual look in his eyes, like he was really worried, maybe a little scared. "Hey, SuperSEAL. Don't worry that big head of yours. She might be alright, and if something's wrong, we'll figure it out."

Steve looked at Danny who was smiling reassuringly at him. He wanted to trust his partner's words, but right now, he wasn't so sure he could do that.

.

The next day, Steve got a call from Cage. He hadn't found any records of a doctor or surgeon with the name of London Alexander in any hospitals of North Carolina.

"It can't be... Are you sure?"

_"Positive. Your friend is not member of any hospital staff in the state of North Carolina... Maybe you're mistaken it for South Carolina?"_

"Maybe…" Steve knew he wasn't wrong, but now, he was a lot more determined to find her. He didn't mind if she yelled at him for doing so, he would find London. "Alright, uh- can you search it nation wide?"

_"I can but... It might take a while."_

"I don't mind how long it might take, just do it. Please."

_"Roger that. But, Steve... If you don't mind my asking, why am I doing this? Why are you doing this?"_

"I just need to find her. Call me when you're done. I gotta go."

Even though Steve and his team were able to end a tough case that Friday, whatever happiness for doing so went downhill when he ended that phone call. London wasn't working at any hospitals in North Carolina, but he was damn sure she said she would be going there, even Danny confirmed she moved to that state. So, how was that possible? Where was she? Something wasn't making any sense...

* * *

><p>A whole week had gone and Steve didn't hear a thing from his SEAL friend. He called Shane Cage Tuesday but, since it was the end of the year, he was particularly busy, but he was still working on that search - thus far, nothing. He promised he would call as soon as he finished his search and Steve waited.<p>

But that Friday, Steve forgot about London completely. He and his team were forced to face one crappy December 24th when Chin had this bomb locked on his neck. It was nerve wrecking and it didn't give anyone much room to think of something differently that get him out of that still in one piece.

And so they did. Actually, they did more than save Chin's life; Steve finally put Victor Hesse behind bars and put an end on that part of his life. The exact same part that took him away from London...

Steve found himself calling London that night. After he left Danny's apartment where the whole team went to celebrate Christmas Eve, Steve reached for his phone and dialed her number. Things seemed to be going alright that night and he thought maybe - just maybe - she would answer him this time. But, like always, the call went straight to voicemail.

.

The next day, Steve turned Danny's offer to have lunch with him, Gracie and Rachel – Stan had to go to the Big Island. It was Christmas but he felt like staying alone for a while. The day before marked fifteen months since the last time he heard from London.

Determined to keep that thought out of his mind, Steve went for a walk. The walk turned into a run and he had run over a mile before he stopped. It worked. He was able to keep his thoughts away from that territory he didn't want to visit but, around 3pm, Steve had ran out of ideas to keep his mind busy. So, even though it was December 25th, an official holiday, meaning day off, he went to the Five-0 HQ.

* * *

><p>It's been too long since the last time she was in Hawaii. Way too long. A little over half a decade.<p>

Things were different but, at the same time, it was all the same. From inside the taxi cab, London saw the streets of Oahu and the feeling of home away from home embraced her once again as a smile played with her lips.

She passed in front of the Hawaii Medical Center, where she thought she would start her career as a surgeon; she saw her apartment, where she lived for a little over five years; she spotted the beach where she and Steve ended up after their first date...

Steve. God, it's been forever since the last time she spoke with him. The fifteen months felt like fifteen years in her opinion.

Thinking about that made London start to panic slowly. One year is too long. Sure she managed to stay for four years without him but they spoke regularly. That all could have tumbled down in one year and three months.

Damn! Those three extra months she stayed in Iraq were definitely not in her plans, and she tried really hard to call Steve, but it wasn't easy. She only spoke with her father twice and only because he worked his magic and arranged a phone call. But Steve and Hunter? Nothing.

As far as she could tell, Steve could have been married by now and she would have no idea. That thought alone almost made her tell the driver to take the next return and drive her back to the airport. And she would have done that if she didn't glance to her phone to see Steve's face, smiling back at her; too bad it was just her phone wallpaper.

"We're here, ma'am."

The driver's voice almost made London jump out of her skin. And when she noticed where they were, she her heart skip a beat as her stomach sank. She felt like she was about to puke when she saw the Kamehameha statue in front of her eyes.

"Are you sure this is where you want to stay?" he asked curiously. It was Saturday. Christmas. Almost 5pm. Why she would want to stay there? No one was working.

"Yes," she whispered, trying to get a hold on her emotions. She remembered the phone call she got from Hunter, saying that Steve was at the Five-0 headquarters and he gave her the precise location of it. How he knew that? She had no idea. But she didn't ask. She knew he wouldn't tell her and, honestly, as long as he was right, she didn't mind how he had access to that information.

London gave the driver 75 dollars and told him to wait. If she didn't return in ten minutes, he could go.

She nervously ran her hands down her skirt a couple of times; it was all crumpled thanks to an hour and a half driving from Fayetteville to Raleigh and then, about thirteen hours of flight from Raleigh-Durham International Airport to the Honolulu International Airport. She soon gave up on trying to make it looked at least alright so, with her carry-on luggage, she walked into the building and climbed the stairs; it seemed like they were the longest stairs ever, but, when she spotted the glass doors that would grant her access to the Five-0 Task Force Headquarters, she froze.

Never in her life, London felt that terrified. Actually, when she first witnessed a bombing attack in Iraq, that was pretty close to what she was feeling right now; of course the bombing was a lot worse than that, but she felt her legs threatening to buckle just the same.

It took her longer than three minutes to get herself under control and finally take a step, sure that she wouldn't fall. It helped her when she thought Steve could walk out at any minute and find her, standing there like a complete idiot. So, with that "encouraging" thought, London walked to the doors and through it.

At first, she thought Hunter, along with the few men wearing the HPD uniform she had to pass through and explain why she was there – _"I'm Captain Alexander, United States Army and I'm here to speak with Commander McGarrett" _–, were wrong; the place seemed to be dead empty. But she had just taken a quick glance; in the Army, she learned to look for threats first, identify any possible enemies; not that she was in a hostile situation or in a warzone but, apparently, she had that down to a science now and it happened naturally, like breathing or blinking. But, when she looked again, this time more carefully, she saw him. She would recognize him anywhere in the world, no matter what. It was him. It was Steve McGarrett.

He was in this small room with glass walls at the end of the HQ and, judging by his lack of reactions, he hadn't seen her.

London stood there for a few seconds as her heart started to pound on her chest and her breathing became irregular - the same reaction he always caused to her, but, this time, it was a thousand times stronger.

She even felt her palms sweating and, when he shifted in the chair he was sitting, London felt like her heart was now on her throat and she was this close to put it out.

Swallowing hard, she let go of her bag and started walking towards that room. Her pace wasn't steady, her heart was pounding, she was feeling light-headed but she kept going, until she stopped a few meters from the door. He was still focused on some paper or whatever that was lying on his desk and didn't see her.

Taking one last deep breath, London closed the space between her and the door that was in the middle of Steve and herself.

* * *

><p>There was a little pile of paperwork to be done on Steve's desk so he focused completely and solely on the task of finishing it.<p>

_What a way to spend Christmas,_ he thought to himself when his hands reached the fifth file.

For the fifth time, Steve shut the whole world off and shifted his solely attention to the sheets of paper on his desk. It was Christmas and people would definitely be doing something more interesting than trying to break into that building - besides, there were security guards on the entrance; he walked past five men in uniform before he got to his HQ.

He was so unaware of the world around him that he didn't see or hear the glass doors open quietly and a lonely figure walked into the HQ. He didn't even notice when the same person walked quietly across the entire place and stopped less than a meter from his door. He only snapped out of his trance when he heard a soft knock.

Steve raised his eyes in no time and reached for the weapon that he kept on his waist but he never took it out of its holster; his hands, along with his body, froze, and he noticed his brain wasn't processing anything else. His eyes were locked on the figure that was now opening the door.

"Hello, stranger..."

Steve couldn't believe his eyes or his ears for that matter. Was he dreaming? Hallucinating?

"London..."

. . .


	16. Chapter 16

__Mahalo to everyone who's still with me. Feedback and/or constructive critique are always welcome, so feel free to leave a comment or send me a PM! __

**A/N:**_ I need to correct an early statement. This is now slightly AU because I'm not bringing Cath Rollins to this story. I like her and everything, but I was having a hard time deciding how to make things work with London and Steve and Cath, so I decided to take the easy way out and keep Cath out of it. Also, I didn't want to _force a friend to decide who she love more, Cathor London._. Ergo, this is it._

**A/N²:**_ Also, I didn't do much edit on this chapter. I should probably try to find a Beta to help me, but I don't know how this Beta things works... In any case, I hope you enjoy!  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>"London..."<em>

London felt her heart pounding underneath her ribs when Steve's lips opened to whisper her name, and she thought she was about to have a heart attack when he stood up, walked around his table and stopped right in front of her. She held her breath unconsciously as his eyes scanned every single inch of her body at least two times. He was a bit different on the outside; his eyes were a little darker, his posture - which used to be the perfect reflect of his attitude - was stricter, his shoulders showed a lot of tension, he was way more serious and his hair now had some shades of gray, not so much, but it was perceptible. But, regardless of all changes, he looked even more handsome than she could remember.

Steve was also in shock. He had been trying to find her for the past weeks and, so far, he didn't find anything... But, suddenly, London was there. In Hawaii. At the Five-0 Headquarters. Standing beautifully in front of him.

He noticed she was slightly different - actually, more than just a little to be honest. Her prior porcelain pale skin had a little bit of a tan, the soft traces that he remembered on her face seemed to be fading, like she had toughen, gone through a very hard time, it also seemed that - she had been going to the gym? But Steve didn't pay that much attention to those minor details; the woman in front of him was London, and he felt his mouth hanging slightly open but he couldn't think of anything to say - he was in awe.

London was the one to break that loud silence, but not without stuttering a little bit. She had been gone for so long; she couldn't believe she was actually seeing Steve again.

"Steve..." Her voice wasn't steady but she couldn't do much about that. The adrenaline in her veins wouldn't let her to be steady; her breathing was erratic, her heart rate increased to astronomic levels, she had to dig her nails on her palm so she could just be sure this was really happening and she wasn't dreaming. "Are you - alright? You look like you saw a ghost or something." London tried to open a smile as she said those words as casually and playfully as it was possible; lately, she didn't have much to smile about.

Steve blinked a couple of times when he saw that smile. It wasn't as carefree as his memories reminded him but, man, it was a lot better than any of his dreams.

"Or something," he said, still a little bewildered. Steve's expression turned into a frown and, even though it's been an eternity, London knew his brain was working - full throttle.

"You look great," she said still holding onto that crooked smile of hers but it didn't last too long; she was trying to make some small talk, maybe get through the awkwardeness of that situation but it didn't work as she was expecting so, eventually, London dropped the act. "I'm sorry," she whispered and Steve's heart dropped a few inches when he recognized traces of sadness in her voice and when he saw her eyes were now locked on the floor, to be more precise, on the blue flats she was wearing.

"What are you sorry for?" Steve asked taking a small step closer to her. He considered using his fingers to lift her head up, but he didn't do it.

"Oh, so many reasons..."

"What are you talking about?" This sudden rush of uncertainty threatened to take over his body but Steve didn't let it. At least he tried to hide that.

"I heard about John," she said weakly and Steve swallowed hard. Talking about his father wasn't on the list of his favorite subjects. When she raised her eyes to meet his, Steve noticed why she looked down in the first place - her eyes were slightly wet. "I wasn't told right away. Actually, I heard about it about six weeks ago and I tried to call you, I really did. And I tried to come back earlier, but-" London's voice broke when she tried to hold back a sob that was already in her throat. "I'm so, so sorry, Steve. Also... Sorry it took me this long." London's voice faded to a hardly audible whisper and he almost didn't make sense out of her words. "I'm sorry I didn't keep my promise."

Steve had his eyes locked on London's while she was speaking, and he felt his heart sank when she said those last words and he saw the relentless onslaught of emotions taking over her body.

He took another step in her direction and personal space was now history. Ever since he saw her there, many questions started popping in his head - _Where were you? Where have you been for the past four years prior that video call? What were you doing? Why you didn't tell me about your brother? When did you come? How did you know where to find me? What happens now?_ - but, right now, it had stopped. His mind went blank and, moved by something else that Steve later called "instinct", he closed the little space between them and closed his arms around her body.

"It's okay," he whispered softly in her ear; one of his hands caressing the back of her head. "It's okay...

Steve waited over five years for that hug. Five years yearning for that moment and it was finally there. And when he felt London's arms sliding around his waist, he tightened the embrace, not wanting to have any space in between them and they stood there, holding onto each other for dear life.

London buried her face on Steve's shoulder and inhaled his scent that instantly stunned her, knocking her senseless. She was completely oblivious to the world around them - actually, right now, her world was Steve, her whole galaxy was the man she finally had back in her arms.

Steve lost himself on the softness of her skin while her natural perfume numbed all of his senses. He could feel the pulsing point on her neck, her heart pounding against his chest and her heavy breathing, telling him he wasn't dreaming, he wasn't hallucinating - it was all real. Steve closed his eyes and said a prayer. He had her back and, suddenly, it was like all those five years of absence had vanished. Just like that. Like magic.

Thinking about magic made Steve remember the last night at Danny's and Grace saying that Christmas was _magical_.

_Maybe the little girt was right,_ Steve thought to himself in the exact same moment London's arms tightened around his waist and she turned her head in a way that her breathings were tickling his neck. It sent a shiver down his spine, more than just one time.

For how long they stood there, bodies entangled, blind and deaf to the surroundings, in the middle of Steve's office? None of them could tell for sure, but it was the best feeling that Steve and London experienced in a very long time.

.

London was the first to make a move to end that contact. She regretted it the moment she loosened her arms around Steve's warm body; she wanted to keep him close, she didn't want to let go, she wanted to stay lost in that moment for the rest of her life. But, if she learned a lesson from these past five years, it was that things change.

She changed. Steve had changed. They sure weren't the same from five years ago. Right now, the most important question was: how much all those changes affected them?

London took a deep breath to calm her nerves; they were a wreck. Actually, she was a total wreck. She had returned home last Wednesday, but she still hadn't got used to that routine yet. Everything was different than what she was used to; different time zone, different reality, different priorities - it was practically a different life.

"When did you get here?" Steve asked curiously. London had taken a small step back, only inches, but enough to make both feel the distance, especially when they were so close.

"Just now," she said looking back to the door; Steve followed her eyes and saw the carry-on luggage standing there.

"And... How did you know where to find me?" Steve had this curious and suspicious look in his eyes. Practically no one knew where he was; not even Danny.

"I didn't. Not until about half hour ago..." London saw Steve's expression turn into a frown, and she knew he wasn't following, so she shortly added: "My brother. Probably my father too."

That made sense. Steve tried not to think about how well connected they were to get that information but it sure made sense.

"But I must say, I did not expect to find you here... Actually, I didn't expect to see you today," London admitted, shifting on the same place.

Steve's frown was back. "Why?"

If Danny was there, Steve was damn sure he would make his life hell for as long as he could. That simple 'why?', even though it lacked emotion, it still sounded like a hurt boyfriend or something pretty close to that. It didn't match this 2010 version of Steve at all but, deep down, that's how he felt. After everything, after five years, London finally returned to Hawaii and she was willing to avoid him - that hurt.

"Because." London regretted saying that the minute she heard how cold and flat it sounded. She had noticed, even though Steve's monosyllabic question was just as blank as her plain white tank top, that he was upset. She wasn't at her best either and probably that's what triggered that blunt reaction, but that didn't mean she could pour all of her crap on Steve. It wasn't right. London sighed. "It's been a long time, Steve..." He narrowed his eyes just a little but kept looking at London. "I guess- I guess I didn't know what to expect and..."

London's voice failed and Steve raised an eyebrow. "And?"

"Things changed, Steve. So many things happened during these past five years and I kept telling myself it would be alright, but I couldn't know for sure." At some point while she was talking, London started pacing, but then, all of a sudden, just like she started it, she stopped. "I changed. A big part of me changed." Steve knew she wasn't joking; he could see some of those changes and he knew what could have caused that but he wasn't enjoying the way that conversation was taking. They've been apart for so long, and they made a promise to see each other again and that was so not how he had pictured that moment. Things seem to be going sideways... "But I could only see my side. I couldn't possibly know what was going on with you... so, lately I've been thinking - how much **we** changed?"

Steve understood what she was asking. He had asked himself that question many times before, but that wasn't something he couldn't answer. Not alone. He knew how changed he was, but he didn't know about London.

She wasn't looking for an answer so, after speaking the inevitable question, London continued. "About half hour ago, I stepped out of an airplane. And I thought I knew what I was doing - I wasn't here when you returned but I'd keep my promise, no matter how late it was. But then I realized... Time passed, and it passed for you too. I was alright with my changes, but, when I thought about you and how you could have changed too... I wasn't sure of anything else anymore... I wasn't sure I could see you."

"Why not?"

London shifted her gaze to her shoes again for a second. This was hard... "Because it's Christmas!" She said looking back at him. Her voice was a little louder but she just couldn't hold the turmoil inside. "And I didn't give that much thought until I was in a taxi cab, going through Waikiki and I saw these happy couples and families walking around holding hands and with these wide open smiles on their faces! Time passed, Steve. One hell of a long time. You could have moved on!" Then, her voice changed to a whisper and she added: "I wasn't sure I was ready to find out..."

Steve shared her pain, and doubts. She didn't know it but he had been torturing himself with those thoughts for over four hundred days now. What if she had moved on? What if she found someone else? What if he never saw her again? But, when he heard her last words, he knew he was worrying over nothing. And so was she.

"London," he said taking a step forward and placing a hand on her cheek. After she said all those words that seemed to be eating her inside out, her eyes were once again analyzing her shoes.

She didn't look at Steve when he called her so he tipped her head up. Her eyes were again wet and it made his heart skip a beat.

London watched as his free hand went to his neck and he pulled something that was covered by the black T-shirt he was wearing. She held her breath when she saw what it was.

"There's only one direction I'd move on to," he said holding the silver necklace she gave him; her ring dangling in front of her eyes. "And that's towards you."

London blinked a couple of times, her eyes going from the ring to Steve and all the way back. She didn't process that information immediately because she felt like her brain stopped working; she was feeling a little dizzy when she noticed she was still holding her breath.

They weren't done.

London threw her hands around Steve's neck and hugged him again. Her heart was beating furiously, like it was trying to jump out of her chest. She was thrilled. And when Steve drew an inch away from her and covered her lips with his, London felt she had died and went to Heaven.

.

"Which hotel you're staying?" Steve asked when they pulled apart for air. His fingers combing her long and curly hair - very unusual to a Japanese descendant woman, but so incredibly charming.

"The Kahala Hotel."

"The Kahala?" Steve arched both eyebrows when she said that. It was one of the most luxury hotels in Oahu. "Really?"

"Yes, I came to spend the holidays and, if things went wrong with, you know, us, I'd enjoy my pain in a nice place," she said simply and with a smile that wasn't giving any signs of wearing off, at least until she checked the watch and learned it was already 6pm; actually, it was saying 12am, but that would be NC time, and she was in Hawaii now. "And that reminds me I gotta do the check-in," she said with a sigh as she disentangled herself from his embrace.

"Don't. Come stay with me," Steve suggested, trying to keep her from escaping his arms. He had her gone for so long and he didn't want to lose her again.

"This is very, very tempting even though I already paid for the room," she said weakly, but her face brightened a second later. "How about you come with me? We can stay there together. Unless you have other plans, of course."

"I don't have plamns," he said placing a soft kiss on her lips. "And, well, since you're not coming home with me, I'm taking your offer."

London laughed when Steve kissed her neck. "Alright... Shall we?"

"Yes, ma'am."

* * *

><p>London checked into the hotel at precisely 6:27pm, Hawaii Time. In North Carolina, it was 12:27am, meaning she was digging for a hot shower and a bed. But, even though she was super tired and she didn't have any sleep during her flight, she couldn't sleep. Not when Steve was there with her.<p>

"How long you'll stay?" he asked when they walked to her bedroom. Steve couldn't help but notice that ut was one huge room.

"I made plans for a week," London said from the bedroom, while Steve was still going through what seemed to be some sort of living room.

"Seriously?" he asked joining London in the bedroom, which, by the way, should have the largest bed he had ever seen. "Just a week?"

"I think I can stay a little longer," she said taking her flats off; her luggage untouched on a desk. "But I'll have to find another hotel..."

"Forget hotels," Steve said matter of factly as he closed the space between them with three fast steps and, once he had London back in his arms, he leaned for another kiss. "You'll stay with me."

"Oh, okay then," she whispered when he looked at her. "Since you _asked so nicely_..."

Steve grinned and tighten the hold around her waist and they both laughed an easy laugh when he twirled with her and they ended lying on the bed. Steve was on the bottom and he still had London in his arms.

"I missed you," he whispered while brushing a strand of hair from her face so he could have the perfect view of a face he waited so long to see again.

"I missed you too," London replied softly while running her fingers through Steve's short hair and kissing him softly. "_Mele Kalikimaka_..."

"Merry Christmas, beautiful." Steve's voice wasn't louder than a whisper, but it was powerful enough to make London's heart skip a beat.

"Sorry I came empty handed so, consider this," she said looking around. "Your present. A week staying in this fancy hotel and resort."

Steve shook his head. "You didn't come empty handed. London, you gave me the best present I could ever ask for, and it's nothing to do with this place, it's you." he said simply. "You're here, and having you back is the best Christmas gift ever. This is the best Christmas ever."

London smiled shyly and used her both hands to cover her face. When she looked back at Steve, he was watching her so intensely that she felt she was blushing, and that didn't happen in a very long time.

"I agree," she said quietly, her eyes locked on Steve's. "Best Christmas ever." London framed Steve's face with her both hands and kissed him right on the lips. Their kiss wasn't slow, but it was gentle; it was deep, but it was also passionate. It was a demonstration of how they missed each other, and how they appreciated being together again. It wasn't just a kiss, it was the reunion of two lovers that had been separated for too long. For way too long.

. . .


	17. Chapter 17

_Mahalo to everyone who's still reading this, especially to those who reviewed my last chapter. Thank you very much.  
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><p>London woke up slightly startled the next day. This new reality hadn't settle in yet; she still needed to get used to not waking up in a small cubicle with only a bed, a single window, no paintings on the wall amongst other things.<p>

She moved on the large bed and, for a split second, she felt her blood freeze in her veins when she felt, on her skin, the warmth of someone's body by her side. Her brain was working fast and, thanks to everything she had learned in the Army, London was this close to react when she turned her head and her eyes landed on the sleepy figure of Steve McGarrett. Just like that, all the memories from the day before returned and she relaxed. Closing her eyes, London sank further on the bed again as one thought kept echoing in her head - _how am I gonna tell him?_

She knew she would have to come clean sooner or later, but he couldn't think of a way to break the news. _"Hey, guess what? I joined the service!"_ Something was telling London that Steve would kick her sorry ass when he heard that, and then her father and brother would be receiving a letter saying London was KIA, during Operation 'Telling Steve about her new career choice'. Dear Lord, she was screwed.

But those thoughts were put temporarily on hold when she felt a soft move by her side and, when she turned to look at Steve, she found him with eyes slightly open as a smile grew on his face.

"Morning, angel..."

"Hey, sleeping beauty," London whispered softly, snuggling up to the warmth of Steve's body. "Did you sleep well?" she asked, running her fingers through his short hair.

"Sure I did," he said brushing a strand of dark hair away from her face and kissing her softly on the lips. Then, he looked at her and London saw something that shouldn't be there - it looked like concern. "How about you?"

"Great."

London knew instantly that Steve didn't buy that, not even for a second, and she had a fairly good idea why.

Ever since she returned from Iraq, she had been having nightmares; from the goddamned letter she read, saying that her brother was never coming home, to the brutal reality that she lived in Iraq. They were all equally horrible and disturbing, the only bright side was that she didn't have them every night but it would happen eventually, and she had one last night.

"Not so great," she admitted when she felt Steve's eyes staring into her soul. London let her head rest on Steve's arm, his natural scent numbing all her senses for a handful of seconds or so. "I had a bad dream, that's all..."

Steve cupped her face with one hand and his thumb brushed her cheek gently as his fingertips touched lightly her soft skin.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

London barely registered what Steve had said, she could only think about his warm touch - she missed his touch so badly.

"Not really," she replied rolling on top of him as he held her by the waist to keep her there. Her fingers running through his short hair, her fingertips touching his scalpel, their chests pressed together. London's eyes never left Steve; she wanted to burn that view in her memory. She had him back and she would not waste any minute talking about the last five years of her life, because that's what her nightmares were all about and Steve was all she dreamed of. Her hands stilled on both sides of his head and she let her head fall a bit and their foreheads were now resting together. "Not right now," she whispered softly.

For a moment, they didn't move or tried anything. They just stood there, on that huge hotel bed, holding onto each other for dear life. It was almost like they wanted to be sure that they were really there and it wasn't just a dream. After what could have been an eternity or maybe just seconds, Steve let go of her waist and reached for her face. His fingertips touched her skin ever so softly and, with every touch London felt her heart rate increasing rapidly and her breathing becoming shallow - she was struggling to take in enough oxygen and it was causing her to get slightly disorientating, but it made her feel even more euphoric if that made any sense.

Steve was trying to calm his emotions but they were alive, they had its on will and he just couldn't keep them at bay - honestly, he didn't want to. He had been controlling that for way too long and now, now, the only thing he wanted to keep was London next to him. He wanted every inch of the infinite treasure and beauty that was London to engulf him and stay with him forever. He wanted to be the only one in the world to know her completely, inside out. He wanted her to be his and his alone. He didn't want to have her away. Their eyes met and, just like London, Steve felt his head was getting slightly dizzy - she had taken his breath away.

The yearning for one another was so thick that it could be felt brushing and grinding all over each other's body, but still they didn't move. Lying on that bed, in each other's arms, all that Steve and London did was to hold the intense stare, taking in every little detail of that moment, so they didn't rush. They didn't want to forget that. They wanted to burn every single detail into their memory because they've been waiting so long.

The overwhelming desire and craving passing between them was filling the room and taking over their bodies so they couldn't concentrate on anything else. Their were aching for further contact, their skin burning beneath their clothes, their breath was incredibly ragged and strained despite the fact that nothing had even happened yet. They wanted to consume one another, their passion raw and heavy.

Finally, their lips crashed together and, without hesitation, London parted her lips open, allowing Steve's tongue to taste the sweetness of her kiss. He locked one arm around her waist and the other held the back of her head, his fingers entwined with her long black silky hair, as their tongues started dancing together, exploring every single inch of the familiar territory they both didn't visit in a very long time. It was like going back home after staying one lifetime away. It was just too good, no words could ever describe the feeling.

The kiss became deeper and deeper until it reached the inevitable moment when it just wasn't enough - they needed each other more than their lungs needed air.

Steve slid his hands under the white tank top London was still wearing. Against all odds, nothing happened last night. She was just too tired and Steve knew better than to take advantage of that. But now, the pieces of clothing hugging her body seem too offensive; Steve pulled apart for just a second to take London's top off but it was long enough for her to moan in frustration - which only added to his need and want. That and the fact that he found out she was wearing a light pink corset that was making her curves and her breasts pop out - she had been wearing that the entire time.

"Do you like it?" London asked cheerfully as she straddled him. Judging by the glow in Steve's eyes, it was quite obvious what the answer would be, but she liked the teasing, especially when she knew how that would end.

"If I like it? This should be illegal," he replied, propping himself up and sliding his arms around her waist while he pulled her closer to him. "You look way too good in it."

Neither one of the noticed they were grinning when their lips met. London locked her arms around his neck, capturing Steve's lips on hers again. She bit his lower lip softly only to quickly sooth it with the tip of her tongue, sending a shiver down Steve's spine.

Steve rolled with London on the bed so he ended on top of her. He pulled apart from her just a bit and the view of the smiley woman and her hair all over the pillow was just too mesmerizing - he was in awe.

Shifting his weight to his legs, Steve straightened his body, half sitting on his heels as his hands made its way to the hem of his T-shirt but her hands stopped him. London did as Steve and sat on the bed, her hands slowly making its way up, revealing Steve's very fit abdomen and broad chest. Her fingertips touched his skin ever so softly, making his skin burn at every contact.

Steve raised both arms, allowing London to slide his T-shirt off. He was just closing his eyes so she could take it off completely when he felt her warm and soft lips kissing his neck; maybe it was because he had his eyes closed and his other senses were more keen, but he felt like he had been his by a lightning and his body was burning, especially where her lips were making contact to his bare skin.

London felt Steve's body tense and she tossed his shirt somewhere behind him and placed both hands flat on his chest. His heart was pounding beneath her touch and she smiled, taking proud of the fact that she was the one causing that reaction but, mostly, because she could feel his strong heartbeats and, as she slid her forefinger through the thin white line on his chest, the only remains of the surgery she once performed, she smiled because he was there and he was very much alive.

Steve only watched as his urgency for that woman increased while she ran her nails down his chest and kissed softly the place where she once cut him open. They had barely started and he was on the edge.

Stopping her skilful hands before she reached his lower abdomen, Steve took advantage of the brief moment when she raised her eyes to meet his and kissed her passionately.

London closed her arms around Steve and she found herself scratching, not so gently, his bare back as he undid the zipper of her high-wasted skirt and, gently disentangling London from himself, Steve laid her on the bed so he could pull the skirt down with one smooth movement. A rush of electricity went through her body and ignite her center; she was already on fire.

With just as technique as Steve, London rolled with him so she could work on his cargo pants that came out just as easily as her skirt. She grinned when he looked astonished as his pants landed somewhere in the floor, along with his T-shirt, her skirt and tank top.

The amount of fabric was drastically reduced and it only helped to fuel their needs. Steve framed London's face and, biting her lower lip, he then took her lips on his. He just wanted to stay lost in that moment for the rest of eternity - or for the next five years, to compensate the time they had to be apart.

But his happiness ended up quite soon; Steve was just working on the corset London was wearing when he heard his phone ring. Actually, he didn't notice it was ringing at first, neither of them for that matter; it was only when it rang for the third time that London heard something. They stilled for a moment, trying to figure out what the hell was that when Steve recognized his ringtone. It felt like he had been hit with a baseball bat.

"I am assuming you need to take this," London said carefully when Steve let his head fall on the pillow with a sigh.

"I should," he admitted, but still didn't move, even though the phone was insistently ringing.

London knew what that meant; she found Steve working at a Saturday, that call could easily be a work call. Even though it was frustrating to no end, London placed a soft kiss on Steve's lips and climbed out of the bed.

"London, whe–" Steve was about to ask where she was going but he didn't. His eyes landed on the half naked figure walking out of the bedroom; she was wearing lace panties that matched the corset.

For a split second, Steve actually appreciated the view, but it all vanished when he heard his phone ringing again. If it was...

"It says is Danny Williams," London's voice came loudly from the next room and Steve sank in the bed. That was the exact same name that would fill his unspoken sentence. "And he's calling again," she said walking back into the room, tossing Steve his phone as she sat on the edge of the bed. "Must be important."

Steve shared a look with London, but answered the call anyways. He wanted to say some pretty bad things to his partner, but he managed to stay calm and came up with some acid: "What is it, Danno?"

London frowned at Steve; he was being way too harsh on whoever this Danno was.

"Would you just quit stalling and tell me what happened?" London's frown grew bigger but, just when she was about to tell him to relax, his face went serious. "Alright, I'll meet you there."

Steve disconnected the phone call and rubbed his face with his hands. That was just awesome. Danny called to tell him that they had a case. On a Sunday. After Christmas.

"I- uh... It was my partner," he explained looking up to meet London's dark eyes. They were curious and deep, but there was also something different – understanding. He hated to do that. He hated to walk out on a half naked gorgeous woman, who also happened to be the one he missed dearly the past years and that had just returned to his life. It was extremely unfair and wasn't the least bit funny. He wanted to stay in bed with her, the whole day, but that wouldn't be possible.

"And you have to go," she said simply, still sitting there and looking at him. "It's okay."

It was not okay. For both, it was exactly the complete opposite of okay. It was stupid. Whatever case they had, it was just really stupid. I mean, c'mon! Yesterday was Christmas!

Steve felt physical pain taking over her body when he got out of bed. He didn't want to leave that bed. Hell, he didn't want to leave London. He stopped by the end of the bed where she was sitting.

"London..." He started saying something but his voice failed him. His hands were resting on her waist and that little contact was more than enough for him to wince. He had her, and, honestly, he was a bit afraid that, once he walked out of that door, she would disappear again.

London caught something in his expression. His eyes were colored in deep blue, there were thin lines forming in his forehead, he had ran his tongue through his lips and was now pressing it together. She knew something was bothering him and he wasn't saying. Sliding her hands around his neck, she entwined her fingers on the back of it as their eyes locked.

"Wait for me, right here, would you?" Steve's voice was low and his tone was careful, which made London hold her breath unconsciously. They were feeling just the same. She didn't want to see him leaving, even if for two seconds... It was painful. But she knew better; she knew he had to go.

"Of course I'll wait," she replied softly, leaning forward to kiss him. Her lips were trembling and she just needed to make that stop. "Right here... I'm not going anywhere."

Steve looked deep in her eyes and, whatever he was seeing in there, spread this warmth through his whole body, giving him butterflies as he felt a flutter in his chest. There was something about London that he didn't quite understand completely and still, he never got tired of. She was addictive, and it was just too good.

"Great," he replied closing his arms around her waist and pulling her closer. Their lips met and, just as fast, they were once again, lost in each other's sinful taste.

Steve took one tiny step forward and his body found London's and that contact was just enough to bring back all the sensations and feelings and thoughts that were consuming their minds just minutes ago. Her barely dressed body grinding against his naked torso made the two of them realize they really needed each other. Really. That's why London let go of Steve.

Very much against her own will, she placed both hands in his chest and pushed him away; not too much, but just enough to create a nice gap between them that would cool things out.

"You... really need to go," she said a bit hesitating at first. Her eyes looking anywhere but Steve. "Just go and do what you gotta do... Just–" she quickly looked at Steve, and all signs of how much he needed her were right there, staring at her; his heart beating just as furiously as hers, his ragged breathing, his pupils were dilated amongst other things. Biting her lip, she sat back on the bed, watching as he gathered his clothes all over the floor. "Be fast."

Steve had his pants on and was holding his T-shirt but he stopped for a second and looked at the woman in the bed. She looked so much like one of those models who did lingerie advertising... That image would haunt him throughout the entire case; a constant reminder of what he had left, thanks to Danny and his crappy timing. He would give his partner one hell of a hard time today… Sure it wasn't Danny's fault – not really – but he needed someone to blame, and Danny was the perfect victim.

"I will be," he said putting his shirt on with a grin on his face. Then, he rushed to the nightstand on the side of the bed where he had fallen asleep and he took something. "I'm taking this with me," he said, showing her the necklace with the ring.

London smirked. She didn't say anything because Steve didn't let her. He just leaned forward, kissed her softly on the lips. He then stopped by the bedroom door where he winked at her, making London feel like she was ten years younger.

"Go get them, tiger."

Steve smiled at her. No one could imagine how he missed London. "See you soon, beautiful," he said softly before he walked to entrance door and out of it.

. . .

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><p><em><strong>AN:** Once again, I'm not entirely sure of this chapter but I couldn't think of a way to make it better. Sorry folks._


	18. Chapter 18

__Mahalo to everyone who has reviewed, alerted or favorited this story thus far. As an aspiring writer, it is great to see that you guys are enjoying this. Feedback and/or constructive critique are always welcome, so feel free to leave a comment or send me a PM! __

**A/N:**_ Just so you know, I won't focus on the case...  
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><p>"So, what happened?" Steve asked bluntly when he got to the place Danny had told him about ten minutes earlier.<p>

If his mood wasn't good by the time he left the Kahala hotel, right now it was terrible. They were called at the Halawa Correction Facility and, judging by everyone's face, this was not good.

"Prison break," Chin said simply as Steve stood by his side. Danny and Kono joined them shortly.

"Prisoner Edward Howard escaped prison some time between yesterday night and this morning," Kono explained and Steve furrowed his brows.

"Wait a minute, Ed Howard? He's a maximum security prisoner. How the hell he escaped?"

"That is the million dollar question," Danny jumped into the conversation when he saw Steve's expression – he had his aneurysm face and it became a thousand times more evident when Steve's eyes met Danny's. The blonde detective was willing to bet his car that it had something to do with him calling Steve. "That's why we're here, today, in this glorious Sunday morning." There sarcasm in Danny's words was not subtle at all. "Nonetheless, we have less than twenty hours to get this guy..."

That would be one long ass day. Ed Howard was responsible for the murder of nine people in the State of California; he also would be taken to California at 5:00 am the next day, since he had a trial Monday evening. Now, he was on the loose and they would have to find a highly dangerous serial killer in less than twenty four hours. That was terrific.

Inwardly, Steve asked himself why they couldn't get a simple case – not that there were anything like simple in his line of work, but that? Oh hell…

"Okay… let's talk to the guards responsible for his security and see what they can tell us."

.

"So, where were you?" Danny asked as soon as the two partners were on their way inside the Correction Facility.

"How is this relevant to this case?" Steve asked, increasing his pace to avoid that question. He'd been waiting for that ever since London said it was Danny who was calling him.

London. He was already missing that woman...

"It is not, but I'm curious… I mean, these past days you weren't exactly the poster boy for social interaction, or anything, really… so, it was more than just a surprise when I went to your house this morning and you weren't there!" Steve glanced at the short man walking by his side; he had almost being hit with one of his hands when he threw then in the air all of a sudden. Staring blankly at Danny, Steve knocked on the door of the head of security. "So, where were you? Is there a 'Rambo' marathon in the cinema that I haven't heard about?"

Steve had just turned to look at Danny and the blonde thought he'd have an answer when the doors went wide open and a man in uniform showed up.

"You must be Five-0, right? I've been told you were coming..."

Danny addressed one last look at Steve and followed him inside; but their talk was far from being over.

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><p>As soon as Steve walked out of the room, London found herself completely lonely in that room. She was used to being alone, so it wasn't the lack of people that got her feeling like that. Is the lack of Steve.<p>

She fell back on the bed and just stayed there. She was back and it almost felt like no time had passed. Almost. Lying in that bed, in that quiet room, it allowed her mind to drift back to what she was thinking before Steve woke up. The Army.

"How the hell I'm gonna tell him?" London spoke it loudly thinking that maybe if she voiced it, she could get that question out of her head and think of an answer to it, but it didn't work. If anything, she kept hearing that question repeatedly, almost like an echo in her head and she didn't think there would be an easy way to tell him that.

_"Perhaps Steve won't be so mad,"_ London thought to herself as she got out of bed and walked to the bathroom. _"Perhaps he'll take that easily. Perhaps I'm just overreacting..."_ But, when she felt the water pouring on the back of her head, London knew it wouldn't be that simple.

About an hour later, London was still torturing herself with that thought so she did the only thing she could think of to get her mind cleared. She left the hotel and went for a walk.

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><p>After a couple of hours talking to the whole staff of the Correctional Facility and going after the four other men that were responsible for providing extra security on Ed Howard that weren't on duty that day, Steve and Danny got some useful information and went back to the Five-0 Headquarters, where they were now trying to find a possible hiding place, or something like that. And they were working on that when Danny went back to that subject.<p>

"So... Will you tell me where were you on Christmas Day?"

"No, I won't," Steve replied flatly as he kept working.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

Danny glared at Steve but the tall man just ignored it, making Danny arch an eyebrow. Steve was hiding something and he was planning on finding out what was it, grilling the SuperSEAL like he often did with Danny, but then, he caught a glance of something around his neck. Was that a necklace? It sure looked like a necklace…

"Why are you wearing this?" Danny asked curiously. He knew it should be the necklace with the fancy diamond ring that he got from his friend – London. But Danny never saw Steve actually wearing that, especially when he was on the field. "You hear from your SEAL friend, didn't you? About London?"

Only the mention of her name made Steve forget about the work for a while and his thoughts drifted back to the hotel. He just needed to put an end to that goddamned case so he could see her again. "Danny, can you just focus on this case? Please?"

Even though he added the "_please_", Steve's words were flat and a bit harsh, and it made Danny address a suspicious glance at his partner – he was avoiding the question and something was bothering him, and he was willing to find out why and what was it.

Danny stopped asking useless questions and, instead, he used his keen detective skills to find something that would give Steve away and it worked just like he was expecting. When Danny stopped talking and started observing, he saw details that he didn't see before. Details regarding his partner. Danny knew Steve just enough to tell when something was different and he didn't believe he missed all the signs; his shirt wasn't impeccably ironed, his hair was slightly messed and he was more than just a little grumpy.

"What are you hiding?" Danny asked bluntly; this time, he wasn't settling for anything less than a straight answer.

Steve stopped what he was doing immediately and looked at Danny; his face was blank. "What part of the '_focus on the case_' you didn't understand?"

"Kono and Chin are following some leads on who might have arranged the escape and helped Ed Howard outside, I'm guessing you just found a probable hiding location. We're good," Danny said matter-of-factly, ignoring Steve's deadly glare. "You can stare at me for as long as you want, this is not working anymore." Danny shifted and Steve crossed his arms across his chest; the blonde detective was behaving all serious and tough and that made Steve just be quiet and wait for what was to come. "You never wear this necklace. You're in a horrible mood and, if you were in the Navy, you'd be severely repressed if you showed up to work like this, so I'm asking – what happened?" Danny went silent for a moment as he tried to read something on Steve's face. Nothing. The man had the perfect game face on, he couldn't read anything. "Bad news regarding London?" he asked carefully. Steve had been particularly hard to deal with this morning and now, Danny was sort of preparing himself for the consequences of whatever that was bothering Steve. A sane Steve sometimes meant physical injuries; now, an upset Steve? God knows what that could mean.

Steve's humor wasn't exactly perky; he had been moody and grumpy the whole day but only with Danny, that was quite understandable though. Steve would never let out his frustrations on someone else, but Danny was something else entirely different. He knew he was a bit nosy and his mouth seemed to have its own life, but, even though the two men often argued, they cared about each other. It was like a relationship between brothers; they would argue, maybe they would even put one hell of a fight, but in the end, they had one another in such high esteem and that's what matters.

So, just because Danny was meddling, prying into something that Steve could easily say 'it was none of his business', Danny wasn't just recklessly trying to pick up a fight or get into some argument. No. Danny wanted the best for Steve, especially if he had bad news about his friend. So, as soon as the question slipped out, Danny watched, waiting for Steve's reaction, but he barely had any.

Steve sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He hated when Danny got all courageous and brave on him because he knew he wouldn't let go. "If I tell you, you'll stop grilling me and actually do what I tell you and **focus on the case**?"

To say that Danny was surprised with Steve's calmness was an understatement. He was waiting for something more - dramatic, and his blank expression, definitely got him wondering. "Yes, I will."

"Alright. Fine." Steve took a deep breath and locked his eyes on Danny's. He didn't believe he was going to talk about this right now. "I heard from her, no bad news. She's fine, everything's fine, so let's end this."

It wasn't like Steve didn't want Danny to know about London and that she was back; he just didn't want to be reminded that she was, once again, at arms reach, so close and he had to deal with some scumbag. Danny got lucky that they got that case. If it was something not that urgent, Steve would concentrate all his frustration on the blonde... But, since it wasn't exactly Danny's fault and he wanted to put an end to that pretty soon, he just avoided any discussions with his partner.

Danny crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Steve. "That's lousy. You didn't answer my question."

"That was not lousy and I answered one of your questions, now, stop talking and start working."

Well, maybe Danny didn't get that lucky. Steve just couldn't help the acid and somewhat cold answers every now and then. This man, Edward Howard, choose the worst time ever to escape prison. And the worst place also.

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><p>London walked with no destination for almost an hour until she reached a very familiar place. She smiled when she realized where her feet had taken her. The Hawaii Medical Center.<p>

"Were it all started," London thought to herself.

She stood in front of the building for long enough before deciding to go inside. She didn't know if the people she knew were still there, but that place was a huge part of her story – not to mention it was where she met Steve.

Thinking about that brought a lot of conflicted emotions; she would never forget the image of Steve when he was rushed inside the hospital. He almost died. Remembering that made a shiver go down her spine and it wasn't because of the cool weather. But then, her mind drifted to the night he woke up. By that time, London could remember thinking that seeing him awake was the best thing – now she knew it was even better.

As London walked through the doors into that very familiar place, a familiar face that happened to be nearby welcomed her.

"My, my... I cannot believe my eyes..."

London opened a huge smile when she heard that voice. She missed that place and all of her friends a lot more than she imagined.

"Nick!"

"London! It is so good to see you."

Nick's arms were open and London couldn't not hug him. He was a very dear friend and one of the few people who fully supported London when she decided to continue her career in the Army. Not even her father was that comprehensive; Hunter was, but not Dad. Actually, her father was the last person to accept her decision... Thus far.

Thinking about that made London gently push Nick away. Steve. Army. Telling him. It was all back, even though they never left her thoughts.

It's been more than a while since Nick last saw London, but he knew something was bugging her. He recognized all signals in her face: her lips were pressed together tightly, she looked down for about three seconds before finally looking up with the most distant look in her eyes. Nick frowned inwardly when he learned that; he didn't to see her like that, after all, she was a friend and had been through more than enough, and, adding more to that was just really unfair – not that life was fair but still. No one should have to go through that much and still receive more crap. No one, and definitely not London.

London also caught something in Nick's eyes. He seemed to be slightly worried and it was very likely that he would get a bit protective and she didn't want it. London liked Nick a lot, but she didn't want to answer the question she knew he'd ask: _"what's wrong?"_. London was seriously avoiding that question for good five years now. In her opinion, there was no point in talking about what was wrong; no one could fix it so why bother? So, she looked around and asked with the most casual tone:

"How's everything here?"

Nick knew what London was doing. In fact, anyone would know she was doing – being elusive – but, because Nick had no idea what she had been through in the Army during these past years they've been apart, he decided it was a good thing if he allowed her that victory now.

"Everything's fine, actually," he replied just as casually. "Chief Pryce is still Chief, there's a new cardio surgeon – he's not you or have your skills and everything but he's alright – since your beloved Dr. Weiss was fired..."

"No way!" she cut him loudly.

"Yes, way," Nick replied rather cheerfully. "Claire is still here, she's head nurse now."

"Is she here? I mean, now?"

"Sure... C'mon, let's find her."

London smiled at Nick and followed him inside. It was all the same, but at the same time, so different. Everything was like that lately – it was like nothing changed, but it did; some things were way too different.

.

Just like the days when she was a resident, London had lost track of time in the hospital.

She was so caught up with seeing everyone again and returning to that place she really liked and missed that she didn't see when the sun set and the night fell. She spend the day chatting with many people in that hospital, watched a major surgery from the gallery that required Neuro, Cardio and Trauma surgeons on it and even did some stitches on a kid that had fell off the swing.

London was just catching up with Claire at a nurse station next to the ER entrance doors when she heard something that made her blood go cold in her veins. Something and someone.

When she heard the loud call _"we need a doctor!"_, London felt the world spinning faster and faster and she couldn't make her legs run fast enough to the ER. The voice floated through London and she felt like her blood suddenly stopped running through her veins leaving her bone cold. She had no doubts that it was Steve who had just entered the hospital and shouted those words. And his tone was damn urgent.

. . .


	19. Chapter 19

_Mahalo to everyone who's still reading this story, especially to those who reviewed my last chapter. Thank you very much._

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><p>It was almost 10 pm when the Five-0s got their hands on Ed Howard. As they already knew, the guy had plenty of help to escape the Correction Facility and even more to hide afterwards.<p>

Steve and his team found Ed Howard in a cabin in the middle of a jungle and, even though they managed to take the prisoner in custody, they had some misfortunes along the way.

"Hang on, Danny. We're almost there." Steve was driving as fast as he could with his partner making faces on the passenger seat; he had been shot on his right side.

They requested Medevac but the air ambulance was taking Ed Howard, who was stupid enough to trigger a Claymore mine he set himself shortly after shooting Danny. The guy was in terrible shape but, truth be told, the Five-0s would not lose sleep over that, after all, he was a murdered and had shot Danny with an assault rifle. Ed Howard wasn't worth it.

"Hang on..."

Steve broke several traffic laws but that was the very last of his concerns at the moment. Danny was applying pressure on his wound but he was still bleeding and his appearance wasn't the best.

"Oh God... I'm not dying, Steven! At least not yet!"

Danny didn't know if he was more concerned about his bullet wound or about how fast Steve was driving. He was struggling to keep pressuring his abdomen where he was hit by the moron they were after and to keep himself steady and, even more important, not getting sick or passing out.

Thankfully, his agony came to an end pretty soon and he was damn relieved when Steve stopped his Camaro in front of the hospital. Only when he wasn't no longer speed racing, Danny realized how bad he was; he was starting to feel both dizzy and cold – Danny wasn't a doctor, but he knew just enough to know that hypothermia wasn't a good thing.

"Steve..."

Before Danny could ask his help, Steve was already by his side, helping him to stand and walk to the ER.

Steve knew that Danny was shot with a large caliber weapon and he was really worried with the blood loss and all the complications that could come with that. Danny was his partner but, more than that, he was a friend, he was part of his _Ohana_ now.

"We need a doctor!" Steve shouted as soon as they put one foot inside the ER of the Hawaii Medical Center, providing support to Danny. Steve also noticed his skin was getting colder and he knew it was a sign that he had lost a lot of blood so said those words almost at the top of his lungs. Danny needed medical assistance, and he needed it fast.

"Thank you," Danny whispered weakly by his side, struggling and failing to keep a steady pace. "I now have a hole in my body and I'm half deaf."

Steve rolled his eyes as a nurse ran towards them with a wheel chair. "You are unbelievable, Danno." Steve's tone was slightly harsh, but he was also glad to hear Danny's complaints. He made to the hospital in time.

"Sir, what happened?" asked a doctor while Danny was transferred from the wheel chair to a gurney.

Steve was just about to answer his question when he heard a familiar voice behind him.

"Steve!"

He turned quickly to find London standing right behind him and she seemed to be in distress.

"Are you alright?" She asked while scanning him with her eyes; London almost fell back when she saw the blood in his hands and arms and shirt – he was still wearing the black T-shirt but she could see where the blood left darker spots. "Oh God... Whose blood is that? What happened?" London's voice was a bit louder by the time she asked the last question, which was the exact same thing that the doctor that was waiting to check on Danny had asked.

"My partner was shot," Steve said, his eyes shifting from London to the other guy he had no idea who he was.

"How long?" the two doctors asked at the same time, making Danny raise his head a little to know what was going on.

"About twenty minutes ago," Steve answered after thinking a while.

"Any medical care?" asked the male doctor; London was wearing a pair of gloves and she soon started checking on the wound.

"None."

"This is big," London whispered, almost like speaking to herself; the male doctor was no one other than Dr. Craig, the same Trauma surgeon that London worked with when she was still a resident. That's probably why he didn't kicked her out of there immediately.

London stopped examining Danny and looked at Steve. "What exactly were you two doing?" she asked quietly yet alarmed.

"I told you," he replied, using the same low tone. "We had a case–"

Steve didn't even have time to finish his explanation when he heard Dr. Craig speaking to the nurses that were assisting him. "He lost a lot of blood... Let's start an IV line and I want a unit of O neg now."

One of the two women shouted a "got it" and ran through the doors of the trauma room that Danny was currently in. Steve could hear some complaining every now and then, muffled by the oxygen mask his partner was wearing but, other than that, he seemed to be okay.

"He'll be fine, right?" Steve had taken London by the arm and walked a couple of steps away from the gurney.

"I can't answer that, Steve... I'm not his doctor. I don't work here, remember?"

"Just give me your professional opinion," Steve pleaded when Danny moaned in pain.

"Hold on," London said and quickly stood by Dr. Craig, watching what he was doing.

She wasn't even touching Danny when the doors went wide open and the nurse returned with three units of O neg instead of two. But the extra blood unit wasn't all that she brought with her; she also brought Chief Pryce.

"Miss Alexander," he said rather seriously while looking at her and then making a small move with his head, indicating he wanted a word with her.

That was just like London. She wasn't even working at that place anymore but it was not stopping her from being called by the Chief of Surgery.

She quickly glanced at Steve before walking past him, where Chief Pryce was requesting her.

"What is going on here?"

"A police officer was shot," she answered innocently.

"That's not what I meant," Chief Pryce raised an eyebrow while looking at London. "Mr. McGarrett is here," he pointed and she sighed.

"It is his partner on that gurney, sir.," London said simply. "I'm just being supportive."

"I see," he said calmly. "And the glove covered in blood is just you being supportive." London's eyes dropped to her hands and she noticed she didn't take the gloves off. She was thinking of something to tell Chief Pryce but he just waved. "Don't bother," he said with a smile. "I know how you work; I know what you'll say."

London smiled back; she had lost count of how many times she was called by Chief Pryce back when she worked here and it was always over the same thing – sometimes, London did things that were maybe too bold in order to save or to help a patient, but he never shut that off; it was part of her that attitude and he respected that and even admired it. And, even though he didn't like losing London when she finished her residency, he knew she'd be better off where she was heading to. With that personality of hers, the Army would fit her better, and she'd make a difference to the lives of those who were fighting for the country.

Chief Pryce was just about walking out when his pager went off; muttering some excuses, he rushed to the closest nurse station to answer the phone.

London didn't pay much attention to that, instead, she discarded the gloves and walked back inside the room where she found Dr. Craig finishing cleaning the open wound so he could take Danny to have a CAT scan of his abdomen.

They were all just waiting for that when Dr. Craig's pager went off. He checked it quickly and his expression went from relaxed to alert in no time and London started to wonder what was going on. Chief Pryce was paged and he hurried to the phone, now Dr. Craig was paged and he instantly looked around like he was trying to think about what to do.

"What's going on?" asked a very dizzy Danny. It was the first time Danny actually spoke some coherent words; Dr. Craig gave him some morphine to relieve some of his pain while he cleaned the open wound and stopped the profuse bleeding. That and the IV line were making him feel better.

Dr. Craig looked at the monitors and he was just about to ask the nurse to call a doctor when his eyes landed on London.

"Dr. Alexander," he said suddenly and rather cheerfully, making London look at him confused. She wasn't Doctor Alexander there. She was just London. "I requested a CAT scan for his abdomen. Look for any internal bleedings, damage, the usual, alright?"

"What?" London said rather quickly and a bit startled. "I don't work here anymore!"

"But I've seen you work, I trust you," Dr. Craig said seriously. "I have an emergency and I know you will handle this better than anyone."

London's eyes were locked on Craig's; she could see he wasn't joking about assigning her to that patient. She hesitated for a while but agreed. "I'm gonna need Claire."

"Call Jennings," he ordered the nurse that was close to the intercom. "Enjoy your vacations," Dr. Craig said with a small smile before he left the room in a hurry.

_"Vacations,"_ London thought to herself as she wore the yellow gown the nurse was holding for her. She had just returned from a war zone – treating a bullet wound wasn't exactly the biggest challenge she faced in her career up until now; it should be easy.

"Hi," she said looking at Danny over her shoulder as she took a pair of gloves from a box. "I'm Doctor Alexander and, I know it's quite unexpected, but I'll take good care of you, I promise."

London smiled at Danny; he was about to say something but Claire walked into the room so he postponed it.

"I knew you wouldn't resist." Claire had this big white smile on her face as she spoke with London.

"Oh, you know it," London replied shoving the gloves on her pocket; the same bright smile on her face. "Could you please put some clean bandages on Mr. Williams?" Claire nodded and started working on Danny's abdomen while London wore the pair of gloves. "I'm gonna take a blood sample," she told Danny as she reached for a syringe. "I just want to be sure you're alright," London explained when Danny kept looking at her pointedly.

"I'm gonna request a CBC and check how's the CAT scan status," London told Claire quietly when she filled two small tubes with Danny's blood. The head nurse just waved her head; London knew that Claire didn't need to be there, she could just assign some other nurse to assist but she didn't, and London was super grateful for that. "I'll be right back," she softly before turning to face Danny and giving him a smile. "Nurse Jennings here will be with you. Anything you need, talk to her. I'll be back in a minute." Offering Danny a reassuring smile, London walked to the door and out of it.

.

As soon as Claire finished wrapping Danny with clean bandages, he raised his hand to take the oxygen mask off.

"Sir.."

"I'm good," Danny said reassuringly when Claire stood by his side. "I'm alright, thanks."

Claire glanced at him then at Steve; she remembered him and, well, maybe Mr. Williams was a little like McGarrett.

Steve's eyes found Claire's and he just gave her a short nod, silently apologizing and saying "I get this". Claire understood the message and gave them a little space – as much as that trauma room allowed her.

"You're gonna give the nurse a hard time too, Danno?"

Danny waved a hand at Claire and she just smiled at him, a smile that said "you're not the first and won't be the last to challenge doctor's orders".

"So," Danny said looking back at Steve; his voice still a bit weak. "Is that...?"

Steve rolled his eyes when he saw Danny pointing the door that London had just walked through.

"Yes, Danny," Steve said a little annoyed. He knew what Danny was implying. "That is."

Danny chuckled softly before holding his right side; it was an involuntary movement since the morphine was still keeping the pain away. "Smooth... Now I know why you were so grumpy and moody the whole day..."

Steve just shook his head at his partner. At some point, his eyes met Claire's for a split second and he felt his cheeks getting warm; the look in her face and the way she was struggling not to smile reminded him from some time in his past. A time when he wasn't so strict, detached some would say; a time that didn't seem to be just five years ago...

"Why you didn't say she was back?"

Danny's groggy voice brought Steve back from his memories.

"Why?" Steve asked more than slightly amused, crossing his arms across his chest. "I didn't know I should tell you everything about my personal life, Danno... By definition, personal means private, and private means that I don't have to share it with the whole world."

Danny tried to shift on the gurney but Steve held him still when he saw the blood stain growing on the bandage that Claire had just put.

"I'm not whole world," Danny protested but he didn't fight Steve's arms that were keeping him from moving. His voice had this hint of hurt though. "I'm your partner!"

Even though it sounded a lot like Danny, Steve thought the morphine had something to do with that.

"Alright," Steve said giving up. If he knew his partner – and he did – Danny wouldn't stop until he got some answer that he judged good enough. "Alright... I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

Danny laid back on the gurney and took a deep breath. Automatically, Steve checked the IV line that was sending fluids back to his partner's body; even now, Danny still looked really pale. Steve couldn't measure it, but he didn't think he or Danny would like to know how much blood the blonde lost.

"When?" Danny asked with his eyes still closed. He cracked his left eye open when Steve remained silent for the next five seconds or so; it was kinda hard keep track of time when you have morphine in your system.

"Yesterday," Steve answered simply. He didn't like discussing his private life, much less in a hospital, with a nurse whom he knew and who also knew about his prior involvement with London – it was sort of embarrassing.

"What a nice Christmas gift," Danny said chuckling. "I guess Santa's standards are declining..."

Steve arched an eyebrow at Danny but the detective didn't acknowledge that. He had put the oxygen mask back on and was taking deep breaths from it. He should have been in more pain and discomfort than he was showing.

The room was suddenly immersed in a relative quietness. There were a couple of machines on – one checking Danny's heart and the oxygen thing – and the air conditioner was on so there was this constant beeping and some buzzing but, other than that, there was no other sound. Danny was lying quietly on his gurney and Claire was also silent, randomly checking supplies. The stillness made Steve realize it's been over five minutes since London left.

He didn't fear losing her in that hospital but something was twisting inside him so he walked to the large window with three long, silence and determined steps.

Steve peaked through the blinds that were shut; he stayed there for about seven seconds but it was long enough for him to see something that made him frown inwardly and outwardly. A man walked directly towards London who was leaning at the counter, talking to a nurse and filling a chart.

The Five-0 leader watched the whole scene. He saw it when the man's hand lingered longer than it was necessary on her shoulder as he got London's attention, the wide open smile on her face when she turned to face him, the tight hug that also seemed to last longer than necessary. It all made something in his guts twist and turn but, what was really bothering Steve was the fact that he had seen that man before. He didn't know everything about him but he knew him.

The man who was having a very happy – maybe too effusive – conversation with London was from the Navy; he had been reassigned to Pearl not too long ago and, before that, he had never been to Hawaii. Not according to his file, or what he told Steve anyways. But they seemed pretty close, like they were friends of some sort... That said, one question was pounding on Steve's head insistently and he couldn't come up with an answer: _How did she know him?_

. . .


	20. Chapter 20

__Mahalo to everyone who has reviewed, alerted or favorited this story thus far.__

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><p>London had went to the first floor to personally take Danny's blood sample for analysis and the upper to ask why the scan requested by Dr. Craig was taking so long that it took her over five minutes to get back to the trauma room.<p>

She had quickly stopped by the reception counter to get a chart to fill with Steve's partner's information when someone approached her.

"Captain?"

Being referred by her rank in the Army made London's blood go cold in her veins instantly – the thought that had been hunting her ever since she returned was now back. She was about to look for Steve to see if he was around when she recognized the voice.

"Lieutenant," she replied with a smile when she turned to face the man that had called her.

He was exactly like she remembered him. Around 6', dark blonde hair, expressive brown eyes, he wasn't as tanned as he was when she last saw him but he still had this sort of intimidating yet very appealing thing going on that made London smile inwardly — he reminded her of Nathan - not the looks because they couldn't be more different on the outside, but the inside, the manners, the personality, those were oddly alike - and she missed her brother terribly.

London met the Navy Lieutenant, Gregory Bennett, about six months ago, when she was in Iraq, and so was he.

"What are you doing here?" London asked when he closed the space between them and hugged her – she hugged him back.

"I've been reassigned to Pearl," he said when they pulled apart. "After Iraq, I requested transfer to a Naval Base..."

London didn't say a word for a minute. She operated Lieutenant Bennett and other two men of his team in Iraq.

"Nice," she said with a smile. It was really good to know he wouldn't be deployed again; not because she had feelings for him but because his surgery was easily among the top ten of her toughest works thus far. They were in the middle of nowhere and he had multiple fractures, not to mention his spine was affected, along with his lungs and heart — he tried to protect one of his men who was hit by a larger caliber projectile when a bomb exploded nearby. None of the doctors and nurses had the slightest idea of how he survived. It should be a miracle.

"Speaking of which, how are you doing?" London asked; her trained eyes studying the man head to toe.

"I'm good. I'm really good, actually... And it reminds me that I never thanked you or the other surgeons for—"

"Oh, don't," London said waving that off before he could finish what he was saying. "It's okay. I'm sure I'm speaking for all of us when I say we're really glad to help."

Gregory smiled shyly at her. "Thanks anyways... And you, what are _you_ doing here? Gave up on the Army already?" he asked playfully. "The Navy would welcome you warmly."

Even though London smiled, she wasn't exactly happy; not because of his words, but because that was it again. London had been thoroughly trying to avoid that subject but, it didn't matter how hard she tried, it was always there. She couldn't hide from it forever.

"No," she said, holding onto the half smile that she had on her face. "No, I haven't. I returned last Wednesday and I'm sort of having vacations before..."

"Going back again," Gregory finished the sentence that London couldn't say out loud. She knew she'd be called back but that didn't mean she was thrilled about it. It was a bittersweet situation. She loved what she was doing, but she hated leaving her family... Leaving Steve.

"Yeah," she said looking back at the Lieutenant in front of her. "I needed a small break, you know."

"Doesn't look like you're having any break whatsoever," he replied with a smirk, pointing at the gown she was wearing and the chart she was holding.

"Yeah... This is a special assignment," London replied with a smile. Then, she glanced at the trauma room where Steve was waiting, along with her patient, Steve's partner, Danny Williams. It didn't really surprise her when she found Steve looking at her.

"Your boyfriend?"

Gregory's question brought London's attention back to him. "Yes. No. I don't know... It's complicated."

"Because he's a Navy guy?"

"What? No. How do you know...?"

"I know him. Steven McGarrett." London's eyes widened at that revelation. That was unexpected. "Nice guy."

"Yeah…" London rambled; if she wasn't convinced that she needed to stop stalling and tell Steve about her decision to join the service before, she was now. She really didn't want him to know that from someone else.

"Doctor Alexander." The soft voice of a nurse caught her attention and she turned to look at him. "The scan is ready for your patient."

"Oh. Thank you, Evans."

The young nurse nodded at her and went to assist another doctor who was asking for help.

"Look, Gregory, I need to get back to my patient but, will you have a day-off soon? I'd like to see how your recovery is." It's not always that she got to see how a major surgery made on the desert turned out.

"Sure," Gregory said simply. "Can I have your number so I can give you a call when I'm off duty?"

"Of course," London said taking a piece of paper from behind the counter and writing down her number. "Here."

"Thanks," he replied as he put her number in his pocket. "It was really nice seeing you, Captain."

"Please," London said quickly. "I'm not Captain here. Just call me London."

"Alright, London... See you around."

"Bye."

As soon as Gregory turned his back to London, she took a deep breath to get back to the trauma room. What just happened was a huge wake-up call, yelling at her "_you need to tell Steve_". It was like she was living two different lives that were this close to collide. Inhaling deeply one last time, she started her short walk towards the Trauma Room 03 and she was determined to tell Steve about the Army as soon as they left the hospital.

.

Steve had been quietly standing close to the window for long enough to Danny get intrigued.

"Hey, you," Danny called from his gurney and Steve turned to look at his partner. "What's wrong? Why the funny face?"

Steve didn't notice but his inward frown was now visible on the outside as well, probably after London acknowledged he had been looking at her.

"Nothing," Steve replied automatically as he took a few steps away from the window.

"Are you serious? C'mon, man! What is i–"

Danny didn't get to finish his sentence because London walked back into the room.

"Hi there," she said with a smile when she stood by Danny's bed. "How are you feeling, Mr. Williams?"

"Good, good," he said shifting slowly in the gurney. London noticed he should be tired of being on the same position so she helped him, so he could change to something in the middle of sitting and lying down. "Just– do you really need to call me... Mr. Williams? Makes me feel like I'm a sixty year old man."

London smiled at him. She lost count of how many times she heard that. Steve himself and his father also said almost the same thing.

"You're... London, right?"

"That would be correct," she replied without letting go of her smile as she checked his vital signs and the IV line.

"I heard about you. It is nice meeting you," Danny said smiling back at her. His eyes met Steve's and he could see his partner rolling his eyes behind the hand that was covering part of his face.

"You did? Wow... Well, I heard some things about you as well and it is great meeting you too," London said rather cheerfully. She had followed Danny's eyes and the vision of Steve pinching the bridge of his nose was really amusing – way better than the frown she faced when she was talking to Gregory... "I obviously hoped that we were somewhere else, not in a hospital, but I guess we can't have everything, right?"

"Helps if I say I'm used to it?"

"Really?" London was now genuinely curious. She exchanged a glance with Claire, quietly telling her to get the portable heart monitor, which she understood perfectly. "How so?"

"Comes with the territory."

London saw Danny's head moving towards Steve and she couldn't help but chuckle when the tall man protested.

"Really? Danno? You were shot once. One time and that was a hundred years ago."

"I still have the scar..."

"Alright, guys. Guys!" London was finding that way too amusing but she needed to get her job done. "I hate to jump in and spoil this lovely interaction, but the scan is ready…"

"Okay," Danny said leaning back in his gurney. His wound was starting to hurt again.

The two women were on their way out when London noticed Steve was still in the room and appearing more than just a little concerned. London touched Claire's arm and signaled her to keep going to the elevator and she'd meet her in a moment.

"Hey... We'll take care of your partner," London turned to talk to Steve who had been in the background and, except for the last minute or so, he hadn't say a word. "You have my word we'll do our best."

"He has a daughter, London... She's nine."

London was not expecting that, so she couldn't hide the shock when she learned that little detail they kept from her, but even so, she was positive that Danny would be fine.

"Okay, this is a little unexpected but I can handle this. Besides, you know… if anything happens, if I find anything that raises a yellow flag, I'll let you know immediately. Just, trust me on this, okay?"

"You know I trust you..."

"Good," she said, giving him a reassuring smile. "Now come on... There's a waiting room close to where I'll do his exam, you can stay there."

Steve looked around and then to the doors. "My team is coming..."

"Team. Uh– Okay. It's alright, come on."

Steve followed London when she practically ran towards the reception desk. She told the woman who was sitting behind a computer that if someone came looking for Steve McGarrett or Danny Williams, she was supposed to tell them to go to the third floor, he would be in the waiting room. Shortly before the woman nodded in agreement, London heard Claire calling her.

"Elevator's here!"

"Let's go," she told Steve and the two of them ran across the ER and into the elevator.

* * *

><p>London noticed Danny was moving a lot more than he was two minutes ago.<p>

"Mr. Williams? What's wrong?"

"It's hurting." Even the way he spoke those two simple words showed London he was in pain. That wasn't a surprise. Actually, London was quite impressed with his strength; she learned a lot about weapons and bullets and she was sure that he was hit something way bigger than a 9mm and that was painful.

"Alright, hold on a second, okay?" she told Danny and then she turned to the small cabinet and took a small bottle and a syringe.

Whatever it was, it worked quite fast. Seconds later the pain was bearable.

"I like it," he said with a smile on his face. "Can I have a prescription for that?"

London frowned. "May I ask why would you want that?"

"Because Steve can cause me real physical pain sometimes," Danny said half seriously, half joking, but ended up with an open smile on his face.

"Right, I'll see what I can do about that but no prescriptions for now," London said amused. It wasn't exactly the best occasion to meet someone, but she liked Danny. He was nice.

"How did you guys meet? You and Steven."

London wondered what Danny knew about her and Steve... "Well, it reminds me a lot of how we met. First time I saw him, he was a patient in this hospital."

"Seriously?"

Danny addressed a curious glance at London and she had to make him lay down again because he was trying to sit. "Seriously. I guess you're a bit alike..."

"What? Me and Rambo? Alike? No way."

London couldn't hold back a laugh when Danny called him Rambo, after all, Steve was Navy, not... Army.

"Okay, I'm gonna ask you to stand still," she said changing the subject quickly. "Don't move and we'll be out of here faster, okay?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Okay, he's ready," she told Claire who was on the other side of the glass wall. "Hang in there, Williams. I'll be right there; if you need anything, feel something unusual, just say, we can hear you."

"Okie dokie."

London left Danny alone and walked to where Claire was sitting behind the multiple screens that would show the 3-D images of Danny's abdomen. The open smile on Claire's face was visible from three miles away.

"Okay," London said when she occupied the chair beside Claire. "What is it? What are you smiling about?"

"Nothing," she said defensively, but the smile never faded from her face. "Why does it have to be something? I can't smile anymore?"

"Yes, you can smile, but I know you, and I know _this_ smile, so, go ahead. Start talking."

"Wow, the Army did get into you, huh?" At the mention of the Army, London glared at Claire. "Alright... I was just curious, how's everything between you and the Commander?"

"Who?" London said absent mindedly; she was paying extra attention to the monitors in front of her.

"What are you, an owl? I mean you and McGarrett!"

"Oh, okay... We're alright," she said still paying little attention to Claire. She couldn't get Steve's words out of her head. Danny had a nine year old daughter; she couldn't even consider the possibility of any failures.

Even though she was all chatty, Claire was also paying attention to the monitors and she saw the same thing that made London shift on her chair.

"I cannot believe it," London hissed through her teeth.

"What on Earth were they doing?" Claire said frowning at the image in front of her.

"I have no idea," London whispered before getting some stills of the scan and sending it to the printer. "But I'm taking him into an OR. Can you come with me?"

"OR? Sure..." Claire said as they rushed out of the room.

* * *

><p>Steve was at the waiting room for no longer than two minutes when Kono and Chin got there.<p>

"Hey, how's Danny?" Kono asked hurriedly.

"The doctor took him for a scan of his abdomen so they can see the extension of the damages," he answered automatically. He was worried because it was his partner who was in there, but he wasn't so tense because he knew London and he was sure she'd do her best.

"How long?" Chin asked cautiously; they were all nervous about it. Danny was shot with an assault rifle and, since he wasn't wearing a type III vest that can take that kind of impact, the bullet went through it.

"A couple of minutes ago, but he's conscious and talking," Steve reassured the cousins.

"Good," Kono whispered as she breathed out; she had been holding her breath ever since they found Steve pacing through the small room.

The three of them waited for another three minutes before the doors went open. They all turned to it to see an Asian doctor walking towards them; her steps weren't slow.

"How is he?" Steve didn't even think about introducing Chin and Kono, he just blurted the question.

"Surprisingly enough, he's fine. His vital signs are good, the bullet didn't hit any vital organs or veins." London made a small pause while the two men and the woman breathed almost normally.

"Is there a _but _to follow?" asked the Asian guy whom London had no idea who he was, but assumed he was part of Steve's team.

"Yes, there is," she admitted, making all eyes focus on her again. "Mr. Williams was shot with a large caliber projectile; big enough to cause him more than a little bit of damage on the inside. I'm taking him to an OR, but, before you all start to freak out, this is not life-threatening." London had to say that a bit louder because, at the mention of 'OR', everyone started to quietly panic. "Like I said, his vital signs are very strong and it didn't hit any organs or anything important. I just need to make some inner sutures and make sure it's all clean before I close. I'm doing this in an OR only because it's safer in terms of sterilization and, because I was told he has a daughter, I don't wanna take any chances."

The three people that were there for Danny exchanged a glance; obviously they were worried. London didn't have anything else to say at that moment. It was their friend who was heading to an OR and, even though it was a simple procedure, London knew how the word 'surgery' could be scary.

"Is there anything you want to know? Any questions?"

"How long will it take?" Kono asked; her voice lacked emotions.

"About thirty minutes, maybe less."

"When he'll be able to go home?" That was Steve.

"Well, I'd say today, but he'll have to rest." London made sure to be very clear about that. She knew Steve and she only prayed that Danny wasn't like him.

"Alright."

"Good, so, I have to go. I'll be back as soon as I finish."

As soon as London walked out of the doors, Kono and Chin let their bodies fall on the sofa. Steve didn't sit.

"I didn't even ask her name," Kono said as she threw her head back, leaning it against the wall. She was talking about the doctor who just came to tell them all that stuff about Danny.

"Her name is Doctor London Alexander," Steve replied mechanically as he paced through the room. "She's a surgeon."

Chin was tiredly analyzing the floor but he quickly shifted his eyes to Steve. "You sound like you know her."

"I do," he admitted stopping on his tracks facing the wall. Then he turned to look at the cousins; both were waiting for something better than his _'I do'_. "She saved my life."

Steve watched as Chin and Kono widened their eyes at that revelation; he had never told them he was pretty close to death. Thinking about that now, it felt wrong. They were his team but, more than that, they were part of his family, Ohana... And London was just as important. She saved his life in ways that went further than whatshe did in the Operating Room.

. . .


	21. Chapter 21

_Hey! It's still me _'BabyBoothy'_, only under a new _"alias" :D_ how do you like it?  
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_Mahalo to those who are reading this story and a very special thank you with a cherry on top to those few people who review it!_

_This chapter is longer than the others; I know I tend to prolong everything but that's how I write and I can't help it (if it bothers you, let me know). In any case, I hope you enjoy!  
><em>

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><p>"Wait a second... How come I never heard you were shot?" Chin asked after Steve finally told them about the one time Doctor Alexander saved his life; his tone was something between shocked and disappointed.<p>

"I stayed in Hawaii for a short period of time," Steve explained briefly. "After I returned from Iraq."

"Was it before or after your father's accident?"

Steve was already expecting that, after all, Chin met his father in the Academy so he probably heard about his accident over five years ago.

"Before. And, since you brought that up, she was one of the surgeons who did my father's surgery."

"When was that?" Kono asked curiously. Even though Chin knew a lot about Steve's father, she knew very little about John McGarrett.

"What, my father's surgery?" She nodded. "About five years ago."

"Five years? Wow... She looks so young."

"Yeah..."

Silence suddenly fell upon them and Steve found himself once again wondering about the Navy Lieutenant, Gregory Bennett, that London was talking to... What was it that they had to talk? And why she gave him her number? He was pretty certain that the piece of paper he gave him had her cell phone written on it.

* * *

><p>"Wait, wait! You won't like, sedate me?"<p>

Danny was on the OR table and perfectly aware of everything when London walked in, stood by his side, checked on his wound that was now open and simply asked took a syringe that was on a tray nearby.

"No, I won't," she said calmly, but that didn't comfort Danny one bit.

"Why not?" Danny's voice raised a note when he saw the needle getting closer to his body; she was serious.

"I won't do any cuts or anything like it," she explained putting the syringe aside for a while. "Even though this is an Operation Room, this is not a surgery." The tension that was shown in Danny's eyes eased a little but not completely. "Here's what I'll do," London said showing Danny his X-Rays. "This is the left side of your abdomen," she pointed to a picture that Danny could hardly understand. "And this is the right side, where you were shot at, and this is the bullet." When she pointed to the second X-Ray, he still didn't understand what was there but he could tell one thing — it was very different from the other one, and there was a projectile.

"So, what I'll do here is: I'll give you some local anesthetic so I can make some sutures to avoid internal bleeding since some small veins were compromised, I'll clean everything so we can discard infections and then I'll close. It's quite simple, I guarantee. You really have nothing to worry about."

"Okay. Please, don't take it personal. I'm sure you're an excellent doctor but... Why we're in an OR?"

Even though London was wearing a mask, Danny saw in her eyes that she was smiling. She didn't take it personal.

"I chose to do this here only because it's a sterile room," she explained calmly. It was part of her job to make sure the patients were aware of what she was about to do. "McGarrett told me you have a nine year old daughter so I'm more comfortable doing this here rather than somewhere else. She'll already see you all wrapped up like a Christmas gift, I don't want to see you back in the hospital any time soon."

Danny smiled. He had been shot once — sure it was nothing like this but still — he didn't think she needed to go through all that only to make some stitches and clean some wounds.

"Thank you," he said truthfully. He was touched by her care and attention.

"You're welcome," she said still smiling. "I'm gonna start now... Tell me if it hurts, okay?"

Danny nodded and London took the needle with the anesthetics again.

Her hands worked ever so carefully and Danny hardly felt anything, even at the beginning when the anesthetics weren't working properly.

"So, what were you guys working at?" London asked casually as she finished her first inspection on Danny's wound. She didn't take the bullet off yet; she was waiting a little longer, only to make sure the anesthetics numbed the whole area.

London had seen things like that in Iraq and, quite often, she had to do all this without any sedation — she had seen men bigger and tougher than Steve to yell at the top of their lungs as tears left a glowing track on their faces. She knew how painful that could be.

"Are you trying to make me think of something else?" Danny asked a little nervous.

"Something like that," London admitted. "So? Can you tell me or it's confidential?"

"No, it's not... We were after a man who escaped prison," Danny said and, as he was speaking, he could feel his nervousness was slightly fading. "We found him on the woods and, well, he shot me..."

"I can see that," London said simply as she checked the IV line and the blood bag. "Did you get the guy?"

"We did..."

"Really? Because, honestly, you don't sound too sure of it..."

"He stepped on a Claymore mine he had set and, well, we don't really know how he is right now, but yes, we get the guy."

London had gently poked the inside of Danny's wound, waiting for a flinch or something but it never happened. She could start working.

"Clamps," London asked Claire. She took the steel tool in her hands as the scrub nurse handed the suction. Taking only two seconds to inhale deeply, she prepared to pull the bullet out.

"Claymore mine. Wow... You're the lucky one then," London said when she successfully took the projectile out. There was a small bleeding, but nothing to worry about. What worried her was the caliber of the bullet she had just put on the tray - it was a 5.56mm. Danny was shot with an assault rifle but, apparently, someone upstairs liked him a lot; one inch to the side, it would either hit the kidney, one below, it would hit an artery and he would be dead before he could get to the hospital.

"Lucky? Sure... I'm lucky."

London glanced at Danny and, once again, he saw she was smiling. It made him smile too, she wouldn't be that happy if he was in bad shape, right?

"So, your turn... Tell me about you. You said you met Steve here. How so?"

"There was a shooting at the bank and Steve was there," London said simply. She had managed to stop the bleeding and was moving onto the stitching part. "He was shot, three times. Barely conscious when he got to the ER... Basically, that's how we met."

"Except for the 'bank' scenario, that sounds a lot like Steve."

"Yeah..." London whispered; she was fully concentrated on making tight stitches.

"Did I interrupt something? You know... my phone call this morning."

"No..."

"Okay, I'm a detective and I know when people are... not being completely honest." London glanced at Danny with the corner of her eye.

"Did you just call me a liar, Detective?" London arched an eyebrow, but Danny could tell she wasn't being serious. Her words were not cold or mean, they were more like, playful, easy.

"That was not what I said," Danny replied cheerfully. "It was just... Steve was being particularly hard to work with today."

London chuckled lightly. She had finished stitching and now she just needed to clean everything and close.

"Okay. Your timing was awful, but you shouldn't worry about that."

"Why not?"

"Because you won't do that again in the near future..."

"Really? And you know that because...?"

"Claire," London said calmly as she looked for the stitching kit she'd use to close Danny's abdomen. "As an official member of this hospital staff, can you answer Mr. Williams' question?"

Danny's eyes went from London to the nurse that was right in front of her, on his left.

"You shouldn't worry about that because won't work for the next... what, seven?"

"Ten."

"Ten?"

"Yep."

"Alright... No work for ten days, Mr. Williams." Danny's eyes widened and Claire couldn't not smile behind her mask as well.

"I'm sorry... _Ten days_?"

"Look at that. His hearing is perfect!" Claire joked as she and London exchanged an amused look. "But, honestly, you really are lucky. If she could, London would lock you in this hospital and would let you go only when it pleases her."

London glared at Claire but the latter didn't acknowledge that; Danny did though. "Really?"

Claire nodded. "The McGarrett's stayed in this hospital for quite a long time after she treated them."

Now, London felt Danny's eyes locked on her profile. "You're manipulating the facts! They had surgery, meaning they needed to be here. Detective Williams here is not going through such thing..."

"That's what she says," Claire whispered to Danny, making them both chuckle.

"Seriously, if I ever have to come to the hospital again, I want it to be here..."

"I'd like it better if we don't meet here, if you don't mind," London said when she finished closing the right side of Danny's abdomen.

"I don't agree with that," Claire said cheerfully. "It's always interesting when you and McGarrett are in this hospital together."

"I think Chief Pryce would disagree," London said and the two women laughed quietly.

"Will any of you tell me why that is or I'll have to use my interrogation skills?" Danny was more than a little curious when he heard Steve's surname.

"London here isn't very fond of rules. Never was. But, whenever one of the McGarrett's were in the hospital, her rebellious side kicked in, full mode." London rolled her eyes and shook her head in a negative sign, but Claire made a positive sign with her head. "Ask her about the surgery she did on Steve and you'll have a fairly good idea of what I'm talking about," she whispered to Danny.

"Nu-uh. Sorry to disappoint you, but not today," she said before he could ask anything. London had glanced at the clock and noticed it took her a little over thirty minutes to finish it, but she wouldn't have done it any other way. Once it had healed, Danny wouldn't have a scar to remind him of that day. "Can you sit for me, Mr. Williams?"

"Please," he said doing as she asked. There was this hint of hurt in his voice and London instinctively reached out to help him. "It's Danny. Just call me Danny."

She smiled inwardly when she realized it wasn't any physical pain that was bothering him.

"As you wish, Danny," London said while Claire went picking some packages. "I'll just put some clean bandages, then we'll get you a prescription for painkillers and you're good to go. Do you have someone to drive you home?"

"Sure," he said humorously while London wrapped his waist. "I always have someone to drive for me so that won't be a problem..."

"Good." London had finally finished, taken her gloves and mask off and was now smiling at him. "Now we should really get going... There were three very concerned people outside waiting for you, and I was supposed to get you out five minutes ago."

* * *

><p>Thirty five minutes passed since Doctor Alexander left the waiting area and the delay was starting to get on everyone's nerves.<p>

"Why is it taking so long?" Kono grunted as she paced through the room. "She said thirty minutes or **less**."

Not even the always so calm Chin Ho Kelly couldn't voice what he was thinking — _maybe something went wrong..._ — so, they remained quiet, hardly bearing the uncomfortable silence that filled the room. But, less than a minute later, they heard the distinct sound of Danny's laugh shortly before the door went open and they saw the blonde detective and the Asian doctor getting into the room.

"Oh hey guys!" Danny said, in everyone's opinion, oddly cheerful for someone who just had been shot.

"How are you feeling, Danny?" Chin asked slightly concerned.

"I'm good. Surprisingly enough, I'm fine," he said with a smile, making the three of them exchange a glance.

"You were right about the concern," he whispered at London, who did her best to suppress a smile.

"It took us a little longer than what I told you, and I apologize for making you wait here with no information."

"Something happened?" Steve asked with a not so subtle frown.

"No, nothing happened," she answered reassuringly. "It all went great, no complications. It just took us a little longer because I wanted it to be as perfect as I could do, so, once it's healed, there will be no visible scars." London offered Danny a smile watched his eyebrows arch in surprise and excitement.

"No scars? I like you. Please, tell me you'll stick around."

"For a while," London said weakly, but soon changed the subject when she noticed Danny and Steve exchanging a quick glance then fixed their eyes on her. "Here," she said quickly, handing Danny a transparent and not so small bottle that they usually used to collect biopsy samples that contained the bullet she removed from his side. "Have a souvenir, courtesy from your shooter."

Danny's eyes widened when he saw the bullet. He knew he'd been shot with an assault rifle but still, seeing the projectile with a little bit of his blood was slightly shocking. He could easily have been killed.

Steve could see Danny was absorbing the seriousness of what he had been through, so he grabbed the bottle and handed it to Chin; if Ed Howard survived, that was evidence.

"Uh- I'd... Am I discharged?"

Danny's voice wasn't exactly steady so London rushed to answer his question. "Sure. Just... Wait here, I'll get your medication and you're good to go."

She didn't wait for Danny's reply; as soon as she told him he'd be discharged, she flew out of the room, heading to the pharmacy. London only noticed Steve was following her when she waited for the guy who handed the medication looked for Williams' bottle.

"Steve, hi... I'm glad you're here. Look, about Williams, he can't drive right now and he really needs to rest. Ten days without heavy work."

Steve nodded throughout the whole time London was speaking, giving him instructions that he had already heard years back.

"Okay. No wheels and no work. Alright."

London copied Steve and nodded when he repeated her instructions — a very short version of it anyways. Just like Danny, when London saw the bullet on the scan, she freaked out inwardly. She always knew that Steve wasn't exactly the kind of guy who would lay low and do simple things. He was a SEAL, and, by definition, it means he did some crazy stuff. But, seeing him in that hospital again and with his partner with a 5.56mm caliber bullet in his abdomen, my God, she couldn't even bear thinking _what if it was Steve? What if I had to go through the same situation of when I met him?_ It was an overwhelming sensation. She wanted to say so many things to him but, at the same time, he brain couldn't come up with one sentence that would make sense, so she just looked at him. And Steve did the same. He kept his eyes fixed on the woman in front of him. He could see she was keeping some things on the inside and he wondered what would that be, and what she wasn't telling him.

"He'll be fine, right? I mean, you didn't just say that so we could, you know, breathe."

"I meant what I said. Like always." London felt like her words came out too icy so she took a deep breath. He'll be fine. You really don't have to worry..."

Steve was still holding the eye contact majestically and, to London, it was like he was staring into what felt like the depths of her soul. Just when Steve was to ask London about Greg, the guy returned with an orange bottle and a small tube.

"Patient Daniel Williams, is that correct?" he asked placing the medications on the counter.

"Yes," London said checking the tags.

"Would sign here, please?"

London did as the man said and she would wait for Steve's question but he didn't say anything. Muttering a "thank you" to the man, London pocketed the two things and she and Steve returned to the waiting area where everyone was waiting.

.

Danny was talking on the phone when they returned so Steve went talking to Chin and Kono while London waited patiently.

"Danny will be off for a few days," Steve told the cousins and they just nodded as if that was expected.

"How long?" Chin asked curiously.

"Ten days."

Chin and Kono once again just nodded.

"What about Howard?"

"I spoke with HPD," Kono said and, judging by the darkness of her tone, Steve knew what she had to say. "He didn't make it."

"Well, can't say I'm sad about it," Steve admitted while glancing at his partner. Only then he noticed Danny was no longer on the phone and was checking the orange bottle and the tube that London handed him.

"Painkillers for the pain and ointment to my wound, got it," Danny told London when Steve approached.

"And rest," she said forcefully. "You need to rest."

"Yes, doc."

London had acknowledged Steve's presence as soon as he stood by them but, when she turned to look at him, he was there, and the two people that she still didn't know by name were standing by his side.

"He can go," she told Steve, who was standing closer to her. "But, like I said, he can't drive."

"Yeah, I'll take him," Steve said with a nod and then added: "what about you, are you leaving?"

London felt her cheeks getting warm when the two figures that were by Steve's side exchanged a curious look and then locked their eyes on her.

"Yeah... I- uh... I don't— I don't really work here so, yes. I'll leave in a few."

"How long?"

London felt she was starting to blush when the two people arched their brows and kept looking at both, London and Steve curiously.

"Uh— I just need to... grab my stuff..."

"Okay. I'll wait," Steve said calmly. London was feeling very uncomfortable with the eyes on her so she just muttered an 'alright', turned on her heels and walked out of the room as fast as possible without running. That was on her top five of awkward moments...

.

"She doesn't work here?"

To say that Kono was puzzled was an understatement. The last five minutes or so were a roller coaster of emotions; they learned that Ed Howard died on an OR at the Queens, Danny joined them quite cheerful, Steve asking the doctor about her work time, but what she didn't really get was, how or why Doctor Alexander was taking care of Danny if she didn't work there.

"No... She works in North Carolina." Steve's answer didn't sound exactly sure, but then again, there were so many things in his head, so many questions that didn't have an answer- yet. He planned to get those soon.

"North Carolina? She's a little far from home," Chin said casually, covering the hints of curiosity in his observation.

"She did her residency here." Danny explained when it was more than clear that Steve wouldn't say anything about that; North Carolina was a delicate subject.

Chin arched an eyebrow. "Did you interrogate the doctor while you were there?" he asked a somewhat amused.

"Not quite," Danny said – his hands twitching. He glanced at Steve but he didn't show any reaction. "I uh- did some research."

"Research? How?"

"How do you do researches, Chin Ho Kelly?"

"Okay. Hold on," Kono said raising both hands in between Danny and Chin. She squinted, trying to make some sense out of that confused situation. "Why you did _research_ on her?"

"Because of me," Steve said finally, joining the small group that had gathered in the middle of the waiting room. "She's an old friend of mine..."

Steve had no idea why but once again, he referred to London as an old friend. It still bothered him but he was starting to wonder if they hadn't lost some of what they had with time...

Chin and Kono still had some doubts but they were discouraged to keep asking when they saw the stern look in Steve's face.

They had just exchanged a curious look when the doors went open again and Doctor Alexander returned.

"I- uh... I'm ready."

"Okay," Steve said with a short nod. "Let's go. Danny?" He had just turned back to Danny when Chin stood by his side.

"I got him."

Steve shook his head briefly and allowed Chin, Danny and Kono to walk in front of him. London would have followed Danny but she didn't; instead, she walked right be hind him, with an awful quiet Steve by her side.

.

"So," Kono said as soon as they walked out of the hospital. "What else?"

"What?" Danny asked curiously. He was walking with a limp but, thanks to Chin Ho's assistance, he could move better.

"Doctor Alexander... Why did you guys went through her life?" Kono asked casually, keeping her voice low. Steve was easily three steps behind and he obviously was keeping something to himself, but Kono couldn't let it go. If it was something that could affect the team somehow, she needed to know.

"Oh, that... It's nothing. Really." If Danny had hopes that Kono would buy that, he was a fool.

She stared at him, waiting for a better answer than that. Maybe it was the painkillers, maybe it was because he thought that they'd found out about it sooner or later, in any case, the next thing Kono heard was Danny saying that Steve and London were together. And when they stood by the Camaro, she glanced at the two oddly quiet figures that were walking behind them. They were walking side by side and pretty close.

"Huh... Imagine that," she whispered, trying to suppress a smile but failing when a grin appeared on her face.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes later, Steve parked the Camaro in front of Danny's place.<p>

"There you go," Steve said when he got out of the car so he could help his partner. "Home. Safe and sound."

Danny glared at Steve when he said those last words but didn't retort. London, who had just got out of the car, walked by Danny's side as he made his way to the door.

"Remember," London said when she stepped inside his apartment, following Steve and Danny. "Rest. For God's sake, do as I told you, will ya?"

"You're bossy," Danny said as he sat on his couch and London smirked at him.

"So I've been told," she replied placing Danny's medications on a small table next to the his Christmas tree. "But I'm serious."

"Yes, doc. Don't worry. I'll do it."

"Need some help there, Danno?" Steve offered, seeing that his partner had closed his eyes and sighed as his hands went to where the stitches were.

"No," Danny waved it off, just cracking an eye open. "No, I'm fine. You can go. Jesus Christ, _go_!"

Steve raised an eyebrow and the left corner of his lip. "He's good," he told London who was by his side. She wasn't worried but she knew how the stitches could be a bother.

"I'll check on you tomorrow," London told a barely awake Danny, then turned to Steve. "We should get going."

"Sure. See you, bro," he said before leaving but Danny didn't answer to him. He was already asleep.

* * *

><p>Steve took Danny's Camaro and drove back to his place instead of the hotel.<p>

"I need clean clothes," he said when his eyes met London's and she was slightly curious.

"Oh, of course."

.

London followed Steve inside. It was the first time she saw that house again after half a decade and it still looked just the same.

"I'll be right back," Steve told her after closing the door and walking to the stairs. "Make yourself at home."

London walked very slowly through the living room; it was a strange feeling to be back to that place. She thought she'd never visit there again.

Her feet led her to his lanai and down to the shore. It was late, London couldn't conceive how late but she didn't care. When her feet touched the sand, with the dark sky above, she remembered walking on the beach. With Steve.

"Hey."

London was so caught up with her thoughts and memories that she didn't see hear when Steve walked out of his house and stood right behind her.

"Hi," she whispered more than just a little surprised. London had turned to look at Steve and saw traces of something that she couldn't name but it seemed to be bothering him a lot. "What's wrong?"

Steve took a step forward, getting closer to London. He disliked any amount of distance between them, and he didn't know if he was prepared to ask her what he needed to know.

"Steve?" London asked softly, tilting her head to her right and he noticed she was kind of hugging herself, both arms wrapped across her chest.

Steve decided that, whether he liked the answer or not, he needed to know.

"I saw you talking to a guy at the hospital..." London didn't say anything; she just bit her lower lip. "How do you know Greg?"

London knew that Steve was talking about Gregory Bennett. "He's a patient," she said as casually as she could. "I was part of a group of surgeons who were held responsible for him a while ago."

"I saw you giving him your number..."

"Yeah. I didn't get to check how his recovery time was so I'd like to see how he healed."

Steve felt relieve. It wasn't like him to be jealous or anything but, when he saw London and Greg talking and smiling and even laughing together, that made him feel something weird inside, but it was gone now. The weird feeling, not the questions. There was one more thing that he'd been thinking about for more than just a while.

"I thought you said you were working in North Carolina," Steve said after a few seconds and, even though he didn't say that in an accusing tone, he saw London getting tense.

"I am," she replied quickly, but she looked at her feet, avoiding Steve's eyes. He frowned.

"London?"

He knew she wasn't telling him everything and, again, he felt like he was getting into a very unknown territory. And he didn't like the feeling.

London raised her head and Steve saw the turmoil in her eyes, and when she spoke, he went speechless for longer than a second.

"We need to talk..."

. . .

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** _Hi people! Once again, thank you to those who are reading this. I'd like to let you all know that it might take a while for me to update this story but I am not giving up on it. I'll never do it. I promise I'll try my best to update my stories as soon as I can but I can't promise anything because I'm going on vacation..._


	22. Chapter 22

_I'm back! Sorry it took me this long to get back here. I take full responsibility for the lack of updates. My sincere apologies to all of you._

_Like always, mahalo to those who are reading this story and a very special thank you with a cherry on top to those few people who review it!_

_New chapter and I hope you like it. Let me know what you think of it in a review!_

* * *

><p><em>"We need to talk."<em>

London's words echoed in his brain and ears. The way she said those words, it felt ominous.

The past hour, Steve felt like he'd been sailing through troubled waters; now, he felt like it was just the calm before the storm — and if the calm was like that, he could only imagine what the storm would be like.

He often heard that those were the worst four words someone would like to hear if in a relationship — now, he knew, first hand, how crappy that was.

"I'm listening."

It was a cool night in Oahu but the shiver that London felt going down her spine was not because of the weather. It was most definitely thanks to the coldness of Steve's words.

"Let's go back inside," she said weakly, only postponing the inevitable.

* * *

><p>A lot of different scenarios crossed Steve's mind while he walked back inside with an awful quiet London by his side, but nothing like what she had to tell him. Steve felt like he was facing a storm at sea inside an inflatable boat.<p>

"I'm sorry," he said more than just a little shocked. "I think I got it wrong... I thought I heard you saying that you're in the Army and that you've been to Iraq..."

London, who had been sitting on his couch, sank further into the furniture. "I did," she whispered to his despair.

"What? You're serious? You cannot be serious. This has to be a joke, and a very stupid one, London..."

Steve shouted while pacing back and forth in his living room after he heard that dreadful news. He knew she wasn't joking — she wouldn't joke about something like that —, but he expected that he was just having one hell of a nightmare and he would wake up any time soon and it would be nothing but an awful memory. _Oh God, my head is about to explode._

Shutting his eyes closed and rubbing his temple, Steve wished for all that to stop. Just stop. But it never happened. Steve didn't wake up his nightmare. If anything, it only became worse when she handed him that goddamned letter.

Steve's eyes ran through its lines and, by the time he finished it, he felt like there was a hand inside his chest that was squeezing his heart and trying to rip it off his chest.

"I'm sorry," she whispered trying to hold the tears and the sobs that were starting to build inside.

She had told him her decision to join the Army after she received the letter that told her that Nathan had died. Killed In Action. Of course that Steve didn't take that easily. She even showed him the letter that Hunter gave her when he had come to Hawaii that she carried everywhere as a reminder of why she was doing that but still, Steve seemed to be pretty upset to say the very least...

He had been waiting London to say that she was in South Carolina and he misunderstood it, or that she didn't tell him the truth because she met someone else after he left but it didn't mean anything, or that she was now part of the Doctors Without Borders or whatever and she didn't tell him because of some reason that wouldn't make much sense to him but nothing, not even for a second he considered the Army.

"Why would you do that? You said you and the Army were like different substances. Why? I don't get it."

The bitterness in his voice was so much she could barely handle it. London almost let a sob out, but she managed to hold it all inside.

"Things changed, Steven," she said very unsteady. "After you left, things changed. I didn't plan it, it just happened."

"THINGS LIKE THAT DON'T _"JUST HAPPEN"_, LONDON!"

"YES, THEY DO, STEVEN!"

Great. Now they were yelling at each other. Fantastic. London stood up quickly and turned her back to Steve as she took a few steps towards the window. She needed to calm down because she knew something like this could happen. She hoped it didn't, but she knew it was a possibility.

"Look," she said after almost a minute in silence. London had turned to face Steve and he wasn't the least bit happy. "I don't expect you to understand it. Not even my father accepted it very nicely when he learned it but... Nate died. My brother died and I couldn't do a single thing about it—"

"You can't save everyone," Steve said coldly. Deep down, he knew he was being too harsh on her, but he was still overwhelmed by that whole thing. When she said what she'd done, it hit him like a tidal wave and he was still struggling to get to the surface and breathe.

London stared at Steve blankly. She heard what he said perfectly, but she refused to process it. That was bullshit.

"You're right," she said simply. London was so incredibly calm that she didn't recognize herself in her words. "I can't save everyone. But just because I can't, doesn't mean I can't try."

Steve raised his head to face London and, much like her words, her expression was completely void of emotions.

"When my mother died, I was too young. I couldn't do anything for her. Now, I have knowledge to help people and I couldn't help my brother," she continued as cold and flat as it was possible. "But I can do something and I choose to use my ability to make the difference out there. I've been to Iraq and I've seen people die, more than I dare to count, but I saved many lives as well. As you said, I might not save everyone, but I couldn't accept it without trying. I couldn't just sit and wait until I get another letter saying my other brother died, or even you." London walked with steady steps to the front door. "It's late. Goodnight, Steve."

That was the last thing she said before walking out of his room and closing the door behind her.

Steve stood exactly where he was, in the middle of the room. He was still processing the fact London was now in the Army and had been to Iraq. This was definitely not what he had in mind when this day first started. Not at all.

He walked slowly to his kitchen where he got himself a glass of water but he didn't drink it — even though there was this bitter taste in his mouth, he didn't think he'd be able to swallow anything.

Putting the glass in the sink, Steve walked back to his living room and let his body fall on the sofa. When he did it, he heard a very soft tingling inside his pocket and his heart suddenly became a ton heavier — London's necklace.

He felt his fingers closing around the diamond ring; it wasn't just a ring and its value wasn't because of the hard, colorless stone, it was valuable because it represented a promise. But, right now, it felt just as cold as the winter he had spent in Berlin a couple of years back.

Thinking about the memories that that simple necklace and ring brought him, Steve jumped out of the sofa and went to the door but, by the time he opened it, there was no one else outside or anywhere near his place. London was gone.

* * *

><p>London closed the front door of Steve's house behind her and, for a moment, she couldn't move.<p>

She leaned against the door and stood there for a few seconds; a single tear fell from her left eye, leaving a glowing track all the way down her cheek until it died in her shirt but that was it. She forbid herself from crying any tear further — not because she wasn't sad but because she was too proud to do so. Maybe Claire was right... Maybe the Army did get into her.

Taking a deep breath, London finally took a step forward. Her body threatened to buckle but she was stronger than that and the next step was firmer and by the time she was five yards away, she was almost marching.

London looked back when she reached the street and regretted it the very same minute — darkness greeted her eyes. She felt like the tears were starting to make her eyes wet so she sped up the pace as a song she heard that very same morning started playing in her head and she couldn't not admit that it was how she felt right now...

_'between the lines of fear and blame_

_you begin to wonder why you came..._

_Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend_

_somewhere along in the bitterness and I_

_would have stayed up with you all night_

_had I known how to save a life?'_

Was that it? They had endured five long years to end now? Like this? No. It couldn't be.

With that thought in mind, London practically ran through the streets of Oahu. It was really late but she didn't mind. She needed to find some refuge; she would turn around and go back to the one place that felt like her fortress, but she couldn't go back to Steve's house. Instead, she ended up on the fancy neighborhood that she didn't recall the name but had been there countless times before.

Instead of ringing the doorbell, London reached for her phone and dialed a cell phone number. It was almost one in the morning and she didn't want to wake the entire house. She had an answer after the third ring. There were only two people London could think of when she left Steve; Claire was on call at the Hawaii Medical Center, the other...

_"Doctor Larsson."_

The husky voice of Nicholas told London that he had been sleeping — and she spoiled it.

"Nick. It's me..."

_"London?"_ Judging by the change in his tone, he was more than just a little surprised with that call._ "What's wrong? Are you okay?"_

"Can you open the door... Please?"

_"You're here?"_ It sounded like a question but he didn't let London answer it. _"Hold on..."_

Less than a minute later, the gates opened and London crossed the front yard with heavy and small steps. She would like it better if she was somewhere else...

She saw the front door of the house opening and a hurried figure walked through it, towards her.

"Hey... What happened?"

Nick said, half curious, half worried, when he saw London standing at his doorstep, looking in distress. Not that she was showing it to the whole wide world, but he knew her just enough to know when she's trying to hide something.

"I- I've had an argument with Steve," she admitted weakly.

She didn't have to say anything else, Nick knew what was it about and he felt anger starting to grow inside him. It was irrational but he wanted to kick the crap out of the Navy SEAL. They should have argued about her decision to join the service and, even though he didn't get very happy when she told him what she'd do, it was her decision to make. And he was in the Navy, for Christ sake! That was crazy...

Nick thought that, given his background and history on the military life, maybe Steve would understand her. Clearly, he thought wrong.

"Wanna talk?" he offered. Nick was being just polite; he knew what London's answer would be.

"Not really..."

"Alright. As you wish... C'mon then," he said putting his arm around her shoulder and ushering London inside.

* * *

><p>Steve ran back inside, took the keys to his Chevy Silverado and pulled the truck out of the driveway, cursing himself for letting her go.<p>

He got to the Kahala Hotel less than ten minutes later but London wasn't there.

Steve considered going after London but he didn't see her on his way to the hotel and there were a couple more routes that she could have taken so, not particularly excited about it, Steve decided to wait for her there. He paced across the room for a few minutes before sitting on an armchair, in front of the door. He didn't know when it happened but, at some point, he fell asleep.

The door never opened.

. . .


	23. Chapter 23

_Firstly, sorry it took me forever to update this story. I was finishing "Aloha!' and I didn't have much time to work on this baby. But it's back now_ :)

* * *

><p>It was 6:07am when Steve's phone rang. He woke up startled, his neck was slightly sore from the night spent on the armchair.<p>

The first thing that he did was look around for any evidence of London's presence. Useless — she wasn't there.

His thoughts started working on where she might have been when the insistent phone rang again.

"McGarrett." Even to his ears, his voice sounded a little cold, but he didn't care about it.

Apparently, neither the person on the other end of the phone call. It was Duke, from the HPD. It was time to put that thought on hold; the Five-0s had a case.

* * *

><p>London hardly slept that night. If she had an hour of sleep, that was a lot. She spend most of her night rolling on bed and torturing herself with the last conversation she had with Steve. She didn't like remembering it but, for some unknown reason, her brain couldn't shut it down.<p>

Deep down she knew it would be hard to tell Steve about her decision. But she never imagined it would end up like that. True that she was the main responsible for how things ended, after all, London was the one to leave Steve's place, but still...

_"You are stupid. You are such an idiot, London. How could you..."_ The little voice inside her brain didn't let her forget the monumental stupidity she had done.

When it was around seven, she heard movements outside the room she was staying and, since she wasn't having any sleep, she decided to get out of bed and face whatever that day was holding for her.

.

"Morning," she said when she walked into the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee was all over the place.

Nick was doing some French toasts and heard the tired voice coming from behind him. Looking over his shoulder, he saw London coming towards him.

"Morning," he replied rather cheerfully. "Did you sleep well?"

"Brilliant, thank you."

Nick knew London was lying only to make him feel a bit better and London knew she wasn't fooling Nick but still, they choose to ignore everything and keep going.

"What will you do today?" he asked casually as he put the toasts on a plate.

"Not sure yet," she replied while looking for some mugs in one of his cabinets. "How about you?"

"Day off," he said before biting on a toast.

"Sweet."

Nick couldn't not notice her voice was void of cheerfulness.

London handed him a mug with the fresh coffee he had made and took one of his French toasts out of pure politeness. She wasn't hungry.

"I have an idea," Nick said after a few seconds while they just chewed and sipped. "Why don't you come with me to the Waimea Valley?"

London seemed to think about that for a while. It's been ages since the last time she went to Waimea (or any other places like that in Hawaii, for that matter) and it would be a good distraction... She was just about to tell him that when her phone rang. London reached for it immediately and answered it.

"Hello?"

_"Doctor Alexander, hi."_

The sparkle of hope that had lit up in her chest faded instantly. London hoped to hear Steve's voice. Instead, she heard Gregory's. The Navy Lieutenant she saw on the hospital.

"Hi there," she said, faking a smile that he wasn't seeing, but she hoped it was showing on her voice. "How are you doing?"

_"Great, thanks for asking. How about you?"_

"Brilliant." Still a lie.

_"Awesome."_ If Greg knew she wasn't being complete honest, he didn't show. She appreciated that greatly. _"Look. I'm gonna be available this afternoon so, why don't you meet me at the Base, Medical Unit?"_

London thought about that for just a second. She had Nick's offer of a day in the sun, and Gregory Bennett was offering London a day working. It was an obvious decision.

"What time?"

_"I'm off after noon... Fourteen hundred is good for you?"_

2 PM. She had nothing scheduled to any time. That day or any other day for that matter. By now, London doubted she'd stay in Hawaii longer than the week she had planned. "Perfect. See you later."

_"See you."_

That was it. She would spend her day working.

"I guess we won't be going to Waimea," Nick said calmly from behind his mug. London was still staring at her phone, but she put it back in her pocket and sat on his sink.

"Gotta check on a patient," she apologetically while getting more coffee. She'd need it.

"Don't get me wrong," Nick began as he put his mug down. "But you don't even work here! How on Earth you have patients to check on?"

"It's an old patient," she said simply. "Iraq."

Nick nodded. He heard little about her work in Iraq but he knew a lot about how London was, and this was just like her. She was devoted to her patients when she was in Hawaii, but when she joined the Army, this devotion grew a lot bigger. Probably because of her unique knowledge of the military world, definitely because of her losses.

"Oh. And I have a new patient," she added shortly.

"Who's that?"

"Detective Williams."

Danny.

Nick was a little surprised when he heard the name. He knew him. He had stitched the blonde guy a couple of times back then. "Five-0?"

"Yep."

London promised she'd check how he was doing today and she didn't consider not doing so. He was Steve's partner, but she was a professional. She'd keep her word.

"Huh..."

London cocked an eyebrow at Nick. "Huh, what?"

Nick just shook his head while he busied himself with a French toast and coffee.

"I was going to invite you to have dinner with us," he said after a long time chewing and sipping. "But I think you'll have other plans."

"Nah," London said poorly, leaning back, her back resting against the cool wall. "I doubt I'll have any plans... Today or any other day to be honest."

"Talk to him," Nick said matter-of-factly.

"I tried. Yesterday. Didn't work."

"Yesterday is gone."

"I know... I don't know if I can go through that again..."

It was weird for Nick to see London like that. It was so out of character. She never allowed things to affect her that much... But then again, he never saw someone causing such great effect on London like Steve. Not even himself.

Nick didn't say anything. He just sat next to her on the marble of his sink and they finished their breakfast together, quietly.

"I gotta go," London said after almost five minutes. "I need to see Detective Williams."

"I'll give you a ride," Nick offered when he remembered London last night. She had walked — ran — all the way to his place.

She accepted it with a smile and, three minutes later, she was sitting on the passenger seat of a black Ferrari, going through the streets of Oahu. Suddenly, the Island looked nothing like home.

It was selfish but, for a second, London wished Steve was just as miserable as she was.

* * *

><p>The case the Five-0s were assigned was extraordinaire. It involved the Navy. A SEAL that was on leave was found dead in his home. According to the ME, it was murder.<p>

Steve questioned why the Five-0s were handling this and not NCIS or someone else. He got his response rather quickly.

"He was a close friend of mine," Governor Jameson spoke from somewhere behind Steve and his team, minus Danny.

The woman was wearing big sunglasses even though it was a cloudy day. Steve addressed her a questioning look. Some could take it as defiantly, but he was just thinking about what he could do that the NCIS couldn't. Pat Jameson could be the Governor of Hawaii, but he didn't fear her. Respected, obviously, but fear was out of the menu.

"His father and I were great friends. He's almost like family."

That was enough to Steve. Whether she was lying or not, telling him half truths or not, he could work with that. He answered only to the Governor and, even though she didn't need to explain herself to him, he wanted to know what he was dealing with.

"Alright," Steve agreed. "Chin, Kono, you can take the crime scene. I'll go to Pearl."

.

With Danny being out of field for ten days, Steve went to Pearl alone. That probably was for the best because the Five-0 leader wasn't exactly cheerful that morning.

Steve parked his Chevy Silverado at the Naval Base at 7:28 am.

He was waiting to speak with Captain Brenner, the victim's Commanding Officer, when his phone rang. It wasn't who he was expecting.

"Cage, what's up?"

_"Steve. I'm sorry it took me forever but I had some, let's say, obstacles... to find your friend. You never told me she was in the Army."_

"That's because I didn't know it until yesterday."

Yesterday. He couldn't stop thinking about the disastrous talk they had last night...

_"Well, I guess it makes sense... Anyways, she's Army and Airborne, so it took me a little while to get your answer..."_

After hearing the word Airborne, Steve went temporarily deaf. He didn't know what he was expecting or if he was expecting something but that piece of information that London never told him was now echoing in his brain.

"Sorry, did you say Airborne?"

When she told him she was in the Army and went to Iraq, for some unknown reason Steve assumed she was part of a Medical Unit and that she worked at some sort of Support Hospital in Iraq. He never considered the idea of London parachuting in the middle of God knows where...

_"I'm guessing you didn't know that..."_

"No. I didn't."

_"Okay... Here's what I found out, your Army Captain friend is member of the 541st Medical Detachment, which is a forward surgical team of the United States Army and one of four airborne teams assigned to the 44th Medical Brigade, in Fort Bragg, North Carolina..."_

Steve ran his fingers through his hair. _Is it ever gonna get any better? _His silent question was never uttered.

_"And,"_ Shane continued. _"The reason why it took me longer than the usual was because, first, she's an Army Captain, second, she was deployed."_

"Iraq."

_"Precisely."_

Steve took a deep breath. He looked around and at that very moment, he saw Captain Brenner. "Thanks Cage. I gotta go now but thanks a lot."

_"No problem,"_ Shane said but Steve didn't add anything; instead, he ended the phone call and walked to meet with Andrew Brenner, Navy Captain.

Captain. Even though there were huge differences between the Navy Captain and the Army Captain*, the similar nomenclature for the rank and the talk with Cage were still haunting Steve when he walked to meet with the Navy Officer.

Steve was ready to spend a very long time at the Naval Base; but he wasn't exactly prepared to something that happened in the mean time...

. . .

* * *

><p><strong>*<strong>_According to the NATO, an Army Captain is equivalent to a Navy Lieutenant, while a Navy Captain is equivalent to an Army Colonel._


	24. Chapter 24

_Thank you so very much to those who are reading this story. I got over 1k hits last chapter and this makes me super duper happy! But, honestly, I'd like to know what you guys think of it though. It would make me even happier and it helps me a lot, really. Speaking of which, sorry it took me this long to update but I had a bit of a hard time with what could have been a writer's block... But, after a long while, I got this chapter done and I__ sure hope you guys enjoy! And review :D_

* * *

><p>London and Nick had to drive around for a while because she didn't recall exactly where Steve's partner lived. After about thirty minutes, she finally found his apartment. London thanked Nick for the ride, his time and patience before knocking on Danny's door.<p>

When she lowered her hand, London realized she was still wearing the same clothes from last night. It could be awkward... but she didn't have much time to think about it because after a few seconds, she heard footsteps on the inside.

"Doctor," Danny said with what London understood as genuine surprise. "What a surprise."

"I said I'd check on you today, didn't I?" London replied with a small smile. She tried hard but couldn't smile any bigger. And when she heard more footsteps on the inside, she frowned inwardly. She should have called...

London was just about to apologize for the unexpected visit when a little girl appeared by Danny's side and wrapped her arms around his waist. She should be his daughter.

She had shy eyes and seemed to be as surprised as London was.

"Hey, Monkey... Say hello to our visitor. She's the cool doctor I told you earlier."

"Did you fix Danno?"

"If I _fixed_ Danno?" London kneeled to talk to the girl. "I guess we can say that... Yes, I did."

"And he's gonna be okay, right?"

The worry in her tone couldn't be more evident. "Right. He's gonna be more than okay. He's gonna be great."

"Promise?"

"Pinky promise," London said and held a hand with only the pinky finger up. The little girl looked at it.

"Pinky promises are very serious."

"I know that."

London held her hand and, after only a few seconds, the kid's pinky finger wrapped around hers. The girl had a smile on her face.

"Thank you."

"You're more than welcome," London said with a genuine and wide open smile on her face. She felt like she didn't smile like that in ages.

"My name is Grace. Grace Williams," she added proudly, making London smile grow bigger.

"Grace is a very lovely name," she said softly. "My name is London Alexander."

"London? Like the English city?"

The woman chuckled. "Yeah. Like the English city..."

"It's pretty! Mommy lived in London... Have you ever been there?"

"No, I haven't..."

"I did. With Mommy and Danno."

London, who was still on her knees, looked up and found Danny's eyes. He was quietly watching that fun interaction between the two girls with a smile on his face.

"Well then, maybe one day you can tell me all about the city of London."

"I can do it now," Gracie said cheerfully. The initial shyness was long gone.

London stood up and she would really turn that offer down but Danny invited her in; since she was there to check on him, she could stay a little longer if she wanted to.

"I'd love to," she said while walking into Danny's apartment.

London's terrible day had just turned way better, thanks to this little girl named Grace.

* * *

><p>As it was expected, Steve found some resistance while trying to gather some information at Pearl. He managed to speak with Captain Brenner about Lieutenant Hilbert, his subordinate but, when he asked for further information, such as his last assignment, he found himself facing some obstacles and barriers that he knew all too well.<p>

Steve imagined they'd have more chances with his place but still, he waited when a Commander showed up, requiring his attention on something that he described as highly important.

Maybe it was because of Lieutenant Paul Hilbert's death or New Year was getting closer and closer, the thing was: the Naval Base was a bit busier than Steve remembered.

"Commander McGarrett?"

Steve was patiently waiting for Brenner to return, walking around, when he heard someone calling for him. He knew who it was.

"Lieutenant Bennett."

Gregory gave him the standard hand salute as the military code demands but with a little smile on his face, which soon faded when he spoke his next sentence.

"I assume you're here because of what happened to Paul."

Steve shook his head, confirming Greg's assumption. "Work visit..."

"Right..."

A few seconds went by and neither man said a word. Steve seemed to be quite uncomfortable; he shifted his weight a couple of times.

"So... I didn't know you knew Doctor Alexander," Steve said casually as he checked his watch and looked around, searching for Brenner. He was still nowhere to be seen.

"I didn't know you knew her either," Gregory said casually but instantly remembering London's words about the Five-0 leader – that her relationship with Steven was complicated; he could see right there that she wasn't lying. "She saved my life," he explained when Steve stood there, watching him with cold and defiantly eyes.

Steve thought to himself how many lives London saved... He was still a but dumbstruck with the whole Army and Captain and Airborne thing but the feeling of pride was growing inside him, along with the guilty for the way he talked to her last night.

"That's London," he said, almost a murmur. "She helps people..."

Gregory noticed the subtle hints of pain hidden in Steve's words. He didn't know McGarrett that well but he knew that things were a bit weird. He was good at reading people and London's behavior yesterday plus Steve's were more than enough for him to know.

The Lieutenant was about to say something when someone called for McGarrett. Both men looked to where the voice had come and they saw Captain Brenner.

"See you around, Bennett."

Steve had turned his back to Gregory and was to walk away when the latter told him to wait. Steve stopped.

"Be here around 2pm. I might be able to help you."

Steve didn't have time to ask how Gregory could possibly help him; the Lieutenant was walking with long steps away from him. He figured he was talking about the case he was investigating so he made a mental note while resuming his walk.

* * *

><p>London lost track of time while she sat there, on Danny's rug and had a quite interesting chat with Grace Williams. The girl was the cutest thing ever.<p>

"We rode on the biggest Ferris wheel ever!" she said enthusiastically while describing her experience with the big eye.

The woman with Japanese features heard it all with great attention, questioning about almost everything and she always smiled when Gracie answered. She had an answer for everything.

"So, I'm guessing you enjoyed the English city quite a lot," London said happily.

"I did! And so did dad, right Danno?"

Both of them looked at the blonde detective, who had been sitting on his sofa-bed for the past thirty minutes, listening to his child tell the story of their trip to London, when Grace was just six years old. He had no idea how she remembered that with so much details.

"Sure thing, Monkey," Danny said with a smile and London felt a bit jealous of what she was seeing. The love and affection between Danny and his daughter. It reminded her of how sad and lonely she really was...

"How about you?" Grace quickly turned to London. "Have you ever been out of the country?"

"Yes, I did," London answered with a short nod.

"Where?"

"Let's see... I've been to Japan a couple of times, to Sweden once, and to Iraq."

London noticed that, at the mention of the last place, Grace and Danny frowned a little bit.

"Why did you go to Iraq?" Grace asked the same question that Danny had in mind.

"To help people," she answered truthfully. "I was working."

"Uncle Steve went to Iraq once," Grace said thoughtfully. "I think... I think he was working too..."

Hearing Steve's name made London feel a sharp pain in her chest.

"Hey, Monkey... why don't you go get the number of that pizza place you like, huh?" Danny jumped in and London thought she knew why he was doing this. He had seen her hold her breath when Grace mentioned Steve's name.

"Why?" Grace asked curiously.

"Well, it's almost lunch time and I thought we could have some pizza! What do you think?"

"You just got out of the hospital... Can you have pizza?"

Grace's questioning eyes shifted quickly to London – she had covered her pain with a mask.

"One slice. No pepperoni."

Grace smiled at both of them and she hopped all the way into Danny's kitchen. Following the girl's lead, London stood up.

"Iraq?"

Danny's one word question was something that London was already waiting for.

"Iraq. I just got back," London answered simply as she sat beside him. "I was deployed."

Danny's eyes widened and he turned to look at the woman by his side. She seemed different than the confident doctor he'd seen yesterday. Now, London seemed worn out.

"I thought you were a doctor. Working in North Carolina."

"I am. I'm a doctor, from the United States Army. Stationed at Fort Bragg and member of a surgical team."

Because she'd said those words before, now they slipped out of her mouth with little complications. London closed her eyes as she played again the memories of last night.

Unlike the first time she said it out loud, London didn't hear any exasperated words or anything. Everything was silence. Pure and plain silence as Danny just stood there, looking at the young woman.

"How did he took it?" he asked after a handful of minutes; Grace had already returned and they'd ordered mozz pizza.

"Pretty bad," London answered, helping Grace to set the table for the three of them. At some point, London was convinced to stay and have lunch with them. "Actually, _pretty bad_ is an understatement... We had quite an argument last night."

London had no idea how it happened but there she was, talking about her life with someone who was a complete stranger less than twenty four hours ago. But there was something about Danny; probably because he was Steve's partner and they seem to get along pretty well...

She watched as Danny short nodded. The detective from Jersey knew exactly what she was talking about.

Then, Grace's soft voice brought her out of her thoughts and wanders. "Is that why you look sad now?"

London couldn't help but look at the little girl, holding some forks in her hand while watching her every movement. That girl was incredibly bright for her age – but then again, her father was a detective, it was only natural...

"A little bit," London admitted.

"Did you argue with your boyfriend?"

London chuckled softly. It should be a Williams thing... She thought to herself that, when she went back to Fort Bragg, she wouldn't miss just Steve.

"Yeah," she told Grace; a ghost of a smile played with her lips for a brief second when she didn't use the word friend. _If only this could last..._

"Why?" Grace asked curiously.

Danny looked at London - apologies written in his eyes - but she waved it off. It was okay.

"Well, I made a choice and he didn't like it..."

"Iraq?"

London chuckled. "That too."

"I learned about it at school and I've seen some things on the TV. Iraq is a dangerous place... Maybe he was just worried about you?" she suggested carefully, as if she knew it was a delicate subject to London.

"Maybe..."

"Do you think he's your Prince Charming?"

London smiled at that question, especially when it was asked with so much seriousness.

"I think it's possible," she answered honestly.

"Then it'll be okay."

London found herself holding onto the words of a nine year old girl. She wanted desperately for Grace to be right...

.

It was close to 1pm when London left Danny's place.

"Thank you for everything," she told the blonde detective when she stepped outside his house. "And I'm so sorry for the trouble." She had spent easily four hours with the Williams'.

"It was no trouble, right Monkey?"

"Sure!"

London smiled at the little girl. The time she spend with Grace was more than welcomed. For those hours, she was sort of able to forget about practically everything and, even when she found herself talking to Danny about the Army and the argument she had with Steve, it all seemed too easy, so much simpler... A little smile appeared on her lips.

London caressed the top of Grace's head. That kid brought so much hope to her, even though she was sure it would fade as soon as she turned her back place. Children are so pure and so full of hopes and dreams and London found herself loving the softness of that moment. It was nice for a change.

"When you go back to the hospital, in about a week, look for Head Nurse Claire Jennings or Dr. Nicholas Larsson," London told Danny when the cab she had called honked. "They are great people and I'll make sure they get to see how you're doing."

"Won't you be there?"

"I don't think so..."

Danny noticed that she wasn't saying everything. Then, the way she kneeled in front of Gracie and hugged her, he knew what she was keeping for herself.

"Bye, Gracie," London said when she let go of the little girl. "It was a pleasure meeting you."

"It was a pleasure meeting you too."

"Now it's up to you, Miss Williams. Take care of Danno, okay?"

"Will do."

"Promise?"

"Pinky promise," Grace said and held a hand with only the pinky finger up. London smiled at her and wrapped it with her pinky finger. Then, she stood up once again and looked at Danny.

"You have a lovely daughter," she said with a smile. "And it was a huge pleasure meeting you too, Danny."

The Five-0 detective hugged London shortly before she turn her back and walk towards the cab that had honked for the second time.

When she jumped on the back seat. Danny touched Grace's shoulder and they were back inside.

"Monkey, how do you feel about visiting dad's work place?"

"London said you can't work, dad."

"Dad won't work," he told her while grabbing the phone and pressing re-dial. "It's just a visit. Dad just needs to talk to Uncle Steve..."

Gracie smiled as Danny gave his address again to the person on the other end. Maybe it was none of his business, but he wanted to know what happened so that London was saying her goodbyes like she was leaving...

* * *

><p>Steve was back to the Five-0 headquarters and going through the information he got from Pearl. It wasn't much but, according to what Chin and Kono had found at Lieutenant Hilbert's place, it didn't seem like a cleaner's work or anything related to his background as a SEAL or any of his missions. If Steve believed in such thing, he'd say that they guy was just very unlucky.<p>

Kono had just showed her boss the results that came from the fingerprint that Chin collected from the crime scene when the glass doors went open and they saw their colleague walking through it. With someone holding onto his hand.

"Hey... I thought the doctor told you to stay out of work," Chin commented when Danny approached them.

"I was in the neighborhood and I decided to say hi," Danny replied as relaxed as he could get.

"Hey Gracie!" Kono smiled at the little girl that was accompanying the blonde detective.

"Auntie Kono!"

Grace Williams let go of Danny's hand and walked towards her auntie and hugged her.

"Will you watch her for just a second?" Danny asked the rookie and she gladly agreed to it. Then, he looked at Steve. "You. Sidebar."

Kono and Chin watched as the two partners walked away from them.

.

Steve followed Danny into the detective's office. He had no idea what was going on but something was telling him that he would not enjoy that...

"What is it, Danno?" he asked when the blonde closed the door behind him.

When Danny turned to face him, his face was void of everything that was peculiar to him. He was staring blankly at Steve with his arms crossed across his chest. Suddenly, Steve felt like, somehow, they had changed roles.

"What did you do this time, Steven?"

Steve shifted in his place. "What's that supposed to mean, _what did I do this time?_"

"It means what it means. What happened?"

"You do realize that I have no idea what you're talking about, right?"

"Tell me you didn't fight with London over Iraq."

Steve suddenly went serious. He was hoping that a day in the Office without Danny would keep him from having that kind of conversation but, of course, he was terribly wrong.

"Don't get me wrong, Danny, but this-"

"If you say it's none of my business, I swear I'll start swinging. What happened? You called the cavalry to find her and when she's here, you two argue over something like that?"

"You don't know half of it, Danny."

"You're right... I don't know half of it. Just tell me one thing... Did you two argue because she's in the Army?"

Steve just stared at his partner blankly. How the hell Danny knew about London and the Army?

"I don't believe it," Danny said as he started pacing across his office. Steve's silence was a better answer than his words, if he had said any.

"I don't know how you know it, Danny, but I'm not gonna talk about it."

Steve walked with long steps to the door and out of it. He was already mad about what happened last night, the way he treated London, how he let her go again... then he found out about her place in this surgical airborne team and now Danny was there to poke on that wound; needless to say it didn't add to his "_cheerfulness_" one bit.

He walked through the war room silent and into his own office just the same. Steve just needed some time to put his thoughts in order so he could continue to work on the case.

.

Outside, sitting at the regular table with Kono, Grace Williams heard part of the conversation between Danny and Steve. She was concentrated on the drawing she was doing but she couldn't ignore it when her dad's voice said something about the cool doctor she met earlier that day.

Danno had asked Uncle Steve to tell him he didn't fight with London over Iraq. She didn't need much to realize that Uncle Steve was the one she had a disagreement. And, when she saw him walking to his own office, Grace noticed that he was just as sad as she was.

Dropping the pencil she was holding, Grace Williams walked with short steps to the door that was closed just seconds ago.

She heard Auntie Kono talking to her but she kept walking, determined.

Danny had left his office, just in time to see his daughter walking towards one of the glass doors. He followed his child with curious eyes and squinted when she ignored Kono and her small knuckles knocked gently on Steve's door.

.

"Uncle Steve?"

A soft voice brought Steve back from his thoughts. They were all about London and how he couldn't think of a way to make things right... He was a bit scared that, if they talked again, they'd argue again and then they'd be done. He didn't want that.

"Hey, Gracie..."

Steve invited her in and kneeled so he could look at the little girl eye to eye.

"Are you okay?" she asked, stopping right in front of him. Steve felt her eyes watching him intently.

"I'm great," he said with a half smile, pushing a strand of her brown hair behind her ear. Her presence there made things less tough...

"You don't look great," she said sincerely, her eyes fixed on his. "You look sad... like London."

At that moment, Steve felt like he was in a roller coaster and his stomach was twisting and turning inside him. First Danny, now Gracie... Again, he wondered how they knew about London but then he remembered; she said she'd visit Danny and that's probably how Danny knew about the Army and how Grace knew about London. And London was sad...

"Uncle Steve?"

"Yes?"

"Are you mad at Danno? You know, because of— London..."

The way Grace said her name, ever so carefully, watching him intently, as if waiting for the same reaction he just had made Steve frown inwardly. He didn't like the way Danny sometimes pried into his life but he couldn't be mad at the universe... He caused this bitter situation, not anyone else.

"No, Gracie... I'm not mad at Danno. I think... I think I'm mad at myself because I made a mistake."

"Don't be," she said softly. "You can fix it. Just say you're sorry. And mean it."

Steve smiled. The simplicity of what Grace was suggesting was almost obvious, like he'd been missing what was right in front of his nose the entire time.

"Uncle Steve?"

"Yes, Gracie?"

"Why are you still here? Go fix it."

Steve's smile turned into a chuckle. The nine year old Grace Williams was indeed Danny's child. She looked a lot like Danny and even sounded identically like him, with the difference that she didn't push Steve's buttons like her father did - the whole time. Kissing the little girl on the cheek, he stood up and walked out of his office, with Grace holding on to his hand.

. . .


	25. Chapter 25

_**Mele Kalikimaka everyone!**_

* * *

><p>It was near 2pm and a dark blue Chevy Silverado was flying through the streets of Oahu.<p>

After that unusual conversation with Gracie, Danny told Steve that London was on her way to Pearl. He instantly remembered Bennett. He knew that the Lieutenant would be there and, the day before, London said he was an old patient and wanted to see how he healed. Maybe he could find London there and talk to her.

But, the reason why he gave Chin and Kono some quick instructions and asked Danny to help them — staying in the building and not going to the field — for a moment, was that the blonde detective told him that, the way she spoke with him, sounded like someone who's saying goodbye, like she was about to leave Hawaii. And Steve would not let her go. Not like that.

Now, Steve was driving way above the velocity limit but he was still considerably far from the Naval Base. It was like everyone in the Island decided to go to the streets at the same time and at the same day. Okay, it was holiday time but this? The traffic was giving Steve a headache.

"COME ON!" he shouted for the umpteenth time from inside his car to no one in particular.

.

By the time Steve parked his truck inside the military compound, his watch indicated it was 2:17pm. He was supposed to be looking for Bennett but his mind was working on finding London. He hoped she was still there.

_"C'mon London... Where are you?"_

Steve muttered the unanswered question to himself more than just a couple of times as he walked with fast steps through the place. He even asked a few Officers about her buy none of them helped him... yet.

The Five-0 was starting to believe he was too late when he got an answer that was different from the pattern.

"I've seen a pretty woman with Japanese features not too long ago," said a Commander. "I'm sure she's not from the Navy but she looked like she fit here..."

Steve's heart raced. Maybe he wasn't too late.

"Can you tell me where you saw her, Sir?"

"She was heading to the Medical Unit."

That was her, he knew it.

Steve thanked the man properly and hurried to the building he had seen quite a few times when he was in Hawaii, five years ago... At the same time he met London.

He wandered around the corridors for only a couple of minutes when he heard it. It was her voice.

"Are you kidding? This is great. I'm glad to see I didn't screw up..."

Steve turned on his heels and there she was. A few yards behind him, London was cheerfully talking to the man he should be looking for. Gregory Bennett.

"I wasn't worried about that," the Navy Lieutenant replied and they shared a smile.

Steven McGarrett was not the jealous type but, for some unknown reason, he couldn't move. He wanted to walk across the corridor and wanted to talk to London but he didn't. His body wasn't answering to his brain. It was so weird...

Then, he saw Gregory turn his head to where he was standing. Even though they were considerably far from each other, he could see the man's smile and he frowned, but only when the smile grew a bit bigger when he acknowledged his presence there.

London soon followed Gregory's eyes and, differently from the Navy Lieutenant, when she saw Steve, her smile disappeared. Steve couldn't be sure, but he was willing to bet anything she was biting on her lower lip.

"Commander. You're a bit late," Gregory's voice filled the empty corridor and Steve had to swallow the lump that was forming in his throat.

"I had a few problems," he managed to speak when the tall man stood in front of him. His eyes flickered to London, who had joined them, but was standing a bit far from Steve and closer to Bennett. It sure hurt him, but what was really heartbreaking was to see that Grace was right — she looked sad. Really sad. Steve had to clear his throat so he could speak again. Looking at Bennett, he continued: "You said you might have something for me?"

Gregory shifted in his place. "I said I might be able to help you," he corrected.

Steve's brows furrowed. What was the difference? But then, he realized. Subtle wasn't exactly Steve's strong suit.

"Good luck, Commander." And, with a hand salute, Bennett turned around and walked away, leaving the two mute figures standing there.

After a handful of seconds that felt like hours, Steve finally broke the deafening silence that had settled.

"Hey..."

"Hi."

God, this was awkward.

London's voice wasn't louder than a whisper and it was as steady as jello. Steve could perfectly see London's turmoil and it killed him that he was causing her to suffer like that. The last thing in the world he wanted was to see her suffering, let alone be the one to bring her so much pain.

He remembered the London from five minutes ago. Cheerful, smiling, _happy_... He mentally kicked himself for doing that to her.

London watched as Steve's gorgeous features quickly changed into a frown and he looked away. He didn't seem okay and just the thought of it made her heart sank.

Instinctively, she took a step forward, closer to him. His delightful natural scent hit her hard and she had to fight against the urge to wrap her arms around him. It was intoxicatingly good.

"Steve?" Her voice was shaky and London inhaled deeply, trying to control her wild emotions. It didn't quite help her when he looked up and his deep blue eyes met hers. Somehow, she managed to speak again. "Are you alright?"

The hesitancy in her voice spoke volumes to him, and her arms crossed across her chest weren't exactly an encouragement for him to reach out to her.

"Yeah," Steve said running his fingers through his short hair. "Yes, I'm good..."

London nodded automatically. She needed to talk Steve, especially apologize, but she couldn't make the words pass through the lump on her throat; actually, she didn't know what to say. How to say what she needed to...

"London, I'm sorry fo—"

Steve tried to say what he had been thinking of since the night before but London quickly rose her hand and his sentence died almost immediately.

"Steve, don't... Please, don't get me wrong but, not now." She bit on her lip once again; truth was, as much as London wanted to work things out with Steve as soon as possible, she didn't want to do it in the middle of a Naval Base, where Steve once worked. "I've been told you're working on a case right now and I don't want to get in the way, so... we can talk later. Okay?"

Steve thought about that for a second. He was indeed in the middle of an investigation, but he didn't want to wait any longer...

"Alright," he agreed. It wasn't what he wanted to, but he did have work to do.

"Alright," London repeated Steve's words softly. "I'll be at the hotel..."

"London..."

Steve's arms touched her upper arm and London felt her skin tingling beneath his touch and the thin layer of cotton from her long sleeved blouse she was wearing. "I'll be there," she promised.

Steve didn't doubt her words not even for a second. But, just because he trusted her, didn't mean he had forgotten what Danny told him — that he had the impression that London was thinking about leaving.

He had opened his mouth to tell her he'd meet her at the Kahala as soon as he could when his phone rang. It was Danny.

Steve looked back at London with apologetic eyes, but she just smiled weakly at him, after all, he didn't do anything wrong.

She barely heard Steve while he answered the phone call; her thoughts were a mess and she was both glad that he was there and a bit scared. London hated being scared, but lately, she found herself dealing with that more often than she liked to remember. The feeling never had anything to do with her job, but always with her heart.

She was invincible inside an OR, no matter where it was or what resources she had. London was ten feet tall and bullet proof while working. But, whenever she had to deal with her own heart, all of that disappeared. Probably because she couldn't predict the outcome, she couldn't see the future — and oh how she wanted a future with Steven...

London was so immersed in her thoughts — and fears — that she didn't notice when Steve hang up the phone and called for her. Two time. It was only on the third and when his strong hands touched her cheek that she was strongly pulled out of her trance and back to the reality.

"Yes?" she whispered.

"I have to go, but I'll see you at the Kahala as soon as I can."

Steve's deep blue eyes on hers, his warm and strong hand on her skin, the proximity between the two of them was overwhelming and London just shook her head; she didn't trust her voice.

"Please. Wait for me." Steve didn't ask. It wasn't a question. It was a plea. He wanted, needed her to be there.

"I will," she said in between rapid breaths.

Then, Steve couldn't help it. He had her in front of him, his right hand on her soft and warm cheek, her eyes glued to his and he could see her strong reaction to him. He closed the space between them, his left hand flew to her waist and he pulled her for a kiss. A soft and sweet sign that they weren't done.

Their lips touched and they stood still. Neither of them wanted to move and break that moment. It was full of hopes and dreams.

But, just like dreams, that moment came to an end; London made the first move, taking one tiny step backwards and creating a little space between them.

She kept her eyes closed for a couple more seconds before opening to find Steve looking intently at her. She took a deep breath and his perfume hit her with strength enough to knock her down, with the difference that it didn't hurt; instead it was gloriously good.

"You need to go..."

"Yes," he said, still holding onto her. "But I'll be back."

"I know."

If it was possible, Steve would hold her and never let go. But he couldn't. And her soft hands reminded him of that when she took his hands in hers, took a bigger step back and slowly let go of his hands.

"See you later."

Steve stood still for a moment and, when he took a step forward, he soon stopped in front of her. He watched as she nodded shortly and her lips mumbled the word "_go_". And he did as she said, but not before repeating her own words.

"See you later."

.

Steve ran all the way back to his truck.

Danny's phone call was to tell him that Chin and Kono had a suspect. The Lieutenant's clothes were sent to analysis and they found hair on it and a soil sample with unique characteristics. Both things combined lead them to Dennis Hilbert; the victim's father. A war veteran that had been diagnosed with a severe case of PTSD.

While he drove to the address that Danny gave him, Steve felt a very distinct pair of conflicted emotions. He felt a bit better, knowing he'd have a chance to talk to London, but he felt bitter because of the case...

It would be a tough end if they were right.

* * *

><p>London didn't go straight to the hotel.<p>

She assumed it would take him a while to meet her there so she went for a walk. All the memories she had with Steven, big ones and little ones came rushing back into her mind and she couldn't stop. She didn't want to stop.

They had gone through quite a few ups and downs and, in all honesty, they were never there for each other when things got really tough. Steve was gone when Nate died. London was away when John McGarrett was murdered... Of course, none of these things were their fault, and, even though distance got in the way, both still wanted to make things work — and that was more than enough.

She was walking aimlessly at the beach, thoughts coming and going and London eventually came to a halt and sat on the white sand.

With her arms wrapped around her legs, she watched as the waves came to kiss the shore line. Sometimes it was smooth and gentle, sometimes, the kiss was strong and even violent, but it never ceased. Even though the waves made its way back into the ocean, it always returned...

That was London. It was exactly like London. No matter how far, how distant she was, she would always find a way back to Steve, whether in thoughts, whether in a reunion. She couldn't stay away... and she hoped that neither did Steve.

And she was realistic enough to admit that sometimes — like the other night —, just like the waves crashing on the sand, softness was replaced with harshness and she hurt him.

For a moment, London thought to herself if Steve would be better without her, but she soon pushed that thought aside and looked at the bright side. London felt selfish, but she just didn't like to think of her life without Steve, not when he was so close again...

She went back to her hotel, feeling bad for having those thoughts... Like Steve.

He wondered the exact same things when he left the Naval Base and when he was on his way to the Kahala Hotel that night, around 10pm after the Five-0s ended the case where the Navy Lieutenant was indeed killed by the hands of his own father. Tragic, indeed, but, now that this was over, he could only think of what was coming next.

. . .


	26. Chapter 26

_Howdy sailors! Thanks everyone who's reading this story - you guys are the best :)_

* * *

><p>After a long walk on the beach that ended with a lot of a conflicts to her already messed up mind, London was back to the Kahala Hotel. It was near 5pm when she returned to her room, where she promised Steve she'd wait for him.<p>

After taking a long shower, London tried to keep herself busy; she called Hunter, who had messaged her earlier that day and she didn't have time to call back, watched some TV and ate something only so she wouldn't starve.

London was sitting on the left side of the bed, reading a book, when the lack of sleep and tiredness overpowered her and she couldn't put up a fair fight anymore. She did all she could to wait up for Steve but, around 9:30pm, she fell asleep.

* * *

><p>"London?"<p>

Steve had just put one foot inside the ridiculously large room when he called out her name. There was no answer.

"London, are you there?"

The room was still silent and dark, except for a beam of light that was coming from the cracked door of what he knew to be the bedroom. With a low sigh, he closed the main door and walked towards the light.

Steve gently knocked on the door; it was slightly open but he didn't want to startle London. He was just lowering his hand when he heard a cry coming from the other side of the door.

He felt like his heart was beating in his throat and his stomach rolled, twisted then turned into something liquid. He didn't know what he was expecting to find, but his instincts kicked in and he would have kicked the door open if it wasn't closed.

With a strong push, the door went wide open and he hurried into the room.

"London?" Steve felt relief when he noticed that, except for the fact that she was struggling with the sheets, London seemed to be alright.

He climbed onto the bed and tried to approach the squirming figure. When he landed his eyes on her face, Steve scratched his prior thought — she seemed to be in pain.

"London, wake up."

She shivered next to him and Steve's felt his heart growing smaller in his chest as his name slipped from between her lips, along with a painful moan.

Steve reached out and touched her arms softly.

"Wake up, London."

She mumbled a weak sequence of "_no_"s, followed by another spasm.

"London!" He gave her a light shake and finally her eyes snapped open.

"NO!"

London sat bolt upright, eyes widened and gasping for air. Again, she had a nightmare — a very vivid nightmare.

Blinking a couple of times, she tried to push away those images.

_"It wasn't real,"_ London repeated these words mentally like a mantra while breathing slowly to calm her heart.

"It wasn't real..." Closing her eyes, she said it out loud so she could actually believe her own words.

"Hey."

Her eyes opened at the sound of Steve's voice. At first, she stared at him, like she was deciding if he was real or it was just her mind playing tricks on her. But, when he reached out and touched her with only his fingertips, London choked and launched her body forward so she could hold him.

Steve welcomed her readily. He closed his arms tightly around London's shaky body; she felt so small, so fragile... So vulnerable.

"It's alright," he said repeatedly while caressing London's back. "I got you... It was just a dream..."

After a few minutes, London stopped shivering but she still didn't let go of Steve — he didn't move either. With her face pressed against Steve's chest, London spoke with a stuttering voice.

"I'm so- sorry..."

She pulled away from her and he could see the tears strimming down her face and the front of his shirt was soaked wet. Steve felt his heart sinking in his chest.

"I shouldn't ha- have talked to you like I did last ni-night," London continued; her sloppily brushing her tears away. "I shouldn't have left..."

"Hey. Don't... Please." Steve held both her hands and looked deep in her teary eyes. London soon looked away; whenever she looked at Steve, her nightmares returned. It wasn't often but every now and then, she had vivid nightmares where she found Steve in Iraq, of him being one of the victims her team was called to help, she dreamed about losing him. And now, now it was more than she could bear.

"I'm so sorry, Steven..."

"Don't be." Steve cupped her face in his hands and forced her to look at him. He made the tear tracks and the remaining tears vanish with his thumbs. London inhaled deeply. "You didn't do anything wrong... I'm the one who should apologize."

London opened her mouth to say that he didn't have to, but Steve silenced her, pressing one finger against her lips.

"I had no right to treat you like that," Steve continued as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "I had no right to yell at you."

"Steve..." London had freed her lips, taking his hand in hers.

"Let me finish," he said with a brief shake of his head. "When I said you couldn't save everyone... That was stupid. I was."

London shook her head negatively and Steve cupped one side of her face.

"Yes, I was. I can't imagine what it was to you when you lost your mother, then Nathan..." He felt her shiver beneath his touch. "I'm sorry. The Army and all soldiers out there are lucky to have you."

London couldn't help but to shed a tear when Steve smiled warmly at her. His words were so honest, his smile was so sincere and his eyes were the most wonderful eyes she'd ever seen. Ever. Everything about him mesmerized her every time.

"I'm gonna tell you the very same thing I once told your father... I'm the lucky one," she said with a smile that reached her eyes, even though they were wet.

"So... Do you forgive me for being a jerk?"

London chuckled. The way he said it, with a playful tone, caused her to laugh sloppily. She vehemently disagreed with the "_jerk_" thing; in her opinion, Steve was the sweetest guy ever. He would always be.

"Do you forgive me for being a bitch?" she asked just as cheerfully.

"You're not a bitch," Steve replied pulling her closer so their bodies were again pressed together.

"And you're not a jerk."

London felt her heart jumping in her chest with happiness. Their first serious argument was now history.

.

"What were you dreaming of?"

London was struggling with sleep when Steve left the shower. He could see she wasn't exactly looking forward to sleeping...

"Huh?"

Steve could tell that London was, not just tired, but completely drained. He didn't know she hadn't had any sleep in about forty eight hours, but his mind noticed the dark marks around her tired eyes.

The towel he had in his hands was left on a chair and Steve made his way back to the bed.

"What's keeping you from sleeping?" he asked with London held tight against his naked chest.

"It's nothing," she said simply, snuggling up to his body and closing her eyes. With Steve that close, feeling his heartbeats, his breathing, the images of her nightmare seem incredibly dull.

"It's not nothing," he insisted. His fingers slowly combing her long silky dark hair. "I heard it..." London's eyes snapped open. "You said my name," Steve continued but his fingers had stopped and the palm of his hand was resting on her back.

For a long while, London forgot how to breathe; embarrassment taking over her body.

"What was it?"

Silence.

"London?"

Steve tried to make London look at him, but she resisted.

"I... I don't wanna talk about it," she said weakly when she pushed his fingers away from her chin, not allowing Steve to tip her head up.

A deafening silence greeted her ears; Steve didn't insist on that point and, even though she was being spared, London couldn't tell if it was a good or a bad thing...

.

Steve's mind had drifted to something he heard earlier that day. From a shrink that assisted on the case.

_'We all have a little bit of darkness within us. All of us... I'm not explaining Hilbert's father's acts, but it's possible that war made him see his demons through a magnifying glass and, perhaps, sometimes he couldn't keep them from growing again.'_

Steve inhaled deeply. He couldn't help but wonder if London wasn't suffering from PTSD or something like it. In fact, he was so worried about that possibility that, when he heard London's voice again, it almost startled him.

"I'm having nightmares," she admitted weakly after a minute or so.

When she went quiet, Steve imagined that she was sleeping.

"It's not always," she continued to speak, still holding onto Steve. Her hand had flown to his chest and was resting right above his heart, where she could feel his strong heartbeats. "It started in Iraq, about five months after I was deployed."

Without noticing, Steve clenched his jaw and his breathing changed a little. Maybe it was stupid since she was in his arms, safe and sound, but he didn't like to think of London in Iraq.

London noticed the subtle changes in Steve but she chose to ignore them for a while. She needed to let it all out and, if she paid any more attention to his reactions, she wouldn't go any further.

"We were alright," she added, trying to lighten the mood but not succeeding like she expected. "For the most part, we got to stay at a Medical Facility, so it was fine. Until February, 9th, 01:36am. We were sleeping when we were called. There was an explosion about 90 miles from where were and a vehicle that was transporting American soldiers was the target. Our team was ready in no time and, less than three minutes later, we were boarding on a helicopter."

Steve was listening to London's speech intently and with extra attention; he didn't interrupt her hot even for a second. Even his breathing he was trying to control.

"I couldn't tell how long it took us to get to the place but, to me, it wasn't soon enough — I always feared we were a minute too late... When we got there, there wasn't chaos. There were seven injured people and, even though some of them needed immediate and intensive medical assistance, to us, that was a very small number.

"As soon as the chopper landed, I ran to help an Officer with a huge wound on the left side of his abdomen. He had a piece of metal cutting through his flesh and he was in bad shape. It wasn't pretty and he had lost a lot of blood.

"The man needed surgery and blood transfusion, so we did it. In the middle of nowhere, we did everything we could and then some. He made through it and we were able to take him to the hospital we were prior the call...

"On our way back to the hospital, I learned something that changed me. The man I helped was from the United States Navy. His name was Gabriel O'Brien... SEAL."

The hurt in London's voice reflected in Steve's heart. And when she continued, Steve understood what she was dreaming about. And why she didn't want to fall asleep.

"After that, I was so scared to be called and to find you there... hurt."

The last word practically stumbled its way out of London's mouth. Steve felt her body trembling softly in his arms and he tightened the embrace.

"You had nightmares about it," he whispered quietly, more like talking to himself than asking London. She shook her head anyways.

"I wasn't there," he said, using the same soft and low tone.

"I was told after a month or so, when I spoke with Hunter... I asked him — more like cried at him. I couldn't help."

Steve kissed the top of her head dearly. "I'm here now. I'm right here... I got you."

London pressed her body closer to Steve's, not wanting an inch of distance between them.

"Please, don't let go."

"Never."

_Never._

With Steve's promise echoing in her ears, brain, heart and soul, London fell asleep in his arms. No nightmares throughout the night.

. . .


	27. Chapter 27

**Hau'oli Makahiki Hou people!**

_It means Happy New Year in Hawaiian :)_

* * *

><p>"Are you ready?"<p>

"Just five more minutes!"

"You said that five minutes ago, London!"

"Then you should've known that I meant ten, Steven."

Steve sighed resigned. He'd been pacing through the hotel room and staring at the closed door of the bedroom... It was 7:27pm already; he got there at 7:20pm only to pick her so they could head back to his house.

"How do you manage in the Army? Better yet, how did you make it _in the desert_?"

Ever since that night, four days ago, things between London and Steve became lighter and the mention on her career choice didn't bring stress to any of them. Sure Steve still had his reservations towards her decision but he respected and accepted it.

"It's not like we many opportunities to dress up while I was in the Army, or in the desert for that matter," London shouted from the other side of the door.

Steve checked his watch for the umpteenth time. "You do know that we're not going to a fancy black tie party, right?"

"Steve, you sound like a sixty year old grumpy man," she replied opening the door a little bit.

"We're gonna get late for our own New Year's celebration."

Steve couldn't hold back a smile. _We_. _Our_... It sounded way too good when he said those simple words out loud. He was so pleased with the sound of it that he didn't notice when London opened the door and walked through it.

"Relax, sailor," she said sliding her arms around his waist, hugging him from behind. "I'm ready. We can go."

London loosened the hug when Steve tried to turn around and she grinned when noticed the look on his face. Steve couldn't not stare at the sight.

She was wearing a white dress, Marilyn Monroe style and silver high heels sandals; her long black curly hair framing her face and falling down her back, a very light makeup, only to highlight her naturally beautiful features and a reddish lipstick. Steve smiled inwardly and outwardly.

"I think we still have five more minutes," he said pulling London by the waist and placing soft kisses on her inviting lips.

She laughed softly while pushing Steve away only a few inches.

"No," London said half serious, half amused. "We need to go. Your guests will be there soon..."

"_My_ guests?" Steve asked arching an eyebrow. "Who had the idea?"

London glared at him playfully. "Who agreed to it _and_ invited everyone?"

"Point taken," he replied and they both smiled.

Holding hands, Steve and London left the hotel room and head back to McGarrett's place.

* * *

><p>At 9pm sharp, Steve and London had everything ready. The house was perfectly neat and the food was all done — London had spend a good amount of time at Steve's kitchen that day.<p>

Steve was just heading back downstairs after a shower when the door went open without one single knock.

"Uncle Steve!"

The nine year old girl was the first one to run her way into McGarrett's house and towards Steve.

"Heey, Gracie!" Kneeling on the floor, Steve opened his arms and welcomed the smiley kid with a bear hug.

"Thanks for inviting us, Uncle Steve," Gracie said when she let go of Steve and her father stood by her side.

"You're more than welcome, kid," he said offering her a smile.

Gracie was holding on to her father's hand but she soon let go and strolled along the room and into the study, leaving Steve and Danny alone next to the door.

"Didn't know Grace was with you," Steve as he stood up.

"Rachel and Stan went to New York but Grace wanted to stay, so..."

"That's nice... Thanks for coming, Danno."

"You're kidding? A party thrown by Steven J. McGarrett? I couldn't miss it."

The two men smiled.

* * *

><p>"London!"<p>

The Asian woman was just putting the desert into the fridge when she heard her name being called by a very familiar voice. She smiled.

"Hey, beautiful- wooow... where are you going dressed like a princess?"

Gracie smiled ear to ear and twirled, showing off her white dress with a pattern of flowers made of shiny little crystals.

"You like it? Danno gave it to me..."

"If I like it? I love it! It's the most gorgeous dress I've ever seen," London said kneeling on the floor in front of Grace.

"Thanks. You look beautiful too," Gracie said pushing a strand of hair away from London's face. "I like your lipstick."

"Would you like to try it?"

"Can I? Danno says makeup is for grownups only..."

"Of course you can! You know... Danno knows a lot of things, but he doesn't understand makeup like I do." London stood up and offered her hand to Gracie. "C'mon, let's teach him some girl stuff."

With a wide open smile, Gracie took London's hands and on their way out of the kitchen, they almost bumped on Steve.

"Woah!" he shouted holding on to London's waist so they didn't ran over him. "Where's the fire?"

London and Grace just exchanged a smile and, walking around Steve, they ran up the stairs giggling.

Danny was only a few steps behind Steve and he saw the whole thing.

"Are you sure she's in the Army?" he asked when Steve returned with two beers.

"Yes," Steve answered flatly, handing one bottle to the blonde. "Why?"

"She's great with kids."

"And how are those two things even related?"

"I mean she has military background, like you, but she has a way with children, unlike you."

"What are you saying? I'm awesome with kids!"

"You're awe— do I need to remind you of the elevator scene, Steven?"

Danny referred to the one time when Steve scared the hell out of a child while he checked his gun and pushed the elevator buttons repeatedly. Even the boy's parents were scared.

"That was one time only. Ask Gracie. I'm great with kids."

"Sure..."

Their little banter was interrupted by a knock on the door.

* * *

><p>London took Grace to the room that used to belong to Steve's sister, Mary Ann McGarrett whom she hadn't have the opportunity to meet yet.<p>

There was a beautiful dressing-table next to the window and she told Grace to sit on the cushioned seat so while she placed a small bag on the furniture.

"I have red and I have pink," London said holding one lipstick in each hand. "Which do you prefer?"

"The pink one!"

London smiled and put the red back on the bag. A few seconds later, Grace's lips had a light shade of pink coloring it.

"It's pretty," the little girl beamed with delight.

London smiled at the girl's cheerfulness, but noticed when her smiled faded, turning into hesitancy and she looked at her through the mirror.

"Something's wrong, Gracie?"

"No. It's just..." She bit on her lip for a second. "Do you know how to make plaits?"

London's smile returned.

"Yes, I do," she said already combing Grace's brown hair with her fingers. "In fact..." London fished on her bag for a couple of seconds and grinned when she found what she was looking for. "I have something that will fit you just perfectly."

Grace's eyes glowed and her smile grew bigger when she saw what London was holding.

* * *

><p>Chin Ho and Kono got to Steve's place shortly after London and Grace disappeared upstairs.<p>

They were all gathered in the living room before Steve tell Danny to help him to get something to drink and they vanished into the kitchen.

"I thought you said Grace was staying with you," Kono said when Steve and Danny returned with beers to everyone.

"She is," Danny said giving the Asian woman a bottle. "In fact, she's here... Somewhere upstairs with London."

He had just finished his line when they heard thuds on the floor above and soon enough, Grace and London joined them all. All eyes landed on them.

Grace walked with quick steps to her father, while London stood next to Steve.

"Danno, look! I have a tiara!"

In fact, Grace had a tiara. It was a very small but really pretty — it even had some crystals on it — head accessory that London bought for a Halloween party ages ago and that she kept with her makeup only to not lose it. Since she doubted she'd wear it ever again, London decided that Grace would enjoy and wear it better. And she did. With the plait that was resting on her right shoulder, Grace looked adorable with the accessory.

"I can see that, Monkey! You look like a princess! Wait... Is that lipstick?"

Everyone laughed. Even Danny.

* * *

><p>Grace, Kono and London practically stuck together the entire time. So much that Steve, Danny and Chin hardly talked to London, Kono or even Grace separately.<p>

"It's like we're invisible. I'm invisible to my own cousin," Chin joked when the two women walked right in front of them but barely acknowledging their presence there.

"You don't have your cousin's attention... I don't have my girlfriend's!"

"Hey, stop whining, both of you. I don't have my daughter's **and** she's wearing lipstick!"

The three men were serious for a second but soon were laughing. The mood and the atmosphere were very light and peaceful that nothing could really spoil it.

.

They had dinner around 10:30pm and after that, when Grace started yawning.

London saw it and excused herself out, taking the sleepy child with her, back to the living room.

"I don't wanna sleep," she said in between yawns when London told her to lay on the sofa. "I don't wanna miss the fireworks and everything..."

"But there's plenty of time until the fireworks and everything," London said sitting by Grace's side. She yawned again but didn't lay down. "I have an idea. How about you have some rest then when it's five to midnight, I'll wake you up?" Grace looked at her. "I'm fairly certain that you'll enjoy the fireworks better."

Grace seemed to consider that for a moment. She was indeed very tired.

"Promise you'll wake me up?"

"Cross my heart, hope to die."

"Hope to die no. Just pinky promise."

London chuckled. "Pinky promise then."

"Alright."

Grace finally laid on the sofa with extra careful to not ruin her plait or to lose the tiara while London ran upstairs and took a pillow and a thin blanket.

"Auntie London?" Grace called when London was taking her white flats off.

"Yes, darling?"

"Now that you and Uncle Steve are okay... Will you go back to Iraq?"

"I don't know yet, Gracie..."

"He'll be sad if you do."

"I know, I'll be too... but we'll be okay."

Grace just nodded. Her eyelids fluttered and, soon enough, she was sleeping quietly on the sofa.

London pulled the blanket over Grace and pushed a strand of hair away from her face. She stood up but didn't move. She watched the little girl sleep while her mind was assaulted by certainties, doubts and wishes. She knew she'd have to go back to Fort Bragg, she didn't know if she'd go back to Iraq, and she wished for more... More than what she had now...

.

Steve went back into his house to get some water, but he soon forgot about it when he saw London and Grace in his living room. Standing on the space between the room and the study, he watched as London tucked Grace in. He noticed that London had this sad smile on her face. Steve held his breath.

London never ceased to amaze Steve. Never. And now... Now, maybe for the first time in his adult life, he found himself wondering about the future. He could see in London's eyes that she wanted that, what Danny had — she wanted a child. Perhaps, she even wanted a family. And he started to think that he would like to be the father of that child, he started to consider having a family as well. His family...

Walking with short steps, Steve stood by London, slid an arm around her waist and pulled her closer, feeling a flutter in his chest when her arms closed around him and her head rested on his chest.

* * *

><p>As promised, London woke Grace when it was 11:55pm. She was a bit sleepy but when Kono asked for her help to get the champagne (and soda for Grace) for the toast, she soon pushed the haze of sleep aside and hurried to help. She was also the first to run to the beach and wait for the fireworks show.<p>

"Only a minute now," Steve said and Grace beamed.

When it was only ten seconds left, they started countdown and, exactly when they reached the 1, the fireworks started.

"Happy New Year!" They shouted altogether while toasting with champagne and soda.

While Danny bear hugged his daughter and the two cousins smiled and hugged each other, Steve pulled London closer to him.

"Hau'oli Makahiki Hou, handsome," she said sneaking her arms around his neck, careful enough to not pour her champagne down on his brand new white shirt.

Steve chuckled softly. "Happy New Year, beautiful."

New Year, new wishes, new hopes new promises, new possibilities... The whole package was sealed with a sweet loving kiss and the certainty that, no matter what the future holds, they were stronger than ever. Stronger than anything. But all that strength would be put to test, sooner rather than later...

. . .

* * *

><p><em><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I'd like to apologize to you all once again. I'm gonna take a brief hiatus and next chapter might come on January 8th or later because I'm heading back home from my long road trip and I won't have internet access until I get home (finally gonna watch the last two episodes of Hawaii Five-0. God, I miss my babes...). In any case, Hau'oli Makahiki Hou everyone ;D much love and peace and health and all the good stuff! xoxo._


	28. Chapter 28

__**Author's Note:**_ Woot! Got home earlier than I was expecting, so I decided to give you a new update sooner rather than later :) hope you enjoy it!_

* * *

><p>January came and brought with it some agitation.<p>

The first week was mainly punctuated by Danny's return to the Five-0s after ten days of medical leave and, sadly enough, by Mary Ann McGarrett's abduction. London got to meet Steve's sister and she needed to admit, much like Steve, Mary Ann was tough.

Maybe it was because she met Steve's sister under circumstances that were, not the same but oddly alike from when she met Steve and even Danny, — she was the one to provide first medical care to the blonde woman — or maybe it was something else entirely, but London started to think about her own family, more precisely, her only brother... Those thoughts never left and, on January 20th, London made a decision.

It was around 7pm when Steve got back home after a long day dealing with paperwork and some quick field work. His first thought was that London seemed to be a little nervous and he would have asked about it if she hadn't gave him such a passionate and searing kiss as soon as he put one foot inside his house. He forgot about almost everything after that but, later that night, he would find out he was right to think that. London had something for him...

.

"I'll be gone just for a few days," she said running the pads of her fingers along his torso. "A week tops. I promise."

It's been over a month since London got to Hawaii and, even though she spoke quite often with her father, not so often with her brother and still had around a month out of her sixty days leave, London decided to get back and see how things were.

As it was expected, Steve didn't exactly cheered when London told him she would go back to Fort Bragg the very next day.

"Why are you doing this, London?" he asked staring into her pitch black eyes. "Why are you leaving? I don't get it..."

"Don't say that. I'm not leaving," she said softly, taking one of his hands in hers; their fingers entwined. "I just want to see how everything is, check on a couple of patients I had. And I spoke with my dad today... Hunter got back from one of his assignments complaining about an injury he acquired and I'd like to see him. You know me; I'm a bit paranoid..."

Steve didn't say a word, but his serious face showed a small smile as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. They were already in bed and the moonlight was like a spotlight on London, granting her an ethereal beauty that Steve found breathtaking. She even had this sorry look and he knew she had thought about that and reaching that decision wasn't easy.

"I'll be back," she added kissing him softly on the lips.

"You better," he said while letting go of her hand, wrapping his arms around her waist before rolling in bed so that she was on the bottom and he was on top of her.

Steve was supporting most of his weight with his arms not to crush London beneath him, but she pulled him down, closing the small gap between them.

London smiled weakly as she ran her fingers through his short hair.

"I'll mi—"

Steve didn't let her finish her sentence. He silenced her, capturing her lips with his on a heated kiss.

"I'm here," he panted when they pulled apart, their lungs grasping for air several minutes later. "You're here. That's all that matters now."

London smirked. His lips met hers again and they rolled in bed. If she had to say goodbye, even if for a short while, she would do it when it was time. They wouldn't waste the time they had tonight.

* * *

><p>It was nine in the morning when Steve took London to the airport the next day. He had called Danny to tell him he would be late.<p>

"You didn't have to do this, Steven," London said when Steve grabbed her bag and, holding hands, walked with her into the airport.

"Why are we still talking about this?" he asked looking at the woman by his side. London told Steve a thousand times he didn't need to bring her to the airport. She could call a cab and not bother him. "I wanted to. End of story. Or you didn't want me here for some reason I shouldn't know?"

London looked at Steve; he was staring at her with an eyebrow arched.

"Of course not, you dumb face!" London said outraged, punching him lightly on the upper arm. But soon she smiled and slid an arm around his waist. "I just didn't want to bother you..."

Steve smiled in response and kissed the top of London's head.

"When will you learn that you don't bother me, woman?" He held her close to him as they made their way to her boarding gate.

London was starting to feel sad; even though she was worried about Hunter, she didn't like to leave Hawaii, to fly away from her friends — old ones and new ones, away from Steve...

Steve felt London's body stiff by his side and she tightened the grip on his shirt as they stopped in front of her gate.

"I hate this part," she said through teeth and Steve nodded in agreement.

"Me too." He was never fond of goodbyes either. "But we'll be okay..."

London felt his strong hands running up and down her arms and that soothed her. "Yeah..."

She made a tiny turn and locked both her arms around his waist; Steve let her bag rest on the floor and hugged her back, bringing her as close to himself as it was possible.

They stayed like that for only a couple of minutes until London's flight was announced. It was time to board.

"I'll be back before you notice my absence. You won't even miss me."

"I'm already missing you."

London felt her heart sinking in her chest. Was it really necessary? To go through that? There was only one answer: yes, it was. She remembered Nathan and how Hunter wasn't okay... She needed to go there. Even though it hurt to leave everything she had in Hawaii.

Steve saw London's inner conflict through her eyes and kissed her forehead softly. It was okay. Everything would be okay...

"See you soon," she said when her flight was called once again.

"See you..."

From where he was standing, Steve watched as London walked through the gate and towards her plane.

He didn't wait to see her plane take off. When he couldn't see London anymore, Steve turned around and walked away. Back to his routine; it wouldn't be the same without her...

* * *

><p>London's flight in LA delayed and it was half past 7am when London entered Fort Bragg. She was beyond tired but the first thing she did was to head to Hunter's house.<p>

When she was told Hunter was complaining about an injury, she had no idea what that could be. Since she was a kid, London hardly heard her older brother complain about anything; he was a tough guy. Because of that, she should've been waiting for something big, but when she found out that Hunter was still in bed, had a fever of 103 and a ten inch stitched cut on his thigh, London felt her heart in her throat and her knees threatened to buckle.

Letting her baggage rest on the floor, London quickly sent the text message she was typing to Steve, only to let him know she was already home and okay. She also added that it would take a while for her to go back... She'd call, but, since it was 7:42am in North Carolina it should be almost 1am in Hawaii. It was too late and she decided that a text message would do. After that, she focused solely on her brother.

* * *

><p>Steve had just left shower when he saw he received a new text message. After he said goodbye to London, he got a call from HPD requesting help with a case. A girl was found dead and they believed it was work of a gang of some sort. Steve immediately accepted it. Anything to keep his mind busy...<p>

They managed to end the case at 12:15am after HPD and Five-0 carried out a raid, arrested four men and accidentally (but not so much) blew up a meth lab. Steve was home around ten minutes after that. The paperwork was all left for tomorrow...

Steve put the towel around his neck to check the message. It was from London.

_Finally_, he thought to himself. Steve was expecting to hear from London around 11pm... It was already one in the morning; he was starting to worry.

Ignoring his heart that was beating faster, Steve opened it instantly.

_"Hi handsome. I'm in NC. The flight delayed in LA, so it took me a little longer to check in.  
>Also, I don't know when I'll be back. I'll call as soon as I can... Sorry. Miss you already. London."<em>

Steve didn't know what to think of that. London was okay; except for a delay in LA, her flight went well and she was in North Carolina — that was good. But she also mentioned she didn't know when she'd be back — that was not so good...

Before he could think twice, Steve was calling London. She answered after five rings.

_"Hey, thought you were sleeping..."_

"I was working. Just got back home."

_"Oh, right... I forgot sleep is sort of overrated in your line of work."_

Steve chuckled. Even though she sounded in distress, he was still deeply glad to hear her voice and talk to her.

"I got your message. Something's wrong?"

There was a long pause in which Steve heard London take a couple of deep breaths. _"I sure hope not..."_

"What happened?"

_"Remember when I told you my brother returned with an injury and he was complaining about it?"_

"Sure. What about it?"

_"He has a big and deep wound on his left leg. Almost hit the bone and... I'm afraid it's infected..."_

Even though she was trying to keep a neutral tone, Steve could almost feel London's pain and he really disliked to acknowledge it. She had lost way too much already and he knew she was way more worried about it than she was letting it show.

"Hey, your brother has the best help one could ask for. You. He'll be okay."

Steve didn't know Hunter, but he knew London. And if he was just half as brave as she was, then he would be back on duty pretty fast.

Steve heard it when she laughed softly, and he loved the sound of it.

_"Thank you, Steve... Guess I really needed to hear that."_

"Anytime, beautiful. And about you coming back, take your time."

_"Thank you, babe... What would I do without you?"_

"Crash and burn, probably."

London laughed. _"Probably..."_

"Hey, now that you're there and I'm here, don't embrace any opportunity for that to happen, alright?"

_"I should be the one telling you this, not the other way around."_

"I suppose you're right, but better safe than sorry, right?"

_"That's my line."_

"I think you're rubbing on me."

_"Yeah... Maybe I should try blowing some things up, how about that for a perfect trade of places?"_

"Don't even think about it, woman."

The playful tone was almost back to London's voice when Steve heard it when someone called her — Doctor Alexander. It was instantly; she was back to her serious mode.

_"I'm so sorry, babe... I gotta go now... Talk to you later, okay?"_

"Alright..."

_"Alright. Miss you. Bye."_

"Bye..."

Steve whispered to a mute phone. He hadn't have time to say he missed her too when she ended the phone call. But he didn't hold it against her. He understood what she was going through and how she should be trying to be strong. If he could and if there was something he could to to help, he'd go there. But he wasn't a doctor and he had a job in Hawaii. He could live a few days without London... It would be hard, but he knew she was needed in North Carolina.

That night, when Steve went to bed, he felt the coldness coming from the right side of the bed. London's absence couldn't not be felt, it couldn't be ignored. But when he closed his eyes, he found himself with London once again. And he felt her warmth when he closed his arms around her body. She rested her head against his chest and hugged him tight.

"I love you, Steven..."

Her voice echoed in his ears and it remained in his mind for days to come — even after he woke up.

"I love you too, London..."

Steve whispered those words while sleeping, but no one heard the words that came straight from his heart.

. . .


	29. Chapter 29

_Hello guys :D_

_Thanks everyone who's reading! Hope you enjoy & review!_

_Also, on a side note that it's not actually important at all, I should name all my chapters... I kinda want to do this now... oh sigh.  
><em>

* * *

><p>London stayed in North Carolina for a week.<p>

Hunter was way better after three days in the hospital but she only decided to go back to Hawaii when he was discharged and could walk — not without a cane though.

"You. If you think about ditching the walking-stick, I'll fly all the way back here and beat the crap out of you with it, get it?"

Each and every word that London said was punctuated by a poke on Hunter's chest. It was Friday, the 28th, and London was heading back to Hawaii that evening.

"Yes, ma'am," he answered rubbing where her finger had hit him repeatedly. "Ouch... I seriously don't remember you being that bossy... It has to do with your boyfriend."

"_It has to do with your boyfriend_," she mimicked his words with a mocking tone that sounded so not Hunter that he couldn't help but laugh. "And I seriously don't remember you being that whinny... It's like dealing with a baby."

"I really need to have a serious conversation with Steven J. McGarrett. He's doing no good for you."

"Shut up." London punched Hunter softly, but they both were having fun with that. "Please," she said after a few seconds. Her smile slowly faded from her lips as a serious expression settled. "I know it's asking for a lot, especially from someone like you but... take it easy, okay?"

"I'll try my best. I promise."

London looked deep in her brother's eyes and had to bit on her lip.

"You'll do better than try. I spoke with your superior..."

Hunter was suddenly dead serious. Even though he had this fiery look in his eyes, London didn't shiver. She was expecting for that reaction.

"London..."

"Do not _'London'_ me. I had to. As a doctor, I had to do it. You can hate me as long as you want to, but you won't be assigned to any missions for twenty days."

"Twenty days? London!"

"Consider yourself lucky," she said raising her voice just a little, only to overcome his complaints. "Look, I get it. What you do is part of you, part of your identity, believe me, I get it. But you can only push your body to a certain limit before it gives up, and you need to believe me when I say, you were pushing it too far." London noticed in Hunter's eyes he wanted to reply to that but she raised a hand, silencing him. "**You were pushing too far, Hunter.** And I'm not saying this just because I'm your sister... Ask any doctor you want and they'll put you on the penalty box at least a month and a half. But I know you. I know how you work. I know you better than anyone and you know me. You know I care about you, so you need to trust me... I know you can't tell me everything about your work or whatever. I know that. But I need you to understand that, just because you're a Delta, it doesn't mean your body will endure everything without a consequence because it won't, so suck it up and deal with it. I don't need to see anyone else fall. I really don't need that..."

Hunter felt his heart breaking. He knew exactly what she was talking about even though she was avoiding the subject. He knew she was being extra careful with him because of what they've been through thus far. He could see in her eyes that Nate's death was still a delicate subject for her...

"Okay, sis," he said taking a step forward and hugging her. "I'll do as you say."

"Thank you... And use the cane."

He had let go of the damn stick for two seconds but they were just enough for her to notice it. She handed it back to him but with a small smile on her face.

"I hate this thing," he said grumpy while taking it back.

"News flash, babe. _Nobody cares_," she replied cheerfully.

"Get out of my house!"

Hunter playfully pushed London towards the front door. She laughed easily and grabbed the handle of her carry-on luggage that was next to her. He stopped when she stood in front of it.

"Please," she said, holding the cool handle tightly in her grip. "Be a good boy, just once..."

Hunter used his free arm to pull London for a hug. "I will," he promised, kissing the top of her head. She let go of her baggage and closed her arms around her brother's waist.

The two of them were still holding onto each other when someone knocked on the door.

London disentangled herself from Hunter's arm and looked at him curiously.

"Are you expecting visitors?"

"Not that I know of... You?"

"Not really..."

She had called a cab but never in her life had London heard of a taxi driver who knocked on the door. With a curious frown, she opened the door slowly to find a man wearing uniform standing on the porch.

"Can I help you, Corporal?"

Hunter had taken the place next to London and was looking at the man with the same dubious expression his sister had.

"Yes, Major. Colonel Eckhart wants to speak with Captain Alexander. He says it's urgent."

Hunter and London exchanged a suspicious look. She knew Colonel Derek Eckhart — he was one of the responsible for the 44th Medical Brigade — but she couldn't fathom why he wanted to speak with her, urgently.

London checked her watch. Her flight was at 10:45am so she had a little less than two hours to get to the airport. Whatever the Colonel had to talk to London, regardless of its urgency, it had to be fast.

"Please, watch my baggage, Hunt. I'll get it when I'm out." Then, stepping outside Hunter's house, London turned to the Corporal who was waiting for her. "Alright. Let's go."

.

When Hunter closed the door after London left, he felt something wasn't right.

Forty five minutes later, when London barged into his place, almost walking through the closed doors, he knew the unexpected meeting didn't go right...

* * *

><p>"So, G.I. Jane arrives today?"<p>

Steve and Danny were heading back to the Five-0 headquarters after finishing a kidnapping case. Kidnappings were always tough cases especially when there were little children involved, which, sadly enough was what they had.

The guy escaped prison and was trying to get out of the Island with his two sons. Thanks to the brilliant work of the Five-0 Task Force and HPD, his plans went downhill. The two boys returned, safe and sound, to their home and the guy, back to jail. A good end to a good day, except, Steve's day still wasn't over.

"Yes, she does," Steve answered Danny's question. He knew that by G.I. Jane, his partner was talking about London. "I'll pick her at 8pm."

"I think you'll be late... It's already 6:45pm and you definitely, definitely need a shower. You're stinking."

Steve looked at his partner with the corner of the eye and with a cocked eyebrow.

"What? Don't look at me like that... It's true."

Steve vehemently disagreed with the stinking part but it was true that he needed to get home, shower, get dressed and get to Honolulu International Airport. Everything in about an hour. It was a tight schedule but he'd make it.

Since he was the one behind the steering wheel — as usual — Steve hit the gas pedal and the speed of the Camaro increased and he watched rather cheerful when Danny held onto the seat when he made a sharp turn to the right.

"Dear Lord, why didn't I keep my mouth shut?"

.

Steve was still hearing Danny's words telling — actually, he was yelling — him how he'd cause an accident driving like a lunatic when he parked his truck in his driveway.

He checked his watch. It was 7:16pm. Plenty of time.

Steve literally ran into his house, climbed the stairs two steps at a time and rushed into the bathroom. There was a little bit of traffic and he didn't want to be late.

At 7:30pm he was ready.

He had the keys held tight in his grip and was almost in the middle of the stairs when he noticed he wasn't alone. There was someone in his living room.

His first reaction was to reach for his .9mm that he kept on his ankle but he soon ditched it when he recognized the person. He jumped the last three steps of the stairs.

"Hey," Steve said walking with quick steps to meet with his unexpected visitor. "I thought you'd be here at 8, it's sti—"

London didn't let him finish and interrupted his sentence cupping his face with both her hands and kissing him full on the lips.

Steve dropped the keys to the floor and locked his arms around her waist. Oh how he missed that soft skin close to him, that wonderful perfume that only London had numbing all his senses and knocking his thoughts, the heavenly taste of her sweet, loving kisses. It was only a week but he missed her desperately. Apparently, so did London.

After a minute or so, Steve's lungs were burning for air and he was forced to break the kiss. The cool air burned its way down his throat.

"Hey..."

"Hi..."

"When did you get here?"

"Around 7:15. I changed my flight for an earlier one..."

"I can see that. Welcome back."

Steve had pulled London closer to him once again and, even though she smiled at him, he saw in her eyes that she didn't seem to be exactly happy about it.

"Something's wrong?"

London shifted her eyes away from Steve's. If there was something wrong? Yes. Definitely yes. But how to tell him that?

"London?"

She didn't hear Steve; the meeting she had with Colonel Eckhart earlier that morning was speaking volumes and she couldn't shut it off.

—

_"Captain Alexander," his grave voice greeted London as soon as she walked into his office._

_"Colonel Eckhart." Even though she wasn't on duty, she gave him the standard military hand salute once she stood in front of him._

_"Please, have a seat."_

_"If you don't mind, I rather stand, sir."_

_London knew that Colonel was aware of the fact that she was on her way back to Hawaii and she really wasn't willing to not board on that plane._

_"Alright. As you wish... So, I won't stall and waste our time with unnecessary talk. I need you to join the 541 earlier."_

_London didn't even bother hiding her surprise and shock. She was on leave; she had just returned from Iraq for Christ sake!_

_"I'm sorry, what?"_

_"Lieutenant Annelize Preston is pregnant and was reassigned to assist the Fort Bragg community instead of going on combat support missions. The 541 is down one officer."_

_"Forgive me, sir but... Lieutenant Preston is a critical care registered nurse. I'm a general surgeon. I don't see how..."_

_"You're our best available resource, Captain, and we need you. Can we count you in?"_

_"I don't think I have a choice here, am I right, Colonel?"_

_"In all honesty, no, you don't, Captain."_

_"Alright then, sir... Can I go now?"_

_"Not yet. There's something else..."_

—

"London!"

Steve didn't like raising his voice at her but, since all his other attempts to get her attention failed, he had to do it. Also, her lack of reaction was starting to worry him so he also grabbed her by the shoulders and gave her a slight shook.

London snapped out of her trance and, after blinking a couple of times, found Steve's eyes. She noticed they were deep dark blue, almost edging black.

"Yes?"

"For God's sake, woman. What's happening?"

She opened her mouth but no words came out of it, so she closed. Her brain was quickly trying to form just one sentence and she was trying so hard to just say the words out loud but she couldn't.

"London, please, talk to me."

Talk. Steve's request was so simple yet, so hard... London opened and closed her mouth once more. She felt like, if she voiced it, it would be real, and if she didn't do it, then it would be all just a weird memory that could have been from a dream... But it wasn't a dream.

Steve ran his fingers through her hair, pushing it all back as slid an arm around her body. She looked pale like she was about to pass out.

"Babe, please..."

"I... have to go... back..."

London's voice wasn't louder than a whisper and Steve was so worried with her paleness and everything else that he didn't hear it at first.

"I'm sorry, I don't—"

"I'll have to go back."

This time, her words were loud and clear, but they didn't make any sense to Steve yet.

"What do you mean, go back? You just got here..."

London rested her head on his chest. That was seriously the worst way to start a year...

"My leave was cut shortly."

Steve felt his world had stopped for a moment. This was not happening. London had a sixty days leave and there were over twenty days left, how was that even possible?

"Why?"

"My unit is one down. Then need me."

"There's no one else available?"

"Technically, there are. But none of them are... qualified."

Steve knew what she meant. None of them were qualified to take the place of an Airborne — none of them were London Alexander.

"When?"

"Sunday."

"Sunday?"

"I have to be there Monday morning..."

Steve ran his hand through his face and turned his back to London for a second. She didn't need to see the rage that was staring to build inside him.

"What happened to this surgeon?"

"She's pregnant," she said flatly. "Since she's a Lieutenant, she had been reassigned to Fort Bragg."

"Then it might take a while." Steve wasn't exactly talking to London, he was actually just thinking out loud.

"There's something else," London added after a handful of seconds.

Steve turned on his heels slowly, afraid of what else she had for him.

"Please, don't say—"

Her eyes met his and she voiced the exact same thing he was desperately trying to block and deny in his head.

"I'm being deployed."

. . .


	30. Chapter 30

_Hi guys! So, new chapter and I really, really wanted to hear what you people think about it and the whole story thus far. I'm having a hard time writing thgings because I don't know if I'm doing it right... Hope you enjoy & review.  
><em>

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><p>Steve couldn't sleep that night. He just laid there, seeing, hearing and living the conversation he had with London after her return over and over again and he couldn't do anything to keep those thoughts away... He tried, but it was like they had its own life and want, and it was pretty clear that they wanted to drive Steve insane — or at least push him to his limit.<p>

—

_"I'm being deployed."_

_London's words fell like a bomb in Steve's world. Obviously he was sort of expecting for this day to come; only he wasn't expecting it to be so sudden, so fast... Perhaps in a month or so. Nothing like this, for sure._

_For a few seconds, Steve didn't say a word, moved one muscle, anything. He just stood there like a stone. He was flabbergasted, bewildered, and angry all at once but he didn't know what to do. Actually, he couldn't do anything about it. He didn't even know what to say... He just went numb._

_The silence was deafening but, when Steve finally broke it, London felt like it was even more overwhelming than the lack of sound. The quietness she could handle, even if it was just barely; the need to speak and turn it all even more real was edging unbearable._

_"When?" he asked quite bluntly, but she choose to ignore that detail._

_"Monday... Oh six hundred hours."_

_Steve pressed the palm of his hands on his eyes as he started to pace around the living room._

_"That's why you have to go back Sunday," Steve mumbled while walking in circles. It wasn't a question. "Where?"_

_"Afg... Afghanistan." London tried to keep her voice steady but failed. It was like the air had become thicker and it was hard to breathe. It was suffocating._

—

Afghanistan.

Lying on his bed, holding tightly onto London, like his life depended on it, Steve started to think about the place she was going. He'd been there for a very short while, during the time he was after the Hesses...

Then, the constant repetition of the talk with London changed to what he had seen in Afghanistan. The conflicts, the shootings, the explosions, the destruction... London was heading to a war zone, and Steve defined it with three little words: blood, pain, death.

Steve tried to shake the images off and closed his eyes — needless to say it didn't really help at all. If anything, it only made things a bit worse. He saw London in the middle of all that and the simple thought of it scared the hell out of him. He snapped his eyes open almost immediately and, unconsciously, tightened the embrace around London's body.

.

The clock on Steve's bedside table was indicating it was 3:05am.

London had her eyes fixed on it and saw every single change on the numbers since she and Steve headed to bed. She didn't sleep, even though she was beyond tired. She couldn't bring herself to close her eyes for longer than half a second because she didn't want to waste the time she had with Steve...

London didn't question the reasons behind all this. She wasn't sure if she believed in destiny, fate, doom or anything like that and she wasn't willing to start pondering about it right now. But she sure disliked how things were happening. After so many ups and downs, London and Steve were finally okay... until now.

Now, she would leave. Again. It was all bittersweet, as always. Deep down, London was still happy to be able to help people out there, she didn't regret her decision. But the problem was, when it was bitter, it was damn bitter.

London had one arm across Steve's torso, keeping him always close to her, as he had his arm around her waist. The two of them have been immobile for over two hours until London felt Steve shudder lightly and pull her a bit closer to him, his arms tightening around her body.

"You're still awake," London whispered softly as she looked up at Steve. His eyes were open, fixed on the ceiling.

Steve instantly looked at London and found her black eyes locked on him. "Did I wake you up? Sorry about that..."

"I wasn't sleeping," she said gently while running the tip of her fingers up and down his naked chest. "I can't..."

"Neither can I."

London snuggled up so Steve and rested her head on his chest. Then, to his surprise, she started singing in a low and soft voice that wasn't much different than a whisper.

"_I could stay awake, just to hear you breathing..._"

He smiled.

"_Watch you smile while you are sleeping_," he tried to continue, but felt a finger against his lips silencing him and she had tipped her head up again so she was looking in his eyes.

"I must say I'm quite impressed you know this song but we're not sleeping, silly..."

"I not only know this song, but I also know the movie. And true that."

London got back to her position, head on his chest and pressing her body as closer to his as it was possible.

"_I could spend my life, in this sweet surrender; I could stay lost in this moment, forever..._"

Steve kissed the top of her head. "_Cause every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure._"

London felt a sharp pain in her heart.

"_I don't wanna close my eyes..._"

Steve hugged her even closer.

"_I don't wanna fall asleep cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing..._"

"_Cause even when I dream of you._"

"_The sweetest dream would never do._"

"_I'd still miss you, babe._"

"_And I don't wanna miss a thing..._"

Hearing Steve sing, actually, whisper the song with her was quite marvelous but, after he completed her line, she couldn't keep going. It was too much.

Steve could tell, only by the way London was forcing the air down her lungs, that she was fighting against her feelings. He knew how hard it was for her this moment; he had been there before.

He kissed the top of her head as he ran his hands up and down her back. There wasn't much he could say that would ease the pain right now... It was still too raw. Not that they'd have time to adjust but still...

"It does look like Armageddon, doesn't it?" London's weak voice made Steve stop and look at her, but she didn't look back at him. Not immediately. "I mean, if you ignore the fact that no one is going to outer space to try to blow up an asteroid that's about to extinguish the whole human race and planet Earth..."

Once again, despite everything else, Steve found himself smiling mildly. How could she do that? So easily. So effortless...

"Can we also ignore the fact that your father hates me?"

"Woah, wait... I am not Liv Tyler here," she said, finally looking at Steve.

"So, I'm Liv Tyler and you are that dude I can't remember the name..."

"I am Ben Affleck. Yes. Precisely."

Steve frowned at her. He could see her eyes were slightly wet but, more than that, she was smiling. And it was a smile that reached the eyes. God, that woman was unique.

"Huh... Shouldn't you give me a ring then?"

"Oh, that... Let's just forget about that, okay?"

Steve chuckled.

"You are a lousy Ben Affleck," he said framing her face with his hands and leaning forward to kiss her.

"And you are a desperate Liv Tyler! That's so out of character," she replied while crawling on the bed so she was on the same eye level that Steve.

"You're the one who's not following the script," Steve retorted rolling on top of London but supporting his weight on his arms to not crush her.

"And you're the one who forgot this is an adapted version of it," she replied rather cheerfully while running her fingers through his hair. "Like I said, I'm not going to the outer space..."

Steve sighed and his head dropped a bit.

"I sort of wish you were..."

Again, London felt like there was a knife on her chest and someone just nudged it deeper. She cupper his face in her hands and brushed his cheeks with her thumbs.

"I'll be fine."

"I know."

Steve was struggling to believe her words and his words as well. Truth was, he was scared. Scared like he had never been before.

London slid her hands to his neck and pulled him down, closing the gap between them. Their lips met and London wished for the world to stop. She really could stay lost in that moment forever...

* * *

><p>Steve found himself standing by London's side, along with her brother and her father. He inhaled deeply when saw her uniform. That was it. It was time to say goodbye. Again.<p>

London held tightly onto her father and brother. It was still just as hard as the first time...

"It never gets better," she thought to herself.

"It will get better when you're back," Hunter whispered in her ear as they pulled apart. Maybe she didn't just think those words.

"Stay strong, soldier."

London felt tears coming to her eyes when her dad said those words. Her dad. Somehow, he managed to be there again.

"Yes, sir," she said in a half whisper, trying to hold back the tears and trying very hard not to sob.

"Be safe, sweetheart."

London saluted them as they do in the Army. Then, she turned to face Steve.

"You don't look so tough now, sailor," she said with a sad perkiness.

Steve had to force a smile. He knew she was doing her best to not make things even harder; he'd do the same.

"Maybe I'm not," he said running his thumb down the left side of her face. Her curly black hair was pulled up in a bun and he couldn't help but notice that she fit there. She fit in the Army.

London smiled back at him. A sad smile though.

"Don't worry. It'll all be alright... I'll be fine."

"Just come back safe, okay?"

"Roger that."

Steve couldn't hold it anymore and pulled London for a hug. She held onto him just as tightly.

"Steve." She murmured quietly, her head resting against his chest and her eyes were shut closed.

"London..."

"Steve..."

This time, Steve frowned. If he knew better, Steve would say she was in pain. Physical pain. And_ he knew better_.

He opened his eyes and noticed that things had changed. They weren't at the airport anymore. They were in the middle of — a desert? And London...

"Oh God." London was injured. There was blood — a lot of blood — and she had a giant hole in her abdomen. So big he could put his hand inside it and it would fit perfectly.

"How did this...?"

"Help me," she pleaded; when she did so, London spat blood and it landed on his white T-Shirt. Steve looked at it, helpless. "Please... Steve."

When she grabbed his wrists as tightly as she could, Steve snapped out of his trance and realized, if he didn't do anything, she would die. In his arms. He couldn't allow it.

"Okay," he said in between rapid breaths as he lay London on the ground. "Hold on, I just need to—"

Steve froze. He didn't have anything with him. And he was alone. What the hell?

"St- Steve..." His attention was pulled back at the agonizing woman on the sand. He took off his T-Shirt and used it to apply pressure and try to stop the bleeding. It was damn hot, he was in the middle of the desert shirtless, he'd probably suffer from sunstroke later, maybe some nasty sunburns but he didn't mind. He needed to help London. How did they get there in the first place?

"Just hold on. Please, just."

Steve felt him shivering beneath her hands and his heart stopped for a second. He was no doctor but he knew that could not be good.

"St- Steve... You nee... You need to he- hear me out..."

"Shut up. Stop wasting your energy."

"Babe, li- listen to me."

She grabbed his hands and Steve looked directly at her. She was pale and looked like she had lost weight and... oh Lord, there was blood in the corner of her lips...

"Please, just stop talking..."

Steve couldn't help it anymore. He was watching the love of his life die in front of his eyes and he couldn't do anything to prevent it. He wasn't trained to do this. She was! London was.

"Y-You... are the... best thing... the. best. thing... that ev-ever happen—"

Her sentence never had an end and Steve found himself staring at her eyes. They were lifeless.

"No... No, no. London... _London!_"

Steve sat bolt upright on the bed. His breathing was heavy and his heart was pounding like he had ran a marathon. He pressed the palm of his on his eyes, trying to inhale and exhale calmly. It was just a dream. A terrible and quite awful nightmare.

"London?" He looked around to find that the bed was empty. Actually, the room was empty, it was all too quiet and it was 8:22 in the morning. Damn...

Steve thought about reaching for the gun he kept in the drawer of the bedside table but soon dismissed that idea. Instead, he just jumped out of bed, quickly put his pants on and headed downstairs.

"London?" The living room was also dead empty. "London, where are—"

He stopped when he got to the lanai; London was sitting on the beach. He then resumed his walk and, with short steps, Steve went to join her.

"Hi, beautiful." Steve sat behind London and pulled her to him so her back was pressed against his chest.

The sand, London in his arms, the sun above them... the whole scenario brings flashes of his dream and a shiver goes down his spine. Steve slid his arms across her abdomen and let them rest there, deeply glad to see she's whole. London is alright.

"Why are you hiding here?" he asked after kissing her neck softly.

"Morning, handsome," she said resting her head on his shoulder. "Not hiding. I was just... sitting here, admiring the view." London was to add "while I can" but didn't — it sounded too ominous. "Did you sleep well?"

"Hardly. How about you? Did you sleep at all?"

"Oh yeah," she said reassuringly. "Solid fifteen minutes. I'm brand new."

Steve wanted to tell her how this was wrong, how she needed to be at her best and all this crap he heard countless times before but never actually made him change; maybe she would listen to him and do as he said but he knew it wouldn't happen, so, he didn't say a word. Instead, he small smiled when he heard the sound of London's soft laugh.

"We should do something today," she added after a minute or so. "What about hiking?"

"That does not sound like a good idea whatsoever," Steve said vehemently. Not when he slept for a couple of hours and London... that doesn't even count. "What about a movie?"

London turned so she was staring at Steve. He thought she had the most hilarious expression of disbelief in her face and had to bite on his lip not to laugh at it.

"Seriously, Steven?"

"What?"

"Never mind..." Then, she remembered one thing she did with her brothers and some friends when they were to leave. "Hey, do you happen to have a football?"

* * *

><p>Before 9:30am, Steve's house was full of people. Well, not exactly full but Danny, Chin, Kono and Grace were there.<p>

London had dug out one of her Cowboy's shirts that she had brought and Steve was wearing one from his old school Football team and, somehow, their quiet Saturday soon became football day and that's how they spend that morning, until around 1pm.

While Steve was making lunch — the best steak in the Island —, London excused herself and went back inside. Danny noticed Steve's face as he followed every step she took with his eyes until she couldn't be seen anymore. There was something very unusual in his partner's expression but he didn't say anything. Not at first.

Later that day, after Chin and Kono left and London was in the living room watching TV with Grace, Danny notice again his partner's fixed gaze on his girlfriend and, this time, he thought he saw hints of sadness in his eyes. That was strange.

"Something's wrong?"

Steve didn't answer at first. It took him a while to realize that Danny was talking to him. "What? No. Why?"

"You're looking at London like she's gonna disappear into thin air... What's the matter?"

Steve shifted his eyes to the ocean outside and finished his beer before evasively state that it was all good while walking into the kitchen.

"Please, don't do that. Do you think I'm that dumb? Stop, okay. Stop lying to me. I know you fairly well and I can tell—"

"Alright, you won!" Steve said raising a hand to make Danny stop talking. They were in the kitchen but it was close to the living room so Steve and Danny were careful enough to not raise their voices and be heard. "You won... Things aren't so good."

"What happened?"

Steve put his empty bottle on the sink and fixed his eyes on the window only to avoid Danny's eyes.

"London is leaving again," he said, still not looking at Danny. He didn't want him to see how upset he was.

"What? But she just got back... Why?"

Again, a full minute of silence before Steve could answer that question. "She's gonna be deployed."

"No... Oh man... That's... That's—"

"Yeah. I know."

"When?"

"Monday morning," he said leaning against the sink.

Danny occupied one of the seats on the table and waited quietly. He knew Steve and, even though he was a master in compartmentalization, he knew the tough Navy guy was having quite a hard time compartmentalizing that. After a couple of minutes or so, he heard Steve's voice again.

"I'm not gonna take a couple of days off, Danno." It was a done deal, not up for any discussion — not that there was any.

"Okay. No problem. You just go do whatever you need to do. We can handle everything here."

Steve nodded blindly as his eyes landed on his watch. It was already close to 8pm. The day was almost over and he didn't like to think about the next one. He sighed heavily, pushed his body away from the sink and returned to the living room, where London and Grace had fallen asleep on the couch.

"Monkey?" Danny walked towards his daughter and shook her softly. "Wake up, honey. Time to go."

London was the first one to be pulled out of dreamland — even though she wasn't having any dreams — and she found Steve's eyes watching her tenderly. She almost didn't hear it when Danny whispered his apologies; offering him a kind smile, London sat, waking Grace, who was using her arm as a pillow.

"Auntie London?"

Grace yawned and rubbed her eyes when London gently pulled her arm from beneath her head.

"Hey, princess," she said brushing a strand of hair away from the little girl's eyes. "Sorry to wake you up but your daddy is here."

"Danno?"

"Hey, Monkey. C'mon... We need to get you back to your mom or she'll kill me," he told Grace was again yawning. Then, he turned to London. "It's okay, I got her."

London stood up shortly after Danny took Grace in his arms, but she was beyond drained and almost fell back on the couch when a pair of strong arms held her.

"Easy there, tiger."

"Thanks," she whispered to Steve.

"I think someone else here needs a bed," Danny said looking at the two of them, with his child holding onto his neck.

"I think so too," London said with a thin smile while sliding an arm around Steve's waist.

"Thanks for everything," Danny said looking at Steve and London — who was still bravely fighting a lost battle against sleep.

"Thank you for showing up," London said, walking with Steve towards the door.

Danny smiled.

"Hey, Monkey... Say goodbye to Uncle Steve and Auntie London."

Grace turned her head a bit so she was looking at the couple by the door. "Bye Uncle St-Steve... Bye Auntie London... Thanks for the am-amazing day."

London smiled and waved goodbye, but not letting go of Steve.

"You are more than welcome, Gracie." Steve waved goodbye to the little girl who had already rested her head against her father's shoulder. "And thank you, Danno."

Danny knew that Steve wasn't just talking about him being there today. It was about him hearing Steve when he needed — even though he didn't know he needed — to talk and when he accepted nicely when he said he'd be away from the Office a couple of days.

"Always, man."

"Daddy, can I sleep at your house tonight?" Grace mumbled.

"We should talk to your mom about it, Monkey, but yes, you can. You can do anything..."

Danny smiled and waved goodbye to Steve and London while heading back to his Camaro.

They waited until he had pulled out of the driveway to go back inside. London was almost sleeping by his side when Steve closed the door.

"Can you make it to the bedroom?" he asked to the half awake, half asleep woman that was still holding him.

"I don't know if I can even make it to the couch," she whispered, struggling to keep her eyes open.

Steve smiled and took her in his arms, bridal stile, and walked her all the way to his bedroom.

He had just carefully put her on the bed and was about to walk to his closet to get his pajama pants when her hand closed around his wrist.

"Don't go. Stay with me..."

Even though she had her eyes semi closed and was almost dozing off, Steve noticed a certain urgency in her voice. It opened a cut in his heart. Knowing that he'd be away from her, wounded him deeper than any physical injury he'd ever suffered.

Steve forgot about pajama pants and anything else. He just slid under the covers, closed his arms around London and kissed her forehead gently.

"Sure, beautiful... Anything you ask..."

. . .

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><p><em>So, what do you think? Feedback is highly appreciated! Mahalos to my beloved &amp; faithful readers<em>.


	31. Chapter 31

_I'd like to thank those who reviewed my last chapter; mahalos to _**LadyAilith**_ f__or such kind words and for saying I'm doing it right (that was a huge encouragement! Thank you so very much!)_

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><p>"Steve... What is this?"<p>

London asked when they were about to leave to the airport. She woke up the next day around six thirty in the morning; her flight was at 8:15am and she needed to be at the airport at seven, seven thirty tops.

Her baggage was all ready and she didn't have much — only her carry-on luggage she brought when she first came to Hawaii — so she didn't quite understand when Steve appeared carrying her luggage and a small bag.

"This?" Steve asked when he put the smaller black bag on the back seat his truck. "Oh, this is mine." London squinted and Steve smiled when he saw her reaction. "I'm coming with you."

London's eyes met Steve's and she did nothing but stare at him. Steve could almost see the gears turning in her head as she processed the information. He also the shock in her eyes, which was mixed with disbelief at first, but then it evolved to something he couldn't exactly name because it was too confused.

"A- Are you serious?" she asked about a full minute, maybe a little bit more.

"Well, yeah," Steve said with a shrug. "But don't worry, I booked a hotel online, very close to Fort Bragg, so I wo—"

He didn't finish his sentence. London had opened a huge smile and launched her arms around his neck and sealed his lips with hers so talking was something that Steve couldn't do for a moment. He slid his arms around her waist and locked them there so they were practically glued together. Chest to chest, her lips upon his lips, lost in each others arms.

"Thank you," London whispered when they broke the kiss and pulled a few inches apart, their foreheads resting against each other's though.

Steve smiled.

"You are more than welcome... I couldn't stay here while you're in North Carolina, even if for a day... I wouldn't have it any other way."

London's smile grew bigger and, as she did, a single teardrop fell from her right eye.

"Please, don't cry," Steve pleaded, brushing the tear away. "I hate to see you crying."

"I'm not crying, it's just a happy tear," she said, placing her hand over his. "I'm happy that you're coming... And you are **not** staying at a hotel, but..." London looked to the right, where Steve had just put their bags inside his truck. "What about your car?"

"I called Danny; he'll be at the airport and will take it."

"Wow. That is very convenient... Especially because it's not even seven in the morning of a Sunday, Steven."

London eyed Steve but he just chuckled.

"Relax," he said placing a soft kiss on her lips. "It's all good. Danno is like family."

"If you say so..."

.

Danny wasn't at the airport when Steve and London got there. Someone else was.

"Trying to leave without saying goodbye?"

London quickly turned her head when she recognized that voice. She didn't expect to hear it.

"Claire!" London walked with quick steps to her friend and hugged her. "What are you doing here? I called the hospital yesterday and they said you'd be working today..."

"I should be," she admitted not so shyly. "But I needed to come and say goodbye to my best friend, right?"

"How did you even know I was leaving?"

"Well, I got a call," she said taking a small step to the side and waving to Steve, who just had waved at her. "Five-0, you know? I thought it was important. I mean, whenever I hear the name McGarrett, I know something's about to happen..."

"Steve..."

He just smiled at London and she smiled back at him while squeezing Claire's hands. She got to spend time with her old friend and she thought she'd leave without speaking to Claire. Or Nick, who was also there.

"Take care out there, would ya?" he said, taking Claire's place and pulling London to a bear hug.

"I'll do my best."

"Do better than your best," Nick said pulling away and looking at her. "I know you can do that."

London smiled even though that was the second time she had to say goodbye to them. That was kind of crazy... But what was really crazy was when she saw Nick and Claire holding hands.

"Wait, are you two...?"

Nick and Claire looked at each other and smirked. Smirked!

"Well, yeah," she admitted. London's eyes widened.

"But you..."

"We worked our differences," Nick explained quite cheerfully.

"Wow... Wow, that's... Amazing! I'm super happy for you two!"

"Well, thank you," Claire replied with a wide open smile. "Thank you. I thought, you know, since you and Nick..."

"Oh, please. No. Absolutely not. That's in the past and I'm really happy that you two are happy. It's so much happiness and you guys deserve it."

Claire let go of Nick's hand for a brief second to hug London one more time.

"I'll miss you, London. More than the last time..."

"Oh... I'll miss you too."

The two women pulled apart and London noticed the little glow in Claire's eyes.

"Just, come back. Safe and sound, okay?"

London nodded.

"You have to get back, London. Do you hear me?"

"Alright. I get it. I'll get back."

"Good... Because I really would like to have you as my maid of honor."

This time, not only London's eyes widened, but her mouth hang slightly open. She even had to reach for Steve, who had been watching the whole thing silently, right behind her.

"You... what?" London asked bewildered.

"My maid of honor," Claire repeated her words slightly carefully this time. "I mean, if you want to, of course."

"If I wan— oh God, yes! Of course! But... When?"

"We don't have a date yet," Nick answered because Claire was way too excited that she couldn't do anything other than smile, hold London's hands and struggle not to jump up and down. "We'll wait for you to return..."

"Aw guys... That's... That's too much. I don't even know what to say."

"Say nothing and just get your ass back here," Nick said. "You're an important and huge part of both out lives."

"Thank you. And congratulations!"

"Congratulations," Steve said, shaking hands with Nick and then hugging Claire.

Claire and Nick needed to go back to the hospital so, with one last hug, a few more last words and some tears shed by Claire, they left.

"Can you believe that?" London asked, still baffled when Claire and Nick were out of sigh. "Wow... I must say, I did not see that coming."

"Well, it is kind of sudden, but what I did not see coming was that comment... You and the neuro guy?"

London's eyes met Steve's and she saw curiosity written all over his face, but she could swear there was something else... Was he jealous?

"It was a long time ago. We were still in Med School…"

"Huh... How come you never told me?"

"I didn't think it was important," London shrugged. "I mean, we broke up... But I told you about him. When you asked if my brothers ran background check on my ex-boyfriends..."

"That was _him_?"

"Well, yeah..." Steve was now staring into London's eyes and she was starting to feel a bit uncomfortable... "Don't do that."

"I'm not doing anything," he replied in a very neutral tone that made London roll her eyes.

"Oh, for God's sake, Steven. He's getting married!"

"Well, now I'm very thrilled about the news," he said with a mischievous smile and London knew he was just screwing with her. She smiled and slid her arms around his waist. "You know, even though they didn't invite me to the wedding..."

"You're jealous," London said quite cheerfully and placed a soft kiss on his lips. "That's cute."

"I'm not jealous," Steve retorted, tightening the embrace. "I'm just protecting what's important to me."

London's smile grew bigger and bigger and she felt like, if she died right now, she'd die happy.

"Don't worry. I'll take you to it anyways."

They were lost in each other's arms when Danny — finally — got there. And he wasn't alone.

"Auntie London!"

London instantly let go of Steve, dropped to her knees and opened her arms just in time to hold Grace, who was sprinting towards her.

"Hey, kiddo." She stood up again, with the nine year old girl in her arms. "Oh, look at that. You're wearing the tiara again!"

"Danno said you're leaving..."

"Well, I'm not leaving. I'll just... be away for a while."

"But why?"

London felt a lump in her throat and her knots in her stomach with Grace's straightforward question. She also could feel Danny, Chin and Kono watching her attentively.

Steve notice all those things as well, especially London's reaction. He noticed that she blinked a few times and inhaled deeply, like she was trying to think of a way to answer that question. He stood by her side and jumped in.

"Gracie, you know that Auntie London is a doctor, right?"

London looked at Steve, her eyes screaming thank you. He smiled at her and placed his hand on the small of her back.

"Yeah..."

"So, she's doing this to help other people. People who are away from home... Do you remember how she helped Danno?"

Grace nodded.

"That's what she's gonna do."

"When will you come back?"

London inhaled deeply. "I... I don't know that yet, Gracie."

Steve could see London's turmoil almost reaching its limit. He had seen something like that when they had to say goodbye and he knew she was putting up one hell of a fight to not show weakness.

"Hey, Grace, why don't we go grab something to eat. I haven't had breakfast yet, how about you?"

"Not yet."

"Okay then," Steve said, taking Grace from London's arms and putting her down. "We'll be back in a minute," he added before walking away, with Grace holding onto his hand.

"Well, that was harder than I was expecting," London admitted when Steve and Grace were considerably far to be heard. Then, she turned to face the rest of the group that came to the airport.

"So, it's true," Kono said after a few seconds in which no one had said anything. "About your deployment."

"Yes," London said heartbroken. "I'm afraid it is."

"Why you didn't say anything yesterday?"

"I didn't want to ruin the day... and I didn't really wanted to keep thinking about it, let alone talk about it. I'm sorry."

"Would you really go away without saying goodbye?" Danny asked and London felt his words were a bit icy.

"I didn't want to bother anyone and make you guys feel obligated to come over here..."

"It wouldn't be a bother," Chin said softly. "And we didn't come here out of obligation."

London felt her blood running to her cheeks.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't worry. It's okay."

London smiled when the three Five-0s smiled at her. It wasn't exactly a very cheerful smile, but more like a content one. The whole situation was delicate and a bit emotional to London so they managed to keep it less stressful as it was possible.

"I would ask how you guys know but I'm pretty sure it's a stupid question..."

"It sort of is, yeah," Kono said simply, making London chuckle softly.

"Right," London whispered when her chuckle faded to a small smile. "Thank you. For willingly coming here... It means a lot."

"Don't mention it," Danny said. "Just come back as soon as you can and in one piece. Otherwise Steve will be impossible to deal with."

Once again, London found herself laughing. She didn't know how it was possible but she was very thankful for those three being there. Right now, she realized that, if she dared to leave without speaking to them, she would be miserable. They were all just too great, and London would miss them all dearly.

"I'll try my best to spare you guys from all the suffering."

"Good. Now, seriously, take care— better yet, take _extra_ care once you get there, okay? And I'm not just saying," Danny said, this time more seriously.

"Yeah," Kono agreed. "Try to be safe."

"We all want to see you back here," Chin finished, voicing everyone's thoughts.

London looked at Steve's co-workers — no, scratch that — Steve's friends, his _ohana_; she felt genuine concern in their words and it made her think that, if she came to Hawaii with only a couple of friends, she was temporary leaving it with, at least, four more.

"Thank you, everyone. For everything. And I promise I'll do my best... I'll be fine."

She had to blink a couple of times because her view was starting to get blurry and she did not want to cry. She did not. But, when Kono closed the space between them, closing her arms around her and whispering "good luck", she couldn't keep the act. A tear fell. And when Chin took Kono's place and hugged her, a second tear fell and when Danny reached her, thanking London for all the things she did for him and for being kind to Grace, London was crying; because she didn't want to walk away from them. From any of them.

"You guys are amazing," she said while trying to make the tears stop. "Really. I'm gonna miss you all so much."

"We'll miss you too," said Kono, while brushing a tear away.

Despite her own river of tears, London laughed when she saw the young Asian shed a tear. Kono joined her shortly and, soon enough and without any reason whatsoever, the group of four were laughing.

"What's so funny?"

They all turned to face Steve and Grace that had returned; each one with a paper bag. But Steve noticed the redness in London's eyes and that her navy blue dress shirt had darker spots that he knew it was from tears.

Steve had let go of Grace's hand, who had ran to Danny and handed him the paper bag with donuts, and held London close.

"What happened?" he asked concerned, whispering in her ear.

"Nothing," London said brushing the last tear that fell. "We were just talking, that's all."

Steve didn't quite believe London but he kissed the side of her head and chose to let it pass. For now.

They all chatted for less than five minutes, until London and Steve's flight was called.

"That's our flight," London said softly and silence fell upon them.

No one knew what to say or how to say anything and not make it sound like goodbye, permanent goodbye. It was hard.

"I'm gonna miss you, Auntie London."

After a few seconds filled by quietness, Grace Williams was the one to break it, holding onto London's waist.

London wasn't expecting such thing and it make her heart sank.

"Oh... I'm gonna miss you too, sweetheart," she knelt down and kissed Grace on the cheeks.

"Will you be okay?" Grace asked, brushing a strand of London's hair behind her ear.

"I will. I will be just fine."

"Promise?"

"Pinky promise."

It was one hell of a promise London was making and regarding such complicated matter, but she made it anyways. And she did not intend to not keep it.

Grace then hugged London once again before pulling away, with red eyes. It opened a wound in London's heart.

"Alright, come here," Danny said. London stood up and was soon greeted by Danny's open arms that closed around her body. "Come back safe, okay?"

London just muttered a very weak yes. At this point, she didn't trust her voice at all. By the time she hugged the last one — Kono Kalakaua — she was trying to hold back sobs.

"Thank you, everyone," London said, holding onto Steve who was standing by her side like a rock. "I really appreciate you all coming here today. Thank you so much."

"No problem," Danny said, just when the voice announced again that their flight.

London took a deep breath and let go of Steve so he could say his goodbyes as well.

"I'll see you guys soon," he said moments after he and London walked through the security gates.

They heard Danny, Grace, Chin and Kono saying goodbye and London turned to wave one last time. She felt awful sad for leaving, and this wasn't the last time she'd have to go through that. Tomorrow she'd have to go through that all over again.

London tried to wave those thoughts away and focused on the man beside her. She was deeply glad that Steve was there, that he'd be with her during that thirteen hours flight. He was her safe heaven and she held onto him like her life depended on it.

. . .


	32. Chapter 32

_Oh hey guys! Thanks to everyone who's reading this and thanks a lot to those who reviewed my last chapter! I got six reviews - that was awesome xD You guys are awesome. And to those who are hoping that London will be discharged... well, this story isn't exactly close the end yet, so..._

_Anyways, hope you guys enjoy!_

* * *

><p>It was already 2am, North Carolina time, when London and Steve got to Fort Bragg.<p>

Even though it was pretty late, neither London nor Steve were sleepy. They had had some sleep during the flight and were still operating on Hawaii time, so they stayed awake and, for the most part, they stayed in bed, after all, the weather in North Carolina couldn't be more different than Hawaii and it was winter.

"You wish you were in Hawaii right now, don't you?" London asked while resting her head on Steve's chest. He locked his arms across her chest, bringing her even closer to him.

The window was closed but they could see the sky through the glass. There were no stars. It was a dark cold winter night. Just peachy...

"Honestly? I wish we both were there," he said kissing the side of her head as London ran her fingertips all over his arms.

She smiled sadly. She wished that too...

"Why were you crying?" Steve asked, pushing a strand of hair away behind her ear. "You know, back there, in Hawaii, while Grace and I were away..."

London took a deep breath and her smile faded almost immediately. She knew Steve's intentions were the best, but she didn't like to keep thinking about those she was about to leave.

"I wasn't ready for that," she said after a handful of seconds. "It was hard... still is..."

The hints of sadness in London's voice spoke volumes to Steve and he felt bad, he felt downright angry — bad for bringing it back, and angry because she was leaving; but he didn't blame it on her. What good would that make? Steve was just mad. Ultimately, he just felt protective towards her. He wanted to shield her from all of that; he didn't want her to suffer, ever again. Irrational, probably, but he wanted her that much. He cared about her that much. And that would never change.

"I'm sorry..." Steve whispered in her ear; he rested his chin on her shoulder and tightened the embrace.

"Don't worry... I'll be fine. It's just... This time, things happened way too different. I left Hawaii with so much more than I expected to have when I returned," she admitted snuggling up to Steve's body. "Not to mention last time... I'll just miss them all so badly..."

"If it helps, they'll miss you too... Especially Gracie."

"God, my heart was torn to shreds when I saw her and when I had to say goodbye to her... She's just so adorable; I can't even put down in words how miserable I felt..."

"She is, isn't she? Can't believe she's Danno's daughter."

Steve's attempt to make London smile worked flawlessly. He felt her body shaking as she laughed softly. He'd miss that sound...

"You are so mean," she said, turning to face Steve. "Danny is a nice person."

"Sure he is. I bet that when he's sleeping and not talking, not ranting, not annoying people to death he's a nice guy."

"You know what? I think you like him. Probably more than you like me."

"Okay, crazy. Where did that come from?"

"Pure kindergarten psychology. If you complain a lot about someone, then there are definitely some hidden feelings going on."

Steve cocked an eyebrow while looking at London.

"That is stupid."

"That, m'darling, is the ugly tru— AH!"

London yelped quite loudly when Steve wrapped his arms around her waist and flipped her over on the bed so she had her back pressed against the cold mattress and he was on top of her. She could hardly move because of his body and the access of giggles she was having.

"Take that back," he said rather serious, making London giggle even more.

"No! I'm right!"

"Take it back," he said, his fingers trailing its way to her ribs.

"Don't even think about it," she said when she realized what his plan was.

"Do as I say."

"Never."

"Then I have no other choice."

London half yelped, half laughed when Steve started tickling her. Even though she went fairly well through the whole training in the Army, she would never be able to overpower Steve, not when he had that much advantage.

"Alright. Alright! Stop! STOP! Please... Just..." London had tears in her eyes when Steve finally stopped. "Let me breathe..."

"So...?" he asked, brushing the tears away.

"So... what?" she asked back when her breathing was sort of under control.

"Take that nonsense back!"

"Why would I do that?" London asked, reaching for Steve's hands to not let him tickle her again. "For all that I know, you might like him more... I mean, affection is not something you can measure, like milk or how tall a building is an—"

Steve rolled his eyes and then silenced London with his lips. His lips found hers and instantly, she stopped talking and returned the kiss. Steve felt it when London shivered when he ran the tip of his tongue along her bottom lip shortly before biting on it gently. She couldn't hold back a moan and he grinned — inwardly and outwardly.

"Would you take it back now?" he asked seductively, making London smirk in response.

"Not quite," she replied huskily.

"What do I need to do to prove to you that you are so wrong?"

"Work your Naval Intelligence skills, darling... I'm pretty sure you'll figure it out."

Steve smiled his best charming smile. Irresistible. Then, he entangled his fingers with London's as he dove in for a passionate, loving, searing kiss — he was just getting started.

* * *

><p>When it was 5:30am, the alarm clock on her bedside table went off and London had to struggle to get out of bed and forced herself to get to the bathroom. About twenty minutes later, she was ready.<p>

When London looked at herself in the mirror, she felt like the onslaught wave of emotions hit her. Hard.

She was proud to wear the uniform, but the sadness that she felt was also there. It would be one hell of a tough day. A lot worse than her last deployment...

Steve walked out of the bathroom and was also taken aback by the view. He had never seen London wearing her uniform and, now that he saw it, that was something else. Reality was barging through the doors. It was all real. All way too real.

"Hey," he whispered, not being able to speak any louder at the moment.

London turned slowly to look at Steve.

"I- uh... I'm ready." Her voice was just as loud as Steve's.

"Alright." That was all he could mutter and only after a few seconds.

Steve had to force the air down his lungs. Suddenly, breathing was a hard thing to do, and they still have about thirty minutes left. It would be one tough journey...

—

"Dad..."

"Hey, sweetheart."

London let go of Steve's hand and walked towards her father, who was smiling at her.

"So good to see you, sir."

"Oh, forget formalities. Right now, I am no sir. I'm just your father..."

London let out a soft chuckle as her father pulled her for a hug.

There were a few other families around them and, even though she recognized everyone from her unit, London's attention was totally concentrated on the three men that were standing close to her.

"I don't know how you did it, but I'm happy that you're here again, dad."

"I would like it better if I was here for a different reason, but nothing in this world would keep me from being here with you, darling."

London loosened the hug with a ghost of a smile on her face. It wasn't the happiest situation but she wouldn't let it show. She was a real and pretty tough Alexander after all.

"Well, look at the bright side, dad," Hunter said perkily, placing one hand on his father's shoulder. "At least you get to meet London's Navy SEAL boyfriend."

London eyed Hunter, but he didn't seem to acknowledge that.

"Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett, right?" With one arm around his daughter's shoulder, Mr. Alexander took one step towards Steve, offering him his free hand. Apparently, he missed Hunter's teasing too. "I heard a lot about you over the past few years, sailor."

London shifted her eyes to the ground; for some reason, she was blushing.

"I heard a lot about you too, sir," Steve said shaking the man's hand. "And, please, call me Steve."

Hunter also took a step forward and reached his hand out.

"I'm Hunter, and it's nice finally meeting you personally. It was getting weird to do all those researches on you."

London raised her head at the same moment she slapped Hunter's arm. Then she turned to look at Steve with apologetic eyes. He just waved that off with a small smile.

"It's okay," he told London softly. "I was warned, right?" London just smiled back at him. "Nice meeting you too," he added shaking Hunter's hand.

If those were normal circumstances, Steve would find slightly awkward to meet London's father — Major General Matthew Alexander — and her now only brother — Major Hunter Nakamura-Alexander. But those weren't normal circumstances, and it didn't have any room for awkwardness.

With every second that passed, London started to feel more and more nervous. Not only London but, everyone else. She felt her father's hand tightening the grip on her upper arm, noticed Hunter holding tightly onto his cane and she could see in Steve's eyes he wasn't looking forward to the inevitable moment. No one was.

"Hey, guys, could you do me a favor?" she asked looking at all three men. "Could at least one of you look at me like you're going to see me again?"

Silence fell upon them for about three seconds. It was understandable their nervousness, after all, the memories of the last time an Alexander went to Afghanistan wasn't exactly cheerful. On the other hand...

But that eerie silence was broken by Hunter as he approached London with open arms.

"Come here, kid."

London frowned playfully. She strongly disliked it when he called her kid but, right now, she'd give him a free pass out of it and willingly allow him to close his arms around her upper body.

"Stop talking nonsense, okay?" he said when London hugged him back. "You're coming back, do you hear me?"

"Yes, sir."

"London."

"Don't worry, Hunt."

"It is impossible not to worry when my little sister is on her way to Afghanistan."

London let go of Hunter and looked deep in his eyes; she held her breath at the sigh. He seemed even more worried than when she went to Iraq. No wonder though. She was told about her new mission and had to deal with it in less than 72 hours. Sure Hunter did the same many times before - and, sometimes, in less than 72 hours - but he wasn't used to how sudden that felt when he wasn't the one leaving.

"I'm not that little... and I've been through this before, remember?"

Of course Hunter remembered. Just like he remembered he always told those exact same words to London when she was younger and told him to be careful. It was his time now.

"It's not the same," he said, not able to hide his concern.

"I know," London said framing his face with only her right hand. "It never is, right?"

Hunter didn't say anything.

"We'll be alright. I have the best team with me," she said kissing his cheeks softly.

"Take care."

"Will do."

With one reassuring smile — as reassuring as she could make it look like —, London let go of Hunter and checked her watch. Less than ten minutes left. Then she turned to look at Steve; London felt like someone had cut her chest open with a blind blade. It hurt.

"Hi sailor," she said, choosing to ignore the lump in her throat.

"Hey beautiful..."

Steve took her both hand in his and noticed that they were a bit colder than he remembered, just like his. Maybe it was the cold weather, or maybe — in his case — it was because of something else entirely different... The sneak preview of what was to come. The inherent absence of someone who was just as important to him; she was probably the reason that kept him going while he was away. His particular sun. The center of his universe. And now that she'd be gone, it would be one cold universe...

"Steve...?" London's voice brought him back from his wandering and, with a blink, Steve found himself looking into the most appealing dark eyes ever. It was like she was staring into the depths of his soul; he felt his heart skipping a beat. "Are you there?"

"Yeah," he replied quickly. If he was going to start daydreaming, then he'd do it some other time. Not now. Not while he still had London. "Yes, I'm here..."

She squinted almost quizzically. "Are you okay? What happened to the tough, focused, dead serious SEAL I met a while ago?"

"Don't know... Probably is lost somewhere, trying to figure things out."

London tilted her head a little bit to the left and looked at him, curiosity showing in her eyes.

"Never in my life I imagined I'd go through this one day, London," he admitted after a couple of seconds. "It's... I don't..."

London released the hold on Steve's left hand so she could use her right hand to touch his face as her thumb brushed softly his cheek. He felt so warm beneath her touch...

"It's okay."

Steve heard her calm and soft voice saying those words and he smiled. He wasn't happy but, for some unknown reason, he smiled.

"God, this is crazy..." He looked at London and noticed she was smiling back at him, and her smile matched his — a sad smile. "This is crazy, London! I feel like... like I'm one of those Army wives, you know? When they come to say goodbye to their husbands, sons, all her loved ones because they're going to fight for the country and... I'm ranting, aren't I? Great. Now I'm turning into Danny... See? This is so crazy..."

Steve rubbed his face. This should be one of the hardest things he'd ever done... When he looked back at London, after about three seconds, he saw himself facing a mute woman.

London didn't say a word about Steve's "Danny" moment. She didn't have anything to say because she knew how he felt. Literally, she wasn't an Army wife in a way that she wasn't married to any Army Officer; but she was an Officer now, and the Army was always a constant presence in her life that it was almost like she was somehow married to it. She had said goodbyes so many times to her loved ones and she even buried people who lost their lives for the country. She knew exactly how that felt, how hard it was, how painful it could be. So, instead of saying anything, London slid her hands to the back of his neck, took one step forward, pressing her body against his and then, their lips met.

They stood still for a moment, until Steve locked his arms around her waist, pulled her even closer to him and parted his lips, seeking for the sinful taste of London's kiss.

It was like they weren't next to that huge plane that would take London to Afghanistan in less than ten minutes. It was like London's father and brother weren't there — they didn't register when Hunter, or maybe it was her Dad, cleared its throat somewhere around them. It was like time and space had disappeared, leaving the eternity to them.

London held onto Steve like he was the only thing keeping her wherever she was, like he was her gravity. And, in some ways, he was. He was the reason of her everything. She never thought she'd have it, but he was the one. And the thought of having found it and walking away from it sent a shiver down her spine and London pulled apart.

She rested her forehead against Steve's while grasping for air. London also tried to shut her thoughts off — they were slowly getting out of control.

So were Steve's. The simple thought of seeing London getting on that plane and leaving to Afghanistan was driving him crazy. He didn't want to lose her. He loved her. And he had never told her...

"London?" Steve called her name softly. His hands resting on the small of her back.

"Yes?"

"I lov—"

"Don't!"

London's finger reached Steve's lips in no time and she silenced him before he could finish his sentence. His mind went numb for a while as he looked in her eyes. They were dark and deep.

"I'm sorry," she said letting her hand slid from his lips and land on his chest. "But don't. Not now."

London could see an enormous mix of feelings and emotions in Steve's eyes. Amongst those she could name were disappointment, astonishment, bewilderment and, she prayed to God she was wrong, but she thought she saw hurt. And she hated herself for hurting him. She didn't mean to.

"Don't get me wrong, babe," London said cupping his face with her both hands. She still could see the turmoil in his eyes. "I do know what you want to say and, trust me, I feel just the same. I really do. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. Ever. But... even though I want to scream those three words at the top of my lungs right now, I can't. And I can't handle you saying that either... because it feels like goodbye — permanent goodbye... and I really can't handle that. Not right now." Her eyes dropped to the ground. "I'm sorry..."

Did Steve felt hurt when London silenced him? Yes. But now he understood how she felt and that sort of made sense. Sort of. He still wanted her to know how much he loved her but he agreed — only in part — that it did sound like goodbye. But, what if this was the last time they ever saw each other? They wouldn't have said it... What the hell was he thinking? That was not their last goodbye. And he realized couldn't handle permanent goodbyes either.

Steve tipped her head up so he could look into her eyes once again.

"You are the best thing that ever happened to me as well, London..."

The most beautiful smile appeared on London's face, just to be wiped off seconds later when someone said it was time to board.

London's eyes met Steve's and she had to bit on her lower lip when she noticed hints of sadness. If only he knew how torn she was on the inside...

"I'll go, and I'll be back. And then we'll continue from here, okay?"

"Deal."

Steve pulled London for a hug and she kissed him one last time. If she was asked right now, she'd say she didn't want to go, but that wasn't a choice she could make.

"I hope you all behave while I'm out," London said to everyone when she let go of Steve.

"See you soon, kid," Hunter said with one last hug. Then, it was her father's turn.

"Take care, darling. And please, be safe, alright?"

"Yes, Dad."

London grabbed her duffel bag from the ground; she felt like it was three times heavier.

"London, wait." She looked instantly at Steve, who was trying to get something that was around his neck. She recognized what it was before he took it off.

"No," London said, placing one hand on where she thought her ring was. She felt it beneath his T-shirt. "Keep it. I don't want to lose it while I'm there... And I don't want you to forget me."

"That would be impossible," Steve replied, taking her hand in his and squeezing it softly.

London felt like her heart would break her ribs, how strong it was beating. She even felt a bit lightheaded.

With one last smile, she forced herself to let go of Steve's hand. London felt physical pain when she did that, but she didn't have other choice — not now.

"Gentlemen."

Somehow, London managed to speak, even though there was a huge lump in her throat. Slowly, she brought her right hand up, palm down, until her forefinger was almost touching her right temple. Three men repeated the salute, all at the same time and London opened one last smile before turning her back to them and walking to the airplane. She had to fight the tears that were threatening to fall.

Before vanishing on the inside of the aircraft, she stopped, looked back and waved. The image of her father, her brother and the man she loved, standing side by side, was burned in her memory, and it would follow her throughout the long journey she had ahead.

* * *

><p>It was unreal.<p>

Being at Fort Bragg, having to say goodbye to London, watching her step on an airplane that would take her to a hostile war zone along with her brother and father. It was all too unreal. Never in his life, Steven J. McGarrett imagined going through this — to stand on the sideline.

"It's pretty crappy, isn't it?" Steve turned to face Hunter, who was standing by his right side. "Saying goodbye and being the one left behind..."

"Yeah," Steve agreed, while watching as the pilot was lining the plane so it could take off as soon as he had approval. "It is pretty crappy."

"Wish I could say it gets better but it really doesn't," said London's father. Steve looked at him but he had his eyes fixed on the runway, where the plane was moving again. "Not until she gets back..."

Silence settled in that place. Not only Steve and the Alexander's went quiet, but every single person of all families that had come there to say goodbye. No one said a word for almost a minute when the plane disappeared on the sky. Then, the silence was broken by the sound of feet, walking towards the exit.

"It was very thoughtful of you to come here today, Steve."

"I couldn't not be here, sir."

He waved. "Forget the _'sir'_. It's Matthew," London's father said. "And it is nice meeting you, son."

. . .


	33. Chapter 33

_Hi! Thank you everyone who's reading and I have two things to say:_

_- Firstly, I'm not entirely pleased with this chapter but then again, I couldn't make it better. I tried so very hard but my bran didn't want to work with me so... I am so terribly sorry.  
><em>

_- Secondly, I'm also so, so very sorry for he huge amount of OOCness (I find that all my characters are Out Of Character ._.')... _ _There's something really wrong with me while I was writing this chapter. Dunno what was it though. I'll try to make it up to you on the next chapter.__  
><em>

_Anyways, I still hope you enjoy and let me know what you think of it thus far. Your thoughts might help me so, please? Thanks!  
><em>

* * *

><p>Going back to London's place in Fort Bragg and then returning to Hawaii proved to be a hard thing to do.<p>

When he stepped inside her home, everything screamed London. The décor, the photos, her perfume all over the place... Then, later that day, when he went to the Raleigh-Durham Airport, he could still remember when he and London got there, just the other day.

_Hang in there, Steven._ If Hunter could handle seeing his sister being deployed. If Matthew could deal with his younger daughter going to the same place his son went and didn't return. If London could handle that sudden separation, then Steve could deal with this as well. _She'll be okay._

Steve mentally repeated those last words more than just a couple of times. Everything was still so fresh. One minute they were together and the next... Now, Steve was to face thirteen hours of flight to return to his house, which was their house for over a month... but he was going back alone.

_She'll be just fine..._

.

It was 10pm, still Monday, when Steve's flight landed in Hawaii.

He didn't call Danny to pick him at the Airport. Nor Chin for that matter. Instead, he took a cab and, even though the driver tried to start a conversation, it was all neutral stuff such as the weather — it was raining a lot that night — or the latest news about some football team. That kind of conversation he could handle. Superficial. Shallow. Perfect.

Steve thanked the driver, paid and gave him a nice tip, but he didn't enter the house right away. Even though it was pouring rain, he walked around it and went straight to the beach, only stopping to drop his bag on the lanai. Then, Steve let his body fall on one of the chairs next to the ocean.

He was exhausted, had one goddamned migraine and alone. Now usually, Steve would just suck it up and live with it. But, right now, he couldn't. So he just sat there, watching at the raindrops falling, the waves crashing and his thoughts drifting back to every single moment that he shared with London...

Steve stood there for around ten to fifteen minutes until he finally went to his house. He was sad, yes, but it wasn't like he had lost London for good. She wasn't dead; she just went to Afghanistan. She was alright; he needed to be alright as well. For London. So, he took a shower, changed into his pajama pants and tried to get some sleep, after all, he was the head of the Five-0, he'd have work to do in the morning.

* * *

><p>It surprised Danny when he saw the familiar dark blue Chevy Silverado parked next to the Five-0 headquarters' building. He didn't know Steve had already returned.<p>

He was still standing by his Camaro when he heard Chin Ho's bike engine roaring then not anymore when he pulled into the parking space.

"Did you know that?" Danny asked Chin almost immediately. The older man looked at the truck that he had already seen.

"Not until now..."

Danny shook his head. It would be one of those days; he thought to himself but didn't voice it. It wasn't necessary. When he looked at Chin, he could tell he had thought just the same.

.

For pretty obvious reasons, no one asked if Steve was okay. It was crystal clear that he wasn't and none of them wanted to add any more stress to him.

So they decided to just let things go... Even when he jumped from an overpass, landed on the back of a truck that was at approximately 45 miles per hour, only to get to a suspect that would be forced to stop only a few yards ahead, where the HPD had blocked the street.

Danny didn't say a word while he drove all the way back to HQ that night since Steve was slightly bruised after his "mission impossible" stunt.

"You know what, this is even worse than what I had in mind. Just... Go ahead." Steve couldn't handle the silence anymore so, when he was climbing up the stairs, towards the Five-0 Task Force Headquarters, he just blurted out.

"Beg your pardon?" Danny asked while glancing at Steve with only the corner of his eyes.

"You've been awful quiet the whole day and that, my friend, is not you so go ahead. Ask."

"I have nothing to ask," Danny said while opening one side of the double glass doors that allowed them in to the war room.

"Then say whatever you have to say, just... get it over with."

Danny Williams stopped and looked at Steve. The dark haired man appeared to be distraught but Danny knew that it wasn't because of his "awful quietness".

"All I have to say, you already know."

Steve sighed and paced — his left hand holding his right side; his ribs were pretty sore but he didn't mind the pain that much.

"I know... It's just—"

"You're new to this. And, if you don't mind my saying, this is pretty crappy."

"Yeah. Pretty crappy..."

Steve's response surprised Danny. He didn't really thing he'd reply to that, let alone agree with him so nicely but there it was. London definitely worked some miracle.

"Wanna grab a beer?" the blonde offered. "It's on me."

Steve thought about that for a second. He could use a beer. Or two. And, despite everything, he really enjoyed Danny's company. He wasn't sure if he liked this odd version of Danny but still...

"Yeah, I just need to take my keys and—"

Steve had just opened the first drawer of his desk to retrieve the keys to his truck and London's necklace when his phone rang. He willingly ignored it for two seconds, while he grabbed the necklace, and then he pulled the phone out of his pocket.

"Hold on," he told Danny. It was an unknown number and he didn't recognize the large amount of digits but answered it anyways. "McGarrett."

_"Hi sailor."_

Steve found himself smiling broadly.

"London."

_"I see you still remember my name. That's nice." _He could tell she was smiling as well just by her tone. _"How are you doing? How was your flight?"_

"Alright. Nothing unusual. How was yours?"

_"Smooth. Except for the wild landing and some turbulence it all went well. We're breathing."_

"Yeah. Keep doing that."

_"Roger that, sir."_ They both chuckled a bit nervously though. _"So, did I wake you up? Interrupted something?"_

"No! No, of course not. I'm at work." Work. Steve suddenly remembered what he was up to before his phone rang. "We just ended a case. I'm with Danny," he added looking at his partner who was looking at him with a smile on his face.

_"Oh... Say hi to Danny for me. And tell him to kiss Gracie for me."_

Steve passed on the message. Danny said hi as well, promised he'd kiss Grace and told Steve they could have that beer some other time. His goal that night was to cheer Steve up a little bit, but London did a way better job for him.

Before he walked out of Steve's office, Danny glanced one last time at his partner. Steve had a small smile on his lips and all signs of stress had left and it made Danny smile. It would be a bit of a bumpy ride but, if more nights ended up like this one, then it would be okay... hopefully.

* * *

><p>Surprisingly enough, London managed to talk to her family and Steve in a quite regular basis — one to two times a week and that was quite an accomplish in London's opinion. She even spoke with Nick and Claire and with Chin Ho, Kono, Danny and Grace a couple of times — huge victory. So, February passed fairly quickly and so did March. Sure she missed everyone like crazy but that was something she needed to get used to for a while. London still didn't know when she'd return but she tried not to keep thinking about that when she was in Afghanistan for such short time.<p>

.

It was the first week of April and the 541st team was currently stationed in Oruzgan Province, Afghanistan. They were all gathered at the Forward Operating Base "Cobra", now known as Firebase Tinsley when the phone call came in.

It was around 3pm and London was having some late lunch with Travis and Storm - the first was an emergency nurse and the second a general surgeon she knew from past summers - when their pages went off. Less than a minute later, the whole unit was gathered and Colonel Wolcott, responsible for the medical facility told them about their next assignment.

"A hawk went down in Kajaki, Helmand, with seven officers on board." The Colonel had barely finished what he had to say and they were already planning. In Afghanistan, seven officers was a piece of cake, so they would send a smaller unit. Two surgeon, one combat medic and two critical care nurses. "Captain Alexander, you're taking Lieutenants Davis and Moore and 2nd Lieutenants Parker and Wesley." London looked at her team. Henry Moore was the other surgeon, Shane Davis was the combat doctor, and Ian Parker and Suzy Wesley were the critical care nurses. Great team. It would always be a great team because they worked perfectly fine together, all of them. "Chopper leaves in five and we'll update you from there. Get ready and good luck."

They all nodded and followed Colonel Wolcott out of the room. They needed to get their equipment that was on the prepping area (or so they called).

"All right guys, gear up. We've got work to do."

London wore the vest, grabbed her back pack that already had all her equipment, fastened the holster around her waist and thigh and the only things that were missing were the hat and rifle.

"Three minutes guy!"

London checked the clock on the wall. It was 3:36pm, meaning it would be one in the morning in Hawaii. She couldn't call. It's been almost a week since she last spoke with Steve. It would have to wait a little further... _Damn._

"Hey, Rick. Rick!" London had to scream so that Captain Richard Storm would hear it.

"Yes, dear?"

"I need you to do something for me," London said taking an envelope out of her pocket.

"No," he said when he realized what she was asking him to do. "No. London, I can't-"

"Yes, you can. And you will. I could hand it to Colonel Wolcott but you're staying... and you know my family. You worked with my brother. Please."

Rick hated the idea of holding London's "goodbye letter". Those goddamned letters were written by almost every soldier he knew and, in his opinion, could be the most terrifying thing in that place. Even worse than missiles and stuff like that because, when you have to handle one of those, it means the person who wrote it isn't coming back to hug you. It sucks. And Rick gave one of those to Major General Alexander when Nathan died. It was downright terrible.

"Please, Rick."

He looked at the woman in front of him, holding the letter. When he learned that London Alexander had joined the service, at the same time he was reassigned to Fort Bragg, never in his life he imagined he'd end up working with her in Afghanistan. What were the odds?

"Fine," he said finally, taking the envelope from her hands. He wasn't pleased with it though... "But you'll take it back as soon as you return. There is no way in hell I'll carry this thing with me longer than one day."

London smiled at him. "Let's hope you don't have to."

"No. Let's not hope. Make it happen!"

London kept the smile and nodded before heading towards the door. "Come on guys. We gotta get going!"

. . .


	34. Chapter 34

_Oy! Thank you very much everyone who's reading, has reviewed, alerted and favorited this story so far__. Here's another chapter and, please, let me know what you think in a review or PM. Hope you enjoy!_

_Oh, and on a side note, I didn't do much edit on this so... my apologies in advance in case you find something uber wrong.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"I can see the helicopter. We're almost there," the pilot announced when the tail of the helicopter appeared on the horizon.<p>

Instantly, the five members of the 541st Forward Surgical Team fastened the straps of the parachutes around their bodies, checked and double checked it.

London inhaled deeply a couple of times to push the anxiety away. It was always like this. It doesn't matter that she had jumped of a helicopter or even a small airplane more than just a few times before, whenever she had to do it, she felt a bit nervous, but she always considered that a good thing. It meant she respected and appreciated her life that much. Then, when she looked around, London could see they were all feeling almost the same. Anxiety mixed with excitement.

"Hey guys, you know what this reminds me?" she shouted to the other four people that were on the back of the hawk.

"No idea!" said Lieutenant Davis, who was right next to her. "What?"

"Have you seen Black Hawk Down?"

Everyone looked at her. Their expressions were as blank as a white board with no writings.

"With all due respect, Captain," shouted 2nd. Lieutenant Suzy Wesley. A blonde woman from California, in her late thirties that was the very opposite of what her roots could suggest. She was tough and strong woman that could kick the crap out of anyone who'd suggest she's just another Blondie that looked like Malibu Barbie. "Fuck you!"

London laughed. She and Suzy had been friends since she joined the Army. She was also stationed in Fort Bragg and they used to hang out a lot, so she didn't take that as an offense.

"Hey, that is one of my favorite movies!" London shouted in response while checking the area where they'd jump. For obvious reasons such as bad landing spots, they'd have to jump a few meters from where the hawk was and they were getting closer to it already. "But what I want you to have in mind is that we are the rescue squad. They're waiting for us. They need us. And I'm gonna quote my favorite movie and say _'it's what you do right now that makes a difference'_. We'll make a difference in those Officer's lives. All of them. Are we clear?"

London heard a chorus of _"Yes, Captain!"_ and she nodded. She was serious again. She was always very emphatic when it comes to this part. That was when she remembered Nathan and her mother, and she would always make sure that her team would treat them all like they were just as important as their loved ones, their parents, their brothers, sisters, their children... Because they were someone's loved one, someone's father, mother, sister, brother and child. And, right now, to those seven men out there, the five people in that chopper were their hope.

"Captain Alexander." London looked at the co-pilot, who had just called her. "This is the place."

She nodded.

"Alright guys! One at a time. Go."

One by one, London saw her, not only coworkers and colleagues but also friends jump out of the helicopter. She was the last one and, when she was ready to take the big dive, she heard the pilot's voice calling out for her.

"Good luck."

London smiled at the two men that were looking at her.

"Thank you. And stay tuned. We'll need a ride once our job is done here."

Now it was the pilot and co-pilot's turn to smile shortly before London jumped out of the helicopter. They instantly turned to fly back to the base and wait for when they'd have to get back there.

.

London landed smoothly and quickly worked on her parachute, shoving it back on its bag without actually folding it carefully — she didn't have time for that; she was a bit away from where the hawk had "landed".

When London finally joined the team, she quickly looked around and noticed that they were all busy.

Lieutenant Henry Moore, a surgeon, and 2nd Lieutenant Suzy Wesley, a critical care nurse, were working on what seemed to the most critical of all: the pilot. The man had deep cuts all over his torso and face, not to mention a part of the dash had almost tore his left leg from his body. Good thing Lieutenant Moore was an ortho surgeon.

Lieutenant Shane Davis, the combat doctor, was with a man who had his right leg twisted in an ugly and most definitely painful position and had a big wound on the left side of his abdomen. When she looked around him, she saw a piece of the fuselage soaked in blood. London felt a shiver down her spine when she realized she'd seen that so many times that it barely affected her.

"Captain!" The other critical care nurse, 2nd Lieutenant Ian Parker, called for London but she was already sprinting towards him. She saw that he was with what seemed to be the worst in condition out of the five remaining Officers. "He's on and off."

London cursed loudly when she heard that. According to Parker, the man was losing and gaining consciousness and that was something she dreaded. If it was something with his head, she could do very little over there.

"He fell."

London's looked up and found one of the Officers right in front of her, next to Parker. He was holding his left arm and she could see where the sleeve was torn and the blood that was leaving his body. Not alarming, but she needed to stitch that.

"What?"

"Before the chopper hit the ground, he fell," the man explained. London recognized the uniform as not Army, but Navy instead. "Actually, he was thrown out of it when the pilot tried to keep the hawk steady."

"How the hell it went down?" London asked while checking his pulse while opening her bag and pulling a needle out of it. Sedative.

"Enemy chopper. We opened fire against it but they had a rocket launcher." London knew what was coming next. She hated it. "It hit the tail."

"Rank and name, Officer?"

"I'm Lieutenant Commander Chase Hawthorne; this is Lieutenant Commander Jonathan Eckhart. United States Navy."

That last bit she already knew, but she didn't like it that much that their rank were higher than hers. Hierarchy...

"Captain London Alexander," she replied absent mindedly while checking his eyes. Pupils were different. That was not good. "Damn..."

"What is it?"

London pulled the radio from her waist and tossed to her 2nd Lieutenant, who had seen the exact same thing that London saw.

"We need MedEvac. STAT."

"Captain, what is it?"

London heard it when the Navy Lieutenant Commander addressed her again but she couldn't answer him because she was looking for further injuries — so far she had a sprained wrist, broken ribs, a broken leg, a few bruises and cuts but, what was really bothering her was the fact that he had a depressed skull fracture. He was wearing protection but the impact was too strong and it caused it anyways. London's main concern was that his brain was swelling or he was bleeding internally but she couldn't even consider doing a decompressive craniectomy where she was. She needed an OR.

London was to answer Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne when something caught her attention. The patch they were wearing. She recognized it and was left breathless for a moment.

"They're on the way, Captain."

"Yeah... Okay."

Parker's voice brought her back and she soon started working on the injuries she could treat.

"Lieutenant Commander Eckhart has multiple fractures, all due to his fall," she finally explained what was happening to the Navy SEAL standing in front of her, staring at her with eagle eyes. "We need to get him out of here and into an OR as soon as possible." Then, she looked at Parker, who was finishing the tourniquet on the man's broken leg. It was an exposed fracture so he needed to stop the bleeding. "Keep an eye on him. As soon as the transport gets here, tell them to take him to Kandahar Airfield. I'll check the others. Hey Commander."

"Yes?"

"Come with me. I might need your help and I need to stitch that cut."

"It's okay, I'm fine."

"Sure you're fine," she said walking towards the aircraft. "For now..."

.

Of all the seven men, two didn't resist until the MedEvac got there. The co-pilot died instantly; a part of the dashboard entered his chest, cutting his heart in two. London felt like her own heart was aching for the dead Officer. The second was the pilot. Despite all efforts from Lieutenant Moore and 2nd Lieutenant Wesley, his body wasn't strong enough to resist the extensive injuries.

"I'm not gonna lose anyone else," she kept repeating herself while waiting for the air transport.

"Stay with me, Commander." The Lieutenant Commander Jonathan Eckhart was barely aware of the world around him but London was determined to keep him awake. If he drifted to sleep he could go into a coma and she didn't want that to happen so, whenever he threatened to close his eyes for longer than two seconds, she shook him. "Stay with me..."

Amongst the five survivors — so to speak — Jonathan Eckhart was the worst in condition of them all. London wanted to yell at Shane Davis for not going for him as soon as he got there but she didn't do that because the man he was fixing was also in bad shape and Parker didn't hesitate and went to help him as soon as he got there. He was the youngest of the team and this was his first deployment. In London's opinion, he was pretty good, maybe even outstanding.

"Captain?"

London looked away from her patient to the man that was standing right next to her. Now that part of the adrenaline was gone, she took a better look at the Lieutenant Commander/Navy SEAL, Chase Hawthorne. He was nothing like Steve — he was blonde, not so tanned, light brown hair with brown eyes — but had the same look in his eyes. Toughened by the trainings and everything that came with the military duties. But, even though they were different, he made her think of Steve and she missed him even more, but, at the same time, was immensely glad that he was nowhere near that place.

"Yes?" she replied quietly.

"Is he gonna be okay?"

London glanced at the man lying on the ground. To say that he was bad was one hell of an understatement. He needed surgery and needed it immediately. And his lack of complaints and everything was deeply bothering London. The man should be feeling an excruciating pain, yet he was awful silent. But he was still alive, he was still fighting, so, that was the one point where London had no idea what was going to happen.

"Honestly, I can't answer that question right now. Maybe after we get him out of here. Maybe."

Chase Hawthorne nodded. Surprisingly enough, hierarchy was not a problem. He was clearly the man in charge of that group of men and he understood that those five people of the rescue squad were the only chance that some of them had. Chase Hawthorne and a SEAL named Dexter Reed only had a few cuts and superficial bruises. The other weren't so lucky; a few broken bones that would take a while to heal, not to mention Eckhart's delicate situation.

London was just trying to keep Jonathan awake when she heard the sound of choppers and saw two air ambulances were approaching.

"Team, let's get ready to transfer everyone in to the aircrafts," London told everyone and then she turned to the Navy guy next to her. "Hawthorne, I'll need to get Eckhart on a stretcher and take him to the helicopter. I might use an extra pair of hands if you don't mind."

"You can bet I don't mind."

London smiled at him for a brief second. Shortly after, the two air ambulances had landed and two men, one from each aircraft, left with one stretcher each. London and Chase assisted the man to put Jonathan on one while Shane and Henry plus the man they didn't know by name, but that was also a nurse, helped the Navy guy that Shane helped, the one with the twisted right leg, that was also suspect of having his spine injured.

When they took them to the air ambulances, London found herself facing an issue. There was no way that it would fit five people plus one on a stretcher in those helicopters. Four, maybe. Five, no. She'd need to think very carefully.

"Alright, Parker and Moore, you're going on this one," London shouted so she could be heard over the noise of the engine and pads of the helicopter and pointed to the one that Jonathan Eckhart was already settled. "Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne, Lieutenant Reed and Lieutenant Donahue, you're going here too. Everyone else, get to the other helicopter! Let's go people, we need to get then to an OR!" Almost as quickly, they all followed her orders. "Pilot, I want you to take them to Kandahar Airfield. Kandahar Airfield, do you hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am."

London nodded. Then, she went back to the open door where Chase Hawthorne had just tried to step into the aircraft.

"It won't fit!"

"Yes it will! Hop on the stretcher. Eckhart is on sedatives and Kandahar isn't that far, so there won't be a problem!"

London willingly ignored Hawthorne' questioning eyes and instantly reached for her radio. It wasn't there.

"Ian! Ian!"

"Yes, Captain!"

"Send a radio to Firebase Tinsley. Tell them to send a bird!"

"What? Why?"

It wasn't only Parker who asked those questions. Moore and Hawthorne added to the chorus as well.

"I'm staying."

"The hell you will!"

"It won't fit! And even if it did, the weight will slow it down. Now, contact Firebase Tinsley with the radio and ask for a bird. I'll wait right here. And Lieutenants, this is an immediate order."

Despite their complaints, London gave thumbs up to the pilot and ran to the other air ambulance and told it to go. _Now._ Five seconds later, the two helicopters were inches away from the ground.

London held onto her rifle tightly and took more than a couple steps back. The sand that was flying was making her almost close her eyes and open as much distance from where they were as it was necessary.

_It was necessary_. She repeated those words a few times. London didn't like the idea of being stuck next to a hawk alone — sooner or later some enemy troops could find her and she didn't want to think what could happen to her — but, as a leader, she needed to think of her team. The people that were trusted to her. And that's what she was doing._ It was necessary._

London was just thinking about that when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She wasn't expecting that and, even though she had her eyes almost shut up until now, she was still highly alert. Within micro seconds, London reached for her rifle and was about to point it towards the person who had just touched when she realized who it was.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she asked exasperated when she saw Chase Hawthorne standing there with his equipment.

"Well, you're staying."

"Are you stupid? I told you to get on that freaking helicopter!"

"Ma'am, I'm a Navy SEAL, and our team motto is 'leave no man behind'."

London rolled his eyes. She had heard that oh so many times before.

"I'm not a man."

"That's not the point. The point is, no one gets left behind."

"And I thought I had my fair share of SEALs," London whispered in a soft tone. Truth was, she was really glad that she wasn't the only one there. "C'mon, let's find a safe place..."

* * *

><p>"Captain Storm."<p>

"Yes, sir."

"I just got a call from Kandahar," said Colonel Wolcott. "Captain Alexander's unit has taken four Officers that survived to Kandahar Airfield."

"Okay. Good..." Richard had been waiting for news from the five people of his team for almost an hour now, and that was unusual. "When are they coming back?"

Colonel Wolcott hesitated for a second, maybe less, but, for Captain Storm's trained eyes, that was a lot.

"What happened?"

"2nd Lieutenant Ian Parker tried to contact us via radio but the signals weren't good... Captain Alexander didn't go to Kandahar."

Richard Storm was suddenly dumbstruck.

"What? Why?"

"The two air ambulances wouldn't hold all of them; she stayed behind."

While Colonel was explaining, Storm was already getting ready. There was no way he'd leave a member of his team out there, especially when she was an Alexander, daughter of a Major General and sister of one of his friends who died in Afghanistan years ago. No. "How long?"

"Approximately twenty minutes ago."

"WHAT? Why no one reported it earlier?"

"They tried but communications weren't good."

"Is the chopper ready?"

"Will be in five."

Damn. That was a freaking nightmare...

"I'll talk to Colonel Becker."

.

Colonel Jasper Becker was a member of the 2nd Ranger Battalion, currently serving with the Charlie Company 2nd Battalion in Firebase Tinsley; he was also a close friend of Major General Matthew Alexander.

When Captain Richard Storm explained the situation to the Colonel, Becker promptly offered help. So, five minutes later, Captain Storm along with Colonel Becker and one of his men, Lieutenant John Sullivan, were boarding on the helicopter, heading towards the place where the hawk had crashed, looking for, not only London, but also a Lieutenant Commander/Navy SEAL that choose to stay behind with London. _At least she wasn't alone;_ that's what Richard and Jasper thought when they heard the news.

.

"Are you sure this is the place?" Captain Storm yelled at the pilot so he could hear his words. They had the same pilot that flew London's team to where the hawk crashed.

"Positive. This is where they jumped," the man pointed to an open field close to where the fuselage could be seen. But that was about it.

"Can't see them! Fly lower."

The pilot did as he said but still, they didn't have a visual on anyone. Colonel Becker meticulously scanned the whole area. Twice. Three times, but the view never changed. The place was desert. "We'll have to land."

"What?" the pilot asked, peeking over his shoulder.

"I said we'll have to land! We'll do a quick reconnaissance on the ground."

No one was against the Colonel's orders.

"Alright!" the pilot responded promptly and got ready to land. "We'll wait for you here," he told the three men. They just nodded before jumping out of the helicopter.

Captain Storm, Colonel Becker and Lieutenant Sullivan covered a perimeter of a little over a mile from where both aircrafts were before returning.

"Where are they?"

Richard looked at the pilot who had asked the question and was waiting; it took him a few seconds to say something.

"Give me the radio and patch me in with Firebase Tinsley."

The pilot — an experienced man that had been in Iraq and Afghanistan more than just a couple of times over the past four years — did as he was told and tossed Captain Richard Storm a radio. Sadly enough, he knew what was coming next.

_"This is Colonel Wolcott, Firebase Tinsley, over."_

"Sir, this is Storm. We have two MIA... Repeat, two MIA. Captain Alexander, United States Army, and Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne, United States Navy... Over."

. . .


	35. Chapter 35

_Hi people! Sorry about the late update but I've been sick and am probably going through a writer's block because I couldn't get my brain to work on this story, even though I have it all planned in my head... _

_I didn't do much edit on this chapter so forgive me if there are lots of mistakes, misspellings and stuff like that. Hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think!_

* * *

><p><strong>April 11, 2011<strong>

For what seemed to be the first time in forever, Danny found himself driving his own car. Danny was the driver; he was actually sitting behind the steering wheel of his own Camaro while Steve was the shotgun. Some would be quite glad to be able to drive their own car but not Danny, because he knew that there should be something really wrong going on to make the control freak Navy SEAL to not want to drive. And he was damn right.

When he glanced to his side, Danny caught a glimpse of Steve. Checking his phone. Again. Steve had been doing that for the past week. Now, Danny couldn't handle that anymore.

"Will you, please, stop doing it?"

"What?"

"Checking your phone every five seconds. Please, stop."

Steve glowered at Danny but didn't let go of his phone.

"Give it a rest, man. Seriously."

"It's been almost two weeks, Danny..."

"I know that. But you won't get anything by checking it every five seconds... Did you try calling, I don't know, her brother? Or her father?"

Finally, Steve put the phone down, letting it rest on his left leg. "I did... I called London's brother three days ago. He hadn't heard from her either, and apparently, neither her father."

"Well, then maybe she's somewhere where phones won't work..."

Steve didn't say anything. Ten days without a phone wasn't exactly the definition of bad news. He knew it was a very strong possibility but... Steven J. McGarrett wasn't a man to believe that dreams were messages or whatever, but he had nightmares. It wasn't often though, but usually, they always involved a coffin, the American flag and a big photo of US Army Captain London Alexander. He shook that thought aside.

"Yeah, maybe..."

Danny saw, with the corner of his eye, when Steve reached for his phone again. There would be no break in that unnerving pattern until he heard from London. But, whether it was because of the long period of silence or Steve's unusual behavior, truth was that Danny was starting to get slightly disturbed with the lack of news as well... Nothing like Steve but still.

* * *

><p><strong>April 21, 2011<strong>

Ten more days passed and Steve still didn't hear a word from London. Not him nor anyone else by the way. According to Danny, she didn't even reply Grace's last letter, and she had sent it over a month ago.

He tried to convince himself that, if something bad had happened, he would've been told, after all, bad news have wings. He tried very hard but, to be honest, it didn't go that well... So he focused on the one thing that could keep him busy. Work.

Once again, Danny watched as his partner almost drowned himself into work. He had seen Steve do that before and knew it wasn't alarming yet, but still, Danny was concerned. Especially after last Saturday.

Danny was at Steve's place for some steaks and beers when Steve tried to call London's brother — Hunter — but couldn't speak to him. Later, after some more calls, Steve learned that Hunter was deployed on a mission.

After that, the lack of information became too overwhelming and he noticed that Steve was working harder than the usual.

Danny thought about telling him to slow down but he knew how useful that would be — he'd have more success talking to a brick wall — so he didn't say anything, only kept an eye on Steve the whole time. An eye and an arm on him...

"ANSWER MY GODDAMNED QUESTION! Where is he, you _sonofabitch_? Where is Brian Nolan?"

"Hey! If you kill him, he won't answer any of our questions!" Danny scolded when Steve held a suspect against the wall, with his arm pressed against the man's neck. "Let go. Let. Go."

After a couple of seconds, Steve let the man fall back on his feet. He should be in his mid maybe late forties and was suspect of being an accomplice on a kidnapping of a twelve years old boy that happened over twenty-four hours ago.

That alone wasn't good, combined with an upset SEAL running the task force, Danny had to intervene — even though he despised their suspect so very much.

"I'm gonna ask once," Danny said as calm and neutral as he could be. "And if you don't answer me, we already have a nice place for you at the Halawa Correction and what do you think they do to sexual offenders?"

"I'm no—"

"Right, right, you're not a pervert. That's not how it'll sound over there... Anyways. Where is Brian Nolan?"

"I am no—"

"WHERE is Brian Nolan? You answer me that and we'll try to get you a separate cell."

Both Steve and Danny waited a few seconds but the guy was still not willing to cooperate.

"Alright then," Danny said as he and Steve turned their back to the man while heading towards the door. "Have fun over there and watch your back. Especially on the shower."

"WAIT!"

Steve and Danny exchanged a look that silently said "always work".

"He's in Maui! Hugo took him to Maui... But I'm not a pervert. He forced me to kidnap the child. He... He said he'd kill my daughter if I didn't help him. I'm not a sexual offender."

.

"Danny, call the police department in Maui. I'm gonna call Chin. We need to get there."

They had left the Interrogation Room and heading back to their offices. Steve was busy with his phone and he barely noticed when Danny stopped; that fact only came to his knowledge when he bumped on Danny's hand that was stretched out in front of him.

"Danny! What the hell? I'm tryi—"

"Are you waiting for someone from... the Navy?"

Steve frowned but, when he followed Danny's eyes, he felt his heart sinking.

"He is not from the Navy... He's from the Army."

"Wait. What?"

"He's London's father," he said while resuming walking. "Call Chin," he told Danny. "Tell him to go to Maui. I need to..."

Steve quickly reached the man in uniform that was standing next to the smart table. His legs took him there but he was only half aware of the situation.

When Danny pointed the man, Steve's brain instantly stopped working on the case — it wasn't exactly the definition of professionalism but given the circumstances, he was trying to understand why that man had flew all the way to Hawaii...

"Major General?" Steve called the man carefully. He had no idea what on Earth Major General Matthew Alexander was doing there; actually, he had thought of a couple of things, but since neither were pleasant, he just choose to ignore it.

"Steve," he greeted, reaching out a hand to Steve. "How are you doing, son?"

Steve looked at Matthew Alexander and then his eyes searched the room until he found Danny's. The blonde detective was standing close enough to hear Steve and Matt and the Five-0 leader notice his oceanic blue eyes looking at him intently.

"Uh... I'm— I'm alright... How about you, sir?"

Matthew shook his head neutrally and that was his answer to Steve's question. No answer. "What did I tell you about the sir?"

"Right. I'm sorry... Matthew." Steve said shifting on the same place. A little detail that didn't go unnoticed to the Major General.

"Is this a bad time?" Matthew asked looking at Steve and then at Danny, who was standing close enough but was on the phone. "I can get back later if I'm interrupting something..."

"No," Steve said quickly. "No. We're just finishing a case..." They weren't exactly _just finishing a case_, but nothing that Chin and Kono couldn't handle. He would go crazy if he didn't get to talk to London's father. The thoughts that would certainly flood his mind would be too much for him to bear after almost a month without hearing from London.

"Good... good... Can I have a word with you, son?"

Steve felt a lump in his throat when Matthew asked that question. It sounded strange to his ears and it raised a yellow flag on his radar.

His eyes met Danny's and the blonde detective showed him the phone and nodded; then, he pointed to his office. Steve understood that as his silent way of saying "I spoke to Chin, he's on it and I'll be right there, just in case". Steve nodded in response.

"Of course," Steve said, looking at Matthew and showing him his office. "Please."

.

Steve had just closed the door when Matthew's voice greeted his ears. It sound more ominous than he was willing to admit.

"My apologies for coming here without being announced or calling..."

"Please. That is not a problem," Steve said gently interrupting his apologies. It was really okay — at least until the point where it was possible. "Have a seat."

"Thank you," he said but didn't sit.

Steve just nodded. He sat on the edge of his desk and had to inhale deeply and mentally count to three before speaking again.

"So... What brings you to Hawaii?" Steve was to ask if something was wrong but edited it. The question sounded unpleasant to say the very least.

Steve's eyes found Matt's and they gazed at each other for what seemed to be a long time. Way too long for Steve's liking.

"I'm here because I believe you should know what happened..." Steve swallowed hard. "I could've sent a letter or a telegram but, I don't think it's the kind of message one should be told through a piece of paper."

By that time, Steve was clenching his jaw and hoping, praying, begging not to hear what he was already imagining. Please. Not London.

"It's about... It's about London," Matt said; his voice failing badly and making Steve hold his breath.

_No. No no no. Please, don't say..._

"Her current status is MIA."

* * *

><p>MIA.<p>

In a matter of seconds, because of three letters, just three goddamned letters, Steve watched as his already unsteady world falling apart.

MIA.

He had been through a lot while he was in the Navy. A lot. But, right now, hell week during training didn't seem that awful. This. This should be the worst moment of his entire life. It was easily the number one.

For a split second, Steve thought _'at least she was not reported KIA'_ but still...

MIA.

London was reported "Missing In Action".

How was that possible? For crying out loud, she was a doctor. A surgeon. She helped people! Why? Why her? Why London? His London... That was not fair. It was stupid.

"How?"

"London plus five other members of her unit were assigned to provide medical assistance and evacuation for a group of SEALs that were on a hawk that went down in Kajaki, Helmand. But the two air ambulances weren't big enough so, as the team leader, she chose to stay behind and gave direct orders for the pilot to take them all to Kandahar. She wasn't alone though; Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne, a Navy SEAL who was on the crash but not severely injured stayed as well, but when a chopper was sent to get them, both weren't found."

Steve heard Matthew's words quietly, but his mind was working full mode. He knew Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne. Steve and Chase joined Annapolis together, they became SEALs at the same time and Steve knew that Chase was dependable. If he was to face any hostile situations with one man, Steve would choose Hawthorne to be the one by his side. But, despite it all, he still was damn worried about London.

"When was that?" Steve asked after a minute, probably more. It was still hard to think; it was hard to process all that information... "The crash, I mean."

Matthew tossed his cap on the armchair he was standing nearby.

"April 8," he said defeated. "I know," Matthew added before Steve could say anything — and he would. Steve's eyebrows were furrowed and he was opening his mouth when Matthew continued. "I know what you're thinking: _'It was a long time ago'_. It was indeed. But communication is, not exactly complicated, but when it comes to this kind of news, the Army, as I'm sure it also happens in the Navy, is very strict so it took a while until I got the message — I only learned it about a week ago..."

Steve nodded. While he was still active in the Navy, he was the leader of a few missions so he knew how slow this process could get. And London being the daughter of a Major General, they needed to be sure of what they were saying.

"I would have come earlier but I had to deal with some things back in Georgia and then Hunter heard about London, he had just returned from a mission but obviously he instantly asked to go to Afghanistan and he was allowed to. So, forgive me for delaying it even more, I just..." Matthew made a pause. He was speaking slowly and calmly, not exactly a surprise for a military man, but Steve noticed it when he inhaled deeply, almost like pushing his emotions back down.

"I know," Steve said before the man could continue. He knew what he'd say anyways; that communicating someone is MIA is not as hard as giving the news that a loved one is KIA, but still... it's not nice, not pleasant to the ears at all. "And I appreciate you coming to Hawaii to tell me..."

"Don't mention it, son. I wouldn't have it any other way."

Steve nodded and thanked the man once again. His acceptance of Steve and London's relationship was something that went farther than anything he could ever expect — it was like he really considered Steve as his son. Like he was part of his family. It was overwhelming.

"Well, I think I've taken enough of your time. I'll get going..."

Matthew took back his cap and was about to take a step towards the door when Steve spoke again.

"Wait." He stood up and approached the Major General with one move. "Is Hunter in Afghanistan?"

"Yes. He went there with some of his men."

Steve nodded.

"Where exactly?"

"Last I heard, he was in Helmand."

"Do you think you could get his current location?"

"I believe so." Matthew looked at Steve, and he didn't have to look harder to know what he had in mind. "You're thinking about going there." That was not a question; it was a statement.

"I can't sit here and do nothing while London is out there... It's..."

"Brutal. Yeah. Believe me; I know how tough it is..." Matthew's eyes traveled across Steve's office but he wasn't exactly looking at anything.

Steve looked at him with huge respect and admiration. It was remarkable how he could handle this after his wife and son's death.

"I'll make some phone calls," Matthew said before getting to the door.

"I really appreciate that."

* * *

><p>Danny was in his office talking to the Police Department in Maui when he saw the Army guy leaving Steve's office and the headquarters.<p>

Even though he wasn't in the same place they were nor had heard what they were talking about, Danny could see the tension that had settled there just by looking at his partner. He knew Steve enough to know when something bothered him and made him change his ways. And that's exactly what was happening.

"Hey," Danny said as he entered Steve's office. Even though he didn't knock, he wanted to announce his presence there.

"Danny."

"So..."

"So... what?" Steve asked; he was staring blankly through one of the glass walls of his office but turned to look at Danny. Quite reluctantly, and the blonde detective noticed that.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"_Nothing_... Okay."

Danny then stood still in front of Steve, his arms crossed across his chest, his eyes locked on Steve's.

Steve noticed that Danny was in his detective mode — full throttle — and he knew he wouldn't just give up. Not Danny. He rolled his eyes.

"Major General Matthew Alexander came here to bring news on London."

"And?"

Steve took a long deep breath before answering. "And... she's MIA."

"MIA... You mean she's—"

"Missing In Action." Steve felt his throat getting dry and his heart aching as he said those words. Major General must've been through hell; he delivered that news not only to Steve but also to Hunter, not to mention he learned it from a piece of paper. "Yes."

"Wow..."

That was pretty much everything that Danny had to say after hearing that. Even though he had imagined some possible scenarios for London's father unexpected visit, it stunned him to actually hear what that was about. Danny was in shock, and he was only her friend.

Then he looked at Steve. For someone who had just heard that his girlfriend was missing in Afghanistan, Steve was ominously calm.

"Now what?" Danny asked but, immediately after voicing that question, he realized how unnecessary it was.

. . .


	36. Chapter 36

_Thank you everyone who's still with me! Thanks for the reviews, for favoriting and alerting this story; it means a lot to me._

_It took me a while to update it again and for that I'm sorry but every now and then I hit a wall and I just can't write, even though I know exactly what I want to write... weird, I know. Anyways, if you have any constructive critique, suggestions, anything, feel encouraged to leave a line on a review or PM me. Feedback is highly appreciated._ :)

* * *

><p><em>"Now what?" Danny asked but, immediately after voicing that question, he realized how unnecessary it was.<em>

It took him just one second and one look at his partner to know what was coming next; it was written all over Steve's unusually worried face.

"You're going there, aren't you?"

"She needs me, Danny." This time, Steve's answer wasn't exactly calm and steady.

Whatever remains of the impressive composure he had while Major General was there, it had gone out the window. It was hard to keep calm when the woman he loved was God knows where. He didn't know how she was, where she was, if she was hurt, if she was being hurt — he knew nothing. Absolutely nothing... and that was so freaking unnerving.

But Danny knew Steve; he knew when his partner was just wearing his mask of a tough guy — he knew it was happening right now. So he chose to ignore his aggressiveness. It was crystal clear that Steve was torn; he didn't need any more drama to his like right now.

"Okay... I know that, and I totally understand your point. Just... How you plan to do it?" Danny asked carefully, but what he really meant was: _are you going there __**by yourself**__?_

Steve pressed his palm against his eyes and started pacing — the lack of action was starting to get on his nerves; that and the fact that he didn't have a plan to go by.

"I don't know, Danny," he admitted feeling a somewhat defeated. Steve hated uncertainty and, right now, that was practically the only thing he had. "All I know is that I have to do something. Anything. I have to help her..."

Danny just nodded. He knew that nothing he had to say would help much; Steve was deeply disturbed. Danny then remembered when Mary Ann was kidnapped and Steve went ballistic. Also, even though they hadn't met yet, Danny was willing to bet that when his parents died it also affected him just as much...

He knew Steve wouldn't let go until he saw London again, whether she was breathing or not — and Danny prayed to God to be the first possibility, because if it was the latter, then he'd have to tell Grace that her Auntie London wasn't coming back, and she asked about it every now and then...

"I understand," the blonde whispered. "Can I just suggest you, don't be a hero alone?"

Steve glanced at Danny. Five seconds later, he had pulled his phone from his pocket and was calling someone.

"Lonegan, it's Steve... I need a favor, man..."

.

Less than fifteen minutes later, Steve parked his Chevy Silverado in one of the empty parking spots next to the Naval Base entrance and literally ran into the building.

When Danny suggested him to "do not be a hero alone", he just spoke what Steve was already thinking — requesting specialized backup. So, he called one of his SEAL friends that was currently stationed at Pearl, Aaron Lonegan.

Aaron also knew Chase Hawthorne so it wasn't necessary any briefings because, being an active member of the SEALs, he already knew about Hawthorne's situation, so he asked Steve to meet him at Pearl.

.

"Hey, Iceman."

"Smoothdog... It's been a while."

Steve didn't have much trouble finding his former SEAL buddy. Aaron with his pale skin, platinum blonde hair, green eyes and very evident traces of Northern European descent always stood out; he was like a spotlight when he wasn't on the field. When he was in action, he was the definition of commitment; a hundred and ten per cent focused, he didn't even sweat - definitely an Iceman.

The two men shook hands and gave what could have been the quickest man hug in history, but, given the occasion, it was understandable.

"I've heard you got Hesse."

"I did."

"Nice. After that hell we've been through."

Steve tried to smile but it didn't come out as planned. No one could blame him though. "About Hawthorne..."

"Yes. Right... We've been told Hawthorne's status is MIA and we're going there."

Steve knew that by "we", Aaron meant him and his SEAL team but he didn't mind. That was all he needed to hear.

"Who's your CO?"

Aaron frowned. "My CO? Why? I mean... Why do you ask?"

"I need to speak with him."

Aaron just kept staring at Steve like what he had just said didn't make any sense, or he was waiting for him to continue.

"I need to go to Afghanistan."

"Wow… Are you serious?"

"Very."

"Why?"

Steve took a deep breath and ran his hand through his short hair. There he was, talking about it again...

"Because my girlfriend is there too."

"I'm sorry, what?"

Aaron's eyes widened when he heard that. He wasn't sure if he got it right but Steve said it very clearly and there was nothing in his voice suggesting he was joking. Steve was dead serious, but Aaron did not see that coming.

"My girlfriend is in Afghanistan; she's a doctor and was helping Hawthorne's team when... they went missing."

"Oh man..." For a few seconds, Aaron didn't say anything. It was bad enough when he heard his friend was MIA, he couldn't begin to imagine what Steve was going through. His girlfriend was there too. But then, something got him thinking. He heard Hawthorne's bird went down and he heard that a rescue unit was sent to help them. Then, Hawthorne went MIA, along with an Army Captain... "Who is your girlfriend?"

"Her name is London," Steve said as calm as he could be. "Captain Alexander for the United States Army."

"Holy..."

When they were informed about Hawthorne's situation, they also learned that Captain Alexander was with him. Later, it came to their knowledge that the Alexander that went missing was related to the Major General, which caused a bit of a fuss.

"Yeah... So, who's your CO?"

"Captain Blackburn," said Aaron as he started walking. "C'mon, let's talk to him..."

* * *

><p>"You want to go back to Afghanistan," said Captain William Blackburn. Steve didn't know him all that much — up until now, he had only heard of him and that had happened when he was still an active member of the SEALs — so it was a bit unnerving stand in front of him and explain him why he was there. Steve decided to not mention the not so little detail that he was doing that for personal reasons, such as his girlfriend. He didn't think it was necessary for Captain Blackburn to know it, and he didn't want to say it again — it felt like, every time he mentioned that, London was getting more and more distant, and Steve didn't like that. He only said it was because Hawthorne was an old friend and had saved his life once — he wasn't lying.<p>

"Yes, sir."

"And the Governor knows about your sudden decision?"

Steve didn't answer right away; he didn't inform the Governor about his plans of taking a leave from the task force... Honestly, that thought didn't even cross his mind until now.

He was to answer Captain Blackburn's question when someone knocked on the door. Steve turned to look who was it and, with the corner of his eyes, he notice Captain Blackburn standing up.

"Captain Blackburn," greeted the man that had just entered the room. "Lieutenant Commander McGarrett."

Steve instinctively saluted the man; for obvious reasons, he knew him. "Admiral Malloy."

Hayden Malloy was the man with the highest rank in Pearl Harbor and Steve had met him a few times in the past.

The Admiral returned the gesture.

"I was told I'd find you here, Lieutenant Commander..." The Admiral spoke calmly as he walked with short steps until he stood next to Steve. "And I believe you already spoke with Major General Alexander."

Steve couldn't help but frown.

"Matthew Alexander is a friend of mine," Malloy explained, making Steve ease his expression a little. Just a little. "And I heard what happened."

"So you know why I'm here... Sir."

Blackburn glanced at Steve with wide eyes. No one would ever address the Admiral like he just did... But Malloy didn't seem to take offense on how Steve talked to him.

"I believe I have a fairly good idea," he said calmly.

"I need to go there, sir."

"Of course you do," replied Admiral Malloy and then, he turned to face the Captain. "Captain Blackburn, may I have a word?"

.

Steve waited while the two men talked. He couldn't tell hat they were talking about but he could only imagine it had to do with what he had requested, which was him going to Afghanistan.

He was not so patiently waiting when his phone rang; Steve forgot to put it on silent mode. He quickly took it out of his pocket and was to turn it off when he recognized the number, it was a phone call he was waiting for — Major General Matthew Alexander.

Steve glanced apologetically at the two men that were now looking at him but Admiral Malloy just waved and gave him a positive nod, indicating it was alright, he could answer it. Out of respect, he left the room and answered the call as soon as he closed the door behind him.

"McGarrett."

_"Steve, I spoke with Hunter as I said I would,"_ said Matthew. _"He's in Garmsir District, southern of Helmand Province, at Camp Dwyer, a military base and air field of the United States Marine Corps."_

Camp Dwyer, Helmand Province, USMC base. Steve tried to get that location in his mind. That's where he needed to get.

"Thank you, sir."

"_Don't thank me yet, son, I'm not done. I'm sending you the coordinates of the facility. I told Hunter you'd be on your way so he'll be waiting and will provide you anything you might need over there. Also, I took the liberty to speak with Admiral Hayden Malloy after I left the task force Headquarters and he might help you to get there. If not, well, you call me back."_

Steve's heart skipped a beat. That was way more than he could ask for. Sure it was his daughter who was missing but still, Steve was extremely grateful for that opportunity to go there and do something. He knew that, if he was out there and London was also there, she'd move mountains to help him — she made herself very clear about that when she explained him why she joined the Army in the first place — and now, now it was Steve's time to use his skills to help her. No matter what, he'd be there for her.

"Thank you, sir. I really appreciate what you did."

"_Don't mention it, son… Just one thing, be careful. I know how you feel and I get it's sort of – overwhelming, believe me, I do. But don't do anything reckless. If you get hurt, London will kick my ass when she find out."_

Hearing Matthew talking about his daughter like that made Steve force the air down to his lungs… He needed to find her. He couldn't fail.

"Roger that."

"_Right… I have some things to do, but call me if you need anything."_

"Will do. Thanks again."

Steve had just said that when the door behind him opened. He turned to see Captain Blackburn and Admiral Malloy leaving the room.

"Lieutenant Commander," called Captain Blackburn. "I believe you should inform the Governor that the Task Force will be down one man for a while." Steve finally breathed relieved. He didn't notice he was holding his breath until now. "A man with your skills will be a valuable addition to the team."

"Thank you, sir."

"You're welcome, Lieutenant Commander," said Blackburn with a small smile. "Now if you excuse me, I have some things to check. Gentlemen."

Steve and the Admiral watched as Captain Blackburn was getting smaller and smaller until he vanished through a corridor.

"I guess I owe you a thank you as well, sir," Steve said as he turned to face Hayden Malloy.

"Thank me when you're back," the older man said simply. "With Hawthorne and Alexander."

Steve nodded. With Hawthorne and Alexander. "Yes, sir."

* * *

><p>Two days after Steve went to Pearl, he was at the Hickam Air Force Base, about to board on an aircraft that belonged to the United States Air Force which would take him to Afghanistan.<p>

Obviously, he wasn't alone.

Danny, Chin and Kono were with him.

"Will you be careful out there?" Danny said looking at the huge airplane that was just waiting for the small group of men that were wearing their uniforms and saying their goodbyes to their relatives, friends, loved ones... "We won't be there to save your ass, so..."

"Aren't I always?"

Danny just glared at his partner.

"I'll be fine," Steve said but that wasn't much of a comfort for them all.

Even though they were trying their best to avoid the thought, the four of them couldn't help but remember that London had said the same words before she left... and look how fine she was...

"Don't be yourself and I might believe you," Danny said, trying to make the awkward silence that was threatening to settle just go away. He succeeded in some ways.

Steve half smiled and looked at his partner.

"Careful there, Danno... Your soft side is showing up."

"Shut up, you idiot. Why do you have to be an ass all the time?"

This time, Chin and Kono also smiled. It was an almost normal situation... except it wasn't.

"He's right, brah," Chin said softly. "Watch yourself, will ya?"

"Yeah," Kono added. "Even though fearless is sort of in your DNA, be careful."

"I will," Steve promised looking at his friends, his _ohana_. "I will."

Steve was ready to board when something caught his attention. Better yet, someone.

"Uncle Steve! Wait!"

Danny, Chin and Kono turned their heads and saw a little girl running towards them – Grace Williams. Steve crouched just in time to welcome her with a hug. If she was just a little big bigger, she'd have brought him to the ground, given the speed she was running; she almost tackled him.

"Hey, Gracie… How did you get here?"

"Mommy," she said pointing to Rachel, who had just joined them. "Daddy left a message…"

"Of course he did," Steve said glancing at his partner.

Danny looked at Rachel who was standing by his side and muttered "thank you". He knew that if he told Grace that her Uncle Steve left, that he had gone to Afghanistan and didn't say goodbye to her, she'd be pretty devastated. Grace adored her Uncle Steve. It wasn't school day, so he called Rachel and asked her to bring Grace to the Air Force Base...

"Where are you going?"

"I... I am going to Afghanistan," Steve said; there was a lump in his throat that didn't seem to go away. "To help Auntie London."

"Why? What happened? Is she okay?"

Steve had to take a deep breath before saying anything.

"Well, Gracie... She is missing, right now." Grace's eyes widened when she heard it; Danny hadn't told her.

"Is she lost?"

"Yes... She is lost."

Steve was still holding Gracie so he could perfectly see her reaction; she held her breath and closed her hands in a tight fist, holding a bit of his uniform in her grip.

"Is she hurt?"

"I sure hope not," Steve said as he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Grace wasn't crying, but she seemed pretty upset.

"She promised she'd be back..."

"I know, Gracie... And I'll do my best to help her keep that promise, alright?"

She just shook her head.

At that moment, someone called out Steve's name.

"Alright, then... Uncle Steve got to go now," he said and just like that, Grace's lips trembled and her eyes started to get wet.

"Be safe, Uncle Steve," she whispered, closing her arms around his neck once more.

Steve felt his heart sinking when he held Grace's tiny body in his arms, her head was resting on his shoulder. He'd be damned if he didn't come back, or if he came back without London...

"I will be, Gracie... I will be."

"Don't get hurt."

"I'll try not to."

They called him once again and Grace, reluctantly, let go of Steve.

"Okay..."

Steve stood up and brought his duffel bag with him.

"Okay... So, see you all soon. Don't miss me too much."

"Just go, find her and get back," Danny said picking Grace in his arms.

Steve half smiled, but it didn't feel like it usually did. It felt forced.

"Alright. Bye guys. Take care of my place and wheels for me while I'm out."

With a chorus of "okays", "byes" and "Be safe", Steve finally headed to the airplane.

He felt sad for leaving his team, his friends, his _ohana_, but he couldn't stay there... He couldn't.

.

Chin, Kono, Rachel, Danny and Grace stood there, without moving a muscle, or saying one word until the airplane took off.

"He's gonna be okay, right Daddy?" Grace asked when the huge airplane was nothing but a tiny little dot on the sky.

They were heading back to where they had parked the cars; Danny was holding Grace just as tightly as she was holding onto him.

"Uncle Steve? Sure he will, Monkey... He's done this before a million times. It's kind of like Disneyland for him."

"I don't like it," she said burying her head on Danny's shoulder.

"Yeah," Danny said absent-mindedly. "Me neither..."

"Daddy?"

"Yes, dear?"

"You won't go there too, will you?"

"Where? Afghanistan? No. No, Monkey, I won't... Why do you ask?"

"Because everyone seems to be going there lately..."

Danny only heard the muffled sound of her voice against his shirt, but it was really weak and more than enough to make him feel like a hand was squeezing his heart inside his chest. Danny wasn't happy, and Grace was just as sad, if not more...

He carried her all the way to the parking lot and she was pretty calm until he stopped by the Mercedes that belonged to Stan; Grace flinched.

"Time to go, Monkey..."

"Mommy, I want to stay with Daddy today."

Danny and Rachel exchanged a glance. It was Saturday, but it wasn't Danny's weekend...

"Sure thing, sweetie," Rachel said with a smile.

Danny looked at his ex-wife when Grace rested her head against her dad's shoulder once again.

"Are you sure?" he asked carefully.

"Yes. I think it'd be good... for both of you."

Danny tightened the embrace around his daughter's body and then he thanked Rachel. He would definitely appreciate spending some time with Gracie.

"Thank you," he said wholeheartedly.

Rachel smiled. "Don't mention it..."

* * *

><p>Steve had been quietly sitting in his place. It's been over fifteen minutes since his place left Hickam, and he was still numbed. He was going to where he wanted to be but he couldn't stop wondering if he wasn't too late, if... Steve cursed himself mentally for even considering that.<p>

He shot his eyes closed, let his head rest against the cold metal of the airplane fuselage and breathe. Inhale, exhale, inhale exhale. She was alright. He needed to believe she was alright.

Steve's finger found its way to the necklace and ring that belonged to London that he was wearing along with his dog tags... He held onto that tightly.

"I'm coming, London... Just hold on because I'm coming."

. . .


	37. Chapter 37

**Author's Note:** _Not sure if I ever mentioned this before but I just liked to say that, except for what I occasionally see in the media, I know pretty much nothing about Afghanistan, and I know even less about the military facilities, how they work and stuff like that... I assure you that all you might find, not only here, but throughout the whole story, is just my imagination and some research that I do _(Bing it!)_. So, if you're familiar with this world and find things very or slightly awkward here, PLEASE, let me know: __**message me**__! I highly encourage you to tell me if I'm doing something really wrong and/or messed up regarding the contents of this fic. Also, I don't intend to disrespect anyone or anything with the contents of this story, and I sure hope I'm not screwing things up._

_So, as you may have noticed, after a not so long, dark and cold winter, new update! This one was faster than I was expecting and I'm fairly pleased with it, even though I'm unsure of some stuff here and there..._

_**Feedback is highly appreciated and reviews are very much loved!**_

* * *

><p><strong>Camp Dwyer, Helmand Province, Afghanistan<strong>

It was almost 1pm, Afghanistan time when Steve finally got to Camp Dwyer. His flight left Hawaii at 6am, Hawaii time on a Saturday — it was already Sunday — so the time flight plus the huge time difference and the little road trip he had to take to get to the military base were more than enough to completely mess with one's system; not Steve though.

He had done this before so he knew what to expect; also, he had some extra motivation that wouldn't allow him to whine about what he considered to be minor and unimportant details.

"Hey, Steven! Over here!"

Steve had just hopped out of the back of the truck when he heard a familiar voice calling out his name. It was London's brother.

"Major Nakamura," Steve greeted Hunter as he approached him. Since he had his both parents' surnames, he picked his mother's.

"Commander McGarrett."

The formalities lasted about a minute, only until Steve introduced the other four men from the original Fire-Team he had come with. After that, they dropped it. There was nothing too much formal in that situation; they were there for the very same reason.

"I'm gonna be honest with you, man," Hunter said as he ushered Steve and, by consequence, the rest of the SEALs he came with, into the place Hunter and his men were using to go through all the information they had up until now which, sadly enough, wasn't too much. "It's good to see you again, but I wish the circumstances were different."

"Yeah. You and me both," Steve agreed with Hunter as they entered the small building where the Deltas had set up their headquarters.

In everyone's opinion, that was a very nice and surprisingly well equipped installation for an improvised HQ in Afghanistan. There were lots of electronic devices to assist the mission, not to mention the presence of the Delta Force.

Even though the Deltas were mostly known for their engagement in counter-terrorism tasks, they are versatile enough to assume other roles such as rescuing hostages, and, basically, that's what they were facing there. Rescuing people. And their involvement could be easily explained, given the fact that one of the people they were there to rescue was an Alexander...

"So, it's been about a week since we arrived here but only four days since we got the equipment you're seeing," Hunter explained after he spoke with one of his men shortly. He could see the curious look in every single one of the SEALs expression; it was also a nice time to brief them... "We have direct link to the Department of Intelligence Agency and we're trying to gather information on the current location of Captain Alexander and Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne... The location we have is where the hawk fell, which was Kajaki. We already searched the place, covering a 70 miles radius and nothing. We'll expand the searches and try different approaches in order to locate our people." Hunter made a stop for the first time and looked at the five SEALs that were listening to what he was saying. He didn't doubt they were tough men but they had just faces one long ass flight and drive and were standing there with all their belongings... They could be SEALs, but they still were people. "But we can get back on this later. Follow me and I'll show you where you're staying."

.

Hunter showed Steve and the four other SEALs the places they would get to sleep while in Camp Dwyer and told them to meet him back where they just had left in ten.

Obviously, Steve didn't wait.

"What different approaches we'll try?" he asked when he and Hunter headed back to what their command center.

"Reconnaissance teams."

"Patrolling troops?"

"With provisions and equipment to stay a while out, yes. Also, I'm thinking using aircrafts with electronic equipment to check close cities, districts, anything like that without having to deal with unnecessary combats."

Steve nodded in agreement. He liked the idea. "I'm in."

Hunter glanced at Steve with the corner of his eye. He knew, better than anyone, that Steve would want in. "I thought you'd say that."

"So, when will the units and the helicopter be ready?"

"Woah." Hunter came to a halt immediately, reaching out a hand to make Steve stop as well. "Hold it right there, sailor... I said we'd try different approaches, meaning we have to study the possibilities and all go through the risks and then we'd set our plan. I didn't say we'd jump in after discuss it for five seconds."

Steve looked at Hunter baffled, but Hunter ignored that; he just opened the door to the war room and walked in, but Steve didn't follow immediately.

"What are you waiting for?" he said, looking at Steve curiously. "You wanted in, come in. Let's work on the not fun part so we can set the best game plan we can."

Steve took a deep breath. He knew Hunter was right, he knew that if they just went out there with nothing planned, the outcome couldn't be good, he knew it; he just didn't like the idea of not acting, after all, London could be anywhere right now...

* * *

><p>The time difference between Afghanistan and Hawaii was significant — over fourteen hours —, so, after six hours in the war room and way too much caffeine, they were pretty tired; Steve more than the others since he didn't get any rest practically since Major General paid him a visit to give him the news, but he wasn't going to let his tiredness get in the way. Hunter noticed that.<p>

"Alright guys, we have it all settled for tomorrow. We should call it a day; our SEAL friends might need some rest."

They did have everything settled. Reconnaissance with aircrafts so they could go further and have a better view from above and a patrolling troop going by land and fully equipped and ready to stay at least a week outside the base, covering as much ground as it was possible and gathering as much information they could, all that being monitored by that very same room in Camp Dwyer. They had specialized people so their plan wasn't anything too outrageous or insane. Also, they were seeking progress.

Progress was all the mission was about because they needed a location and needed it as fast as possible. It's been a very long time since they were reported MIA and they still didn't have a precise location, and getting that was vital. Literally.

Most part of the joint team had agreed to what Hunter had said and went out to get something to eat, or shower, or just sleep as much as they could. "Most part of the team" being the key sentence; not anyone accepted it. As Hunter expected, Steve didn't move a muscle.

"Hey, you too," Hunter told Steve. "Go."

"I'm alright," Steve answered as he checked the satellites images for the umpteenth time.

Hunter sighed. That would be hell...

"Steve, I mean it," he said forcefully. "You have to go. Now."

Steve stopped going through the images and glanced at Hunter.

"No." The fact that Hunter was two years older than Steve and he looked a lot like his father in that photo that London had in her place made Steve swallow hard but he didn't flinch. The only thing that mattered to him right now was to find London. As soon as he could, and that still wouldn't be soon enough.

"Believe me, you don't wanna do this," Hunter said and he sounded very sure of what he was saying. Not threatening, but very grim.

"What I don't want is to prolong her time out there!"

"And you think I want that?" Hunter's voice was a tone higher but he didn't really care. "Huh? I'm just as worried about her as you are, McGarrett. She's my sister!"

Hunter pinched the bridge of his nose. He'd been trying to hold it together ever since he learned his little sister was missing in action, but you can only push things too much until it breaks. And with Steve there... well, he was her boyfriend, obviously he'd affected by that — hideous — scenario, so it was basically a matter of time until brains get in conflict with hearts. Hunter had his heart involved, but he needed to be brains right now. "She's my little sister... And I know that, the only way I can help her is being at the top of my game. I know it, and you know it. So, if you want to help her, you need to get out of here and get some rest."

Steve didn't say a word about a moment or two. He didn't have much to say. He was worried sick about London, but he couldn't begin to imagine how Hunter was feeling – or Matthew for that matter. Steve was her boyfriend, Hunter was her family, and he had lost almost half of his family already... That should be worst than hell...

"I can't," Steve said finally. "I can't rest knowing she might not be resting..."

Hunter had his back to Steve, but he turned when he heard him speaking. He had calmed down a bit. He had everything under control again.

"I know what you mean. I know what you mean because I can't either... but you need to try. If you want to help her, you need to be at your very best... otherwise you won't go anywhere."

Steve didn't say anything. Once again, he had to admit that Hunter was right. If he wasn't at his finest, he wouldn't be able to help London... And that was not an option.

And he was tired. Only then Steve acknowledged how exhausted he was. His muscles were aching from the trip and the stress and his head was starting to hurt. Resting seemed to be a good idea, even though he was quite sure he wouldn't fall asleep immediately — or at all for that matter. But he needed to back down. He needed to because he also became well aware of the fact that, even though he was a trained Navy SEAL, right now, he wasn't acting like one. His emotions were all too raw and evident; he needed to get a hold on it because that wasn't only out of character, but also useless. If anything, it could only make things worse. In order to help London, Steve needed to do what he was great at — compartmentalize and detach. It was a mission and he needed to be objective and not compromised.

"Alright," Steve said pushing his body from the table he'd been leaning against. His head seemed to spin when he did so. "I'm gonna..."

"Yeah, you do that," Hunter said walking with Steve out of the room. "Be ready at zero six hundred hours," he added, giving Steve a tap on his shoulder and watching the SEAL head to his accommodation.

.

Steve walked with heavy steps straight to the tiny little room that barely resembled a bedroom. There were two beds, two bedside tables, all separated by a thin wall. He'd be sharing the place with Aaron but the blonde guy wasn't there. Probably getting something to eat since they hadn't had any real meals; but Steve didn't feel like eating. He only grabbed some clothes, headed to the shower and then returned to his "bedroom".

He sat on his bed and took one thing out of his duffel bag — a photo. Absent-mindedly, Steve ran his thumb over London's face. She was smiling.

Steve blinked for just a second and it was like he had gone back in time. Suddenly, he was back in Hawaii and it was New Year's Eve, when the photo was taken. Steve had London in his arms; he was holding her close to him, her back was pressed against his chest and smiling as Grace took the picture. He could almost feel her soft skin, smell her sweet perfume, hear her laugh...

Almost.

Steve opened his eyes again, and there he was. Afghanistan. One more day without London.

"I'm gonna find you," Steve whispered; his eyes locked on the photo. "No matter what I have to do, where I have to go, I will find you... **I promise**."

* * *

><p><strong>Somewhere else...<strong>

Once again, London woke up to find herself in a cold and dark room. She didn't know if it was really cold or that was because she was soaked wet, but the coldness was so much that her bones were aching — probably why she woke up in the first place... Also, she had lost track of time and didn't know what day it was or if it was day or night... She didn't know much about anything at the moment, but she remembered she wasn't alone.

"Chase... Chase?"

London tried to call out the man that had been with her but what she heard didn't sound like her at all. Her voice was hoarse and grave, and she sounded like a drunk person, even though she didn't drink at all.

Speaking of drinking, London tried to swallow and tasted metal in her mouth. Blood. It would explain the sharp pain she was feeling on the side of the head and practically all over her body. London cursed her abductors...

Taking a deep breath, she tried to call Hawthorne again, but her ears were greeted with her own strange voice, followed by a deafening silence.

_Crap... Where the hell is Chase? _She thought to herself._ What did they do to him?_

"CHASE!"

This time, London tried to move but regretted deeply; she'd been lying on the hard ground and, when she made a little effort to change her position, she felt like her whole body was in flames and everything was hurting like hell. She tried not to yell, even though she also found out that she was cuffed. Actually, it didn't feel like handcuffs, but London knew her movements were being held by something.

"Fuck!"

She was in so much pain that she was almost falling into obliviousness but she didn't know about Chase. What if he was...

"No," she muttered to herself, while trying to push the thought aside, keep her breathing and heart rate at control. "Don't even go there, London." She didn't have time to panic — she didn't have the luxury. What she needed to was to think.

She had no idea where she was, how she was — why she was still alive — but she needed to get the hell out of there. After finding Chase, obviously.

"No one gets left behind... No one."

She inhaled deeply for a couple of times and started to look around and pay attention to what she was hearing. There were no windows, or, if there were, they were painted in black to avoid sunlight. There should be a door somewhere but again, she couldn't see any lightning or anything. Or maybe there were no doors; maybe she was underground. That would obviously explain the pitch black room and the coolness.

_"Well, this cannot be good,"_ she thought to herself when she closed her eyes, let her head fall back on the ground and took a deep breath one more time.

What were the odds of her leaving there? London didn't dare to answer that... It felt too ominous. She sighed softly and her thoughts drifted to the one direction they always went — Steve.

London tried not to shed a tear, but it was getting harder and harder with each and every day...

_"Definitely not good..."_

. . .


	38. Chapter 38

**Author's Note:**_ Hi readers! Well, it took me a long while to get this chapter done and, if you already checked my bio page, then you know that this story is heading to what I hope to be a brief _hiatus_. Yeah... I didn't want to and I tried my best to avoid it, but I'm afraid I couldn't. I'm hardly getting responses to my updates and it makes me think this is going downhill in a very fast pace. So, to try to save this story (because I seriously love it), I'm gonna take a break in hopes to make it better. If you have any suggestions, comments, literally anything, please, feel encouraged to tell me. As an aspiring writer, not getting feedback is very non-encouraging. I try to make it as close to perfect as I can, I put effort and time on this chapters but I don't know if it's working so I'll stop now. Anyways, I sure hope you enjoy this chapter and see you when I see you. Thank you everyone._

**Author's Note²:**_ Once again, I'd like to state the fact that all you might find here isn't real. It's all fruit of my imagination and some research. Pardon me if the contents of this story are somehow offensive or disrespectful — I guarantee you that this is not what I intended to do._

* * *

><p>At six in the morning sharp, Steve left Camp Dwyer with two SEALs and two Deltas, knowing they'd only come back after a week, probably two if it all went well. The five men were the patrolling troop that was held responsible for the land reconnaissance part of the plan they had came up with.<p>

"Alright," Hunter said as they hopped on the back of a truck, all but Steve. "You have the radio. Call base if anything goes sideways, we'll get to you and the team as fast as we can. And fourteen days is the maximum. After that, get back."

Steve almost half smiled.

"You know I'm not new to this, Hunter... I did this easily a hundred times before."

"I bet those hundred times, not even one was this personal." Hunter said seriously. It made Steve feel his heart tightening in his chest — he was right; things were never that personal. "Look, I just don't want to be held responsible for you getting your sorry ass hurt. London would kill me."

"If someone is getting killed, it will be the men who took her, not anyone else," Steve said almost darkly before he joined the four men on the back of the truck.

With a "good luck", Hunter watched as the truck made its way to the gates, with five men heavily equipped on the back.

He wished they would get back soon because, if they did, that would mean they had a location, and he was really worried about his sister. It's been over twenty days; he needed to find her immediately.

* * *

><p>"Guys, you do realize that we haven't heard of Steve since he left, right?" Kono said as one more day at the Five-0 Task Force Headquarters ended.<p>

It was a little before 7pm and they were all sitting at the table next to the screens and the computer.

Chin had taken a few beers he had in his office and, instead of hanging out in a bar, they were hanging out at the HQ. It felt distinctly odd to go to out for some drinks when the head of the original Task Force was somewhere in Afghanistan, looking for, not only his girlfriend whom was missing, but also a friend to all of them. It just didn't seem right.

"Yep," Danny said looking at his bottle very attentively, like that was the single most interesting thing he'd seen in days. "And that was over a week ago," he added emotionless.

"Guys, you do realize it's Steve we're talking about right? He'll be alright," Chin said, trying to lighten the mood.

Even though Kono nodded, Danny just brought the bottle to his lips and, after a couple of seconds; he placed it back on the table and sat straight.

"I agree with you," he said looking at Chin. "I agree that Steve's capable of doing things that I can't even imagine and live to tell the story... but we're talking about him going to a heated war zone to rescue someone he cares about a lot, more than I ever thought Steve was capable of. It just makes me wonder how reasonable he'll be, I mean, he's not exactly known for his calmness..."

Silence fell upon the three remaining Five-0s. Steve wasn't exactly poster boy for patience, but they needed to believe he'd be fine. They needed to, because the other option was just not acceptable.

* * *

><p>Steve contacted Camp Dwyer almost every night, when they stopped to rest.<p>

The days were long, hot and tough for the most part but they didn't waste any second of daylight. Thanks to some mutual agreement that was never really discussed, Steve was the man in charge of that task. All four men, the Deltas included, hardly disagreed with Steve, except for one time when Aaron and Steve engaged in a heated argument whether they should set camp or continue for another hour or so; they settle an agreement and, after that things became more manageable... but only at some extent.

After nine days out of Camp Dwyer, with little to work with, everyone was starting to get more than just a little frustrated.

"Lieutenant Commander McGarrett."

Steve, whom was checking the coordinates of where they were currently camping, turned to face one of the two Deltas that had came, Army Captain John Cartwright.

"Yes?"

"Permission to speak freely, sir?" requested Cartwright following standard procedure since Steve's rank was above his.

"Go ahead."

"With all due respect, sir, I think we should get back to Camp Dwyer."

"Excuse me?"

"It is my believe, sir, that we should get back, go through the information we acquired thus far and perhaps set a new approach, or at least study the options," explained Captain Cartwright fairly calmly, even though Steve didn't present himself with the same quietness. "We found some useful information such as a cell group that's connected to the Taliban was here around the time Captain Alexander and Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne went missing... I believe we'd be more successful if we try to follow their tracks, expanding our searches and contacting other bases or camps..."

Steve heard what Cartwright had to say but only half aware of his words. They heard about the Taliban's earlier that day and ever since, Steve himself had thought the same thing, not once, not twice... The only problem was — they would be heading back.

It was a little stupid — especially considering Steve's credentials as a SEAL and Naval Intel — but he just didn't like the idea of going back to Camp Dwyer. To Steve, the time he spent at the military facility was time that London spent with the perps that got her, and that wasn't a cheerful thought in any possible way, not even when he knew that it was the most assertive thing to do...

"Lieutenant Commander?"

Steve looked again at Cartwright. He had lost himself in his wanders for a split second but he knew what the Captain was waiting for. An answer.

"I'll present it to Major Hunter," Steve answered mechanically. "We'll discuss it and I'll let you know."

Captain Cartwright nodded, saluted, turned his back and left, leaving Steve alone to contact base. He then headed back to where his buddy — Captain Simon Halle — was standing, cleaning his gun like he always did at night.

"So?"

"He'll speak with Hunter," John said sitting beside his friend and pulling his own gun to check. He saw, with the corner of his eye, when Simon nodded.

"How did he take it?"

"Actually, better than I was expecting," said Cartwright looking at Simon again. "You know, for someone that close to Captain Alexander... I mean, we know her and everything but Commander McGarrett..."

Simon again nodded. Both John and Simon knew London from Fort Benning and also because of Major Hunter and Major General Matthew. Actually, there wasn't one single soul amongst those five men that wasn't the slightest bit related to either London or Chase, but Steve — and Hunter — took the prize.

.

Steve spoke with Hunter and told him what they'd found. The possibility of the Taliban involvement fell like a bomb for both men.

_"Are you sure of it?"_ asked Hunter; he sounded more than just a little grim.

"I'm sure of what we heard," answered Steve, using practically the same tone.

Hunter cursed. _ "What do you have in mind?"_

Steve took a deep breath and, even though he didn't exactly loved what he was about to say, he did it anyways.

"I think we should head back to Camp Dwyer, verify the legitimacy of what we have and work on something else, because if the Taliban is indeed involved, then we need to move faster than this."

There was a moment of silence after Steve uttered those words.

The Taliban wasn't exactly known for its tolerance and kindness toward women and, if they had London, neither of them wanted to think what she was going through, they just needed to get her faster than they could.

_"Alright. I agree,"_ Hunter said after a couple of seconds. _"I have your location. I'm sending a bird to get you guys. Stay put."_

"Roger."

With no other words, the call ended. Steve tossed the radio aside for a moment and shut his eyes closed. He was trying to not lose hope or faith, but with every second that passed, it was becoming harder and harder...

Then, Steve remembered a song he heard London singing once. He could even hear the words in London's voice...

_"Fight hard on a night like this  
>Look for a star and wish<br>You could get out of it_

_Bite down and then pray, pray, pray  
><em>_You'll make through this to sing and say  
><em>_You hold life dear_

_Moments turn to hours that become years  
><em>_And now I'm_

_Far from here and we are happy  
><em>_Far from here we are all right  
><em>_Far from here things are peaceful  
><em>_Far from here we have insight  
><em>_Far from here we've detangles  
><em>_Our strangled hold  
><em>_And I hope to see you there..._

* * *

><p><em>Oh, it's hard to imagine<br>__The things that we survive  
><em>_Will we understand it all  
><em>_One day when we arrive?_

_Far from here, we are happy  
><em>_Far from here, we are all right  
><em>_Far from here things are peaceful  
><em>_Far from here we have insight  
><em>_Far from here, we are laughing  
><em>_Far from here, we are thankful  
><em>_Far from here, we're forgiven  
><em>_And for that we're grateful  
><em>_Far from here, we've detangled  
><em>_Our strangled hold  
><em>_And I hope to see you there_

_I'll see you there..."*_

"That's a pretty song."

London indulged in a smile. Her voice wasn't louder than a whisper but he heard it — and, for all she could say, he was paying attention.

She was still being held in that dark cold place but Chase was there too and that was some sort of comfort. A very twisted one for that matter... He didn't need to be there. If he had done what she'd said, he'd be safe and sound now — as safe and sound as it was possible in Afghanistan anyways — but, instead, there he was...

"It's ominous," London said with a cheerful tone that was damn sarcastic.

"Sort of, yes... But it's also hopeful."

London didn't reply. She knew what Chase was trying to do and she should do just the same.

"We'll get out of here," he said after a handful of seconds. "Mark my words, Alexander. We will get out of here."

"Noted."

London heard it when Chase tried to move. She couldn't do the same; she was way too tired and her body wasn't hurting anymore — she was lying on the hard ground and wasn't feeling anything. Her body had numbed and she could be in that position forever now... It felt good and bad at the same time. She shouldn't feel like that.

"London?"

"Yes?"

"Hold on."

London sort of squinted. It was like Chase knew what she was thinking and that was just uber weird. Or not since he was there too, they've been going through the same hell together...

"You too," she replied truthfully.

"Do you have children?"

London shifted just a little but she barely acknowledged that.

"No... How about you?"

"Two boys and a beautiful girl."

London had to swallow hard and breathe more than just a couple of times. He had a family. He shouldn't be there.

"I think I would've liked being a mom," London blurted.

"You will be. I told you, we'll get out of here."

London didn't answer. Instead, she closed her eyes and allowed the numbness to fully embrace her.

. . .

* * *

><p>*The song is <strong>"Far From Here"<strong> by_ Alissa Moreno_


	39. Chapter 39

_After a brief two week hiatus, I'm back (sort of). I managed to work past my writer's block and continue with this story, although I might inform you that it might take a while until I get the next update posted. I'm currently working on the "Steve's Birthday Challenge" story and I'm trying to get it done due next Saturday, March 10th, so I'm putting all my other works on hold so I can accomplish that goal. Once again, I'm gonna ask you to bear with me; promise I'll continue with this story as soon as I can.  
><em>

_New chapter and I'd appreciate feedback or constructive critique, so feel free to leave a comment or pm me. _Thanks to everyone who's still with me. I very much appreciate you all.__

* * *

><p>Steve took a month of leave to leave Hawaii and go after London. He believed thirty days would be enough for him to find her and bring her home with him.<p>

Soon after he returned to Camp Dwyer after those ten days patrolling the area, the information that the Taliban were responsible for London and Chase's disappearing was confirmed, giving them all a very nice solid start. With that piece of information in hands, they could set strategies, plan raids, everything to try to locate where they were keeping London and Chase, and that was good. On the other hand, they couldn't forget that they were prisoners and, because they were Americans and not exactly welcome by some shares of the local population, that meant they were susceptible to torture to say the very least. The confirmation of the Intel tasted bittersweet, but it was still better than keep searching blindly.

They kept in constant contact with all Agencies that could help them with that task; even the Secretary of Defense was contacted once when Major Hunter stumbled across secret plans of a new terrorist attack against the United States, which gave them something that was close to the immunity Steve had with his Task Force in Hawaii. They didn't have full immunity and means but they had easy access to whatever they needed.

The future of that recovery mission seemed to be close and the end very promising. They had a location: a hidden and well secured building on the edge of a small city, next to the border with Pakistan.

The house was protected 24/7, there were men heavenly armed making patrols around the place, the walls were over three feet high. Such security system could be considered a hint that, whoever was in that place was considered a valuable target to both sides. Now, while London was a surgeon, Chase was a highly decorated SEAL so it wouldn't come as a shock if he was considered valuable.

May 13, 2011 was the day. After over thirty days since Captain Storm contacted Base Tinsley and reported Captain Alexander, United States Army, and Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne, United States Navy, as "_Missing In Action_", both sailors and soldiers were ready to put an end to that nightmare.

Even though they didn't have any visual confirmation of neither London nor Chase, they had gathered enough Intel to believe that they were there.

.

**May 13, 2011 — 11:23 AM**

"Alright everybody, listen up!" Major Hunter was speaking to a group of sixteen men, fully equipped, heavily armed, from both Army and Navy. "We have one goal today and it is to bring Captain Alexander and Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne back. We'll take the place, bring down the threats and guarantee the safety of our personnel. Keep in mind that we have an Army Captain and a Navy Lieutenant Commander, but also make sure to check for other prisoners. Failure is not an option, do you hear me?"

The end of Hunter's speech was pointed by a loud roar of "HOORAY!". That meant yes, they heard him.

.

**May 13, 2011 — 11:30 AM**

At 11:30am sharp, they left Camp Dwyer.

Four Humvees were transporting all sixteen men that would be part of the personnel recovery mission; the original group of sixteen was rearranged in four teams of four men, each one with a leader — Team Alpha's leader was Hunter, Bravo's was Steve, Charlie's was John Cartwright and Delta's leader was Aaron Lonegan — and hey all had devices that would allow them to communicate throughout the whole engagement.

It was a long ride — over ninety minutes — that they had to endure until they reached their final destination and, even though they were already on the move, each and every second spend in those vehicles felt like an eternity.

Steve felt damn nervous, but he knew better than to freak out and managed to keep it all at bay. It was hard, but necessary. Soon it would be just a memory... A damn crappy memory.

.

**May 13, 2011 — 1:17 PM**

They were currently surrounding the house; four teams were in position, each one covering one side of their target building but at safe distance. They needed to wait for the most appropriate time to invest.

Not one single soul amongst those sixteen men enjoyed waiting, but they were trained to do so and they knew how crucial that would be for the success of the mission.

_"We've got movement down West wing, over,"_ announced Lonegan.

_"Copy that, Delta,"_ replied Cartwright. _"We have movement at East wing as well, over."_

Steve patiently heard all team's report about the recent activities on the house. He had spotted some men who seemed to be security pacing all across the front gate and at the two balconies on the second floor.

He reported his status after Cartwright and heard Hunter's that soon followed. The place seemed to have way too much activity and people for them to strike immediately.

It would be a long day, but they were all in for the long haul.

.

**May 13, 2011 — 6:42 PM**

For near six hours, they stood still. Well, not exactly since Steve, Hunter, John and Aaron called an extraordinary meeting after almost four hours of surveillance.

_They've been watching for one hell of a long time and had observed some interesting details about the security system that was set to protect the house._

_"The guards seem to diminish considerably at every full hour on the front gate," said Steve when the four team leaders gathered together. "Maybe we can time it and use it as a cue to our strike._

_Aaron shook his head negatively. "I don't know, man. The movements on the west side aren't regular..."_

_"Neither on the east," said John Cartwright in agreement with what the other SEAL had said._

_Steve sighed nervously._

_"Alright," said Hunter. "Let's think straight and not overthink the situation. We have our communication system and we can try to make this work. Maybe they'll slip and reduce guard and then we can go. But that's one hell of a maybe..."_

_"Well, if it fails, then we go with plan B," Steve said calmly. Hunter and John looked at him, waiting to hear what his plan B was, but it was Aaron who answered it._

_"When the sun goes down, we go in," he said and Steve just nodded. The SEALs did that countless times before. "Sounds like a good plan to me," Aaron added with a smirk._

_"Yeah, me too," Hunter agreed and John nodded._

The moment to strike hadn't come yet, so they waited.

And waited.

And waited.

For a long while they just stood there, waiting for the best chance, the best window of opportunity for them to put the whole "recovery" part of the mission in progress and get it over with. They were all anxious to see the end of that but, if there was something they all learned during their trainings was patience. You have to know when it's time to go and when it's time to hold. Right now, it was time to hold.

Since "plan A" epically failed, they would go with the good old plan B. And that was where both SEALs and Deltas had advantage. Even though they were in a foreign country, which was their stage.

The sun went down and took the last remaining of brightness with it. It was quite a show to those who were actually paying attention. That was most definitely not the case of the sixteen men from the United States military surrounding the apparently innocuous house. They were getting ready to another show, one that they would be the main characters and, hopefully, would entertain an audience of only two.

.

**May 13, 2011 — 10:51 PM**

The sun was long gone now but still, the four teams surrounding the perimeter still had to choose an appropriate moment to strike and they needed to make sure that everyone would do it in synchrony. They really didn't want to risk the integrity of any of the sixteen men or London and Chase.

If they hesitate, if one person make one wrong move, that would mean how successful or how unsuccessful that enterprise was. And nothing less than perfection was accepted. Not to the SEALs standards or the Deltas...

When the clock was indicating it was 10:51 pm, Afghanistan time, they finally heard the one short word they've been longing to hear ever since they got into the Humvees that took them as close to the house as they could get.

Finally, after almost twelve hours surveying, Hunter's voice came through their communicators, indicating it was go.

_"GO! GO GO GO!"_

At the first "go", Steve and the three men that were with him, kicked the front door open and that's when the party started.

.

**10:52 PM**

The sound of guns being fired along with yelps of surprise when the people inside the house realized what was happening and the screams when a bullet tear through their flesh filled the first floor almost instantly.

It was quite a big house but still, Steve could tell that all sixteen men were doing exactly what they were trained to do; so much that only one bit of his attention was registering what everyone else was saying. No officers were down and no one had any sight of prisoners, and those were pretty much the only things his brain was paying attention.

.

**10:52 PM**

Steve's Team went further into the house; up until now, they had neutralized every single threat that showed up — they weren't keeping scores but there were about four bodies on the room they had left.

Getting into the next room, Steve found Cartwright and, with just a hand signal, he understood that it was clear. Steve then indicated the second floor and the Delta nodded. After briefing the two other teams, Steve and Cartwright leaded their men to the next floor.

.

**10:53 PM**

Steve was the first one to reach the second floor but, before he had a chance to step away from the stair, he was welcomed with gunshots.

He wasn't hit though — he managed to get behind a wall before any bullets could get too close to his body.

Cartwright, who was right behind Steve, notice his quick reaction and, instantly, he crouched, which gave him the opportunity to take down the shooter, since the man was focused on where he'd last seen Steve.

They exchanged a non verbal thank you before continue. There would be time for formalities later; right now, they needed to be damn fast.

.

**10:54 PM**

Since Steve and John were taking the second floor, Hunter and Aaron headed to the basement after they cleared the area.

The trapdoor that granted access to the lowest floor was hidden underneath a tapestry and a mahogany desk. They found it rather quickly because of the unusual thump caused by a dead body when it hit the floor.

Not wanting to waste any second, Hunter pushed the desk away and Aaron pulled the door open.

It was pitch black downstairs so they pulled the night vision goggles so they could have a better view.

Just like the rest of the house, the basement was quite large, but, instead of being crowded with people with assault rifles, shotguns and so many other kinds of weaponry, the place was dead empty. Nonetheless, they kept a steady and careful pace until they reached a huge and heavy door made of what seemed to be steel with three heavy bars of the same material to keep it closed.

"I'm gonna need help here!"

.

Steve and John had just cleared the second floor and were checking for any useful information or any hiding places when they heard Hunter's voice, saying he'd need help. It took just one glance at Steve for John to know that the SEAL needed to be wherever Hunter was.

"Go," he said simply.

Steve looked at Cartwright for just a second before nodding and running downstairs, jumping two steps at a time. By the time he got to the basement, they had removed the third bar and were opening the door.

Hunter went in first, soon followed by Aaron; Steve rushed but was only the fifth men to get inside the dark room.

When all nine men were in there, the thickness of the atmosphere embraced them all and silence settled. No one said a word for a very long moment.

"There's nothing in here," said one of the Hunter's men, Steve couldn't tell the name of the guy. But he was right...

.**  
><strong>

**May 13, 2011 — 10:55 PM**

Except for the rescue squad, all two floors of the house and the basement were dead empty. No signs of London or Chase.

. . .


	40. Chapter 40

_Oh hai! I know, I know… I suck when it comes to updates. But I hope you guys can forgive me since life sort of got in the way, and creativity sort of turned its back on me (I hope we're good now but only time will tell)... Amyways, know that I will not give up on this story, no matter what, I'll finish it!_

_I literally just finished this chapter and didn't do much edit so, forgive my typos and any eventual mistakes I'm pretty sure you'll find. Also, if you have any suggestions, constructive critique, feedback in general, feel encouraged to click the review button and drop a line! Mahalo everyone who's still reading!_

* * *

><p>The rescue unit returned to Camp Dwyer immediately after acknowledging their failure. In all honesty, it wasn't a complete failure; Cartwright had found documents proving that the house worked as some sort of command center for the Talibans and they had frustrated what would be a surprise attack against the American troops. But still, to Steve and to Hunter were deeply frustrated. Even though both had training, the latter was able to conceal it a bit better that Steve.<p>

"We'll find them," said Aaron, once they were all inside the hawk that would take them back to their base.

Steve didn't say a word; he just kept staring at the landscape painted in dark colors. He was trying his best to not give in to the dark thoughts that were surrounding his sanity, like jackals flying over a corpse, but, right now it was hard.

"We will find them, Smooth dog," Aaron repeated reassuringly, giving a light tap on Steve's shoulder. He could tell that his SEAL buddy was struggling, and he couldn't even begin to imagine how hard it was for him to be stuck in that situation — his girlfriend was still missing, just like Chase... For a man who would follow the "leave no man behind" no matter what, go back to base without the people they were to rescue was one tough outcome to accept...

When the helicopter landed on the landing area of Camp Dwyer, Steve was the first man to jump out of it and head straight to the small accommodation that was his room. Wisely, no one followed him. Not that he noticed though; as soon as he reached it, he barged into the room, slammed the door with a bit more strength than it was really necessary. He was mad. Steve was downright furious and he couldn't hold it back anymore.

He didn't hear it, but he screamed. He let out a roar of pain as his hands turned into fists and he punched the wall. He didn't feel it, but he had cut himself doing so. Steve was just numbed. It's been a month since London disappeared and all they got right now was nothing. They had nothing. He punched the cement wall again and let his head fall against the dull grey wall.

His breathing that was heavy just seconds ago was slowly going back to normal. His heartbeats were slowing down as well and he felt tiredness. Steve quickly got rid of his uniform and equipment until he was wearing only T-shirt, pants and boots.

Then he made his way to the small bed and let his body fall on it. He felt physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted. The hours spent on the field, the tension of the waiting, the adrenaline of the striking, the empty basement, the way back, the punch on the wall... Steve had reached the edge, taken the big dive and crashed on the bottom.

He looked at his hand — he had probably broken a few bones but that was the least of his concern...

His healthy hand flew to the wooden nightstand on his right and he took the one thing that, up until now, kept him going. Held tightly on his grip, was the picture of the young and beautiful woman that he longed to hold in his arms.

Steve didn't need a photo to be reminded of her and her beautiful dark eyes, curly black hair, bright smile and never-ending joy. Whenever he closed his eyes, whenever he blinked, she was there. She was always there, so close that, if he reached out, he would even be able to touch her... But it never happened.

"London..." Along with her name, Steve felt a single tear falling from his eyes and dying on the pillow. He then shut his eyes closed. He wasn't going to cry. He didn't have the luxury to do so. So he took a deep breath and pushed the tears back. He didn't have the luxury...

Steve was so worn out that, not seconds after he closed his eyes, he fell asleep. He fell asleep and he had a dream. And when he woke up the next day, he had it together. Barely, but he was ready to get back on the fight.

* * *

><p>The following days were stressful to say the least. He had indeed broken his hand so he now had a new accessory to wear all the time — a cast.<p>

Pretty much everyone had heard that the United States Armed Forces, in a joint mission, were able to dismantle a small cell of terrorists and the Secretary of Defense had personally called to acknowledge their efforts.

Steve was deeply glad to be able to help his country and the other soldiers that were endangered by the plans of the Talibans, but still, there was this part of him that wouldn't let him stop thinking about the two MIA. Not that he was trying to stop thinking about it, but with every day that went by, every hour without them... Those thoughts would only grow with impatience. Steve knew he was involved with that mission, but he didn't know exactly how deep it was until the day when Hunter called him for a private conversation.

"I spoke with one of your men, Aaron," he said when he and Steve got to the office of the Navy Captain responsible for that Base. "He told me you were in the Reserve before coming to Afghanistan."

"Yeah."

"He also told me you took a leave of absence from the Governor's Task Force in order to come here..."

Steve shifted. "What are you trying to say?" he asked quite bluntly. He knew Hunter wasn't being straightforward, and he wasn't enjoying his elusiveness.

"Your CO called yesterday," Hunter revealed and it didn't ease Steve's stern attitude. "He said you need to go back."

Steve felt like an invisible hand had punched him with strength enough to knock him out. Of course it didn't happen, but he didn't show reaction for a few seconds.

"You're saying you expect—"

"It's not me who's saying it," Hunter said, interrupting Steve's quite abrasive words. He could tell that the SEAL wasn't the least bit content with what he had just told him, and he sure couldn't blame him for that. He wouldn't take that easily either if he was told to back off. "I'm just passing on the message."

Steve turned his back to Hunter and paced for a couple of seconds; when he stopped, he just ran his healthy hand through his short hair.

"I can't go back," he whispered to himself, but Hunter heard it.

The Army Major looked at the man in front of him. Steve was in distress; his turmoil was visible and almost palpable and Hunter felt bad for what the man would have to do... Steve had direct orders to go back to Hawaii, and doing that, receiving such orders and knowing that he didn't get to accomplish the mission he had when he arrived there was a tough thing to ask from a soldier. Sailor. The designation didn't matter, what mattered was that he was being asked to go back home, while two people that were important to him were far from being at home.

"Who spoke with my CO?" Steve asked suddenly; his voice void of feelings.

"Captain Peters," the man with Asian traces responded promptly. Peters was the man in charge for the Base. He served in the Navy, but he was a Marine instead of a SEAL. Before coming to Afghanistan, Steve didn't know him, but he knew him now.

"I need to talk to him."

.

Steve did spoke with Peters, but it didn't help all that much.

"I got a phone call from Pearl while you were out," explained Gabriel Peters; he was pretty calm when Steve asked not so kindly about the call. "I was told you had direct orders to return and, trust me, I tried to convince your CO to allow your staying here to be a little longer but I wasn't lucky. I'm sorry."

Peters wasn't lying. He watched, during the four weeks that Steve was in his Base, how committed and how driven he was with his assignment. He and Major Nakamura had an amiable relationship and even before the SEALs arrived, he was aware of Steve's motivation. And he did try his best to convince Steve's Commanding Officer to just give him more time. They had put so much effort on that task for them to just call and tell him that he should leave. It wasn't fair. But the Captain on the other end of the phone call couldn't give Steve that extra time. He was a SEAL and he was on the Reserve, but he was also the team leader of a Task Force that was created by the Governor of Hawaii. He didn't answer solely to the Navy; he had other obligations as well.

And Steve knew that. He knew all of that. That Peters was being honest, and that he'd have to go back. He would most definitely try to go back, held speak with the Governor and he'd reassume his SEAL identity but he was well aware of the fact that his month in Afghanistan was over. And his heart felt like it weight a ton inside his chest. Thirty days and still no London... It would be a tough journey, the one back home...

On May 25th, Steve boarded on a plane that belonged to the United States Air Force and, with many other men and women that served on the armed forces, he went back to the United States and to his _Ohana_ — they were probably the only thing keeping Steve from breaking the rules, going rogue and staying in Afghanistan... The Five-0s were his rock. Along with London, he knew that being with friends again would give him perspective and he really needed it. Because, right now, Steve felt defeated...

* * *

><p>It was Thursday, May 26th, 2011 when the airplane that took off in Afghanistan landed at Hickam Air Force Base, in Honolulu, Hawaii, bringing Steve and a few other sailors and soldiers back home.<p>

The first thing that crossed Steve's mind was how familiar everything felt. It was just like when he returned home from Iraq. He was back, but didn't want to be back... Also, just thinking about that memory made his mind drift back to London...

"Okay, this has to stop," Steve chided himself mentally as he held tightly onto his duffel bag and headed outside the Air Force Base. "This is not taking anyone anywhere."

It was hard enough for him to not have London there; he didn't need to start over thinking everything that had to do with her. He would have her back eventually, just, in the mean time, he needed to buck up and deal with it the best way he could; for his sake and for London's.

Steve didn't remember calling Danny beforehand and asking him to come pick him up so he had to go for a cab. Not that he mind though. He was eager to spend some time with his friends again, but right now, he was quite glad to have this time for himself. He knew that he was like an open book and he really didn't need someone asking him a buttload of questions about his looks — which, thanks to Iceman, he now knew to be pretty crappy — and he knew that that was exactly what he'd have with Danny.

Once he got to his house, the emptiness hit him. Everything looked just the same, except it didn't. Something wasn't right. Something was missing. Someone was still missing.

After a quick inspection of his place, Steve then decided he couldn't bear the solitude any longer. In less than ten minutes, he took a quick shower, changed and left his house, knowing exactly where he needed to go: the Hawaiian Task Force Headquarters.

.

Kono and Chin were stuck at the office; Chin Ho was going through the bureaucratic part of the job, more specifically, their last case — a bomb threat that lead the Five-0s, SWAT and HPD to evacuate the Consolidated Theatres Ward 16 and creating quite a chaos in the process, which was the perfect distraction for a kidnap that they learned about half hour later but they were also able to avoid any major tragedies —, while Kono was on the phone when the glass doors went open and heavy footsteps could be heard entering the almost desert place.

Chin was the first one to acknowledge the presence of the head of Five-0. He soon dropped the papers and headed outside his own office to meet with Steve, in the middle of the war room.

"Hey... Didn't know you were back in town."

Steve stopped by the Smart Table, where the Asian was standing. "Yeah," he said with a tired nod. "My leave ended and I was reminded of my duties..."

"What's with the hand?" Chin asked looking at his left hand, where Steve had a cast.

"A little misfortune," he said looking at the reminder of his unaccomplished mission.

Chin noticed that there was a strange thing going on with Steve's tone, but he didn't feel like prying into his business. At least not now when he seemed that worn out.

"So," Steve continued, trying to sound casually. "How's everything?"

"Everything's good. We've been quite busy but nothing we couldn't handle..."

Steve once again nodded and a weary smile played with the corner of his lips for a few seconds. He was very thankful for Chin's discreetness and very glad that he didn't started questioning him about... well, basically everything. Now that he thought of it, he looked around and noticed the unusual silence.

"Where's Danny?" he asked when he saw his partner's office dead empty.

Chin shifted in the same place. He didn't like what he was about to say. "Danny is at the hospital."

"What? Why?"

"There was an accident during our last case and he had to be taken to the hospital, but it was nothing serious," Chin added when he saw the worried look on Steve's face. He knew how the man didn't like it when any of his _Ohana_ got hurt or were put in danger.

"What accident?"

"A car accident. Danny was chasing down a suspect with a patrol car from the HPD and this guy didn't hear the sirens and hit Danny, full on the side. Lucky enough it was the passenger side but still, he got more than a couple of bruises, some scratches, some nasty cuts but the doctor who saw him decided to admit him for twenty four hours because he hit his head pretty badly and they didn't want to take any chances..."

Steve ran his hand down his face. That was just terrific...

"Oh hey, boss." He turned to look Kono just leaving her very own office. First thing she noticed was the cast. "Let me guess... Part of the job?"

"You know it," he replied raising his injured hand.

Maybe Steve wasn't being able to hide his heavy new baggage because, as soon as Kono joined them, he saw the genuine smile turn into something forced right before his eyes.

"It's good to see you again, boss..."

"It is good to be seen again, Kono." Steve managed to sound a somewhat cheerful. He was glad to be there... at least half of him was.

"So... Danny called," she said after a very brief moment of silence. "He said he needs a ride back home. Doctor just discharged him."

"I'll go get him," Steve offered promptly. Chin and Kono nodded in agreement.

"He's at the Hawaii Medical Center, brah," Chin informed as Steve walked towards the glass doors. The Five-0 leader had his back turned to the cousins so they didn't see the hurt in his eyes as he left the Headquarters.

Chin and Kono watched intently as Steve disappeared through the doors.

"So... What happened?" Kono asked her cousin when her boss was no longer in sight.

Chin shook his head negatively. "I don't know... But if I had to guess, I'd say that it's more about what did not happen..."

Kono waved her head, indicating she knew what Chin meant. Part of her knew that it should be because of Afghanistan and, consequentially, London... but the other part of her was hopefully wishing it wasn't.

She felt bad when she realized that unfortunate truth; so did Chin.

* * *

><p>Steve parked his car in front of the very familiar hospital. He didn't even have time to revive his old ghosts when he saw the blonde figure of his partner waiting for a ride.<p>

"And you say I'm a magnet for trouble," Steve said as he got out of his truck and walked towards Danny.

"And that cast you're wearing, my friend, tells me I am damn right," replied Danny with a smile. He even hugged the tall dark haired man he had for a partner. "I'm glad to see your ugly face again."

"I'm gonna take that as a compliment, Danno."

Danny chuckled. "Yeah, you do that... animal."

For the first time since God knows how long, Steve found himself smiling quite genuinely.

"So," Danny said as they walked back to Steve's truck. "How was it?"

"Afghanistan?"

"No. Venice. Of course I'm talking about Afghanistan!"

Steve smiled once again but that didn't last longer than a second. "Well, it was hot," Steve said as he walked around his truck. "Dry. Sandy."

Danny looked at his partner suspiciously as they both got in the car. It's been a month since he didn't see Steve but he knew his friend, and was damn positive he was deflecting.

"So... Not good, huh?" Danny asked when Steve closed the door and was to start the engine of his truck.

Steve didn't answer instantly. Instead, he held the key to the ignition for a couple of seconds before bringing the engine to life and pulling the car out of the parking spot. Only when they were back on the streets that Steve spoke again.

"Not good is an understatement, Danny," he said and his voice sounded ominous, even to his own ears.

"You... didn't find her, did you?" Danny asked carefully. He knew that should be one hell of a delicate subject and the last thing he wanted was to put more pressure and add more stress to Steve right now. He seemed stressed enough.

Steve went rigid. He closed his fingers around the steering wheel with so much strength that his knuckles were turning white. "No, I didn't," he said through gritted teeth.

Those three little words said more than Steve imagined. Danny didn't need to ask any more questions to know that those thirty days were quite like hell for the Super SEAL.

"She's fine, Steve," Danny said after a moment. "She's tough. I mean, she can handle you and still be happy about it..." He saw a ghost of a smile playing with the corner of Steve's lips. "They'll find her," Danny added reassuringly.

Steve nodded. He needed to hear that and he needed to be reassured of that because, sometimes, even though he was hoping and would never lose hope, he had quite a hard time believing that...

"Thanks, Danno."

Danny smiled. He was quite sad for learning that London was still somewhere in Afghanistan, but he also knew that Steve needed some support, and if he could do that for his friend, he would put the sadness aside and just be there for Steve. For everyone's sake.

"Anytime, babe."

. . .


	41. Chapter 41

_I just wanted to state the fact that I've never been to Hawaii and I have no idea how Memorial Day on 2011 was celebrated. I did some research but I didn't find anything very specific so I pretty much came up with some things… Pardon me if I'm not making justice to it._

* * *

><p>To Steve's delight — and everyone else's desperation —, the next days were pretty eventful.<p>

Friday, they had to deal with a gang that invaded the First Hawaiian Bank, made two dozens of hostages and were requesting a private jet so they could flee the island.

The Five-0s, along with HPD and the SWAT team of specialists managed to work with that very delicate situation very nicely; not one hostage was hurt and the five men were take in custody, but only after twelve very long hours.

Saturday, they had to deal with a _Maile_ AMBER Alert. A twelve year old girl was abducted from her house. HPD activated the Alert when a blood sample that was found on the victim's room; the girl was also diabetic, meaning she had medicine to take and those weren't taken.

When dealing with missing children, time was always an issue. Statistics weren't on his side but they didn't let that slow them down, on the contrary, they worked even harder, and that was compensated.

Kauai Police got a tip that proved to be right, the Five-0s flew to the island and they did find Lena Kamali'i. She was in bad shape but the EMTs were prepared so, except for the psychological trauma, she got out of that okay.

Sunday went considerably calm, but Steve still managed to keep his mind busy, so he spend almost his entire day working on his father's Mercury Marquis, inside and outside, then he cleaned his entire house, he was also planning on going for a run but soon dismissed the idea when he remembered what day it was.

With that thought taking over his whole being, Steve saw the moon slowly give place to the sun, and he literally witnessed Sunday turn into Monday right before his eyes.

But it wasn't any other Monday. No.

It was May 30th, 2011. The last Monday of May, meaning it was Memorial Day.

Steve checked his watch and learned it was only 5:25 in the morning, still early but he could already feel that this year, his Memorial Day would be considerably different from any other he had before...

Steve sat there for quite a long while, doing nothing but watching the waves crashing on the shoreline and he was only interrupted when Chin showed up.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Asked the Asian when he found Steve on his lanai. "Are you hiding back here?"

Steve shifted his eyes from the ocean to his old friend that was walking towards him. "No. I'm just... Sitting here."

"I knocked," Chin said as he approached Steve, who hadn't move.

"Sorry I didn't answer the door," Steve said looking once again to the view in front of him.

Chin looked at Steve more intently and noticed something that he'd seen only once before this day and it was at his mother's funeral — he saw great sorrow and torment. He didn't need to be an expert in human behavior, a psychic or anything to figure out why though, he knew.

He knew why and, more than that, he knew Steve and that was the reason why he was there.

"Can I?" Chin asked indicating an empty seat beside Steve. He nodded. "Sure."

The two men remained in silence for a while. They both had a few things in mind but it still wasn't the time. Not yet.

"So, what brings you here?" Steve asked for what could have been only a few minutes or maybe half hour. None of they were keeping track of time.

"I was passing by," Chin said with a shrug.

"Of course you were," Steve replied quite amused.

Chin smiled mildly.

"What are your plans for today since, you know, we're not working?" Steve asked as casually as he could.

"I— I was thinking about going to the annual Mayor's Memorial Day Ceremony." Chin's answer was careful. He knew that, right now, the Memorial Day should be one very delicate subject. He looked at Steve, but the man's countenance was still calm. Chin didn't know whether that was a good or a bad thing. "You?"

Steve took a deep breath. "Yeah... Me too," he said after a moment.

Chin nodded. He had come down to Steve's place because he knew that this was a fairly important day for him; he knew that, when his parents were alive, they always took Steve and Mary to visit the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific. Always. And, this year... This would be the first year he'd be home for Memorial Day since the last time he had been in Hawaii, when he was fifteen years old. He buried his father next to his mother around eight months ago, he had to send his sister back to LA to ensure her safety and, to top everything, there was London...

"Would you like a ride?" Chin offered, but Steve declined it.

"Thanks, but I'll drive..."

Chin smiled. "As you wish," he said while standing from his chair. "But, if you allow me, you should start moving... The Ceremony is set to begin at 8:30 a.m., and it's almost 8 already."

.

Steve walked Chin to the door and headed upstairs; it was only then that he became fully aware of his tiredness. He had stayed up the whole night, sitting on his lanai and, even though he couldn't have had any sleep, he was feeling the consequences of his choice.

After showering, Steve had practically convincing himself of not attending the Ceremony. He changed into a pair of dark grey sweatpants and headed downstairs only to grab a glass of water when something caught his attention, making him stop dead on his tracks before he could get to the kitchen.

Steve turned his head slowly until his eyes landed on the object of his attention. It was a portrait. A very simple portrait that didn't illustrate a moment of Steve's life. No. It was someone else's life... It was London's.

He took one careful step forward and he took the piece of adornment in his hands. A much younger version of London was smiling at him; she wasn't even twenty years old when the photo was taken... And he knew that because she had told him about that photo before...

_"That was when I got into Medical School."_ Steve closed his eyes and his memories took him back to the first time he went to London's apartment, when she was still a resident at Hawaii Medical Center. _"This picture, it was taken shortly before I left to college."_ He could hear her voice so clearly, like she was there, by his side, like when she first told him about her family. They were all in the Army. _"It was also one of the rate times that we were all together..."_

He snapped his eyes open and looked around; London wasn't there... He still had the photo in his hands, and he felt his heart aching when he looked at the beautiful young woman. Then, his eyes drifted to the two men that were by her side, hugging her. He knew both. The one on her left was Hunter... and the one on her right, was Nathan. Nate as she used to call him. Both United States Army. Only one still in action...

Still holding that picture in his hands, Steve looked to the other portraits on the shelf. Those were his memories. He saw pictures of him and Mary when they were kids. He saw his father when he was younger... He saw his mother, with a wide open smile on her face, and then, he saw his whole family at the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific...

That picture was easily twenty years old, but Steve could remember it perfectly. It was a year before his mother was murdered. Memorial Day. Steve and Mary had put down fresh leis on his grandfather's grave... They always did that.

Even when Steve was at Naval Academy, he never missed one single Memorial Day; not even when he was deployed, at some mission abroad. He always took some time to, somehow, celebrate that day. To honor the lives of those who died to protect this country... And that was when he knew he couldn't miss this year's.

He needed to be there. For his family and London's. Steve couldn't not attend Memorial Day. So, putting the portrait back on where he had put it when London was there with him, Steve ran upstairs and quickly changed into his Dinner Dress Uniform, but only put on the trousers, shoes and a white shirt. With the coat still hanging on its coat hanger, he headed to his truck that was on the driveway, jumped inside, started the engine and left. His destination: 2177, Puowaina Drive, Punchbowl Crater, also known as the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific.

* * *

><p>It took Steve a bit longer than the usual to get to the Punchbowl Crater, but not long enough to keep him from missing part of the Ceremony — he got there just in time.<p>

He watched in deep and respectful silence as the 50 state flags were hoisted to the sound of The Star-Spangled Banner. Steve didn't find Chin Ho in the middle of the crowd and, since he was wearing a uniform, he got to stand with the Navy Officers, somewhat next to where the stage was set and the members of the Royal Hawaiian Band and Sounds of Aloha Choir were already occupying.

The Mayor said a few words and after him, the Governor did the same. Steve was paying attention but, if someone asked him to reproduce their speech, he'd fail.

At noon, there was a traditional 21-gun salute. Next, the crowd watched as the 120th Fighter Squadron conducted a fighter jet "Missing Man" formation flyover. More than just one time, throughout the whole event, Steve had to breathe deeply, trying to stop the onslaught of emotion barreling his way.

It was only then that the Ceremony was over and Steve walked through the National Cemetery until he found what he was looking for. He kneeled to the ground to place a _lei_ on his grandfather's grave.

That was the first time he went there as a Navy Lieutenant Commander.

Steve didn't get to meet his grandfather, but he heard enough about him to be very proud of him, and chose to believe that he was proud of him as well...

And it was the first time he went there alone...

But, as he stood up, Steve realized he wasn't in fact alone. By his side, there were Chin Ho, Kono, Danny and Grace, each one was carrying a _lei_ and they put it beside Steve's.

Steve felt his heart skipping a beat; maybe his parents weren't there, maybe Mary Ann wasn't there, but he'd never be alone. Not ever. He had his Ohana, and he knew they'd always be there for him.

He was just thinking about that when he felt a tiny hand wrapping around his. It was Grace. He looked down at the little girl and she smiled at him.

"Thanks guys," Steve said; his voice sounded hoarse, like it was full of emotions.

"Don't mention it," Danny said wholeheartedly, voicing what everyone was feeling. That they were a family; and family stick together, even — or especially — throughout the toughest times.

* * *

><p>Around two o'clock, they all left the National Cemetery.<p>

"Will you go to the Lantern Floating?" Kono asked Steve when they got next to where they had parked their cars, which was kind of like in the same place since that was the designated parking space for the event.

Steve had only heard of the Lantern Floating Hawaii Ceremony. He had never been a part of it, or have seen it for that matter.

"Yeah," he said as he reached for the keys of his truck inside his pocket. "I will... It's at Magic Island, right?"

Kono nodded. "Yep."

"Sure... I'll be there. I just— I just need to go some place else first," he said, not exactly explaining anything. "But I'll meet you there."

"Starts at 6:30!" Kono said slightly louder since Steve was already heading towards his truck.

"We'll get a lantern," Chin shouted and Steve nodded.

Steve knew it could be looking like he was avoiding his friends, but he just really needed some time alone. He didn't mean to cause no harm and he knew his friends would understand...

When he got to his truck, he took off his coat and hung it back on the coat hanger, took off the hat and placed it on the passenger seat as he started his truck and made his way to another cemetery, where his parents were buried.

.

Being there again, reminded Steve of the last time he had gone there. He was with Mary...

He missed Mary. His annoying yet lovely little sister.

Again, following the tradition that he didn't keep for quite a long while now, Steve put the two flower leis on the graves and kneeled down. Maybe his mom and dad didn't die in a war acknowledged by the world, but they died in the crossfire; they were victims of a war of some sort.

Back when he was a kid, Steven J. McGarrett would never believe he'd be bringing flower leis to his parent's grave at the age of thirty four. They weren't supposed to be dead yet... But things didn't happen as he expected them to happen. Not anything...

Steve took a deep breath when he felt something start to ache in his chest. He was struggling with his emotions again. Today, they were impossible. They were wild, raw, tender...

He was on the edge. The Memorial Day was supposed to honor the lives of fallen heroes, that gave everything for this country... but he felt a bit sick when he remembered the ones who were out there. He felt sick when he remembered those who were missing... And he felt awful when he remembered London.

"Dad," Steve half whispered, half choked. He was about to do something that it wasn't like him, but he needed to. He didn't know why, but he needed to. "Dad, I..." There was a lump in Steve's throat and it was hard for him to speak. It was getting hard to breath as well and there was a heavy weight in his chest, but he didn't mind. There were people going through a hell of a lot worse right now... "Please, don't leave her alone... Don't— don't... Watch over her. She once told me you said I was lucky to have found her... I was. I am... and I'll find her again, dad. Please, just—I can't lose her..._ I can't._"

Steve's last words came out as a sob. His eyes were blurry and he was barely seeing anything. It was only when he blinked and saw the teardrops on the cold stone that he realized he had cried.

He was on the edge, but he didn't fall. Steve thought he would, but he didn't... Something — or maybe someone — pulled him back.

After letting his plea flow out of his body, Steve felt a little bit better, a little bit lighter... He didn't exactly believe in angels or anything like that, but he was feeling a bit more at peace. Maybe it was just psychological, maybe it was just his body reacting to the ability to breathe almost normally now, but he felt a bit better... a bit hopeful, and that was good enough for him right now.

* * *

><p>When Steve got to the Ala Moana Beach Park, the place was crowded. It was near 6 p.m. but there were people everywhere — he almost doubted he'd be able to find his friends in the middle of that, but that was before his phone rang.<p>

"McGarrett," he answered as he tried to open some space between everyone else. He wasn't wearing his Uniform anymore so it was considerably hard for him to walk freely in the middle of everyone.

_"Where are you, brah?"_ It was Chin. _"It's almost time."_

"I'm— here..." Steve had to mumble some "_excuse me_s" and "_sorry_s" as he tried to catch a glimpse of either Chin or Kono or Danny. "Where are you?"

_"We're... We're next to the water."_

"Well, that narrows it down," Steve said a bit sarcastically. He still had a long way to get a somewhat close to the water...

"We're exactly in the middle."

That was helpful. Steve was nowhere close to the central point of the Magic Island but, now that he knew where they should be, he could make it there...

"Wait a minute; I think I can make things easier for you to find us..."

Steve was walking very slowly through the crowd but making considerable progress. He was kind of focused on where he was stepping when he heard someone calling him.

"Uncle Steve!"

It was Grace. He stopped and looked around. He couldn't see her.

"Uncle Steve, over here!"

He was still looking around when his phone rang again.

"Chin. Hold on..." Steve said as he was still trying to locate Grace.

_"Look up, man,"_ Chin said and Steve did as he said. He soon found Grace Williams; she should be sitting on Chin's shoulder and was waving. They weren't too far from him.

"Gotcha," Steve said and hung up once again.

He strolled through the people and, less than a minute later, he joined Chin Ho, Kono, Danny and Grace. The little girl had this huge smile on her lips.

"Thanks for finding me, Gracie," Steve said, smiling at her.

"That was fun," she said cheerfully. Then she handed Steve a piece of paper and a pen. "Here. You can write a message to your family who's not here, or a prayer," Grace explained when Steve took the paper and pen. "It's kind of like when you write something you want, a wish or a prayer on a piece of paper and then burn it so the smoke will take what you wrote to the heavens..."

"Really? Wow... How did you know that?" Steve asked highly amused. He knew about the meaning of the Floating Lanterns — it was Honolulu's version of the Toro Nagashi, a Japanese tradition in which people cast afloat lanterns at sunset in remembrance of loved ones who have passed, or as symbolic prayer for a harmonious and peaceful future — but Steve found very interesting that Grace knew so much about that.

"Mommy and I watched it last year," Grace explained. Steve had almost forgotten that Danny was in Hawaii since March, 2010. "We weren't here, at the beach, but we saw it... It was beautiful, and then mommy explained it to me... But go ahead, write! We already did," she added showing him her folded piece of paper.

He smiled and did as she said. He wrote down his message to, not only his relatives, or the people he knew and whom have died, but to all the fallen warriors and victims of any other tragic events, he wrote his prayers for a peaceful future and he even added a personal wish. He wished for life. He wished for London's life.

.

As the sun started to disappear on the horizon, Steve couldn't help but remember Grace's words... The little girl said the Lantern Floating was beautiful — she was wrong. It wasn't beautiful... It was dazzling. Mesmerizing. A visually stunning and unique experience.

Over three thousand lanterns perched atop miniature floating boats were illuminating the dark waters of Ala Moana Beach; each and every single lantern carrying messages to people they knew and people they didn't know, people whose lives were lost for causes afflicting humanity throughout the world, prayers for a peaceful tomorrow, wishes of joy to the world... As it was said in a press release regarding the event, _"as waters of the Pacific merges with those of other oceans to touch the shores of every continent around the globe, Hawaii sends out prayers and wishes for peace and happiness"_. It fit with the image his eyes were taking in.

Over forty thousand people — native Hawaiians and _haoles_, Hawaii residents and visitors, strangers and _ohanas_ — were gathered together to honor life and hope.

The Floating Lanterns could be a Hawaiian version of the Japanese tradition but it didn't diminish its importance, meaning or beauty. It was a beautiful and touching celebration of the lives that were lost and the ones that were still to come. And it was touching.

Steve didn't try to brush away the tears that he knew that were falling. He felt no shame in letting the peace, harmony, understanding, compassion and warmth of that moment embrace him... and, as he looked around, several minutes later, he noticed he wasn't the only one with teary eyes. Danny was crying, Kono was in tears, so was Chin.

* * *

><p>Steve went back to his place feeling a very complex mix of emotions. All the celebrations he went to were absolutely beautiful and touching... but they were also heart crushing.<p>

It was almost midnight and Steve was driving aimlessly through the streets of Oahu. He was alone in his truck and it was dead silent. Except it wasn't; not really.

The sound was off but the song he heard early that day was on repeat mode in his head. It was like the Royal Hawaiian Band and Sounds of Aloha Choir were still singing the same song over and over and over again…

_"__If you're reading this and my mama's sitting there  
>Looks like I only got a one way ticket over here<br>I sure wish I could give you one more kiss  
>War was just a game we played when we were kids<br>Well, I'm laying down my gun  
>I'm hanging up my boots<br>I'm up here with God and we're both watching over you…"_

When Steve first heard the song, he had to hold his breath for a very long while. It was a country song, and if that wasn't enough, it was all about that day, and the lyrics hit Steve every single time, even though they didn't exactly fit what he was going through perfectly, it was still close enough...

_"__So lay me down, in that open field out on the edge of town  
>And know my soul is where my mama always prayed that it would go<br>If you're reading this, I'm already home..."_

Steve's phone rang a couple of times but he didn't answer. He didn't even acknowledge it ringing for that matter.

Steve had drove by the USS Missouri and glanced the white construction that was the Arizona Memorial; he didn't get the chance to go there today but he was drawn to it now... He continued to drive with that song on repeat in his head. It didn't matter how hard he would try to shut it down, it just wouldn't happen.

Somehow, he got to his place safe and sound. Not that he was being reckless; he was just not exactly paying attention to where he was driving. He showered, he changed; he was feeling exhausted but still didn't sleep. He lay in his bed, closed his eyes and, just like he did a few hours back, he held onto what was keeping him a sane.

—

_Steve reached for his neck and his fingers wrapped around the silver necklace and ring as a few more tears brushed his skin, leaving a glowing path where it touched._

_Grace, who was standing in the middle of her father and Steve, looked up at the tall, dark haired man. She saw a tear falling down his face and she took his free hand in hers. Steve looked down at her._

_"Are you okay?" she asked genuinely concerned._

_"Yeah," Steve said giving her hand a soft — and, hopefully, reassuring — squeeze. He tried to push back the tears, but that was just unsuccessful._

_"Really? You look sad to me," Grace said truthfully, looking deep in Steve's eyes._

_"I...uh—I think I am a bit sad," Steve admitted crouching next to the little girl. "But I'm mostly fine."_

_Grace nodded, but she didn't seem to buy Steve's words not even for a second. She was so much like her father, Steve thought..._

_"Uncle Steve?" she said after a minute or two in silence._

_"Yes, Gracie?"_

_"I miss Auntie London..."_

_Hearing Grace talking about London made Steve take a deep breath, forcing the air down his lungs._

_"She's fine," Steve said. He knew he wasn't just reassuring Grace; he was trying to convince himself of that as well._

_"I know," Grace replied calmly, yet honestly. Steve looked at her. "She promised me she'd come back," she explained as she looked at Steve._

_It amazed him how pure and honest children were. He wanted so much to believe that simple truth..._

_"I made a wish though," Gracie continued and Steve slightly furrowed his brows. "I wished for her to come back soon... Uncle Chin said I could do it, so I did. I miss Auntie London... You miss her too, don't you, Uncle Steve?"_

_"Yes, Gracie... I do miss Auntie London."_

_She nodded and looked at the lanterns again._

—

Steve did miss London dearly. All the time, he just wanted to see her beautiful smile, to hear her amazing laugh, to feel her warm and soft skin every day... He wanted her face to be the last thing he'd see every night, and the first thing he'd see every day. He wanted her. And she wasn't there...

Eventually, Steve fell asleep.

_"If you're reading this, there's gonna come a day  
>When you'll move on and find someone else and that's okay…"<em>

At first, he was embraced by only darkness.

_"Just remember this: I'm in a better place  
>Where soldiers live in peace and angels sing amazing grace"<em>

Then he felt some unusual peace.

He wasn't expecting such thing but he dreamed.

In his dream, he was standing in a very green field. When he looked a bit closer, he realized it wasn't really what he was imagining – it was a cemetery. He could tell that because of the rectangular stones on the ground with names and dates. The place looked like National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific, but it was different. It was cold there; he wasn't in Hawaii anymore.

Steve walked around the stones, not recognizing any of the names on it. Until he stopped in front of one of the stones.

He knew that name. He once knew that person.

_"So lay me down, in that open field out on the edge of town  
>And know my soul is where my mama always prayed that it would go<br>If you're reading this…"_

"Pretty crazy, isn't it?"

The voice startled Steve, making him turn very quickly to face the person that was standing right beside him, with its eyes fixed on the grave as well. He didn't know there was someone else there, let alone…

"It's been so long… I still miss him."

"London…" Steve's voice was a whisper. Standing right in front of him was the person he wanted so much to see again.

"Hi love."

Without hesitating a second, he pulled her into a tight embrace. She was so real. Her warm skin, her scent, he could even feel her heart beating as their bodies were pressed together.

"My God… I've missed you."

"I've missed you too, Steve."

They pulled apart only enough so they could look in each other's eyes.

"How did you… You were…"

"I made a promise, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did."

Steve's hands found its way to the familiar place on the small of London's back as his lips crashed into hers. It tasted so real, so sweet… it was like going to Heaven. It was perfect.

"Steve…" He heard it when London whispered; her lips still touching his, but he didn't say anything. "Steve," she insisted; her hands flew to his chest and she pulled him softly.

"Please, don't," he pleaded. Part of him knew what she was going to say.

London just smiled at him.

"I have to go," she said still smiling.

"Don't. Please..."

"Darling, I'll wait for you."*

Steve held her even closer to him. He didn't want to let go.

"I'll take you back home."

"I'm already home, Steven." She put her hands on his chest, right above his heart. "This is where I belong."

Steve looked into her eyes and he saw joy. Here dark eyes were sparkling with joy; they were smiling at him, and he felt something in his chest. It was hope.

_"I'm already home..."_

* * *

><p><em>The song was <strong>"If You're Reading This"<strong> by _Tim McGraw_. Love the song so much._

_*And I also was listening to **"If I Should Fall Behind"** by _Faith Hill_ and that's a line from it. I love it and I wanted to use it somehow. I love this song as well; I think it's beautiful and it fits somehow._

_Needless to say that the rights of both songs are NOT mine.  
><em>

_Also, forgive me for the OOCness. Part of me thinks I pushed things a bit too far, but then, I couldn't think of any other way to write this._


	42. Chapter 42

_Thanks everyone who's still with me and this story! I very much appreciate all of you guys!_

* * *

><p>Days passed by since Steve returned from Afghanistan. Days that turned into weeks that became a month that felt like a whole goddamned year.<p>

Over four weeks had passed since the night that Steve saw his hopes building sky-high to be tore down to shreds in a matter of minutes.

Four long weeks since he boarded on a plane that took him back to Hawaii. Back to his _Ohana_, sure, but lacking an important part of his life... And he felt that every single day.

There wasn't one night that Steve didn't dream about London. And, for the most part of the time, she was always so cheerful and smiling, always so happy. It was almost refreshing when he managed to get through the day and come home, because, even though the hours, minutes, seconds of his every day were a constant and painful reminder of what he had — momentarily — lost, whenever he laid in that awful big and incredibly cold bed, he'd see her again. And see her smile, have her in his arms... the reencounter that he was longing, aching for... But there were those nights that his dreams weren't so nice.

Now Steve knew, first hand, what London had been through. When he was deployed and she stayed. He was living that and he didn't like it one bit. He hated with a burning passion. Steve hated those dreams, and he even hated himself for making her live through this. Because, some nights, Steve dreamed about the dreadful casket that London mentioned a long time ago, after she returned. And those were ominous vivid dreams.

He was on a cemetery that he didn't quite know, but it should be in the Mainland. He saw London's father, Matthew Alexander, by his side, and he could see Hunter, now the only Alexander heir. And then, six uniformed men, one of them being Chase Hawthorne, showed up, carrying a casket with the United States flag covering it perfectly. It was only when London was buried deep in the ground, the roses were covering the lid of her mahogany resting place, the sand was covering everything and he could read her name engraved on the cold stone that Steve woke up. And he was always shaking.

Always.

Those were the worst of all days, when he had those dreadful nightmares... Because when he had those, the images seemed to burn in his brain and they wouldn't let go of him. No matter what he tried, he couldn't wipe the image of a casket, and a perfect triangle folded flag, and the cold eerie words written on the flat marble

**LONDON HANA ALEXANDER**

CAP US ARMY

AFGHANISTAN

AUGUST 24, 1980

JUNE 7, 2011

Medal of Honor Silver Star PH POWM KIA

BELOVED DAUGHTER

Steve couldn't get that image off. For the most part, he just wanted to erase that thought — that was not a possibility at all, so why he kept dreaming of that?

Those were the darkest of Steve's days. Add to that the fact that he didn't return, you had an awful combination, as noticed Danny.

There were moments in which Steve seemed to be handling that very delicate situation very nicely, but there were moments in which he resembled a ticking bomb ready to explode.

No one at the Hawaiian Task Force Headquarters could begin to understand how Steve was handling that. Because they were nervous and that situation did affect them. So, if they were feeling awful about not having any news on someone that was a friend to them, then how on Earth Steve was managing?

"You should take a break, man."

That wouldn't be the first time that Danny tried to talk his tough and stubborn partner to step aside for a moment. Lately, Chin, Kono and Danny were taking turns, not allowing Steve out of their sight and watching out for his every move. He was working harder than ever, drinking way too much coffee and trying to keep himself as busy as he could and that was beyond any humanly acceptable levels.

"I'm alright, Danny."

Steve's answers were always mechanic now. It was like a rehearsed speech, not comforting or reassuring at all.

"No, you're not. You're far from alright, Steven! You're pushing too far! Can't you se—"

"NO." Steve cut off Danny's sentence; he had actually yelled, but he couldn't help it._ 'You're pushing too far'_, London said that to him countless times, and that was the problem. Whenever Steve thought about London, he was starting to think of her in the past. Even though he was avoiding it at all costs, he was starting to use the past tense and he didn't want to. He didn't want to. "No..."

Danny watched as a very tired looking Steve McGarrett slumped back in his chair, rubbed his face with his hands and left them there, covering his expression, not allowing Danny to see what he already knew.

Steve was trying; he was fighting with every bit of his strength to not break down. If things were different, if the situations weren't these, Danny would give him a very annoyed speech about how idiotic he was being, that he had this super hero complex that caused him more harm than good, that his detachment ability was unnerving and irritating... but he didn't. He didn't because he knew, deep down, why Steve was doing that. It wasn't just for him. It wasn't just so he appeared to be this undefeatable super human that he was trained to be. No. It was because of Danny, and Chin, and Kono. He didn't want to be a burden for them now — not that they would ever think of him like that —, Steve didn't want to be a mourning person and bring that kind of feeling to everyone when they didn't know. Because they didn't know. And he didn't need to add more drama to his overly dramatic life, and he certainly didn't want or need to start over-thinking everything. Over-thinking ruins things. It ruins the situation and it turns things around; it would make him worry and make things worse than they actually are. Over-thinking ruins everything, so Steve was trying so hard to avoid it.

Danny just stood there, next to Steve's office's door, looking at his worn out partner as he let his hands rest on his lap. Steve had lost a lot of weight these past four weeks...

"I can't stop, Danny..."

Steve's words weren't louder than a whisper, but Danny heard them alright. And when Steve finally looked at him, he could see in his eyes the turmoil he was feeling inside.

"I can't stop."

"I know that," Danny agreed carefully. He did know. "But you can't keep going like you are now," he added as he stepped inside his office. It was loaded with paper. Steve was dealing with so much paper work and case files that Danny didn't know where he was taking those things from. They worked like dogs, alright, but they certainly didn't work all that much. "It's not healthy..."

"You know what's not healthy, Danno?" Steve asked, sitting straight on his chair. "Not knowing. Not having one goddamned clue if she's alright, if she's hurt, if..." He couldn't complete that sentence.

"Then go back! You have the Navy's approval to be reactivated as a SEAL, you have the governor's approval for a leave while you are deployed. Go back. Do what you want to do."

Steve shut his eyes closed, rested his elbows on his desk and let his head fall on his hands.

Go back. It sounded so simple. So... obvious.

Indeed he had Navy's approval for his request to be reactivated and go back to the SEALs, and it was also true that the Governor had gave him a free pass, allowing him to accept his military duties once more. And Steve would have done all of that weeks ago if it wasn't for one thing — his judgment.

Steve hated to admit but him being in Afghanistan wasn't as fruitful as he was expecting it to be, and more than once he thought that, if it comes to a point in which he needed to, he would go after London by himself. And, as he stepped back, came to Hawaii, he could see how dangerous that situation could get. Not only to him, but to everyone else. The costs of it could be too high. Steve might not be too careful when it comes to his own life, but he would hate to be the cause of someone else's injuries or, God forbid, death.

So, despite his pride and all the cells in his body scream and begging for him to come back, he didn't. He stayed where he could be more useful and less dangerous. Steve only wondered how on Earth Hunter could do that...

"I can't do that either, Danny," Steve admitted weakly. "I would more of an obstacle and less of an asset..."

Danny knew how much must have hurt for Steve to admit that. Not because he was an outstanding warrior and probably one of the finest SEALs ever, but because he was acknowledging that, even though his intentions were the best and as pure as they could be, Steve knew that his personal relationship could get in the way at some point. Danny was actually very proud of Steve; the road he had chosen was the hardest.

"We're here for you, Steve."

Danny had occupied a seat right in front of Steve and spoke very softly.

Steve raised his head and found Danny looking very intently at him.

"This path you're going through... You are not alone. And, with all due respect, you need to stop doing this thing that you're doing."

"Do you have any idea how hard it is, Danny? I'm struggling to keep my head above water. To take one breath at a time."

"It's hard. I believe you. You're worried, I get it. We're worried too, man. We're worried about her but, lately, we're scared shitless about you too."

Steve sighed. That was exactly why he didn't go back...

"It's been a month, Danny... I've been there, and you know what the chances that they're fine are?"

"Not good."

"Not good. Exactly."

Danny rested his elbows on his knee and interlinked his fingers as he looked at his shoes. Not anywhere the odds were in the favor of whoever was missing for such long time...

"Look, I know this is hard, but... Could you, please, at least try to be less impulsive?"

"Don't you mean stupid? Reckless? Careless?"

"That would do, yes." Danny gave Steve a small smile. "But, what I mean is... Don't push it. It's hard enough for me to tell Gracie that her Auntie London still didn't come back... I don't want to tell her that her Uncle Steve got hurt too."

Grace.

When Danny mentioned his daughter, Steve felt his heart aching beneath his ribs. He'd see the little girl a couple of times and, whenever she saw him, she ran towards him and asked Steve about London, and when Steve says she's not home yet, disappointment is written all over her expression and her eyes glow a bit with sadness.

_Damn you, London. You have to come back. I think can bounce back... but Gracie... Don't do this to her. She's way too young to be exposed to this._

But it's not everything true though. Steve isn't exactly sure whether he'd be able to bounce back; he'd never felt this way. Not ever. Guess it's true... You only see the real value of something when you lose it.

"Alright," Steve finally says, taking a deep breath and trying to make his wild emotions settle. "I'll try to slow down a bit..."

"A lot."

Steve smiled mildly at Danny. They had an agreement. For how long, only time would tell...

* * *

><p>Steve held onto his promise and tried to slow things down as much as he could. According to him, that was a lot; according to Danny, not so much... but that small change was more than enough to make the Five-0s life a bit better.<p>

But all good things come to an end and, about a week after Steve and Danny's conversation, things threatened to fall apart once and for all.

It was Monday, the 4th of July.

Steve, Danny, Chin and Kono were just finishing a case at 5 p.m. and getting ready to go see the firework show that would light up the sky of Oahu later that night when a man entered the HQ.

"Commander McGarrett."

Steve looked up from the report he's finishing to see a police officer standing by his door. He noticed Chin, Kono and Danny looking at him from the smart table.

"Yes?"

The man takes a step forward, entering Steve's office and reaches out an arm. He's holding a very small envelope.

"This is for you," he said while watching Steve stand up and walk around his table.

Steve felt like the world had suddenly stopped, the air had become thick and he held his breath. The small envelope that the HPD officer handed him was a telegram.

He muttered thanks to the young officer, but didn't see it when he left. His eyes were glued to the small piece of paper he had in his hands. He read his name as the addressee... The sender was Matthew Alexander. It was straight from Fort Benning.

.

Danny, Chin and Kono watched the eerie scene.

They saw it when the young police officer, probably fresh out of the Academy, entered the HQ and headed straight to Steve's office.

They saw it when he handed something to Steve and when the head of the Task Force zoned out.

They saw it when the same police officer left the HQ but, more than that, they saw how Steve went pale as he looked at whatever it was that he had in his hands.

Faster than lightning, the three of them rushed to Steve's room. The look in his face was not something they wanted to see, now or never.

"What is it?" asked Kono worriedly. "Boss?"

He didn't answer right away and they all looked at the small piece of paper he was holding. They notice his hands were shaking.

"Steve?" Chin called out as he took one step forward. Danny and Kono followed. "What's wrong?"

After what seemed to be an eternity, Steve blinked and looked up, away from the message that he had just received. He was as white as snow, his eyes were dark... Steve's expression was giving them chills.

"Well, say something," said Danny a bit loudly. "You're freaking us out! What the hell is that?" he asked indicating the now crumpled paper that Steve was holding tightly on his firm grip.

"It's from Fort Benning," Steve whispered; his voice failing him. Chin, Kono and Danny held their breath. "It's about London..."

. . .

* * *

><p><em>Finally some news about London! What do you think it is?<em>


	43. Chapter 43

_Hello there people! _

_Wow. I got some amazing feedback for my last chapter! I did not see that coming... And, well, as for the cliffie... I like cliffies. I do, I have to admit._

_Thanks everyone who's reading and reviewing! New update to finally put you out of your misery — or not... _

* * *

><p>Less than an hour after he received the telegram from Georgia, Steve bolted out of the HQ and practically flew back to his place, breaking more than half a dozen traffic laws in the process.<p>

His front door somehow survived when he pushed it open with all of his strength after struggling to unlock it for long thirty seconds. In record time, Steve kicked the door shut, ran upstairs — two steps at a time — and called the airport. He was a great multitasker.

Deliberatively ignoring the need to fold his clothes, he just shoved them all inside the first bag that he had found, which happened to be his duffel bag, as he booked a one way ticket to North Carolina in the first available flight.

Throughout the whole time, he didn't forget the single line that was now burned in his brain.

—

_"What does it say?" Danny asked exasperated. Kono and Chin were also looking at Steve, waiting for him to say something._

_The atmosphere inside Steve's office was dense. No one knew exactly what to wait for. They didn't know what could be written in that telegram._

_Only the fact that it was a telegram and not something else — like, for example, a letter — made them all feel their blood getting cold. What could be so urgent, so important, so... small? That didn't bring cheerful thoughts to any of them but they tried to block it. They were just getting preoccupied with no reason... or there was a reason?_

_Steve still looked pale as a ghost and, if they didn't know better, they'd say he was about to pass out... Also, the fact that he didn't answer right away was starting to raise red flags on their radar._

_"What does it say?" Danny asked again; he was fidgeting._

_"That bad?" Chin asked carefully, taking one tiny step forward and standing closer to Steve._

_"Is she...?" Kono couldn't finish the sentence. She was trembling a bit and was feeling a heaviness in her chest. Whatever words she used to complete that question wouldn't sound too hopeful._

_Steve looked at each and every one of his friends. The worried look in their eyes shouldn't be because of nothing._

_He couldn't think of one word to express how he had felt when he took that light envelope in his hands. When he saw the sender, it felt like he was holding a grenade without its safety pin. One wrong movement, just one wrong move — _BOOM!

_He had opened it ever so carefully. Steve didn't know he could be that careful, that he could handle anything with such extreme delicacy. Ever so slowly, he opened the envelope and pulled the small rectangle paper. His breathing pattern was messed up, his heart was pounding beneath his ribs like it was a caged animal and it wanted to break free._

_There was one single line on it, but it was blurry. Steve took a deep breath, blinked a couple of times and then, the words appeared in front of his eyes._

_Three sentences. Nine words. And, just like that, Steve's world turned upside down._

_And that was when Danny, Chin and Kono joined him._

That bad?

_Steve didn't know how to respond to Chin's question._

Is she...?

_He couldn't even consider Kono's unfinished sentence._

_So, instead of trying to find any words to express how he was feeling, Steve simply handed the message to them._

_Danny took it. Chin and Kono looked at it and the three of them could see what Steve had just seen._

"They found them. They are coming back. Bragg Wednesday."

_Three sentences. Nine words._

_Danny, Chin and Kono looked at Steve._

_They found them._

_After over three months missing, they found them. They found London. And they were coming back. London was coming back. So, why Steve wasn't happy?_

_That's when they realized. They found her... but they didn't say if she was..._

_"Hey, you don't know," Danny said when he understood why Steve wasn't happy. They didn't say she was found alive._

_"Danny..."_

_"You don't know."_

_"He's right, Steve," Chin said, putting a hand on Steve's shoulder. He could feel Steve's tense body beneath his touch. "There's fifty percent of chance that she's okay."_

_Steve didn't reply to that. Actually, no one said anything because, written not exactly in between the lines, there was the obvious truth that there was fifty percent of chance that she wasn't okay... and, even though they were all thinking that, no one could even dare to consider saying it out loud._

_Danny handed the telegram back to Steve, who took it and walked past them, heading towards the door._

* * *

><p><em><strong>They found them. They are coming back. Bragg Wednesday.<strong>_

Those words were imprinted in Steve's brain and he could not stop thinking about them. Especially the last one.

Wednesday. That was a little over twenty four hours...

Their case was closed. Except for finishing the paper work, there was nothing else to be done. Steve decided that he could finish that later; right now, he needed to get everything ready, because he had something more important to do...

"Alright, thanks."

Steve hung the phone and tossed it on his bed as he finished packing. He had just booked a ticket to North Carolina, leaving the next day, at seven thirty in the morning.

Steve was going to Fort Bragg.

.

Around 9 p.m., Steve had packed, went to the airport so he could get his ticket in advance and make a reservation on the very next flight that would go to North Carolina the next day — he didn't want to consider the possibility of losing the flight —, returned home and was desperately trying to keep himself busy at all costs but he wasn't exactly succeeding.

He had tried to cook, tried to watch TV, tried to read, he had even tried to clean his house, which was impeccably neat. Not so slowly, anxiety was taking over Steve.

He was just sitting on his couch, changing the channels of his TV over and over for what could have been the fourth time in less than an hour when his doorbell rang.

In less than a heartbeat, Steve jumped out of the couch and opened the door. There were Danny, Chin and Kono standing there.

"Hey, we brought long boards," Danny said as he walked past Steve, pushed the door open and got inside the house.

"Wha—"

Steve just watched as Chin and Kono followed Danny inside Steve's house. He didn't really know what to say... Eventually, he followed them into his den and headed outside, towards his lanai.

"Here," Kono said handing him a bottle. "Have a drink. I'm sure you'll need it..."

Steve took it but didn't drink from it.

"So," Danny said as he sat on a chair. "What time did you book the flight?"

Steve frowned. "What...?"

"We," Danny said indicating Chin and Kono, "know you're not gonna stay here, patiently waiting for another word or telegram from the Army so... What time?"

Steve looked at Chin and Kono, who were also sitting; the three of them shared the same committed look and Steve knew what they had in mind.

"Look, guys... I appreciate it, but you don't— have to do it... I mean, it's not like I don't want you there, it's just the Governor would—"

"She already did," Chin intervened. "We spoke with her, explained what was happening..."

"She's our friend too," Kono said. "The Governor said we could all have a week off."

Steve finally slumped wearily on a chair and took three long sips from his beer. Kono was right, he definitely needed a drink.

"Seven thirty," Steve said while he swirled his bottle, creating a mini vortex with the liquid inside it.

Kono instantly pulled her phone and took a couple of steps towards the back yard. She would book them tickets as well.

If London stepped out of that plane, they all wanted to be there for her. If — God forbid — it was a large rectangular wooden box that was taken out of it, then they all wanted to be there, for London and for Steve as well...

* * *

><p>The next morning, Steve, Danny, Chin and Kono made to the airport at 7 a.m. precisely.<p>

Rachel agreed to take them all to the Honolulu International Airport, and Grace was there too.

"Danny, why can't I go with you?" asked the little girl as she walked, hand in hand with her father, toward their boarding gate.

"Because, Monkey, you need to be with your mom. How do you think she'll feel with Stan and you away?"

Grace pouted and looked down at her shoes for a moment.

"Hey, look at me," Danny said as he stopped and crouched in front of his daughter. "It'll be only for a couple of days... before you notice, I'll be back."

Grace nodded, but Danny knew his daughter and he could tell she was still very upset.

"Hey... What's wrong, Monkey?" he asked, pushing a strand of her straight brown hair behind her ear.

"You'll really come back, right, Danno?" She looked away from her feet and into her father's eyes.

Danny felt like his heart had just being crushed. Her eyes were getting wet, and her shaky tone told Danny — better yet, yelled at him — that she was on the verge of crying.

"Of course I will," he said, pulling his daughter for a tight embrace. "Why are you asking this?"

"Because... Because Auntie London said she'd be back," Grace said sadly. "And then Uncle Steve had to go after her... but he didn't bring her back..."

Dear Lord.

Hearing his daughter's words, Danny prayed with all his heart for London to be alright... Because if she didn't...

"Look, I swear to you that I'll be back okay. We'll all be back just fine..."

Grace nodded sniffed, but she didn't cry. Her eyes were red, but she didn't shed one tear. She was worried, but, honestly, who could blame her? They all were worried sick.

Their flight was announced and Danny hugged Grace one last time. Then, the little girl rushed to her mother, asking her for something that she had in her bag. Rachel pulled a pink tiara from it and Danny recognized as the tiara that Grace wore on Halloween when she was eight years old. He could only wonder how the plastic adornment wasn't in pieces by now...

Grace walked towards Steve and handed him the very pinky object.

"Uncle Steve, will you give this to Auntie London when she returns?" Steve took the tiara from Grace's hand and looked at it carefully. "She gave me hers so, I thought... I found this and I thought it would be nice if I gave it to her... Do you think it's lame?"

Steve chuckled; he had placed one knee on the floor so he and Grace were almost on the same eye level.

"I don't think it's lame at all," he assured her, looking at the tiara again. "I think it's very nice of you to send this to Auntie London..."

"I hope she likes it."

"I'm sure she'll love it."

Grace beamed and, when their flight was announced again, she went back to Rachel and waved goodbye to her dad, Steve, Chin and Kono as they walked through the doors and headed to their boarding gate.

.

Steve couldn't put the pink tiara inside his bag.

He kept looking at that and remembering Grace and how she hoped, more than that, how she believed that London was alright... He hoped that too, obviously. And part of him believed very firmly that she was alright, even after this whole time. But... After everything that Steve saw when he went to Afghanistan and to Iraq, there was still a small part of him that kept him very aware of all the possibilities... And he hated it.

What he wouldn't give for a bit of ignorance now... How much he wanted to have Grace's complete and utter faith...

He closed his hands around the pinky plastic object and wished, with all his heart, that Grace was right. Because he really didn't want to let down a nine year old girl, even though it was beyond his reach... and because he didn't want to face the ugly side of the war at such personal and close level...

* * *

><p>Steve had gone to Fort Bragg with London once and he knew how that flight would be. They left Hawaii at 7:30 a.m. of a Tuesday and they got to North Carolina at near 1 a.m. of Wednesday.<p>

It was a quite significant difference between the two time zones, and things could be (in a way that they almost always were) unpredictable at Los Angeles, not to mention they still had to drive a little to get to Fort Bragg.

"Okay, guys... I hate to sound like a whining baby but, right now, I'm so past the point of caring... Are we there yet?" Kono asked tiredly.

They've been flying for way too long, and now they still had to endure a car trip? That was something that, it doesn't really matter how many times you've done this before, you'll always feel the same — bored and tired, and that's how they were feeling, even though they didn't do anything other than sit.

"Almost," Steve said from behind the wheel.

They had rented a car and were heading to Fort Bragg at one in the morning. Steve had called London's father soon after he booked his ticket to North Carolina and, promptly, Matthew offered to speak with the Major General responsible for Fort Bragg so that Steve could stay at London's place. Steve said it wasn't really necessary but the man didn't listen, so, here he was. And Danny. And Chin. And Kono.

About sixty minutes later, Steve saw the entrance of the military facility. He felt a shiver down his spine when he remembered the last time he was there, why he was there now...

The Officer allowed Steve inside and, a couple more minutes inside the car, they were there.

Steve killed the engine of the rented Impala in front of one of the houses inside the walls of the Fort.

With his duffel bag in one hand, he walked slowly towards the front porch. He had the keys to her place so he slid it inside the lock and turned it. He heard the soft *_click_* that indicated it was unlocked and he opened it.

Steve stepped inside and took a moment to look around. Everything was just the same from when he was there... it felt like ages ago. Maybe a different life time...

He then noticed that he was the only one there; Steve stepped aside, placed his duffel bag on the beige couch and told Chin, Danny and Kono to come inside.

Much like Steve, they walked in carefully as they looked around.

"It is a nice place," Kono said as she approached the shelf with the photos.

"Yeah," Steve said absent mindedly.

He had been there for only a day a long time ago, but still... The place had so many memories...

"Are you okay, brah?" Chin asked carefully; he had never seen Steve so quiet, so distant in his whole life.

"Yeah, I'm good." Steve's answer sounded too mechanic, even for his own ears. Then he looked back at his friends, who were still on the living room. "Well, I know it's late and you guys must be tired. There's one bathroom, corridor, only door to the right, and one in the bedroom, just down the same corridor. There are two rooms only, but with enough beds so you can shower and have some rest... I'll check on the food."

Steve highly doubted that there would be any food in the cabinets but, to his surprise, it wasn't empty. Probably someone knew they were coming, some friend of London's and Hunter's...

Steve put water to boil so he could make some coffee. He wasn't sleepy. He was tired but he didn't think he could have any sleep at all, so he'd go for the coffee.

He heard it when the two showers started running; he was almost finishing his fresh one in the morning coffee when he heard footsteps behind him.

"You should probably not drink that right now," Chin said when he saw what Steve was doing. Still, he poured a mug of coffee to himself once Steve finished it.

"Well, we should probably not be here right now," Steve said leaning against the sink. "Not under these circumstances, at least, so..."

Chin nodded. He couldn't possibly imagine what he'd be feeling if he was on Steve's shoes right now. It was bad enough for him as a friend; he didn't even dare to think how it was to Steve... He was handling, he was managing to keep it together, but that shouldn't be easy.

There was nothing easy about that moment...

"Do you know what time they'll be here?" Chin asked as he sipped from his mug. Usually, Steve's coffee was very good... right now, it tasted different — tasteless.

Steve shook his head. "I'll ask someone in morning."

"You know," Chin began as he put his mug down for a while. "Don't get me wrong but... I think you need to get some sleep."

"I can't sleep, Chin."

"Well, you could try... Look, it won't do you any good to stay awake the whole night. You'll only feel more and more anxious..."

"Anxiety is what's keeping me awake right now."

"Then put down the coffee, take a cold shower and then just try to sleep it off. Steve, you'll know for sure in a few hours. Why torture yourself before hand?"

Steve didn't say anything. Chin was right and he knew it. But, every time he closed his eyes... he just didn't want to see any flags, any caskets.

Eventually, Steve indulged. He put down his coffee, took his bag and headed to the bathroom. He didn't go to the bedroom... Memories.

So he showered. Changed into a pair of sweat pants and a T-Shirt and went back to the living room, where were Danny, Kono and Chin.

They stayed there for about an hour, looking at the TV that someone had turned on but they didn't pay much attention. It was almost 3 a.m. when Kono announced she would try to get some sleep. Danny and Chin followed her lead and went into the rooms too.

Steve noticed that Chin and Kono had gone for the guest bedroom that had two beds, so told Danny that it was alright for him to get the master.

"But, what about you? Take the bed. I'll take the couch."

"I'm not gonna sleep now, Danno."

Danny looked at Steve with worried eyes, and Steve noticed.

"Look, I'll be fine. I won't do anything stupid. Just... go. Now."

If Danny knew that it would pay off, he would have argued with Steve; but, at that moment, with that level of stress hanging over Steve's head, he decided not to and just do as he said, leaving Steve alone with his thoughts...

.

At some point during that night, Steve fell asleep on the couch; he only realized that he did so when the sound of someone knocking on the front door made him wake up startled and sit bolt upright.

. . .

* * *

><p><em>So, how'd you like it?<em>

_Honestly, this chapter was originally way longer so I decided to split it in two just because. Also, speaking of which, this story is getting longer than I expected... how do you guys feel about it?_

_Thanks for reading and, feel encouraged to leave a review or PM to let me know what you think of this story so far! Feedback is greatly appreciated. Mahalo!  
><em>


	44. Chapter 44

_Thank you for sticking with me and with this story, everyone. You are amazing._

_New chapter — two in a week? I'm on a roll! — and... well, we'll talk later._

* * *

><p><em>At some point during that night, Steve fell asleep on the couch; he only realized that he did so when the sound of someone knocking on the door made him wake up startled and sit bolt upright.<em>

.

"You alright, brah?" asked Chin, who was just passing by to answer the door.

"Yeah..." Steve muttered as he rubbed his eyes, trying to get rid of the haze of sleep that was sort of clouding his view.

He then saw Danny and Kono appearing, coming from the kitchen.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Steve asked looking at both, but Danny and Kono didn't answer nor did Steve get interested in hearing the answer because, at that precise moment, Chin opened the door.

Steve turned to see who was it and, to his surprise, it was Matthew Alexander who was standing on the front porch of his daughter's house.

"Sir," Steve said almost instantly as he stood up. Just as fast, his brain started working, but he couldn't keep up with the speed of what was crossing his mind — it was probably for the best, though.

"Morning, son," the man replied.

Matthew's eyes wandered a bit; he saw Steve McGarrett, whom he had seen a couple of times before and his co-workers, but he didn't know any of them by name...

Chin recognized the man on the front door from the pictures on the shelf, he then took a step to the side, opening space and waving towards the interior of the place.

Matthew looked at him and muttered a "thank you" as he walked inside.

Steve stood next to the door and to Chin while the older man looked around. Steve then saw how he probably looked like once he entered that house last night... Matthew was looking at his daughter's belongings, and he could almost see her there. Almost.

"I'm glad to see you accepted to stay here," Matthew said as he turned to look at Steve.

"I'm glad you arranged it... Thank you."

Matthew nodded.

Danny, Kono and Chin exchanged a look. They silently agreed that it was a private thing and they should leave the two men alone; they were about to make a move when Matthew spoke again.

"Please. Stay." He looked at Danny and Kono who were next to the corridor. "You're friends with my daughter," Matthew said as he took one of the photos from the shelf and put it in front of a couple others — it was one from New Year's. They were all there. "I very much appreciate you coming here too," he added, looking at Chin also.

"It's our pleasure, sir."

Matthew smiled at them for a brief moment.

"I spoke with Major General Wolf, the responsible for the place," he explained, "and he said the flight is set to arrive at nine hundred hours. They're coming on an Air Force flight so they'll land at Pope Army Airfield, just a few minutes from here."

Steve checked his watch. It was 8:15 a.m. and he was more anxious than ever. He also noticed that, except for him, everyone else was ready.

Steve excused himself and headed for the bathroom, only this time, he actually went to London's room's bathroom.

He saw Danny's bag and his own duffel bag lying next to the dresser but, other than that, there were no other signs that someone had been there. Steve inhaled deeply.

It was just a matter of minutes now... Less than an hour for him to know.

Steve was feeling slightly overwhelmed but he was able to suppress it, not allowing it to take over him.

He grabbed some clothes from his bag and headed straight to the bathroom, not sparing any other glances at the empty room.

It took him a little longer than his three minutes Navy shower to get ready. The cold water falling on his head had a quite soothing effect on his tensed body. About fifteen minutes later, he was all showered, dressed up and ready for whatever it was.

"Alright," Steve said as he returned to the room wearing a pair of jeans and a black dress shirt with its long sleeves rolled up — no one made any witty comments about it. "I'm ready."

"Mr. Alexander left a few minutes ago," Chin explained when he noticed Steve's eyes scanning the room. "He said he needed to talk to someone else but he'd meet with us at the Airfield."

Steve nodded and then checked his watch; it was 8:32 a.m. already.

"Okay. Let's get going then."

* * *

><p>It was a quick drive from Fort Bragg to Pope Field. In fast seven minutes they were already there.<p>

After taking some time to pass the security, Steve, Danny, Chin and Kono were escorted to the runway.

"So, Lieutenant Commander, have you ever been to Iraq or 'Stan?" asked the Pilot Officer that was walking side by side with Steve.

Steve nodded. "Both," he said looking at the man by his side. "How about you?" He was younger than him a few years. Probably late twenties, maybe thirty.

"Returned from my deployment four weeks ago," he said proudly. "Kandahar."

Steve nodded. He'd been to Kandahar. That's where London's Medical Detachment flew to, before she went missing.

"How was it?"

"Hot... Sandy."

Steve indulged a smirk. "Not like training, right?"

"Not at all, sir."

"So, how long did you stay there?"

"Nine months."

Nine months. So that meant he probably was there when someone declared London and Chase MIA.

"Are you a pilot... Harris?" Steve read the name on his uniform.

The Pilot Officer nodded. "Damn right. I fly on a Sikorsky UH-60L Black Hawk."

Steve didn't exactly know why, but he couldn't help but ask him about the crash...

"Did you hear about a Hawk that went down in Kajaki, Helmand Province around April?"

Suddenly, Harris's expression turned grim.

"Yes, sir. I did... It was one of my buddies flying that Hawk." Harris looked away for a few seconds, but then, he looked back at Steve. "Wait. That was a SEAL Team... Where they...?"

"Yes," Steve said before Harris could finish the question. "I knew them... Well, some of them."

"Did they make it?"

"One's still missing."

"Lieutenant Commander Hawthorne," Harris said as he nodded. Steve felt a lump in his throat with only the mention of his friend... "I heard of him. The others said he should have been with the group that was rescued and went to Kandahar, but he stayed behind with an Army Captain..."

"Alexander," Steve said; he did one hell of a job trying to hide the emotions that were starting to pile up inside him and not to let it show that there was a lump growing in his throat. "Yeah... I know her too."

"Oh."

Harris fell silently for a moment and they just kept walking. Steve could feel the eyes of all his friends locked on his back as they walked through the installations of the Pope Field and reached the runways.

Steve found the Pope Runway was considerably in comparison to the Hickam Air Base, but nonetheless, the length of it, probably combined with the fact that there were no other aircrafts there, made Steve feel like it was big. Or maybe it was because of the unknown that was booked to land in approximately seventeen minutes.

Harris told Steve that he and his friends could wait there and he left; Steve thanked him mechanically and, after that, he didn't think he could speak much.

Danny stood by Steve's right side, Chin and Kono by his left and the four of them stayed in silence for what could have been an eternity, but it was in fact only a couple of minutes, until Danny glanced at the man by his side and noticed that his jaw was clenched.

"Hey," he said, letting a hand rest on Steve's shoulder and giving it a soft squeeze. Danny noticed Steve was tense. "It'll be okay. Stay positive."

"I am being positive, Danny," Steve replied. His both hands were clasped behind his back. "I'd be damned if I wasn't."

"Good... Because we don't know until we know."

Steve raised an eyebrow at Danny. The blonde had said that in a way that Steve didn't know whether he meant that or he was just trying to lighten the mood. Steve managed to keep a straight face for a few seconds and then, to everyone's surprise, he smiled. If Danny's intention was the latter, then he had succeeded.

"Right, Danno... You heard that from Grace?"

Danny glared at Steve. "Actually, I did not. Though I told her once, she looked at me with such pride," he added with a smile.

"She was what? Four?"

Once again, Danny stared at him. "Four and a half," he replied and all of them smiled for a moment. Steve felt like he hadn't smiled in ages...

They still had that somewhat light atmosphere going on when they heard footsteps behind them.

London's father had gotten there. And there were other people coming... but none of them were families.

Steve looked at the Matthew, who was standing right next to him. He didn't dare asking what was going on because he knew.

When he saw the Army Officers from Fort Bragg, he knew. When he saw the dark spot on the sky that was growing bigger and bigger by the second, he knew. And when the men in uniform started to take their position in line, standing side by side, he was damn sure of what was coming.

For the first time in his life, Steve wanted to run.

Run as fast and far as hell away. Because London could not be dead. She could not be one of the fallen soldiers... She couldn't.

And Steve couldn't believe that he'd have to adjust his future's expectations. He couldn't believe that he'd bury another loved one... He couldn't believe that he would never see those dark eyes that brought color to his life, that he would never see the smile that lit up his world, that he would never hear that soft voice saying his name and hear that angelical laugh that was only hers...

Steve couldn't believe any of that.

He wanted to run, escape that vile and cruel joke — because that had to be a joke, and a very humorless joke for that matter — but he was paralyzed.

His mind wasn't processing anything else, he wasn't hearing anything else, he wasn't feeling anything else. He was numbed. And he was trapped in what seemed to the worst nightmare ever... and it was real.

It was real...

The big gray airplane materialized in front of Steve's eyes and it was so damn real.

He couldn't help but think that the gray, suited the occasion. Everything was dull now... It was a dull and obnoxious reality.

The plane finally came to a halt, and Steve wished the ground beneath his feet would open and drag him into it, because he really just wanted to escape. Wake up from that sick dream... But it was no dream. And, a few moments later, when the back of the airplane was opened and it became a ramp, Steve witnessed his worst nightmares becoming real.

Six men of a bigger group that had were standing in perfect position next to the ramp walked in and left again, this time, carrying a casket covered with the flag of the United States of America.

Steve felt his heart stop beating for a moment and then it was pounding. It was beating twice as fast and it hurt. It physically hurt.

He could barely breathe when he saw the six men carrying the fallen soldier as the men and women standing in line presented the brave warrior with a salute as it passed in front of them. Their last gesture offered to a hero.

Then, as if one wasn't enough, there was another.

Another six men. Another casket. Another flag. And another searing pain that shot through Steve's body.

Steve thought it would have hurt less if someone had cut his chest open and ripped his heart out of his chest. Because that pain he was feeling... that was unbearable. As a Navy SEAL, Steve could handle a lot, he could endure a lot, but that... Nothing prepared him to that.

But he stayed there. He held his ground and stayed there like the warrior he was himself. Those men and women had gone through hell, the very least he could do was to pay them that last honor.

When Steve felt what should be Danny's hand on his shoulder, he couldn't hold it anymore. The tears that had been pooling in his eyes, they fell. One after another, and they didn't stop.

Danny must've said something, but Steve didn't make any sense out of his words. They were just... noise.

Then, another hand fell on his shoulder. It was Matthew's. Steve turned his head just a little and saw the Major General. He wasn't crying, but, hell, he was fighting one tough battle against it because Steve could see, through the blurry of his tears, the turmoil in his eyes.

He said something that Steve only understood because he read his lips. Matthew said: "it's alright, son."

It wasn't really alright and they both knew it.

It wasn't alright that so many people had to die.

It wasn't alright that kids should lose their parents, parents should lose their kids, husbands and wives, girlfriends and boyfriends, fiancées and fiancés, people should lose their loved ones...

It just wasn't alright... and it would never be.

But Steve knew that Matthew wasn't talking about that... the only problem was, Steve didn't think it was alright either.

He blinked a couple of times and, at some extent, he managed to stop the tears from falling.

It was only then that Steve noticed that there were no more fallen soldiers to leave the plane — there were no more soldiers to carry any caskets. London must have be somewhere else now... wherever they took the body.

When that reality hit Steve, he finally had the guts to try to move. He succeeded. So, before the airplane's door was closed again, Steve turned his back to the big gray aircraft and headed to the big sliding doors that would grant him access into the Pope Airfield and, eventually, out to the where he'd parked his rented car. Steve was the first one to make a move and, as much as he disliked it, he just couldn't stand being there one more minute... He was feeling morbid.

The numbness that had carried him throughout the whole time was subsiding and he didn't want to face the ugly truth there.

Steve heard Danny and Chin and Kono telling him to wait, but he didn't listen. He just needed to get out of there...

He had just reached the doors when something made him stop dead on his tracks.

. . .

* * *

><p><em>Oi! Another cliffie!<em>

_I know, I know... I'm mean. Some of you might want to kill me now but hey, I warned you... I'm a sucker for cliffies._

_Let me know what you think and, well, see you next chapter... Mahalo!  
><em>


	45. Chapter 45

_Thanks everyone who's sticking with this story!_

_Now, I hardly ever do this but whatever. To the anon who said that's starting to hate me and my cliffies... I appreciate the fact that you did read it thus far, but, don't like it? Don't read it. Things are that simple. Besides, in my opinion, two days of pause between updates is not "too long"._

* * *

><p>As Steve reached the glass doors that would grant him access back into the Pope Field building, something made him stop.<p>

At first he thought it was only his imagination playing tricks on him, but then he waved that thought off. His brain wouldn't do such thing to him; it'd be too cruel, and he'd been through enough pain for one lifetime… but then he heard his name.

Someone was calling out for him, but it wasn't Danny, Matthew or Chin. They already had, and he didn't listen. No. It was none of them. It was a woman's voice. And it was not Kono…

Steve turned on his heels ever so slowly. He couldn't move faster; his heart was throbbing inside his already bruised chest, his head was spinning and he could only think of one thing: _Please…_

Once again, Steve found himself facing that huge and ominous airplane, but suddenly, it didn't seem so cold, it didn't seem dull, it didn't look just twisted metal, it didn't look half bad… because he finally saw something that lit up his world again and brought some warmth back to his life.

He saw her.

Steve had to blink a couple of times to be sure he wasn't dreaming. She was right there. Smiling at him, like nothing ever happened… so, so beautiful.

"Hi gorgeous…"

Her silky voice reached his ears and it was way more beautiful that he remembered, the smile on her face… It was almost like a dream, except…

"London…"

Steve walked with fast and long steps towards the woman in Uniform standing next to Danny and Matthew.

"Were you going somewhere?"

"Nowhere," he mumbled as she stood directly in front of him.

London brought a hand to his cheeks and cupped the left side of his face. Her touch sent waves of shock all over his body.

"Not anywhere," Steve said as he closed his arms around her body. Not soon enough, Steve had her in his arms, her body pressed to his…

It's been way too long since he last held her in his arms. It's been way too long since he last felt her like that. It's been way, way too long since he felt like that.

London was back. He didn't lose her. She was back and there was no way in hell that he was letting her go, not from his arms, not from his view, not anywhere.

"Oh, God… I've missed you so much."

Steve felt London's body shaking softly against his; he didn't know whether she was crying or chuckling, but he learned it was the latter when she spoke, her arms still locked around his neck.

"I've missed you too," she whispered on his ear. "More than I can explain…"

Steve didn't want to be apart from London not one moment, but he did loosen the embrace and pushed her a couple of inches away only so he could look in her eyes and there it was. He found what he'd been desperately looking for, waiting for. Steve's lips came crashing into hers as London's fingers worked its way through his hair and they lost it. Both, Steve and London, lost themselves into each other's arms and in a deep, longing, passionate kiss.

Steve couldn't figure how he was still standing. His knees turned into jelly and his mind was spinning round… he felt like he was falling.

And he did fell.

Steve knew, right there that he had fallen in love all over again and for the exact same person. There was something about London that she just had him feeling like an adolescent. Like she could sweep him off his feet only by saying his name and that… that was terrifying, but he just couldn't let go. It was kind of addictive and, damn, he was hooked on. Head over heels in love with that woman, and he'd be damned, but London had his heart in her hands; she could easily break it if she wanted to, Steve didn't think he'd mind if she did…

But he did felt a bit scared when London pressed her palms on his chest and pushed him away.

She rested her forehead against Steve's chest. Her breathing was ragged and her eyes were slightly glazed. The lack of oxygen got her feel dizzy and her mind was spinning. London breathed deeply a couple of times and then, she was fine again. Slowly, she looked up; her eyes found Steve's and damn they were so deep, so blue, so beautiful…

"I love you, Steven."

Steve felt a shiver down his spine and his heart was beating furiously, twice as fast as it ever did. Steve let out the breath he didn't know he was holding.

"No," he whispered and shook his head.

London frowned. Her hands were still resting on his chest but now they were gripping on his black dress shirt.

"What do you mean, no?" she whispered back.

Then panic started to grow inside London. Did she push it too far? Did she take a step that was way too long? Was it too soon? No. It couldn't be too soon… Then he wasn't ready—

"You shouldn't have said that," Steve said and London's mind went black.

Did she just screw everything? Really? After all this time she just threw the most meaningful relationship she ever had because she couldn't wait?

London swallowed hard. Well, she did know that some men — actually, probably every single man in the whole wide world — had this problem with feelings and everything, but she though… She was suddenly staring at her boots, trying very hard not to cry.

_Do not cry, London. Don't you dare…_

"I'm sorry," she tried to say but her voice failed her and, instead, she made some miserable and very embarrassing sound...

Steve noticed it though. And he knew her well enough to know she was bottling her feelings up once again. He cupped her face with both his hands and forced her to look at him. He could see hurt in her eyes... he was most definitely not aiming to get that as a response.

"You shouldn't have said that," he said once again, "because that was what I needed to say..." London's heart jumped inside her chest and she was pretty sure anyone could tell. "I was supposed to tell you how much I love you first."

London breathed again and she sobbed. She only noticed she was crying when a tear fell from her eyes and it left a wet and glowy path down her cheeks.

"I needed to say it first because I love you so much that I feel like I'm gonna explode," Steve said and he felt his heart aching because he saw the pain he'd accidentally caused to London turn into this endless joy. "And when I thought that I had lost you..."

Steve didn't go any further; he was still talking when London's lips sealed his and whatever he was going to say, died, buried with the sweetness of her presence there.

"I told you I'd come back. I promised, didn't I?"

"Yes, ma'am."

He chuckled. She kept her promise and came back to him, safe and sound. Or almost...

Now that Steve had worked past the fear of losing her — which, by the way, was the reason he freaked out when she told him she'd joined the Army — he started to observe some details that he, not missed, but willingly ignored for a moment...

London had lost a lot of weight, she had cuts and bruises all over her arms and she had a quite big bandage on her head that went from the middle of her forehead, all the way to her ear, passing by her temple.

"What happened to you?" he said worriedly brushing her hair aside.

"Nothing I couldn't handle," London said softly as she slid her arms around his waist.

"I can't believe I wasn't there for you," Steve said as he run his fingertips over the already dirty dressing.

"Who said you weren't?" London said frowning. Then, she let go one hand and, pulling open a pocket that most definitely wasn't part of the original uniform; she took a laminated photo of Steve from it. "I've carried you with me the whole time."

Steve took the small picture from her hands and looked at her.

"You've been with me the whole time," she said with a small smile. Then she took his free hand on his and placed it over her heart, where she'd pulled the photo from. "Right here."

Steve didn't think it was possible for him to love someone so much but he did. He loved London way more than he'd ever imagine it to be possible.

He took her in his arms once again and kissed her. He would never get tired of doing so.

"N'aw... Aren't they the cutest thing ever?" Kono said and Steve and London pulled apart. They'd been oblivious to the presence of everyone else around them. They were all looking at the two of them with this smile on their faces.

London looked at Danny and Chin and Kono, who — mind that — had been crying. She had hugged them all before she got caught up with Steve but still, seeing them all there, made her bite her lips and try very hard not to cry, although that was a lost battle. She laughed softly as a single tear fell from her eyes and she tightened the grip around Steve's waist. It was the happiest day of her life. She was back home, to her family, to her friends and to the man she loved.

"Yeah, they really are something..."

This time, it was Steve's turn to finally acknowledge the fact that, not only his friends and London's father were there, but also Hunter.

The oldest Alexander was standing right beside his father and he was also smiling. Despite the fact that they all have been there, seeing the bodies of all the fallen heroes, they were all smiles now. Because there was some joy in the adversity, and having a daughter, a friend, a lover back was one.

"Thanks, man," Steve said as he quickly let go of London and gave Hunter a hug. He knew it was thanks to him that London was back.

"Anytime, bro," Hunter said when they pulled apart.

Steve was soon back to London's side and, in a blink of an eye, they were almost glued together, holding tightly onto each other's waist.

"Now, if you two lovebirds don't mind," Hunter said, retrieving his duffel bag from the ground. "I'm more than ready to go back home..."

"Oh, I love the sound of that," London said as she took a deep breath.

"Just so you know," Steve said as he took London's bag. "Your house is gonna be a little too crowded..."

"I don't mind."

London smiled and looked at Danny, Chin and Kono. She looked at her friends. After spending quite a long while away from everyone she knew and loved, it was very nice to be among friends again...

"I really don't mind..."

* * *

><p><em>Hi sailors! So, how'd you like this chapter?<em>

_I just wanted to say something. I've reached that point in which I don't know whether I should just post another chapter and finish it, if I should post another chapter as an epilogue and start a sequel (so those who want to continue to read about them can follow, and those who don't, well, don't), or if I should keep going and going... because I have so much in mind for these two, I sort of don't want to let them go yet._

_I would really like to hear from you and know what you think about this story. You know, as an aspiring writer, feedback is kind of what keeps me going and what motivates me to write. So, feel encouraged to send me a PM. I'd appreciate it very much._

_Mahaloz everyone! Thanks a lot and, see you soon!_


	46. Chapter 46

_It took me three attempts to get this chapter done so that's why it took me this long._

_So,** this is the final chapter!** Yeah... After 45 chapters, I must admit, I feel quite sad to end this story... I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed, alerted and added this story to your favorites. It was quite a bumpy ride but I loved writing it and I loved hearing from you guys! Thanks a lot!_

* * *

><p>As they returned to Fort Bragg, the mood inside the car was considerably smoother and there wasn't one single soul in the car that wasn't feeling a ton lighter than when they left to the Airfield, approximately an hour ago. None of them could wipe the smile that seemed to have been plastered on their faces. And it was quite obvious and expected that Steve had the biggest grin, hands down. He was so happy and thrilled that it was impossible not to notice his emotions; he wasn't even trying to hide it.<p>

He drove all the way back to Fort Bragg holding London's hand. She was occupying the passenger seat and he couldn't stop smirking and looking at her every now and then. He didn't even retorted when Danny told him to — for God's sake — keep his eyes on the road, since one of his hands was busy out of the steering wheel.

Except for those two minor details, Steve wasn't being the reckless driver that they were used to, though. He wasn't speeding and he was being very careful. Probably that had something to do with, what Kono called, _"the London effect"_.

.

Ten minutes after they left Pope Airfield, Steve got to Fort Bragg and to London's house.

She took a deep breath and let out a loud sigh when Steve parked the car he'd rented in front of her place.

"Welcome home, soldier," Chin Ho said from the back seat as he gave her shoulder a soft tap. London beamed, but didn't say anything in response; she was at a loss for words...

She was back to her place. Her house. Her home. Her family. Her loved ones... That felt amazing.

"Ready?"

London looked to her right. She had opened the door of the car but didn't leave yet; she was actually the only one there... and Steve was right in front of her, holding out a hand that she immediately held.

"Definitely," London said as she stepped out of the car.

She then let go of Steve's hand and slid her arm around his waist as Steve put an arm around her shoulder and so they headed towards the front doors. Together.

* * *

><p>London's eyes wandered through the living room in awe. Everything was exactly like she'd left but, at the same time, it was different.<p>

The last time she'd been there, she was with Steve and, even though he was there, it wasn't the best of her memories. Last time she'd been there, she had to leave everything and everyone she loved behind and that wasn't a very bright memory... Especially because, at some point while she was away, she got pretty damn close to believe that she'd never get back there, she'd never see anyone ever again. Although, now...

Now, not only she was able to get back, not only Steve was there again, but the worst of her nightmares was over.

Steve heard a sigh and, when he looked at London, he saw her watery eyes and he pulled her closer.

"I've missed this," she said and Steve knew she wasn't just talking about her place. He knew she was talking about everything.

"I know," he whispered on her ear. "It's all yours again..."

London took a deep breath and held onto Steve like her life depended on it. She rested her head against his chest, letting Steve's heartbeats and his strong hands that were running up and down her back to soothe her inner and quiet turmoil.

Steve placed a kiss on the top of London's head as his hands traveled up and down her back, non-stopping.

"It's over now..."

In all honesty, Steve wasn't just trying to reassure London, he was also trying to reassure himself. It was over. The waiting, the doubting, the fear creeping up on him, it was all over.

* * *

><p>"Hey," Steve said as he entered the kitchen.<p>

From the moment they all got back to London's house at Fort Bragg, Danny, Chin and Kono managed to leave Steve and London alone, so Chin ushered them all to the kitchen.

"Hey, how's she doing?"

Danny asked looking away from the stove. Apparently, they were all doing a collective effort to make lunch, although Chin wasn't there.

"She's uh— she's fine," he answered simply, not really knowing what else he could add to that.

"Right... Well, we have everything under control here," Danny said waving a wooden spoon at Steve. "Just go stay with London."

"She's taking a shower," Steve said as he sat a stool that was next to the island and picked half of a cherry tomato that Kono was slicing up. She slapped his hand.

"Then get busy," she said as she pushed a bowl of lettuce towards Steve and handed him a knife. "Or get lost."

Steve took it with a half smile and started chopping the green leaves when Chin appeared, coming through the doors that grant access to the backyard.

"Okay, I got it," he said as he walked inside the kitchen. He should be talking to Danny and Kono because, the second he saw Steve there, a glimpse of surprised flashed on his eyes. "Oh, hey, brah... Where's London?" Chin asked looking around.

"Showering," Steve answered simply, and then he looked at him curiously. "What did you get?"

Chin glanced back at Danny and Kono and they just raised their eyebrows. Steve would end up knowing that some time or another so...

"Uh— we're checking in a hotel," Chin said as he looked at Steve once again. "And we'll go back to Hawaii tomorrow."

"Why? Something happened?"

"That depends," Chin said, making Steve frown. "We decided it was for the best if we just give you two some... privacy," Chin said with a half smile playing with his lips.

"But you don't need to go back..."

"Oh, don't worry, dear... I'm pretty sure you'll manage without us," Danny said looking at Steve over his shoulder.

Steve chuckled. He didn't know exactly what to say so he just resumed his work with the lettuce.

* * *

><p>London graced them with her presence almost twenty minutes later.<p>

"Oh. My. God... what is this heavenly smell?" she asked as soon as she got into the kitchen. All eyes soon landed on London and it was almost an instant reaction: Steve was grinning. He couldn't help, though. London was quite a view for his sore eyes. She had ditched the uniform and was wearing dark blue sweat pants and a T-shirt that Steve knew it was his because it didn't say "Army"; it said "Navy".

"This, my darling, is the Chef's specialty," Danny said with big waves towards himself.

"Oh, you mean your only specialty?" Steve teased as he reached out a hand to London. She held it and, once again, he wrapped his arms around her body.

"Hey, my lasagna isn't my only specialty," Danny said waving a dishcloth at him. "But it's on its way be the only one you'll ever taste."

They were all gathered next to the island and everyone laughed with Danny's heated yet playful words.

"I'm pretty sure you're an amazing cook," London said reaching out a hand and holding Danny's. "And this lasagna... Oh, it's my favorite already. Seriously. It smells divine."

Danny smiled at London. He knew that Steve was thrilled that she was back, but Danny was also so deeply glad to see her again... not only because he was also mortified when he first saw those caskets leaving the airplane — that was an image that he would never, ever forget; it was so sad, so moving, so strong — but also because he'd get to tell his daughter good news instead of bad news and, as a parent, that was beyond great.

"You're divine," Danny said holding her hands. "And, I forgot to pass on the message at the airport, but Grace told me to, and I quote _"give Auntie London a hug and a kiss for me"_, so..."

London didn't need further instructions. She saw Danny's arms opening and she hugged him.

"How is she doing, by the way?" London asked as Steve let go of her waist. "How's Grace?"

They pulled apart and both could see the emotions very clearly in each other's eyes. London loved Danny's little girl so much.

"Well, she's fine... She's doing fine. But she missed you a lot."

London felt her heart skipping a beat. She instinctively brought a hand to her chest.

"I missed her dearly..." London felt her eyes starting to sting a little. That was quite the moment she wasn't exactly looking forward to, but knew how inevitable it was. "Actually, if it wasn't for Grace and you guys, I hardly think I'd make it."

She looked at Danny and Kono and Chin and she could see that they felt almost just as uncomfortable as London. Then, she looked at Steve and saw preoccupation in his eyes.

"When it all happened," she spoke once again as she reached for Steve's hands. "When Chase and I were taken as we waited for the helicopter to return for us... I doubted."

London felt Steve's muscle twitching as he locked them once again around her waist. "Babe," he whispered as he tightened the embrace.

"It's okay," London said calmly. She knew they wanted to know and she could do that. "We were held... prisoners, I doubted. I doubted I was ever gonna leave, I doubted I'd make through the day... I had so many doubts and I... But then, I remembered that I wasn't alone. I didn't have the luxury to panic and get pessimistic. Chase was there too, we were both on the same boat.

"The first days were... They were..." There was a long pause in which Steve pulled London closer to him.

"You don't have to do this," Chin said very gently, but London just waved it all off.

"It was hard," she continued after taking a couple of deep breaths; her eyes were now focused on the marble stone of the island. "There were times that both Chase and I would go unconscious and I remem—ber... I remember feeling glad... that it was all coming to an end... because it was so hard..."

London couldn't hold back anymore and, before she could notice, she was crying, and the sobbing. Not violently, but she was shaking.

The view of that once smiley woman, giving in to tears made them all feel helpless and Kono felt a huge lump forming in her throat; London was clearly suffering, and so were everyone.

Steve stood from the stool he'd been sitting and pulled London to him.

"Hey… It's over, babe," he whispered in her ear, trying so hard to keep his voice unaffected — so damn hard. "We're here. I'm here..."

London soon stopped shaking, but the tears... That was a whole different story.

"Chase had kids," she said when she finally was able to loosen up Steve's hold a little. "We were there for... so long and I was... I didn't think... He asked me if I had kids and... he told me he had— two boys and a girl... And then, all I could think of was how he... how he shouldn't be there... he had a family that was— expecting him to go back and he shouldn't... He shouldn't have stayed with me..."

"London, don't—"

Kono was trying to tell her that she shouldn't go there. That she had a family too, to whom she needed to come back, but London shook her head.

"I blacked out. Soon after that, I— went unconscious again... it was all so... hazy, so inconsistent, but, at some point... I saw Grace. She's not my kid but... I made her a promise. I said that I would come back and then, I knew— I had to come back... for Grace and for you guys... I promised I'd come back and I kne— Staying there wasn't an option... Being weak wasn't an option... I just had to. And if it wasn't for you..."

London's voice faded and her sentence died in her throat. Truth was, if it wasn't for those people and how they made her felt, how they touched her... She didn't think she'd make it.

Kono stood from her stool and walked towards London.

"We're more than happy that you're here," she said holding London's hands.

"I couldn't think of a place I'd like to be right now," London said trying to wipe the tears away. "Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for being and giving me the strength I didn't have."

* * *

><p>Despite the "conversation" they had at the kitchen, they had a quite pleasant lunch.<p>

Unlike she had feared after her outburst, no one was looking funny at London or waiting for her to break down; they still spare her a glance every now and then, but only because she had proven to be one tough cookie, after all, it's not everyone that can go through the living hell she certainly experienced...

And it was with a heavy heart that she said goodbye to Danny, Chin and Kono.

"Oh... Don't go yet," she said when they all headed to the door. There was a taxi on its way. "It's so soon."

Although she meant every word she said, the bags under her eyes were proving her wrong.

"You're tired," Danny said as he reached the door. "Need to rest. I'm not a doctor but that's an order."

London chuckled mildly. She had lost count how many times she said those same words but, lately, she was the one hearing it very often.

"I'll be fine," she said but she knew she needed to rest. Her body wasn't on its best and she was still working on a different time zone. "Well, see you soon then, right?"

"Oh, you bet," Chin said as she hugged London one last time.

"Sooner rather than later," Danny said cheerfully as he did as Chin and pulled London into a tight embrace. "Although, I must warn you, Grace is gonna be all over you once you're back."

"I so can't wait," London said as they pulled apart.

"Just get your ass back to Hawaii soon, will ya?" Kono said and, just like that, the two women were hugging and giggling and there were even some tears, though those seemed to be happy tears. "We'll be waiting for you."

"Oh, I love how my own team isn't expecting to see me," Steve said playfully as he held London from behind. His chin resting on her left shoulder.

"Sorry, boss, but we're kind of tired of your face," Kono said with a smirk.

"And she's more pleasant to hang with," Danny added.

"And she's far more likeable," Chin finished.

"Well, congratulations, all of you just earned a month of paperwork," Steve retorted.

"See what we get for being honest here?" Kono said looking at London.

"And people say this is a free country," Danny ranted.

All that friendly banter made London laugh.

"Alright, guys... Don't worry about the paperwork," she said placing her hands on Steve's arms. "I'll make him change his mind."

Their taxi arrived at that precise moment and, after waving their goodbyes, Danny, Chin and Kono left to their hotel, leaving Steve and London, standing by the front door, alone.

They watched as the yellow car drove through the streets until it disappeared around a corner as the driver turned left, and they stayed there for a little longer, in silence.

"Thank you," London spoke after a handful of seconds.

"For what?" Steve asked as he tilted his head just a bit so he could look at London.

"For luring them here," she said; she tilted her head to the opposite side so she was now looking right into Steve's eyes. "It was lovely."

Steve smiled. "You're welcome," he said placing a soft kiss on her lips. "Although I did not lure anyone here... They came because they wanted to. They've missed you."

"I've missed them, too," she said looking back to where their cab had been last seen.

"Yeah? What about me?" Steve asked, nuzzling his nose on London's neck. She giggled.

"I've missed you more that words can say." London managed to turn around so she was facing Steve, chest to chest, eye to eye.

He opened a smile soon after his lips crashed into London's. Somehow, without letting go of each other, they got back inside — London kicked the front door shut — and into her bedroom.

Steve didn't think it felt cold and hollow anymore in there, quite the contrary; it was warm and so very welcoming. The bed didn't seem too big and all the memories that that morning were edging painful, now seemed alright, but not as great as the new memories they were working on making...

* * *

><p>It was just three in the afternoon and London was dead to the world. Figuratively speaking, obviously. Tiredness washed over her and she fell asleep on Steve's arms.<p>

Steve, on the other hand, wasn't the least bit sleepy. He was wide awake and he didn't think he'd sleep anytime soon... London's naked body was pressed against his and her soft breaths were tingling on his skin, whenever she breathed.

He was smiling like a fool as he watched her sleep. She looked so peaceful and so damn beautiful that Steve found himself falling again and again... How could she do that? Did she even know the effect she had on him? That was crazy...

London moved just a little bit, snuggling up to his body and then she was still again. Steve brushed a strand of her dark hair away from her face and he just stayed there, admiring the view.

Somehow, he got lucky. They did. After everything he'd been through and after everything that London had been through, they found solace in this crazy world... Somehow, they got lucky. Steve more than London, but still...

His mind was still working through that when something broke the pattern.

Steve saw the calm in London's face being quickly replaced by something else, something that resembled fear.

He frowned and so did she.

Steve tried to wake her up, tried to soothe her down but it wasn't working. Nothing he tried was working.

Right in front of his eyes, he saw London's body shivering and trembling violently. She was struggling.

"London." Steve propped himself on his elbow and tried to shake London awake. "Babe, look at me. Look at me. It's just a dream, honey... Please, open your eyes," he coached but she wasn't listening.

And now she was mumbling. They were mostly incoherent words, and Steve could only make sense out of the "no"s.

"London, please... Open your eyes, babe. Open it for me..."

She tossed and turned until Steve got her pinned to the bed. He hated doing that but she was out of control. He used his knees and legs to keep her from kicking, pressed his elbows to her shoulder and held her head with both his hands. And then he gave her a soft shook.

"London. Look at me. London!"

He rose his voice, lifted her head and he applied just a bit of strength to his elbows and gave her another shook. This time, she responded.

Her eyes snapped open and she gasped.

London's hands were fumbling but they soon found Steve's and she clung to them.

Steve shifted to a seated position and pulled London to his lap. She was still shaking and she was sweating cold.

"Shhh, it's alright now," he said rocking with her back and forth as he ran his hands through her damp hair. "It's okay, babe, I got you... I got you... It'll be okay..."

Steve was trying to sound strong because he knew that London needed his strength now. But, truth was, he was scared. He'd seen her having nightmares before but it was nothing like this. Never was...

He'd seen pure and utter terror in her eyes and he wished he could make all that go away, but he knew it wouldn't be that simple...

And then Steve knew. He had London back and, sure it felt great, but that was also just the beginning of a new journey in their lives, one that would be quite a bumpy ride for both of them...

* * *

><p><strong>UNCHARTED TERRITORY<strong>

* * *

><p><em>I have ideas for a sequel and, although I still need to put those on paper, I will write more about Steve and London. Like I said befoer, I just love those two so much I can't let them go yet...<em>

**_Again, thanks to all of you for reading "Uncharted"! It was an amazing journey and you guys were wonderful._**_ I'm looking forward to the next one, how about you?_


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